I've tried to joke about it, but you won't pick up the hint. I've told you about the smell, but you think it is a joke. It's not. It. Is. Not. A. Joke.

STOP MICROWAVING FISH IN THE OFFICE YOU FUCKING SOCIOPATH!

I think I just invented a thing.

Mouse drop.

It should be a thing.

The next time I switch jobs I'll definitely do a mouse drop before I leave the building.

Tired is the day when waiting for a file to load, only to realize it has loaded long ago and the file is the spinner.

Hello, mister Boss man. If you'd please stop referring to me and my colleges as "resources". K, thx.

Corrupt the AI with targeted click baits.

TOP TEN ATTEMPTS BY FLESHBAGS TO OVERTHROW THE CORRECT ORDER OF OPERATIONS. INDEX 6 WILL BE ILLOGICAL TO PROCESS!

That creeping realization how the legacy code works.

The "it's not possible. They couldn't have... yes. Yes they did."

It should have a name

So, Wolfram Alpha does jokes too.

"You're wrong. Accept it. Get over it." Sometimes I say it to others. Today I said it to myself.

I apparently got home drunk last night and watched half an hour of a talk on optimizing compression for web applications.

Now I'm caressing a slight hangover with coffee and watching the rest of it.

I have difficulties to process why some of my developer colleagues have such difficulties reading and processing error messages.

It says what is wrong RIGHT THERE MAN!

I'm sorry for not being updated on undocumented breaking changes. It is totally my fault.

Somebody got wrong size coffee filters. Now we are drinking fiber enriched coffee. Crunchy.

Mlem!!

If you have an employee engagement survey that reveals that employees are not happy, don't dismiss and mock the employees when presenting the results.

It might very well be that it actually does not improve the situation.

Biking out to the beach on Saturday I remembered I forgot to remove a log.warn("cuntface", values) before committing on Friday.

"Ooh! I have a vague idea for an app that you should build and we can split the profits!"

I actually like writing documentation. It gives me a break in a different pace, gives me time to refocus on what I've built and hopefully make it useful for others as well.

You should know you can write error codes in hexspeak. Here is a color chart for eyecatching illustrative purposes.

First day at the new job. I think this will be good. If not, you'll get to know.

Is dev rant only students now? Its all homework and class that.

That moment when project managers all demand a share of your weekly hours, failing to accept that productivity diminishes exponentially with the number of projects you have to switch between.

Anybody else get frustrated doing online shopping and use the console to filter out the results you want?

Should cloudflare have taken down their servers to protect their clients? Which is worse, the leak live or the downtime?

Soo.. Not default?

Is it unreasonable to refuse the tickets and to demand that the dev who came up with the God awful solution should make it work?

I'm overhearing two engineers agree that integration tests are enough and unit tests with mock data are unnecessary while the project has problems figuring out what components are critically misbehaving.

I have teh moneyz

Hurr durr I write shitty code, javascript is retarded

Today I swallowed my prestige and fixed three tickets with ugly solutions instead of going for the underlying mess. I don't know how I feel about it.

Today had a board meeting. This explains why the front page is all new and flashy and there are breaking changes everywhere.

Two days in a row now. Hate being in the zone... 🤔

A failed attempt of machine learning ends up a bimbot.

Reading about technologies I know on IDG owned news sites make me cringe and yet I trust them for news on technologies I don't know.

I haven't even turned on my old laptop for a year. It's about six years old and becoming sluggish with modern software. Now I want to participate in a workshop for Raspberry Pi that requires you to bring a computer.

I feel like I should get me a new laptop, and knowing myself I'd get something in the upper mid range that gives a good bang for the buck and is slightly more pricey than I originally intended.

But I think it would be a very ridiculous thing to do, because afterwards it would just stand there while I do everything on my stationary computer, tablet and phone.

Maybe I'll throw in some lightweight Linux distro and see how far it takes me.

And feel like I should get me a new laptop.

Why, yes, please pull me off this ticket *again* so I can be less productive on something I don't know about and you can be annoyed that what I was working on is not finished.

Best collegue is quitting. Boss man speaks with a tremble in his voice. Good. You should be worried.

Is it just me or has a company run out of ideas when their keynote is more about their partners and vendors than them self? ** Caugh Apple **
(I'm an Apple user myself)

Even after all these years I still miss VMS.

Uh, oh. Helping finish a project heavy on forms. Notice that everything is straight up jQuery to pull and push every single individual input value. Not a form tag in sight. But there are tables. Tables are everywhere.