"I pronounce GIF like 'if'"
"LISTEN HERE, YOU BETTER START PRONOUNCING IT 'JIF' OR ELSE!!!"
"What gif I don't want to?"

Why Java decided to use a guy resemble like nerd? It is not cool at all.

I'm starting to think we might need a global union for developers. I have been reading the comments today and it looks like a lot us getting way underpaid.

New features should be a moment of joy if they are released. So far so good. People really liked the idea of working together on opensource project. The app is updated. But then we encountered a major problem. It looks like some of us are getting so underpaid that they can't pay for the 14 dollar it cost to start the opensource project they want. We must rebel against this.

14 dollar, how much is 14 dollar. How many hobbies cost 14 dollar to start up. From running to collecting stamps. Its going to cost you more And how many hobbies are you as passionate about as your own open source project.

The next great thing is that it is show in the place where developers are eagerly looking to join a opensource project. And will probably join you're product because I'm sure between all of us there are tons of wonderfull ideas just waiting to be build.

And for me personal I do not mind supporting an app that I use almost every day. And just keeps growing without annoying ads.

So you should be more then willing to pay 14 dollars. And are ready to start recruiting your team.

And if you really can't pay. Your house burned down, you needed it for food. Your only pc is beyond saving. You can be a positive force in this community and do pay with upvotes.

But if you are to much a cheapskate to pay 14 dollars well, I think I was clear enough.

So my hard drive as making a weird, cracky, crunchy, popping noise and I was super scared. DONT QUIT ON ME NOW.

And then I was super relieved to find out it was in fact my stomach.

Another few seconds go by and I realize I was just HAPPY to find out my laptop was fine, and it was ME that was unhealthy.

FUCK OFF. It's 2 days before a deadline, I'm wearing headphones and clearly focused and you have the fucking audacity to interrupt me because you're fucking bored? Go light yourself on fire you fucking cunt

Was going to install python 3.5. Typed "apt-get install python 3.5" instead of "apt-get install python3.5".
Parsed 3.5 as regex, now it's installing 500mb of shit :/

!rant
I'm at a club and browsing devRant whilst my friends are getting drunk.
I guess I'm really an introvert and a huge nerd.

MOTHERFUCKING MICROSOFT!!! JUST SEND ME THIS FUCKING EMAIL !!!! WTF IS WRONG WITH YOU?!?!? EVERY FUCKING TIME IT TAKES TOOOOOOO MUUUUUCH TIME TO RECEIVE ANY FUCKING CONFIRMATION EMAIL!!! ITS FUCKING 2017 ALREADY GET YOUR SHIT TOGETHER YOU PIECE OF SHIT

A classic.

Hard work

YYYY-DD-MM H:i:S

Damn right

There is no magic wand.

Lmao.

Sitting in my backyard, trying to mentally troubleshoot some coding issues in the fresh air, and I hear my neighbor say, "...she was picking her bum before..."

Back inside I go.

Throwing a RuntimeException because you didn't find a user in the database is just wrong

Client: "Help, something is wrong with the sever or database.. I don't know.. I.. just.." Me: "Sshh... here u go"

I'm a lead Dev on an agile team. We were just handed a fixed scope, fixed date project. On Monday, instead of helping push this out, I get to have a meeting to explain how throwing more bodies at it will slow us down.

"No! We are not code monkeys! Knowing JS and Java isn't the same as knowing our application. Stop fantasizing that it's a simple manpower issue and leave us alone so we can work these fucking nightmare timelines in peace!!"

I'm looking for a better way than that to explain it to the Sr management for the business so I don't get fired.

Metal sub-genres are really getting out of hand...

!rant

Does anyone of you know LOLCODE?
If not let me present you a simple program that displays the numbers 1-11 and terminates:

HAI 1.2
CAN HAS STDIO?
I HAS A VAR
IM IN YR LOOP
UP VAR!!1
VISIBLE VAR
IZ VAR BIGGER THAN 10? KTHX
IM OUTTA YR LOOP
KTHXBYE

You gotta love the okay thanks bye as termination :D
Check it out on GitHub

The only street with superpowers!

Plot twist: the client is actually a spider looking for a SITE to make his WEB on

Try putting a wrong ending brace, then get ready for hours of mind blowing experience.

Oh boy...

So my mom just responded to an email saying her email account would be deleted if she didn't respond to it by typing in her email address...

And the password to that email address, her SSN, and her bank account number. Now I have to fix it. For crying out loud...

Do you spell it github or jithub?

So this person i met on one interview.

// Looking thru my resume

P: so you have put this code on jithub right?

Me: yeah, on github.

... // A moment of silence from him.

So, which one is the correct?

This feels... Safe

What is TeamViewer?

(you could say that's 4 words)

SAP GUI developer interview

Questions:
1. Can you design sites for IE 6?
2. Do you hate HTML5?
3. Do you love website design from the 1990's?

If you answered yes to all 3, congratulations you are hired.

Absolutly Fuckt Up 😂😂....

This guy...