Or writing documentations...

Today is the first time in my life that I've received an all-caps corporate email from some team running ops.
Funny how someone thought this might make it clearer when all acronyms in our company are all-caps, making it a very intensive read which does everything except bring the important point forward..

Y'all ever notice how the size and complexity of a project is a source of pride for those whom created the project, and a source of dread for those who need to maintain it?

Saw one of my colleague tryna sign in into Microsoft, where it was asking for 7 digit passcode but the system was sending him 6 digit passcode. LMAO. just windows things.

I'm losing this match that I'm playing online.

I know what to do.

Type with CAPS LOCK on, and furiously type out curse words and talk smack about how I boned everybody's mum last night.

fuck google! fuck the people updating the android OS! fuck android!

first you guys removed the feature to connect wifi using WPS and then promised to bring it back but instead brought a completely different feature

then you make all the clipboard manager apps obsolete. only keyboard apps can be clipboard manager otherwise the rest of them are screwed.

app needs my location permission just so that it can turn on my wifi! wtf!

app needs bluetooth, wifi & location just so that it can send data from one device to another device offline? why bluetooth? are we going back to 1970s?

fuck you google! fuck android!

I really wish some other companies fork it and removes all the clutters and makes it better.

* Today you have to live within 150 miles of a few cities as we are working on creating "hubs" but it's still remote!

you know what?

fuck you

also, no, an LLM isn't going to solve climate change

jesus christ i am depressed beyond belief. i don't even want to apply, let alone work for any of these companies

next up: "USA only" yeah what the fuck does that mean? US citizen? US timezone? you want to hire a super technical engineer right? SO WHY NOT BE SUPER TECHNICAL IN YOUR JOB DESCRIPTION

just incredible, companies that offer 100-200K salaries and all they have is a website and a fucking chrome extension... what???

i feel like i've been doing wrong my whole life

just end it all

"I hate corporation, they hate us, they collect data on us", says the person who supports increasing the government, aka the largest monopoly and bureaucratically run corporation.

*Me enjoying life*
Brain: You're wasting your potential. You should work more.

*Me on the job working*
Brain: You're wasting your youth. You should go out and enjoy life.

WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU WANT, BRAIN?
Brain: No productivity! Only Guilt!

It's absolute insanity when your mobile recharge expires, in India if you use Jio.

Every hour you get two SMSes, one in English and one in the local language asking you to recharge.

Flash SMS messages take up your screen if you have something on ur device out of nowhere.

If you call someone 3 days before your recharge will expire you get this automated voice lecture about how your recharge is going to expire within 3 days.

Insanity.

i booked my first ever car and am having so many emotions... from scary to excited to anxious and mostly feeling super dumb.

i booked a very basic hatchback with minimal features and the lowest price. i was so not sure about the various terms that guy was using: mudflags, foglamps, tilt adjustment wheel ...

like, i read about them just a minute ago on google and next moment, this guy was asking me if i should pay this much amount to get it included in my car or not. i asked him many times and for things that i felt were useful, i got them included.

biggest things about this very first purchase is

1. i have learnt car driving from training school for 30 days. i got my license via some bribe money and did not gave the real test. I am basically a guy with no experience of handling cars. i was doing okay when learning tho

2. i am a single child from a very small, conservative and super anxious family. everytime i am gonna take this car, am sure my mom is gonna start praying to god for my safety. i too have this inherited anxiety and would probably be praying to god everytime i would travel alone.. the responsibility to keep myself safe, and the car safe, while not even knowing how to release clutch properly will be super scary

3. my friends are gonna love this but i want to become a trustful driver for them first. basically among 5 of us, only 1 had his father's car on which we have taken a lot of trips. that boy has my huge respect, and he is one of the best and most reliable safe driving person i know. he even enjoy the songs and pur conversations. i want to be like him, but currently my friends don't even trust sitting on the back of my scooty and feel scared.

4. our neighbours are probably gonna dug up their graves and roll in it. they are already very jelous and angry people, i hope they don't cause any damage to my new car.

5. i am super scared about this new car... how can i protect this precious baby... how to make sure that someone is not stealing parts off this..

so.many.fucking.scary.and exciting.thoughts!!!

Mother fucking cunts should be shot into the sun...

It's worse enough when you have to deal with many things at once...

But how the fuck can 3 people from 3 different teams have the same bullshit idea to disturb a meeting and just start talking like it's the most normal thing.

YEAH. INTERRUPTING MEETING AND JUST BLABBERING ON AND ON...

Then fucking laughing how funny it is.

Upper management found it absolutely not funny.

Working from home prevented a mass murder today.

Gather around folks, I'll paint you a nice picture based on a true story, back from my sysadmin days. Listen up.
It's about HP and their Solaris 5.4/6 support.

- Yet another Prod Solaris dinosaur crashed
- Connected to console, found a dead system disk; for some reason it was not booting on the remaining redundant disk...
- Logged an HP vendor case. Sev1. SLA for response is 30 minutes, SLA for a fix is <24 hours
- It took them 2 days to respond to our Prod server outage due to failed system disks (responses "we are looking into this" do not count)
- it took another day for them to find an engineer who could attend the server in the DC
- The field engineer came to the DC 4 hours before the agreed time, so he had to wait (DC was 4-5 hours of driving away from HP centre)
- Turns out, he came to the wrong datacentre and was not let in even when the time came

- We had to reschedule for two days later. Prod is still down
- The engg came to the DC on time. He confirmed he had the FRU on him. Looks promising
- He entered the Hall
- He replaced the disk on the Solaris server
- It was the wrong disk he replaced. So now the server is beyond rebuild. It has to be built anew... but only after he comes back and replaces the actually faulty disk.
- He replaced that disk on the wrong Solaris server

I am driven nearly to blind rage by people who insist on sending you issues as emails and just keep piling more emails on the same thread. For the love of everything decent learn to use a mother FUCKING ticket system.

Story Time.

TL;DR - Because of Corporate PTSD, I replace the word "everyone/folks/guys" with "Team" when I'm addressing my colleagues, whether it be an e-mail or verbally (F2F/Zoom/GMeet).

In 2019, An office job I worked at, a new Vice President joined the company (the same one who told me he saw me in his dream).

We were required, on a daily basis, to form a circle and one-by-one everyone would out-loud say their yesterday's and current day's tasks updates.

So before the VP joined, everyone was free to initiate their turn however they wanted. Phrases like "Hey Everyone", "Good morning all" or "Hi All" was all around acceptable.

But the moment he started joining the stand-ups, he felt the need to change this phrase to a standard "Good morning Team". No other variations of this. Only and ONLY these three words.

Why you ask? Because saying Good morning is good manners and using the word "Team" strengthens the bond between co-workers and increases collaboration and creativity.

Some colleagues were bound to forget this and they did, which resulted in the VP blasting at everyone for doing so. He would show genuine rage over this, almost as if the company would go out of business because of us, not complying to do so.

Now imagine, you get up at 8 AM, get ready, commute, and get ready to speak for the standup and you get yelled at in front of everyone, FIRST THING before you start working.

Needless to say, it would kill everyone's spirit for getting their day started but nobody could speak up against him because obviously, he was the VP of the company then.

And oh yes, our CEO fired him 5 months after that because he (the VP) got slammed with a pedophilia-related lawsuit, by the parents of a 5-year old.

Every company HR department in the 90s: "Don't talk about any sexual topic at work. It could be construed or misconstrued as sexual harassment. Keep all communications business-focused only."

Every company HR department now: "Here's a 20-page PowerPoint describing where diverse individuals of a kaleidoscope of gender spectrums put their genitals in the privacy of their own bedrooms...or out in the street in parades...or, just wherever. Don't like it? We'll be discussing your departure from the company soon."

Jesus fuck Gigabyte motherboards downloading and installing firmware updates over HTTP no fucking S

https://tomshardware.com/news/...

Companies: “We believe diversity is our strength. We don’t discriminate on the basis of sex, sexual orientation, ……”

*departments hire 90% women and 10% men*

Companies: “See! Diversity solved!”

All these "IT pros" that is constantly telling others to use ChatGPT is making me cringe.
They are basically saying that themselves are to dumb to understand or think by themselves

Reasons I am a bad girlfriend:
- I always want hugs and kisses
- I would love you so much
- International High School Visit at Ho Chi Minh City at March 19
- I would give you gifts all the time

Officially faster bruteforcing:

https://pastebin.com/uBFwkwTj

Provided toy values for others to try. Haven't tested if it works with cryptographic secure prime pairs (gcf(p, q) == 1)

It's a 50% reduction in time to bruteforce a semiprime. But I also have some inroads to a/30.

It's not "broke prime factorization for good!" levels of fast, but its still pretty nifty.

Could use decimal support with higher precision so I don't cause massive overflows on larger numbers, but this is just a demonstration after all.

You all need it.

Today is not a day for pancakes.

Today we need waffles.

Fresh warm waffles. With strawberries.

One of the craziest misconceptions about the IT industry I had was ... "They are a company, so they have tons of money, I can ask for whatever setup I want and they will provide it".

I wrote an email to my boss about how my Core i3 and 4GB RAM laptop isn't powerful enough for LAMP stack development and I need a Core i7 16GB with GTX1080 graphics card laptop to get tasks done.

My boss must've had a good laugh at me.

I like documentations like this xD
It goes with the library name “psyco”pg2.

Today I accessed DevRant and once again I've only seen posts that were unrelated to development. Politics, anti-activism, american stuff that only americans know, and so on. Since I think the community enjoys this content now, I think it's time for me to leave, after 6+ years here.
It's been a pleasure!

self.spawnChild()

Dear Microsoft, why, just why did you put config files for 64-bit application in System32 while putting config files for 32-bit application in SysWOW64? WHY?

It is like Microsoft is fooling everyone by making such stupid things. Regardless of which excuse they have, this is just an extremely stupid design.

These influencers man.. I just can't.

Today I was watching a video on how the education industry is a total scam. The video was quite nice, pointing to issues like, school doesn't sell us knowledge, instead it sells us Hopes And Dreams, and other things.

But at the end, the guy goes "By the way guys check out the link in description to get 15% off on this course that teaches you coding and principles of software engineering."

Sneaky Bastards.

Team Lead: "Today we're going to discuss how we can be more inclusive with getting people on board with XYZ organization. StackODev, what ideas do you have?"

Me: "Uh. Not really sure. I mean, it's not like we're being 'exclusive' in any way. People can join the XYZ organization without any restraint or discrimination. They just sign up on the website and they're done. There are no litmus tests of any aspect of their demographics or beliefs."

Team Lead: "Yeah, but how do we make sure we're getting more of Wanted Group A so that it's not as much of Less Wanted Group B?"

Me: "Well, that's a different question, isn't it? That would maybe meet the diversity and equity goal, but wouldn't that defeat the inclusion goal? Isn't it 'exclusive' to put more effort into attracting Wanted Group A people and less effort into attracting Less Wanted Group B people? And at what point do we draw the line between creating an enrollment system that is diverse, equitable, and inclusive and one that favors Group A over Group B explicitly?"

Team Lead: "Why don't you shut up now and we'll get ideas from some other team members."

I love when job postings are like, you will use THIS tool, and THIS is how it will be accomplished!!!! NO EXCEPTIONS!!!

bitch, i'm the senior engineer, I should be the one picking and choosing tools to match your needs, not you and HR pals!

no wonder your job offer still isnt' filled!

i'd love to ask these organizations why they chose such boomer technologies in the first place and why there is no effort to change to much more developer / user friendly tools.... just a red flag from the start