A tcp packet walks in to a bar and says “I want a beer”, barman says “you want a beer?” and tcp packet says “yes, a beer” .

In high society, TCP is more welcome than UDP. At least it knows a proper handshake.

A bunch of TCP packets go into a bar, until it’s overcrowded. The next day, half as many go in.

A bunch of TCP packets walk into a bar. The bartender says, “Hang on just a second, I need to close the window.”

When I try to send SYNs to chicks, I don’t get any ACKs. Just FINs and RSTs.

IP packet with TTL=1 arrives at bar. Bartender: “Sorry, can’t let you leave…and you don’t get any beer either…” 

The worst part about token ring jokes is that if someone starts telling one while you are telling yours, all joking stops.

The great thing about TCP jokes is that you always get them.

The problem with TCP jokes is that people keep retelling them slower until you get them.

I would tell some UDP jokes too but I never know if anyone gets them

The best thing about UDP jokes is that I don’t care if you get them or not.

I had a funny UDP joke to tell, but I lost it somewhere...

The sad thing about IPv6 jokes is that almost no one understands them and no one is using them yet.

I tried to come up with an IPv4 joke, but the good ones were all already exhausted.

A DHCP packet walks into a bar and asks for a beer. Bartender says: “here, but I’ll need that back in an hour!

DHCP jokes only work when there is only one person telling them

The worst part of SSH jokes is that, even when they're not funny, you suck it up and just pretend they were anyway.

The problem with token ring jokes is you need to wait your turn to laugh

I’d make a joke about UDP, but I don’t know if anyone’s actually listening…

😂😂😂

Get to a client office and find this...

Funniest pull request in github 😄😂 :

https://github.com/torvalds/linux/...

Don't usually re-post but this....

Linux destro guide for n00bs.

😂😂😅😅

Outplayed.

That feeling you get when you compile and there are no warnings

when you solve a problem without Googling...

F*cking wifi driver on acer aspire. Suddenly the WiFi stops working, no way to turn it back on. Alright I'll restart if that helps your pedantic ass. Fucking hangs in restart and then crashes.... THIS IS THE SECOND TIME WITH THE LATEST DRIVERS! DID YOU JUST JERK OFF ON THE SOURCECODE OF YOUR DRIVER OR DID YOU ACTUALLY FIX THE BLOODY THING.

Anyone else here ever used a bit of bluff to land a job?

If doctors were treated like web developers!

Don't do this, Chrome

When one of those "Your windows has been infected, click here to remove virus now" ads slips through the adblocker while I'm on my Linux

"I don't need a separate drive for backups"

I've been on dark devrant since it was released and today I was wondering what the light mode looked like again..

*switches to light*

After my eyes burned away I remembered why I use dark mode in the first place and switched back 😂

So, today, I've tried Gimp. And...

... It was the best s**t given me to learn and make sprites with.
Seriously, from the moment we know how to use it, it becomes the most useful thing for this.
Photofiltre is called off the stage.
#YouthoughtthatwasarantbutitwasmeDio