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Our CTO has been told, this morning by management, that our development department is "too quiet" and that it's spoiling "the atmosphere" of the office space.
So we've ordered mechanical keyboards.21 -
When one of those "Your windows has been infected, click here to remove virus now" ads slips through the adblocker while I'm on my Linux
4 -
This is by far the best please turn off your Adblock I have ever seen. I actually paused my ad blocker 😂
49 -
I just saw a website that hid the login and sign up buttons while ad block was enabled. No popups or anything asking me to disable the ad block.
Well played developer, well played.6 -
Client : Can you make some adblock?
Me : Why? There is a lot of good things already...
C : I mean... Listen carefully.
M : ok
C: i have some google ads and user blocks with adblock
M : yeah, that is normal
C : so i implemented adblock blocker which blocks adblock so that i can show the webpage plus ads when the user disables adblock.
M : i bet users hate that.
C : yeah, so users found out a way to disable adblock blocker which disables adblock blocker which i implemented to show the ads! So i cant earn revenue..
M : so what?
C : Can you make ad block block block block?
M : Sure. How much will you give me ?
C : 20 to 30 dollars
M : great ( the most generous client ever seen)
*couple of years later*
Client : can you make ad block block block block block block block block block block?
Me : i cant understand
C : count the number of block
If there is odd number of block i means to block ads.
If there is even number of block ads, it means to show ads making user to disable ads.
M : so just tldr your request this time
C : even number
M : ok how much will you pay
C : 20 to 30 dollars
*next day*
C : can you..
M : offline
Who in the fucking world made ads, made adblock and made adblock block?16 -
Today, Samsung placed an two A4 page ad in a local free newspaper, in which they describe since when they implemented the features from the new iphone
24 -
*buys VPN*
*Installs VPN*
*Opens VPN*
*Sets VPN to france*
*Start receiving french ads*
Sure why not lol7 -
If programming languages where weapons...
1. C is an M1 Garand standard issue rifle, old but reliable.
2. C++ is a set of nunchuks, powerful and impressive when wielded but takes many years of pain to master and often you probably wish you were using something else.
3. Perl is a molotov cocktail, it was probably useful once, but few people use it
4. Java is a belt fed 240G automatic weapon where sometimes the belt has rounds, sometimes it doesn’t, and when it doesn’t during firing you get an NullPointerException, the gun explodes and you die.
5. Scala is a variant of the 240G Java, except the training manual is written in an incomprehensible dialect which many suspect is just gibberish.
6. JavaScript is a sword without a hilt.
7. Go is the custom made “if err != nil” starter pistol and after each shot you must check to make sure it actually shot. Also it shoots tabs instead of blanks.
8. Rust is a 3d printed gun. It may work some day.
9. bash is a cursed hammer, when wielded everything looks like a nail, especially your thumb.
10. Python is the “v2/v3” double barrel shotgun, only one barrel will shoot at a time, and you never end up shooting the recommended one. Also I probably should have used a line tool to draw that.
11. Ruby is a ruby encrusted sword, it is usually only used because of how shiny it is.
12. PHP is a hose, you usually plug one end into a car exhaust, and the other you stick in through a window and then you sit in the car and turn the engine on.
13. Mathematica is a low earth orbit projectile cannon, it could probably do amazing things if only anyone could actually afford one.
14. C# is a powerful laser rifle strapped to a donkey, when taken off the donkey the laser doesn’t seem to work as well.
15. Prolog is an AI weapon, you tell it what to do, which it does but then it also builds some terminators to go back in time and kill your mom
All credits go to Vicky from damnet.com6 -
A software engineer was smoking...
A lady nearby asked him: "Can't you read the warnings? Smoking is injurous to health!"
He replied: "We are bothered only about errors, not warnings!"7 -
Just saw a microsoft ad saying:
“Six reasons for switching to SQL Server on Linux“
Well done microsoft...7 -
Dev: "What if the user has more than 100 entries? How would that display?"
UX: "They won't ever have that many"
Dev: "But what if they do?"
UX: "They won't."
(spoiler: they do)3 -
I'm trying to sign up for insurance benefits at work.
Step 1: Trying to find the website link -- it's non-existent. I don't know where I found it, but I saved it in keepassxc so I wouldn't have to search again. Time wasted: 30 minutes.
Step 2: Trying to log in. Ostensibly, this uses my work account. It does not. Time wasted: 10 minutes.
Step 3: Creating an account. Username and Password requirements are stupid, and the page doesn't show all of them. The username must be /[A-Za-z0-9]{8,60}/. The maximum password length is VARCHAR(20), and must include upper/lower case, number, special symbol, etc. and cannot include "password", repeated charcters, your username, etc. There is also a (required!) hint with /[A-Za-z0-9 ]{8,60}/ validation. Want to type a sentence? better not use any punctuation!
I find it hilarious that both my username and password hint can be three times longer than my actual password -- and can contain the password. Such brilliant security.
My typical username is less than 8 characters. All of my typical password formats are >25 characters. Trying to figure out memorable credentials and figuring out the hidden complexity/validation requirements for all of these and the hint... Time wasted: 30 minutes.
Step 4: Post-login. The website, post-login, does not work in firefox. I assumed it was one of my many ad/tracker/header/etc. blockers, and systematically disabled every one of them. After enabling ad and tracker networks, more and more of the site loaded, but it always failed. After disabling bloody everything, the site still refused to work. Why? It was fetching deeply-nested markup, plus styling and javascript, encoded in xml, via api. And that xml wasn't valid xml (missing root element). The failure wasn't due to blocking a vitally-important ad or tracker (as apparently they're all vital and the site chain-loads them off one another before loading content), it's due to shoddy development and lack of testing. Matches the rest of the site perfectly. Anyway, I eventually managed to get the site to load in Safari, of all browsers, on a different computer. Time wasted: 40 minutes.
Step 5: Contact info. After getting the site to work, I clicked the [Enroll] button. "Please allow about 10 minutes to enroll," it says. I'm up to an hour and 50 minutes by now. The first thing it asks for is contact info, such as email, phone, address, etc. It gives me a warning next to phone, saying I'm not set up for notifications yet. I think that's great. I select "change" next to the email, and try to give it my work email. There are two "preferred" radio buttons, one next to "Work email," one next to "Personal email" -- but there is only one textbox. Fine, I select the "Work" preferred button, sign up for a faux-personal tutanota email for work, and type it in. The site complains that I selected "Work" but only entered a personal email. Seriously serious. Out of curiosity, I select the "change" next to the phone number, and see that it gives me four options (home, work, cell, personal?), but only one set of inputs -- next to personal. Yep. That's amazing. Time spent: 10 minutes.
Step 6: Ranting. I started going through the benefits, realized it would take an hour+ to add dependents, research the various options, pick which benefits I want, etc. I'm already up to two hours by now, so instead I decided to stop and rant about how ridiculous this entire thing is. While typing this up, the site (unsurprisingly) automatically logged me out. Fine, I'll just log in again... and get an error saying my credentials are invalid. Okay... I very carefully type them in again. error: invalid credentials. sajfkasdjf.
Step 7 is going to be: Try to figure out how to log in again. Ugh.
"Please allow about 10 minutes" it said. Where's that facepalm emoji?
But like, seriously. How does someone even build a website THIS bad?13 -
I'm hiring and I'm fucking done with recruiters buttering up skills etc and sending me BS candidates.
Interview earlier today...
CV: MySql skill level 10 (out of 10)
Reality: Can't write a simple JOIN!
Yesterday...
CV: PHP 6+ years exp, self proclaimed ninja/jedi/oracle.
Reality:
[Me]: Write me a function to map an array to x.
[Ninja]: What's an array?
I've come to the conclusion that the type of dev I want on my team is highly unlikely to be looking for work much less using some piece of shit shady agent to find work so I need to hunt him / her down personally and can use the phenomenally large recruiters fee as a hiring bonus / incentive.
Only problem now is finding quality full stack devs in the area (Johannesburg, South Africa).
I'm thinking of posting a 'challenge' job add to filter out good candidates - some kind of code challenge to be solved that gives them my contact info. Any one have any creative ideas I could try?31 -
Are you fucking serious! 😈😈😈
Is this what a Junior Dev nowadays needs to know to be a successful candidate?
14 -
With permission of @dfox
Hi everyone,
An mate and me are starting our own server hosting company and we are looking for some people that want to test our services before we officially release.
Some of the things we have are: Dedicated servers, Fully isolated VPS's, Container based app services and a custom build Status pages (https://status.mikote.net/).
if you are interested let me know here and send us a message on our site https://www.mikote.net/ (still in development)
All of the pricing will be custom and if you include "<!DOCTYPE devrant>" in your first message or email and you will get a custom discount of up to 90%62 -
friend: "oh my god i have a virus!"
me: "let me see..."
me: *ticks the "don't allow this page to create any more alerts" checkbox in chrome, then closes the page*
friend: "how did you do that?"
me: "magic!"3 -
Fuck fuck fuck CNET.
1 o'clock at night. Clicked a link to CNET and the fucking shit started to play a random fucking video in their sidebar with volume amplified to 200%. I'm blocking this shit via hosts right now.3 -
Fuck recruiters! I told them i want to work in a bigger company and my JS are not the best.
I just drove a freaking hour to a company who wants a diehard JS'er and exists of 4! People.
Assholes!8 -
Buttons that constantly move around the page, because of loading content, is the main reason I have trust issues.6
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So... I was watching this ad of this University offering a software course... Can you notice something weird about the code? Hahaha
The subtitles say: "I'm a Programmer"
7 -
Suddenly it hits me.
It’s 01:20 here but i get it.
It’s ALL a budget thing.
No dedicated tester means less expenses.
No personal parkspot?
No expenses!
And no good staging or testing environment? Less expenses!
Meanwhile every developer can setup, work on, and maintain about 20 websites on their shitty local Windows machine, that doesn’t even have a proper SSD installed, and we are setting impossible deadlines to figure out who will sink and who will swim.
Ow, here is a SSD.. Figure out the installation yourself because we have no IT knowledge or budget for people that do.
You want a challenge? How about 40 other people that are distracting you all day long.
Meanwhile everybody has to improve their skills in js, react, html5, ccs3, angular, .net and razor so money can made faster.
It would be nice if you could build apps as well.
You had a question? Sorry, no time. Expect some feedback 14 days later.
You finished the site?
Great!
But here are 101 bugs to solve before next week.
All hail their crazy company!2 -
Shit! I knew buzzwords were overused, but I just saw an ad and it is fucking jesused jambled bananas in the ass.
Starts with a woman looking out the window and there’s a tornado (seems ok for now)
The tornado approaches and IT IS MADE OF FUCKING NON MONOSPACED IN MY ASS FONTED 0s AND 1s. Bonus point: they are green !!
Switches to lines of GREEN code (kill my fucking brain with a pistol attached to your dick right now)
Probably JS or something similar in syntax.
And then: A FUCKING GUY LEANING OVER POINTING SOMETHING ON THE SCREEN! HIS NAMETAG:
Logan Paul
Blockchain
👏👏👏👏
And then some other buzzing asses armagedon en d of the fucking world bleeding edge vibrator buzzwords shenanigans.
Finishes with drones shot flying between businesses building with 3d floating words like
Blockchain!
Artificial Intelligence
Deep learning
Etc.
KILLLLLL MMMEEEE FU748-KFJV ING 3I6HT N0W $)&(&($8#;&(&8 jeiebc15 -
Clearing the cache.
Tried clearing cms cache
Tried restarting iis
Tried browsing incognito
Tried deleting browser cache...
WHY U STILL SHOW OLD CSS?!?!23 -
I love my girlfriend, but sometimes she doesn't get dev-work.
Last night, we had a fight over me sticking post-its to the wall in our home office. I find them helpful for keeping an overview of what I'm working on. She finds them ugly and decided to tear them all down without conferring with me. I got pissed. I almost always give in to her quirks and wants in every other aspect of how we live, so I feel like my desk space should at least be under my control. In my anger, I ordered her out of the room. She then proceeded to be sulking/angry with me up till and including this morning "because I overreacted".
Was I wrong? What should I have done differently?24 -
It's always fun to compare webdesign to car sales.
Client: We want a car with 2 doors.
We: Here is you car with 2 doors.
Client: Why does the car only have 2 doors? This is very limiting and i think 4 doors work way better.
We: Okay fine, here is a car with 4 doors.
Client: Could you please check on the brakes, i think there is something wrong but i don't know what.
We: Ok we checked the brakes and they are working ok. So here is you car with working brakes and 4 doors.
Client: Why didn't you check on the exhaust? The car is generating big black clouds now...
It's never enough7 -
This morning my girlfriend told me about the network at her school constantly disconnecting, to which I jokingly replied "So, it doesn't deserve candy". She came back with "But it's already asking for so many cookies"...
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Seriously, look at this guy’s bloody phone. He’s not letting go of it, it’s been like this for ages. He’s got missing pieces of glass above the lcd, there are cracks all over, sellotape all over. At some point you gotta realise it’s affecting the user experience.
If you don’t want to get a new phone, at least have the screen replaced!!
34 -
I spent 10 years of my life to learn how to code when I could make big money without coding. I'm such an idiot
13 -
Just had my first demo here. The resolution of the screen was set at 150% screwing more up then i hoped for.
I didn't dare to show the iPad version. I had seen enough bugs in those 10 minutes.
Don't put this developer in the center of attention. Please.3 -
1. Keep your rythm: 7/8 hours of sleep each day and DON'T take your work home. Unless you have your own business ofcourse. Still: don't wear yourself out!
2. Put on music. Me personally like fast punk when i'm struggling with a deadline. Makes you want to go faster.
3. Close ALL communication like chats, mail etc. Hell i even thought of a sign "do not disturb"
4. Coffee. Lot's of coffee
5. Use a time tracking method like pomodoro5 -
Dumb ad poster strikes again. They provide “Venture Debt and Tax Credit Consulting Services” using CSS. Oh golly!
2 -
For anyone getting in to computer vision, or people who just hate making filters and masks in opencv, you should really try out GRIP
Even though it is built for robotics, it works great for almost anything.
https://wpiroboticsprojects.github.io/...7 -
Dear Friends,
As a husband, I've sat next to my wife through eight miscarriages, and while drowning my sorrows on Facebook, face the inundation of pregnancy and baby ads. It's heartbreaking, depressing, and out right unethical.
How can we, as developers who conquer the world with software solutions, not solve this problem? Let's be honest, it's not that we cannot solve this problem, it's that we won't solve it.
We're really screwing this one up, and I'm issuing a challenge - who's out here on devRant that can make the first targeted "Shiva" ad campaign? Don't tell me you don't have the data in your system, because we all know you do. Your challenge is to identify the death of a loved one, or a miscarriage, and respectfully mourn the loss with no desire to make money from those individuals.
Fucking advertise flower delivery services and fancy chocolates to the people in THEIR inner circle, but stop fucking advertising pregnancy clothes to my wife after a miscarriage. You know you can do it. Don't let me down.
https://washingtonpost.com/lifestyl...11 -
An hour before my Mathematical Expression and Reasoning for Computer Science final...
Have reviewed all the material available but past exams are useless because new_prof == new_format.
This is not even a rant, I'm just scared because to get into the major I need an average between this and programming of 82. I fucked up in the second midterm and got a 50/100. Everything was so perfect (at least above 80) and now I need more than 70 in this final. I'm feel I can get more than 70 but I had the same feeling during the midterm I fucked up.
25 -
Fucking youtube ads... Showing me the same retarded ad 100s of times a day will definitely make me buy the thing, real fucking geniuses...
I am still looking for a way to block them forever on android, but I have no idea how. I've been looking for a public key or some sort of certificate in the apk so I could at least do a man in the middle, but no luck so far..20 -
Why the fuck does YouTube shows me ads about wix and other Website creation Tools? Google you know better then anyone what Job i have and even know that i have a Google play developer account connected with my google account.5
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So there is an ad for an event that claims that they got 96% likes on Facebook. What do they mean, did 96% of all facebook users worldwide like it? Or did 4% find out how to dislike a page on fb? I am confused8
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There was an error in one of my Java file. Impossible to find it. I commented all the code and the error remain. I commented the import of that class and no more error. How the f**** is possible that a empty class give an error ?
I opened the file in another text editor and found out that the last character was a symbol that wasn't recognize or display in other text editor.
I was really proud (and confused)3 -
devRant already replace SoundCloud as my orange app in the main screen...
To be fair, SoundCloud was just there to complete the rainbow.
Rant: this app told me that my rant would be safe if I closed the Post Rant window (since I can't post more than one rant per hour or something) but it didn't save my awesome tags! I feel betrayed.
23 -
"Intense coding. A day passes. Wait, how the fuck did my code work? It doesn't make any sense!"
It happens so, so often, God why 😐1 -
Just had the shittiest job interview ever. Had to do two tests. And since i was nervous as fuck and can't do proper JS i obviously failed!10
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I propose a list of interesting readings. Not limited to developing.
Yes, I'm in need of something new to read...
I'll start in the comments, feel free to comment new readings or critique the ones proposed.29 -
Stress balls are awesome.
Never thought they are this effective.
Like just throwing it and kicking it around in my apartment makes me feel a bit better.12 -
Regarding the Area 51 news. These guys are really stupid. They’ll deservedly got shot soon as they come close enough to the fence, and even if they get over, then what??
Anyone who know anything, knows that you need to spawn a jet pack, get to the second hanger ASAP, and jump in the Rhino. They can’t touch you after that, even with 5 stars!!7 -
Working as a new employee: no wifi. No work. 10 new tools to get familiair with. 41 new people to get to know. No workstation. No desk. No signed contract.
So far so good.4 -
So yesterday i solved 7 tickets on my own for this project while the teammate was "testing".
Solved nothing and checked fb or new everytime i took a look at his screen.
Can comeone please fire this guy?1 -
There are no words could describe the feelings when I wanted a documentation about WinAPI structure then I found this on MSDN
3 -
!rant
I found the height of my laziness today.
While watching youtube videos, I watched a whole 3 and half minute Ad and did not click on the "Skip Ad" button because I was too lazy to get up and move the mouse or even press a single key9 -
"The role: You will be designing and building responsive emails on a daily basis using HTML5/ CSS3/JavaScript"
Errrrrrrmmmm...5 -
The IT policy at my company is down right ridiculous. You’re required admin rights to fucking move desktop shortcuts to the trash, all chrome extensions and almost anything you download from the internet is a ‘virus’, good luck getting driver support for external devices.3
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If you're going to look for junior devs on facebook... make sure you don't try to be funny and write any kind of bullshit-code.. there is a f**king space in the function name! Dude....
Text says:
"Rieke Computersysteme is looking for you!
void send Application () { ... }"
10 -
Lol!
Mistakenly clicked on some old link in my bookmarks, fell on this. I still don't know what to think!
(Eat some JPEG, by the way :))
4 -
web dev agency makes a job ad that fits exactly my skill set.
*send an email in a good form with resume and everything*
No acceptance, no decline, no "we'll look at it", just nothing...
just fucking die already -_ -4 -
Don't be afraid to make mistakes. Making mistakes is the only way to learn from them and grow. F*ck sh*t up and build it back up again but better. Fall seven times stand up 8!
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So, i helped solving 168 bugs for this website. Ofcourse, doubting every step since i'm still new here. Yesterday there was a meeting with the directors. Appearently they where happy a graded the site with a 8.5.
I finished my education with a 6. Not taking credit for any of the above...4 -
Last week: "let's build this page this way!"
Me: styles page
One day later: "no, that's build the wrong way, let's build it this other way!"
-_-' -
So i already worked 40 hours this week and i have still 8 more hours to go.
Made a shift from 08:30 till 23:30 and wannabe lead had the guts to tell me i could work from home.
Maybe it's not a bad idea to leave the office.
And fucking quit1 -
So far i've been asked at least three times this week if i like it here.
I consider this a disadvantage...
7 -
Management proposed to work with external freelancers, to "pick up speed so we can release these new designs sooner". We agreed, but of course we (the home team) can't have time to review their work because we need to develop other new features and bugfixes and such...
Weeks later, turns out that their changes are largely incompatible with the work we have been doing on the main branch. We are now rebasing/rewriting huge chunks of their work, probably taking as much time as it would have cost us to develop the design ourselves in the first place.4 -
After ten years of working sh*t jobs I finally got the chance to study CompSci at a top university... All the kids look at me as if I've been programming for years, truth is I just study a lot because my scholarship requires me to get B+ or above.
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This pisses me off soooo fucking much.
"We're sowwy but we'll have to ask you to turn off your pretty little adblocker! We can't keep making money off of you by showing you stuff you don't want to see if you don't turn off your adblocker! But it's okay, who doesn't use an adblocker? Just turn it off for our site pleeeease"
Quit it with the quasi-friendly bullshit. If it's okay, why don't you fuck off and let me block whatever I want to block? It's ridiculous how many hoops I have to jump through just so I don't have to see ads on the internet. Even pi-hole doesn't help with this anymore. Now I need an Ad Blocker Blocker Blocker just so I don't have to wade through heaps of obnoxious ads every time I visit a page. It's so goddamn stupid.
10 -
We need help choosing a title for the devRant Community Programming Book.
The book is still needs a lot of work to do but you can already get an overview of the kind of content it will contain.
Please vote here:
https://github.com/devRant-Squad/...
If you have more suggestions, add them here:
https://github.com/devRant-Squad/...
Btw we are still searching for writers! If you have a programming language you love and know a lot about, you can come to this discord server and ask:
https://discord.gg/4AThF887 -
Finding fragile balance between “we need to create a programming language to solve this task elegantly and efficiently” and “yo dawg here’s some php, go get that shit together”
-
Didn't even ask for 2 sets, the devRant team is just awesome! Thanks!
On and @localhost, it seems like people are sending their setup, so here's my student one :)
1 -
Why do recruiters keep thinking they can contact me 5 months after i last spoke to them? Look at me LinkedIn. I have a job!2
-
Ooh. Here's a "deep" one.
For the self thought/online learners, at what point did you consider yourself an "actual" developer and felt ready to go out and apply for jobs and stuff?
And what challenges/reactions did you face?4 -
I have a new personal project that I hope I'll share with you guys one day. It just came to me. A fog simulation for a window manager such that it has fog behind the transparent console while you code and the fog goes in front when the terminal is locked. How about it?2
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(Saturday morning)
Me: I've never been so long without exercising (since before this, my first winter), I should get in shape now that this God forsaken weather is finally reaching livable levels.
(some time later at the gym)
Also me: You've always been in good shape, why stop with just chest, let's do some arms and shoulders.
(48 hours later, Monday morning)
I had to turn my whole torso to look if any car was coming while walking to the library, moved like terminator because of the massive neck muscle pain, suffered through the pain of setting up all my study material to the realize (just now) I can't even fucking look down to my notebook... Can I be more stupid?1 -
Didn't install linux for years now. Today, I have to and nothing changed about wifi drivers, at all ! Even the install process still sucks !
And they still ask to "sudo apt-get install fucking-wifi-driver" ?!?!?!
I don't have internet yet, that's the all point, damn it !22 -
Damn devrant just gave me a "helpful tip" but my anti-ad reflexes kicked and before I realized it was closed. Does someone knows what does it say?5
-
!!rant
I just hate job ads which have a pseudo-language (Java or C for ex) code snippet inviting you for an interview.
Oh my God they are so fucking LAME. I actually pass on these job offers.1 -
Every bloody time I respond to a comment, devRant asks me to add my 2 cents. I only have pence here, and there is not fucking coin slot!!!! 😡
I tried the lighting port, it doesn’t fit.
Is anyone else experiencing this pay wall?14 -
Another fun thing. This morning one of the first mails i read was a issue about a bug in our software.
This was a bug i mentioned months ago but there was nog evidence where i searched like mails chats or tickets.
If people would just listen to me this bug was solved months ago but back then i got a reaction like: "works over here" while i tested it on two different instances with buggy results each time. -
Just discovered Roccat Power-Grid!
It's so awesome and useful!
Mapped all Makros I use while programming to it.
I also have some CPU/RAM info and media buttons (play/pause/next/...).
You can even add website buttons. For example for Github or Stackoverflow!
Not sure if it's faster to use it but it's way cooler :)
Check it out!
Just search for it on Google/DuckDuckGo. -
ok, so first there were ads.
Then came adblock and the likes.
Then websites started implementing randomly generated strings.
Then came pi-hole.
Now some of the websites are using RNG + hosting ads on their domains...
(the order might not be very accurate, but you get my point)
So what now ?
I'm guessing that the next step for adblock will be to use AI to recognize these RNG strings, and then the websites will use AI to generate better strings (harder to distinguish if it is relevant content or an ad).
In other words - AI vs AI :D
what do you guys think ? :)4 -
Without any proper JS knowledge careeroptions are very limited... and i won't be able to pay my rent without a job :/3
-
The worst part of youtube is that you have to watch 8 minute ad with no skip button for 5 min video8
-
What are the most useful plugins for VIM depending on your usage ?
Note : Yeah yeah yeah, I know that there is VS Code and others, just keep it ...
9 -
Got my first job, 3rd year student from my country took me in to help making an app for a company in Texas... All the other guys are from 4th year or graduate school. Feeling nervous, let's hope I don't fuck up.2
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I was given 6 whole months to rewrite some old monolithic web app exactly 5 months ago today. Now I have to show my boss the progress I've made. How do I explain him that I wasted my time in this order:
1.- heavy procrastination
2.- try new frameworks to work with, pick one, start writing the app, regret and start over again using a different framework.
3.- devrant
4.- existencial crisis and self doubt.
Now all I have are a bunch of incomplete buggy modules and a mental breakdown.8 -
Fucking Browser autocorrect!
You type the same address a hundred times, every time hoping it’ll guess the address after the first.... second..... third.... character. No, it shows you a similarly named site that you went on months ago. End up having to type most of the domain name before it catches it.
Then, one day, you hastily mis-spell the address and press enter, now autocorrect keeps fucking directing you to there!!8 -
@HampusMa
What does that mean?
Noticed it while on another rant but didn’t want to hijack the topic. I’m genuinely curious.
19 -
100% accurate product description on Google…
Which color of the iPhone 8 do you prefer?
Silver looking as the Fujitsu ESPRIMO Desktop, or Space Gray looking as an HDD? 🤔
Without counting the "Oro Garanzia" (Gold Warranty) looking as Space Gray.
4 -
Err. I'm working on something this is a stupid question. But is there a way to save data and stuff without having to go into back end?
If not or if there is. What should I look into/learn to get it done without having to go too deep6 -
Developing a clothing shop and being bored. Adding clients like Napoleon Bonaparte with the comment that this person is missing a hand.
-
I was talking with my mom on messenger and right after the moment I told her to stop believing in advertisement and not clicking on everything on the net... I saw a job ad on Instagram
"*cool company from my home country* front end developer for 3000 - 5000euro/month based on experience"
(which is a pretty good salary there, the avg is around 900euro/month)
me: *clicks*2 -
Anyone else like... REALLY bad at algorithms and logic stuff?
I just hate them so much.
Tell me to build something and gg done. But all these tests for jobs freak me out.
Like. It probably ends up being something simple and when it's explained I know what to do but at first I just instantly shut down and can't think.5 -
So what exactly is it like working as a developer?
I'm still in the learning phase but I can't seem to picture what exactly it is you'll be doing daily if you get hired.
Is it like constant coding? But like, the site is already made and is huge.
Or is it like making new stuff? But then like, there's already a big company site.
It's what I wanna do but I honestly can't imagine how it will work different from doing it for yourself7 -
What's that? You committed the tmp/dist/cache field for something only YOU run locally and asked me to review it. Just GET OUT.1
-
That moment when you found out, the "digital PMs" and "digital art directors" who have NO FREAKING CLUE about the limitation of the web... promised the clients fantastical things... at ridiculous timelines... WITHOUT CONSULTING any of the devs... GARGHHHH
3 -
OMG... I want to thank my mother for changing my diapers for many years, my brother for all the games he no longer plays, my wife for actually making money, my plant for the awesome smell, God for maybe doing something (I guess), thanks @dfox, @trogus, and each one of you guys that deemed my rants worthy of your ++.
1 -
I learned C with a K&R copy a friend gave me years ago. Now at University we in CompSci get taught in Python the first year and Java next while the engineers start with C and (I'm guessing) move on to assembly later on.
This friend comes to me all worried because he has to submit the next day a working Reversi game for the console written in C. Turns out the game was divided among two labs and he failed to submit the first one.
The guy is smart but once a week or so, when we met to smoke a joint and relax with some other friends, he was always talking about how he would prefer something like law but that would be bad business back in Egypt.
Back to the game, I get completely into it. First hour checking all the instructions he was given, then reviewing the code he wrote and copied from Internet. We decide start from scratch since he doesn't really get what the code he copied do. It took us 10 hours only stopping to eat but we get all the specifications of both labs perfectly.
A week after that he comes to me: "my TA said your code is the ugliest shit he's ever seen but he gave me a perfect score because it passed all the tests". I'm getting better (the courses I'm taking help me a lot) but what really made me happy is that he solved the next lab by himself (Reversi wasn't the first time I helped him, only the first time he was absolutely lost). Now he actually gets excited about coding and even felt confident for his programming final.
No more talking about being a lawyer after those 10 hours, totally worth it.1 -
After 8 hours of carefully installing Gentoo in my laptop I ended up with a... Completely unusable OS. Guess I'll try again tomorrow, apparently I didn't set up the kernel with the appropriate drivers.2
-
Does anyone else feel like he is choking the device when holding a button to force reset/shutdown?
Or is it just me angry with my Asus notebook with Windows 10 that would keep the LED on after "shutdown"?3 -
We have a external demo this thursday. We still need to merge a lot of branches and somehow get a online environment working.
It's 30C and my motivation is dropping by the hour.
At least im not the one to actually have to demo this for people in suits giving you a hard time.
But there are a lot of responsibilities open and no one is taking a lead or having somekind of plan. -
Since i hard problems with a slow harddrive i've been asking for a SSD. It took 6 weeks for a SSD to arrive.
It has been laying on my desk for another 4, because busy projects etc.
Last friday i decided to install it. I have to do everything about the install myself. No IT support nothing.
I've been trying to install windows on the SSD For over a day now. And now im fucking done with it. FUCK THIS SHIT. FUCK THE SSD. FUCK THE FUCKING PROJECT AND FUCK THE FUCKING CLIENT. Goddamn morons around here.3 -
Tried an ad blocker for the first time yesterday. Well what do ya know? Websites I use will not let me access them unless I turn it off. I KNEW something like this would happen. When they were first coming out a few years ago, I said to myself "If everyone is going to be blocking ads, how will we be able to go to these sites for free?"
I expected the worst. I thought they'd put free websites behind a pay wall, much like ad-free mobile applications I would make. Thank GOD that didn't happen. This system is a lot more fair in my opinion. I'm just glad they don't do the same with popup-blockers. Then we would have an issue.
In all seriousness, as annoying as some websites are with their trashy, misleading, or fake ads, they (kinda) have to be there in order for devs to make money and for consumers to be somewhat happy. That is why I personally will not use ad blockers.6 -
So, i started at this company about 4 months ago. So far i mostly worked in existing project and legacy code.
We started a new project for a pretty big client, and i'm the one who's responsible for setting the project up. The last two days i've been struggling with database issues. Finally got the site running locally about an hour ago.
And now i am running into troubles because i don't know how to set up a project yet since i only worked in existing projects.
Great. Can't say i'm not challenged here! -
I keep posting that I need job and I appreciate the feedback but I feel just saying that makes it seem like I'm not trying.
Like. I legit don't know. Could it be my cv that's a dud? Thinking of paying a resume writing thing
Cause I'm actually trying hard af to learn new stuff as well keep doing what I'm good at.
I got one interview in a year and even then they didn't gimme the chance to show tech side. It's soo tilting.
I'm actually competent though inexperienced I think.
Any advice or questions please. I legit need to sort this out this year. Like its very important that I do.
Help.13 -
This is getting kind of annoying now. Everytime i am planned for a (small) project, there is less to no briefing and nobody has a clue what to do.
Then how the hell am i supposed to?2 -
It's bad enough that Facebook videos in my country have ads but some cunt actually had the genius idea to make the tagline for their ad "Un-skippable quality"
Not sure I can even be mad at how trolly that is 😭😂3 -
Don't you just love that moment when you see shit,
Flying.
In a bow.
Through the air.
And actually just starting, just starting, to hit the fan.
Three days before your deadline.
And it is crystal clear the project is gonna end up as a mess.
Total disaster.
But the best thing of all: it's not your fault.
So, you are actually celebrating the mess to come a little, and know that you can blame the guy who isn't trusting you as a new guy, and show him, with all his more years experience, he is the one who can't be trusted.1 -
I just finished my second semester of computer programming. I then say to myself : "Let's use my new knowledge to make the program I worked on for fun two years ago better and more efficient!".
It was a bad idea. -
Heads up, fellow tech nerds: if you're an Amazon Prime member and have ever wanted a Raspberry Pi, there's a good deal on a starter kit, 20% off for Prime Day! Search for "CanaKit Raspberry Pi 3 Complete Starter Kit".
I've always wanted to build a project with a Pi, and now mine's coming Friday! Build project suggestions?6 -
Those money whores of google at it again
https://9to5google.com/2019/05/...
I hereby invite all chrome users to firefox9 -
My coworker, Donnovan, has influenced me the most professionally. Showed me the ropes around HL7 when I had limited coding background. His philosophy of automating as much as possible has been my motto for over a decade, and I make sure I impart that to every new dev I train.2
-
Making an ad for web design.
Give me your puns to design something around so it isn't boring...
Go!4 -
Just received an email from a company i applied while searching for a new job. They sended me this little assigment to show my skills since they had the feeling i couldnt show them much.
(they browsed through 3 of my websites while i was there, including a check on the code)
It was a simple layout assigment. Just a responsive page with a hamburger menu (also mentioned during this interview)
It took me a couple of hours to create it and ive send it back in the hope of some positive feedback.
Feedback: assignment was pretty good but it show a lack of php experience. I was clearly more on the .NET side.
....
I just sended html, css and js files as requested. HOW THE F* DO YOU COME TO THIS CONCLUSION?!?!
Damn idiots, im glad i found people that actually do know how to hire people!2 -
Coworker during standup this morning: yeah i couldn't work saturday on the project because of VPN problems but i'll stay longer today.
Scrum master goes home.
Coworker, literally 8:10 hours later. Goes home.
He bugfixed another project for an hour and told me i had to work on this project instead of helping another client.
Meanwhile he's bragging about all the experience he has and telling he wants to be the lead dev.
I thought he started early but nope. First drank coffee for another 15 minutes.2 -
Yeah he was officially free today but he still managed to come a couple of hours. Fucking asshole go fix your fucking code damn idiot. This whole site is broken. Thanx mr wannabe a leaddev. Hope you crash with your damn racecar2
-
So, the wanna be lead FE dev came in late this morning. I asked him if everything worked out with his home. Turned out he didn't have an appointment for his home.
He decided to see a friend for breakfast.
Now... This guy is is going through a tough time with a girl but still... wtf. At least tell your coworkers about something like this. Just made up an excuse "for personal reasons".
No he just stays away and nobody knows how what or why. Like... wtf?
Anyway, he's here now. Surfing tech sites as usual. Instead of working on the project in Jira.
And ofcourse project won't be done by the end of the day
*sight*3 -
Wow! My rights to merge work is just revoked. This is fucking bullshit. Whenever i want to merge my work the project lead has to do it. And when he’s sick ill have to go to the fe lead, who is in meetings 24/7. Fucking great2
-
We have a nerf gun in the office here and i'm at the point that whenever i here a click, there is a *duck, hide and roll* part of me triggered. I just saw a guy opening a soda can when i noticed this1
-
So im new here and trying to find my way. There is one colleague who's been sick for a couple of days and just came back.
Note on the appearence of this person: big, tattooed bearded, but im not scared easily ;)
Trying to introduce myself: "Hi, let's shake hands: i'm [name]"
Colleague: "Are you sure about that?"
Yeah. Great week with awkard interactions so far!4 -
I like the settings on my phone as dark as the dungeons with Geralt and a torch or the awesomely dumb flashlight from Doom 3.12
-
Some developers just don't put close buttons in some annoying and space-consuming stuff. Then it is inspector panel to the rescue!
5 -
My planning says i’m working on project A and B this week. Scrummaster (who also makes the planning) says i’m working on project C and D.
So much for the reliability of planning here. -
Contractmeeting in 1,5 hour. Its either permanent or i'm 'kicked out'. Option two would be the 4th time already. Whatever the outcome, i'll be ok!3
-
Coworker is trying to make me look bad by posting a piece of code in the group chat...
Nobody reacts.
Winning1 -
There is a hack-a-ton here till 23:00. The new guy i am i was thinking of staying and see where i can help...
Last couple of days i've been working on a project (my first real one yay) and at first i got lots of help to get me started.
Right now im completely stuck and everybody is busy here. No help anymore. Fml
The weather is hell atm here in Holland so, even thought i don't feel like staying anymore i think i still stay, and see if i can learn something new.1 -
Here's a question that I still don't know how to respond.
What's the expected salary of a front end developer?
In euros please.6 -
I was in a meeting the other day which started with a introducing of the members and a basic explanation about scrum.
The meeting ended with the note form the client that the project was absolutely not allowed to cost more then X.
After the meeting a coworker asked who explained scrum to the client. And it was explained twice by two different people. -
Couple of years ago i was working on a custom webshop with a third party designer and a manager. The manager didnt do his job right in my eyes. Didn't have overview of the tasks and was way too busy/lazy/stressed whatever.
Eventually i could go figure things out with the designer myself because he wanted some crazy menu structure.
So crazy i knew for sure that the usability wouldn't come to good.
Eventually deadline was past due and the projectmanager got me fired.
While back the brand i made the shop for went bankrupt.
What comes around gets around eventually.2 -
We're at that part in the project where we either keep sinking money into it, or cut or losses and go with another project. Sigh.1
-
I was already done with the company that couldn't make up their mind about JS. I got a mail:
They're stopping the procedure because they're looking for someone that also enjoys coding in their spare time. In other words: work 80 hours a week. -
is it just me or
<job ad>
...
min 1 year experience with web dev
min 5 years experience with web dev in JS
...
</job ad>
does not make much sense4 -
Sharing is caring, and continuing the streak, I have 3 invites to enki with the code: ASABE108
Enjoy :)4 -
Started my very first (summer) job as an IT agent in customer service for my city less than two weeks ago and finally moving out from the formations to answer the phone alone.
I must've listened to around 30 calls and already there's stories I could make tales of.
I now understand the job of customer service. -
This guy! I have a week off and he decides to rewrite the videos and video popups in this site.
He made it all so general that every video is loaded in every page AND auto plays.
Whenever a user is visiting his or her orders it plays all thos videos simulteously while not showing any video.
This guy.... -
Out of curiosity, how many years of PROFESSIONAL experience do people have on here. I’m assuming it’s quite diverse but skewed towards those at junior to mid-level for some reason. Just put a number down. I’ll start.
046 -
Couple of days ago i heard that the wannaB lead is going to leave us. I asked here if anyone could please fire the guy and... They actually kinda fired him...
The guy has serious skills but didn't live up to his promises.
I wonder who's next... -
I have always had the fantasy to build a function in my developments that upon start would check if my user still is enabled in the Active Directory, and if not then shut down the application. Never done it... yet.
-
Ayy. It's time. Someone wants to hire me to make a site for them...
How much do I charge? 😭. They also said they want it as an exclusive design that I can't do for anyone else. It's one of my first proper ones so its basically my baby
But yeah. How much is appropriate?
Do bare in mind that I'm broke af 😂. Suggestions in GBP please6 -
We devs are installing adblockers. Meanwhile, Google shareholders are clicking all ads to increase Google's revenue...
-
Debating whether to be the guy that posts deep slash depressing shit on here. Or let my other personality of a meme Lord handle my devRant3
-
Hello council of elders.. or should I say "console"? Heh? Heh? I've been up for a long time sorry.
Anyway. I've started learning framework stuff. Angular right now. Been long overdue tbh. And I found a free course on udemy and followed it. It's cool and everything but I gotta ask...
Why can't I just use vanilla js and everything from scratch? I'm not sure if its the course I'm using (I'd appreciate more resources. Thanks) but I feel like it's a lot of effort. Is there something I'm missing or haven't learned yet?
It might sound stupid please let me know why it's better to use that than regular methods. Apparently it's meant to make stuff easier but I feel like it's just a lot linking files and making various things in different places.
Also. Other stupid question which might just be cause of the course but like... Is it mostly just for manipulating json??
Thanks. More questions to come soon!!4 -
Can someone-not me- make a way to go lower than the lowest brightness setting on my phone?
Thanks.
From me and my shut in photophobic eyes5 -
Generally have great experience with our management.
I work at a scale-up, so I've had some run-ins with the founder shifting priorities too often in the early days, but he's got enough notion of tech to understand when we're telling about the why(not)s of what we can and can't do
A while back we got a product owner/manager/scrum master and he's great too. I've had times when he put pressure on making deadlines when it was really not helping, but overall great guy with a lot of empathy and respect for his team.
But recently I've been starting to feel like we (the dev team) are getting more and more excluded from the decision-making process of the features & designs that we're going to be working on. We used to have a say in what we felt like was a good idea for a feature or a design, but it feels to me like we don't get asked that question any more of late...
Not sure if I'm imagining it, or overreacting to a logical (possibly positive?) evolution in our development workflow... -
Week before this i had to assign a task for a mailing to a coworker of mine. So i handed him the documentation (partly on paper).
He finished his part and now i need to continue the works.
I asked him the documentation. He told me he shredded it and threw it away. Thanks coworker. You are being useless like never before.1 -
I've been asked to write a job ad for a frontend developer, as I have never don that, what would you write in there? And what are usual salaries for frontend devs? Also what would you ask them in an interview? What kind of coding challenges would you give them? Also we're not looking for a "code monkey" only but that person should also be responsible for jow everything looks (like the design and UI/UX of the site). How would you call that position? I've for now put "Frontend UI/UX Web-Developer" there.2
-
That was jobinterview #1. Where actually more looking for someone with design experience. Ow well, didn't click anyway. The recruiter could've known this :/1
-
Yay, starting a new job this wednesday! Really stoked! But, will ofcourse also let the option open for this global organization which will interview me tomorrow. To be honest with you: i don't feel worthy enough working for this big multinational thats active in 75 countries.
-
So, a new coworker started here about two months ago. He's all about talking but the actions aren't very fast.
I looked at my Pull Request and this guy is writing comments for 5. Where the hell did he get the balls from? Seriously!
Please stand next to the designer so i can slap both of you bitches. -
Stayed for the hack-a-ton last night. Had so much fun! And everybody actually came up with a working product in a couple of hours. Amazing :).
Too bad the initiator of the whole thing went home early. Doesn't really show interest. -
Wondering: What does define a BIG project for you?
I just noticed we're approaching the deadline and there are at least 6000 lines of css. Not my personal biggest so far in terms of lines. I think i worked on projects with 10.000 lines9 -
Mansplaining stories are my favorite thing on the internet right now tbh
Anyone got any good ones?7 -
Im put on this project.. But i don’t feel taken seriously.
Lead dev says: go make some html templates. Meanwhile, he is building the exact same thing in the cms.
Right, so what is my work worth then? Nothing -
We have a new official and probably for now final Lead Developer.
Asking questions like: What happens after is push code to bitbucket? -_-‘
Next time i’ll answer that the building will explode.1 -
So, we should be done with the redesign project for this site and a while back we got feedback from the client.
Now getting feedback isn't a bad thing, until you get 6 pages of feedback.
6 pages of feedback. It took me several hours to plow through it and check everything.
That was three weeks ago. They now want me to check the entire fucking list again, and then some more.
SERIOUSLY?!
When i started hete i was told that this was one of the easiest clients the company had. Because they see us as the experts. Haha.
Appearently not anymore.2 -
Finally the site is live. Today all stress was gone again. Still a pity that i have 7 pull requests out of 10.
-
Paycheck currently isn't compensating the current workload anymore.
I feel like we are missing 10 couple of hands while only three people are on vacation1 -
Those of you who wants the bleeding edge of technology, here's the one for YouTube:
https://youtu.be/addme/...
This unlocks the sharing tab on YouTube's mobile app, like in the screenshot below. Make sure you are on your mobile device.
Enjoy sharing! :D
//Oh right, it's supposed to be a rant -
Gosh I hate when I ain't in the new technologic stuff already 'ghah 😡 😋
1 -
Just enrolled myself in Andrew Ng's Machine Learning course at Coursera for the summer, is it a good place to start? Any recommendations?
-
Wanted to remove a underline from links that was seemly coming from a default cmd css.
Even with !important it wasn't working. Why? Why wasn't it just working?
30m later i found out i selected text-underline instead of decoration. -_-'
After 8 years i feel so stupid, i should just like i should apply at mcDonalds and just start flippin burgers...1 -
Getting feedback from a client like: "on mobile left is right and right is left"
Wtf am i supposed to make out of this1 -
Jeej first project. Read: 101 FE bugs to fix. In code i've never seen before. With bare minimum support. Though day. First steps with Gulp are set. yay1
-
!rant
Anyone else wonder how they got into the kind of the coding they're in?
Like, I wanted to make plugins for music software and DAWs and now I do front end web...
I don't even know what fucking language is used for something like that -
When a job applicant on an assigment is asking me questions about the assigment i don’t have much hope for him/her... Maybe better next time
-
So, been working for almost 2 weeks now at the new job. Worked fairly much on one of their sites and today they have a meeting with the client regarding this site. Ofcourse now is the moment for this site to be f'd up. OFCOURSE!
-
As a not-freelancer, whats the amount of companies you worked for?
This was #4 and im beginning to doubt myself. Maybe i should do start some other career or something.2 -
IE Edge is supposed to be the browser to hate as a dev. However over here for my new temporary PC it isnt installed at all. Windows 10 WTF?! I need this shitty browser for test purposes1
-
Neither one of them really *get* what I do, but mom likes to tell me his much she hates whatever program she uses at work as if I control the dev timeline.
-
Any of you guys know about Feathers UI ? Based on Google Trends, I'll assume that you don't. But if you do please let me know
-
I keep getting emails from people I don't know that are like conversations, leading me to believe they aren't sent to the rightful owner. Most of the time, I see the email has uppercase at some places (when mine doesn't).
I just wish the companies could put a mark somewhere in their page when entering an uppercase email that mentions the fact that it doesn't change shit, getting really annoyed from receiving these mails not directed to me 😒 -
This is the 4th day at my new job. Just got a call from Unilever. Im invited for a second interview there. First world problems of a developer. What job to choose :/
-
That moment when you are struggling for hours to get your validation working, and in the end it's just a name that had to be turned into an id -_-
-
Bloody softlayer sending notifications about expected downtime on "IMS services" (which could mean any of a great number of things), without specifying what it is, what it does or to what services or regions it is related...
Grmbl, what use is there to get a notification about unexpected maintenance if you can't even make out if you'll be affected or not! -
Auto build is not working. I have to stop and build and start the app again everytime I change a line... I want to kill myself.
-
It's almost a week later since i got the note i'm not welcome anymore soon in my current company.
After 6 days i figured out a reason other then: "the fe/be tranfer doesnt go well". I just don't want to blame be-guy because he was busy as hell with at least three projects at the same time.1 -
Aaaand going through recruiter hell again! Not even 1 hour later i already receveid 10 phonecalls.3
-
I have to learn to work with this new cms. And me and a coworker have been struggling with custom faq templates. We told the lead dev multiple times we need help to get this to work.
Still no help.
Im gonna put this on him in the demo. -
Semi-rant
Saw an ad that required 8+ years experience in Swift.. Didn't Swift come out like... 4 years ago? Can these recruiters have a sense of what they're doing and the area they're in please. Not just this one, but many others as well.1 -
This person has never heard of the saying that there is no 'I' in team. He just focuses on the code not communicating whatsoever. F*CKtard
Meanwhile i'm trying to fix everything that broke down since yesterday 00:00.
Meanwhile other coworkers are also screaming their project is on fire...
should i quit?2 -
Anybody else struggeling with the amount of work? Either it's crazy busy or crazy silent. What do you do in each case?2
-
Do you know how epic coding sessions van become when you turn on classic radio on Spotify and LOTR comes along?
-
Scrolling numbers in Spotify on a iPad while i was listening on the other side of the office while rebooting phone etc.
Best i can do is sticking a stickynote under a mouse. Fun for 0,5 sec -
Let's start the week fresh and reboot the PC with some updates. Also because of the while WannaCry drama.
...
Ok after 10 minutes of 'waiting for profile service' i just pressed the button. Time is precious!
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