Saw a job posting at subway in Chicago. Need a job ?

"I'm sure I can implement this very easily, it's not much work"
*takes 10 days*

Fact! 😑

Plan before you start a project (write pseudocode, draw a small diagram, research other implementations, etc). Without a plan, those projects are usually the ones that turn out unfinished.

Hey guys...this is my current Ubuntu GNOME desktop . What do you guys think ???

Stranger: "what are you doing?"
Me:"I'm developing a WPF app for a personal project"
Stranger:"So it's for Windows...I prefer Linux because...blah blah"
Me: -.-

Sometimes I feel like Linux users are the Vegans of the tech world...

Let's clarify:
* Github is not Git
* Android is not Java
* Unit test is not TDD
* Java is not OOP
* Docker is not Devops
* Jenkins is not CI
* Agile is not institutionalised total chaos
* Developer is not Printer Support

*Me and my GF who works for CIA*

Me: Send nudes
GF: Whose do you want ?

General advice: If you're the smartest person in the room, you're in the wrong room.

- Knock, knock

- An async function

- Who's there?

"Knock Knock"

"Who's there?" 

"Knock Knock"

"Who's there?" 

"Knock Knock"

"Who's there?" 

- DoS Attack

What devrant taught me:

Everyone hates java
Everyone hates php
Everyone hates spaces
Everyone hates tabs
Everyone hates vim
Everyone hates windows
Everyone hates linux
Everyone hates clients
Everyone hates PMs
Everyone hates every language they're not working with
Everyone loves devrant 😊

"Please disable AdBlock to view the content."

No. I'll just leave. Bye.

"So, why do you want to work at our office in mexico?"
"I want to be a señor developer."

My girlfriend dumped me after I named a class after her. She felt I treated her like an object.

When a hiring manager wants 5+ years experience in Swift.

Swift release date = June 2, 2014

😂👍🖕

"A different error message! Finally some progress!"

A Programmer nurse 😂😁

Senior developer fixing an issue

received a bug report from a client on a mobile app.

title: bug on information page.
description: all text field make first​ letter capital.

*what! this is your keyboard, stupid!

after he didn't understand, I made a text change listener, and make the first letter lowercase, he is happy. heheh 😨

I remember the day when my room was messed up and my desktop icons were organized.
But now, my desktop icons are messed up and also my room is.

shit

Gary's a prick