Let us watch some Netflix on Jimmys portfolio...

"I know more coding" - Friend

Attached image is one of his "websites" that he put up for download

There was a sales manager who was raked with overseeing me and another dev finish a last minute request project. He said at one point to the other dev that he was mad at developers because we understood something that he would never understand.

This same manager would often sit in on estimation meetings and constantly say that we were estimating too high and needed to come up with faster solutions. When we would offer him with caveats of possible technical debt or unintended side-effects/performance issues, he'd want us to go with that solution. He would then complain that we were always wanting to work on technical debt and that our application was slow. He would also ask for very high level estimates for large, unscoped features/apps without any meaningful level of detail, then hold us to the high-level estimated date even after revealing additional features previously unmentioned.

We learned to never compromise on the right solution and to push back hard on dates without proper scoping. They didn't learn, so I and most of the good devs left.

girl: Why is your laptop heavier than mine?
me: I have more files than yours
girl: oh! it's true, you and movies eh.
me: laughing inside... hehehe

This is way too true.

when you are a newbie on devRant and get flak for reposting something unknowingly

I can't find my hotel room...

Got to love Microsoft's error messages.

"Yes....and I'm supposed to do what?"

Oh yeah 🙌🏼

Nothing makes me sicker than a programmer who chooses the light theme rather than dark

*You can't make this shit up*

Recruiter: Hi, I saw your profile on LinkedIn and I think I have a great programmer opportunity for you today! Can you tell me a little bit about your experience?

Me: Sure, I mostly work with JavaScript and C# and have several years of experience in designing, developing, and deploying enterprise-level applications in production environments.

Recruiter: Hmm, um OK. Have you ever created programs using InDesign or Microsoft Word?

Me: Excuse me?

Recruiter: You know, anything like pamphlets or event brochures?

Me: Are you talking about physical paper programs such as those that accompany events/conferences?!

Recruiter: Yes! What else would I be taking about?

Me: I'm in the software development industry, so I thought you were talking about programming in that context.

Recruiter: Oh no! Those positions are for the men, sweety. I mean, I wouldn't expect any women to know that other techy stuff...

*Hangs up*

“ Java is to JavaScript what Car is to Carpet. ” - Chris Heilmann

Error handling done properly.

No Jack, not now... I'm busy.

Schrödinger's code:

Its both working and crashing until you run it.

When the deadline is too close you can't waste time on toasting your bread

When you find a problem you're trying to solve on stack overflow and it has no answers

Xcode ✅
Apple Development Subscription ✅
Spare time ✅
Ideas for apps ❌

I would have to say the first start-up I worked with had the worst recruiters. Albeit they were seniors of mine, and not full fledged professionals, but this was pretty ridiculous.

So at the interview(which I won by winning a hackathon in college), they asked me the standard questions about my current knowledge and what I hope to achieve in the company. When they asked me my tech questions, one program that they thought was tough, I solved in 2 minutes. I was interviewing with 3 other people whom hadn't gotten the answer. Naturally I doubt myself due to the lack of answers being produced. The recruiters themselves didnt understand my answer initially. So much so that they were convinced I was wrong(at this time the others were coming up with, and submitting their answers, which the recruiters naturally expected from us). So to give me the benefit of the doubt, they whip out a laptop to run my code, and guess what? It worked, and had NOTICABLY lesser computation speed.

Needless to say I got the job, but the look on my recruiters' faces after exclaiming I was wrong, then they themselves being proven wrong? Priceless. xD

I'm already spending more time on devRant than on Twitter! Crazy... The level of addiction reminds me of that when I started to use Instagram a few years ago.

My group set up a Linux Dev server. We got hacked by Chinese hackers. We set it up again but even more secure with only people inside the uni can access it. We got hacked again.Turns out one of the modules in a container was using an outdated CentOS version. P.S The malicious file on the server was called kk.love.

That moment when you try a new language and ItsWorkingException is throw 🤓📏📐