At the ending part of the interview, I asked a final question to the HR.

Me: "So, what language is mostly used here?"

HR: "Since we're dealing with customers from different countries, English."

Not me, but a colleague of mine ordered 10,000 pens with <company>.com printed on them - but our company had a .org address.

Gillette Excel

USB sounds like a backup in case the USA fails

Shouldn't a friend class be called a friends-with-benefits class, since it can touch their private members? 🤔🤔🤔

"If Java had true garbage collection, most programs would delete themselves upon execution." - Robert Sewell

DevRant

The man behind the legend!

When you walk in the room for your interview and you see a whiteboard on the wall

So I just got one of those pop ups saying YOUR COMPUTER HAS BEEN HACKED.

I decided to call the number, while firing up a Linux virtual machine, running Linux Mint. I customized the home button to look like the Windows start menu logo, and proceeded to let that scammer connect to it.

He was so confused, considering the script he was reading off of was meant for windows. He opened up terminal, and started typing in "tree" and told me that's how many viruses I have.

😂😂😂

"Oh, you're a developer? Then you cannot fix my PC", said no relative ever.

Why are Mexican IT projects so expensive? ... Because there are only Señor Consultants available 😂

Co-worker: "Should we keep this server up and running?"
Me: "Hmmm…"
C: "Do we have any other uses for it than the dedicated wiki?"
M: "Not really, and maybe it's time to move to the centralised platform Corporate™ introduced. Have we checked if anyone is using the server?"
C: "Good point, let me see…"
C: "… oh it's been down for last two weeks since the power outage."
M: "I think that answers the question. Let's leave it like this for a month more and if no one complains we can announce it dead"

Ok so 10 yrs ago:-

Professor: Make this web front-end with blah blah blah pages.

*I create the thing and submit it*

<Next lecture i come in class and the projector is showing my website>

<I get excited that im bout to be praised for my work infront of whole class>

<I grab a seat>

Professor: I had high hopes from you. I did not expect PLAGRISM from YOU.

Me: Wwwwwwhaaaaaaaaaat the faaaaaaaaaaaaq??? Where is it which part????

Professor: Ive seen "lorem Ispem" before somewhere else. This is fucking plagrism.

<I sat 15 mins in disbelief>
<Got out of class>
<Dropped out of the course>

......

Right now someone at Google is coding something useless for us to laugh at on April Fools.

Typical code comment

F*CKING DESIGNERS.

Stop sending me your freaking PNG. Don't even dare to FREAKIN' make me use Chrome DevTools to get your FREAKIN' color our of your FREAKIN' PNG.

Give me all your colors in FREAKIN' hex, rgba, or whatever you want.

Give me all the fonts you used.

Give me all the sizes, is it percentage-based? Pixels based? Donuts-based?

I don't give a damn that you think you went responsive-first. Show me the damn responsive mockups. Not just the desktop sized with a note: "Don't worry mate, I made so that it all goes well when responsive".

Oh god. Oh god.

I'm not an artist, I give zero shit about how great it looks.

I'm a programming poet, I want to write code without having to open (or download it first through torrent) the damn photoshop, sketch, or whatever you use.

They take freakin' months to dump a mockup and we have days to make it happen. The pain.

The pain is strong with those damn designers.

Fuck.

If Rammstein did code :D

My room mate works in a data analytics company with his girlfriend. I always wonder what they do in office as they spend on an average 12-14 hours.
Yesterday we were having dinner and his girlfriend said "now we are working in D3"
Having used D3 for a small project in college I was going to ask more about it.
Her next sentence was "It's a language. Like html"
I did not say a world. Just nodded.

When you have fixed a bug and its time to open champagne

when your code is a mess but everything work out in the end

Well he did the right thing

Most people.
"Dance like no one is looking"

Me.
"Sudo like you have backups"