Let's make a JavaScript framework and call it Vanilla.js just to fuck with everybody.

working on legacy code and saw this:

@records = unpublished_collection.published

Wait, what?

So this just came up...

The superhuman feeling of going back to your code after a week and it all makes perfect sense, the variable names are intuitive, the doc strings are comprehensive, and the general codebase structure is sensible.

Hey i want to put one of this stickers on my laptop do you have suggestions ?

Angular Y U du dis to me

Fuck today was weird.

Today I received almost half a million on my bank account. 😯

Someone changed the ancient cryptic billing system. My user account at work has id 32 in the database, and the dev referenced the size of the creditor id instead of the of the value of the ids itself, and they're u32 ints... So ALL the money moving through our platform was accidentally transferred to my associated bank account.

For all the unit tests we have, this bug tumbled right through.

And no one at finances thought a transfer that big, to a backend dev they know by name, was suspicious — with almost no money going to other creditors...

That worries me a bit. The fact that this shit can happen, even at high test coverage, just because someone mindlessly did a wrong autocomplete or something.

Of course I will send it back... after two weeks and a few hundred € of interest.

Svg files don't work with Edge
*facepalm*

Be a real man an buy a binary keyboard like me.

Pros:
You become an absolute god.

Cons:
None

I do like Windows, it is a quite good OS nowadays, but for FUCK SAKE, what does it take to fix that CLUSTER FUCK that you call search? You don't have enough people MS or what? Just show me the BLOODY ITEMS that actually contain the words that I typed in!!! While you are at it WOULD YOU MIND LEAVING ME THE FUCK ALONE WITH THE FUCKING WEB RESULTS???

The truth is, I don't give two shits if you're a girl, woman, man, black, white, yellow striped with pink polkadots or a transgenderfluid 2headed Ogre kin married to a nuclear penguin from mars- the fact is, what I need you to be is professional. So shut your yapping about your personal shit and get to fecking work.

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

My friend: After a week of coding finally added 500 lines, now i have 1000,I'm so proud . How is your project going?
Me:

Hallucinations of my father that keep taking control of my psyche and making me hack things I don't remember or shooting me in the head to break down my sanity.

Devrant

You know shits getting real when google wants to translate the stackoverflow page!

If Programming Languages Were Girls:

Java: Your current girlfriend, you've been going steady for a while now. Things are okay.

Kotlin: The girl Java finds you cheating on, she's just amazing, and you wish you'd met her sooner.

Visual Basic: The girl you accidentally started a relationship with because you didn't know how to say no. But quickly realised your mistake and regretted it.

JavaScript: A childhood friend you occasionally hook up with. But you could never settle for a relationship with them.

Python: A bossy, manipulative girl who quickly turned things sour. But everyone else loves her because of her huge libraries.
-----------------------------------------------------
My and a co worker were joking the other day about what programming languages would be like if they were girls. This is what we came up with (Original inspiration: the Distracted Boyfriend meme (Feel free to add your own!)).

They recording what i'm typing ....aaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!

‎100% reliable test for HTML5

I was going to wait out hurricane Harvey by programming, but i Just realized my house is about to flood.

Oh joy.

STOP👏MAKING👏ASYNC👏CALLS👏FREEZE👏THE👏GUI👏THAT👏IS👏THE👏POINT👏OF👏ASYNC👏

Current me