My biggest dev blunder. I haven't told a single soul about this, until now.

👻👻👻👻👻👻

So, I was working as a full stack dev at a small consulting company. By this time I had about 3 years of experience and started to get pretty comfortable with my tools and the systems I worked with.

I was the person in charge of a system dealing with interactions between people in different roles. Some of this data could be sensitive in nature and users had a legal right to have data permanently removed from our system. In this case it meant remoting into the production database server and manually issuing DELETE statements against the db. Ugh.

As soon as my brain finishes processing the request to venture into that binary minefield and perform rocket surgery on that cursed database my sympathetic nervous system goes into high alert, palms sweaty. Mom's spaghetti.

Alright. Let's do this the safe way. I write the statements needed and do a test run on my machine. Works like a charm 😎

Time to get this over with. I remote into the server. I paste the code into Microsoft SQL Server Management Studio. I read through the code again and again and again. It's solid. I hit run.

....

Wait. I ran it?

....

With the IDs from my local run?

...

I stare at the confirmation message: "Nice job dude, you just deleted some stuff. Cool. See ya. - Your old pal SQL Server".

What did I just delete? What ramifications will this have? Am I sweating? My life is over. Fuck! Think, think, think.

You're a professional. Handle it like one, goddammit.

I think about doing a rollback but the server dudes are even more incompetent than me and we'd lose all the transactions that occurred after my little slip. No, that won't fly.

I do the only sensible thing: I run the statements again with the correct IDs, disconnect my remote session, and BOTTLE THAT SHIT UP FOREVER.

I tell no one. The next few days I await some kind of bug report or maybe a SWAT team. Days pass. Nothing. My anxiety slowly dissipates. That fateful day fades into oblivion and I feel confident my secret will die with me. Cool ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

my team mate thinks that function name should be descriptive so you can understand what It will do.
Here are the examples of functions he created:

createArrayOfConsentChangedEventObjectForAConsentForAllDataProcessorsWithoutNameInEvent()

createArrayOfConsentChangedEventObjectForAConsentForAllDataProcessorsWithNameInEvent()

createAndPushConsentChangedEventWithAndWithoutNameForAParticularConsent()

I was supposed to review his code but this names are so annoying that I gave up on reviewing and just passed his code since functionalities were working as expected. -_-

Am I the only one who gets annoyed by long function names?

I'll admit - I come from a WordPress background of almost 9 years in the making. I guess I can justify it because of all of the sites I created using it, it was the best that it could be on WP. Fast, efficient, custom - none of that off-the-shelf themeforest crap. I created everything custom. I actually knew what was going on behind the scenes of WP.

And then a buddy of mine and I had an idea for a new company/software project. I was smart enough to know that WP was not the foundation for this, so I did some NodeJS/Express tutorials. Started learning React, and really getting into the Javascript world.

And now I'm wondering WHY IN THE ABSOLUTE FUCK I ever bothered trying to become an expert in WP. It's the largest use of PHP in the fucking world and it doesn't even have native composer support. And by the time you actually get your project set up using composer you have to add a fucking mirror of the wordpress.org plugin repo to get anything to work. It's 2018 and you'd think that WP and composer would have all of this shit figured out by now.

And don't get me started on git - as soon as you have more than 1 person working on a WP site, I hope you have hourly backups of your DB because someones work will get overwritten. So you all either need to work on the same staging area of work around each other by pushing/pulling the DB and schedule your workflows.

I guess WP CLI and the REST API are a step in the right direction, but the foundation of everything is just so fucked up.

I don't feel like I've wasted my web dev career, but I definitely wish I had started down this path a lot earlier. I guess you don't know what you don't know. Thanks for reading!

Laptop battery hack.
9 more lipos for moi :D

Lost the stressball... 😭😭😭
Wish me luck to find it again 😪

Stupid shitheads among the web designers, fucking listen up. Your fucking design is not the point of websites - the content is. You are not supposed to shove the content away to have your moron design shine in its purest debility.

Yeah I know, white space minimalism yadda yadda, clean interface - and you dumbasses just remove functionality to simulate a clean interface, to the point of using hamburger fuckups on desktop. Pull your heads out of your asses, that's not how to design an interface! Not to mention that you idiots still guzzle through the megabytes and dozens of domain lookups for your chickenshit minimalism.

While we're at it, not everyone is 20 years old like you youngsters - you won't believe it, but there is life beyond 40, and while such age is unthinkable to you because you are so dumb that you will hardly reach that age anyway, others on this planet have managed to get there. No 20/20 laser sight, you know.

Fuck you with your light grey thin fonts on white background because it looks "clean", it just SUCKS you wankers. Fuck you with your stupid ghost buttons that don't even look like a button. You know how to operate the shit you made, but reality check here, users spend most of their time on fucking other websites than on the abomination you have designed!

Get that into the shit bubble that you call your brain and read WCAG 2.1! That's not only for disabled people, but everyone will be able to use that shit better!

Me Vs a PHP teacher

Him:
And to do login, we just do SELECT username WHERE password = (userinput)

Me:
Really? Checking raw userinput against plaintext password?

Him:
There is no point in doing it securely here because if they want, the students can go take a seperate course on security

Me:
So no point in teaching students that they should write their code secure by default and just leave it as a afterthought?

Him:
Yes, because this is how i have always done it

Me:
———

Him:
Okay, time for a break
*leaves room*

Me:
*Uses the break to teach all students about sql injection, password hash and salt, rainbow tables and user input sanitizing*

Him:
*comes back*

Students to teacher:
He's right, if you dont teach us to code securely by default, we are likely to end up causing a data leak or be hacked, if you dont teach us properly we have no point coming here

Me:
*Smiles at the teacher with a face that says: Pwnd*

Him:
Alright then, tell me whats wrong in my code

I was so proud that i helped the class understand secure by default principles

Friend had a Cryptominer add blocker on his browser.
His PC was slow as fuck.
Guess what ? The blocker was a cryptominer.

Got this today from my gf (only one part of birthday invitation card).
So cuuuuute 😍
English: "I'm 18, will I get something now?"

Every second I’m spending on this iPhone is getting me more annoyed.

I’m about to fucking compromise and get a non-lineage phone but At least a rootable one because I want or throw this piece of shit away as soon as possible.

I wouldn’t even pay 1 euro for an iOS device.

I told myself I’d go for an iPhone for a month or so but I’ll be looking for an extremely cheap android phone because I can’t bare working with this thing for much longer.

No offense to anyone and this is a personal opinion.

Fuck.

Found this on Reddit!
Makes sense!

I would encourage every one of you to support the Tor project in dark times like this

version control...

NEED HELP

An ant has entered my monitor and running all over the screen from inside. It's super irritating.
How can I get it out?

Lemme start a new era....

ARRAYS START AT TWO

How to prevent people from learning to code

Fun fact: If you type "jquery is shit" into DuckDuckGo, the third result is devRant.
More than that: Whenever something about programming is combined with "shit", "fuck" etc., it's very likely that you will eventually end up at devRant.
That's amusing.

Originally from : https://redd.it/8nvy7d

Many can relate. 🤔

Bought my first rubber duck today. Named her recursion 😍😍😍

"Don't give your 100%. Never. Once you gave, managers will start expecting more than that." - My mentor.

Totally agree...

"WiFi is better than Ethernet because the air is bigger so it can hold more internet."

Yes, and horse-drawn carriages are better than cars because they have bigger wheels.

Bittersweet made it to germanys biggest imageboard. Satisfying 280'th upvote

GDPR done right. 😂😂

That fortune cookie is definity meant for programmers.

More 💰, less 🐂💩. Or just a quiet life. The obvious, really.

I deleted my Facebook so now you guys have to like the photo I just took.

Ohhh and have a great fuckin' weekend, you fucks.

React 16.3 is released today and I still never used in a project.