Why did the chicken cross the road?

Assembler Chicken: First, it builds the road ......

C Chicken: It crosses the road without looking both ways.

C++ Chicken: The chicken wouldn't have to cross the road, you' d simply refer to him on the other side.

COBOL Chicken: 0001-CHICKEN-CROSSING.
IF NO-MORE-VEHICLES
THEN PERFORM 0010-CROSS-THE-ROAD
VARYING STEPS FROM 1 BY 1 UNTIL
ON-THE-OTHER-SIDE
ELSE
GO TO 0001-CHICKEN-CROSSING

Cray Chicken: Crosses faster than any other chicken, but if you don't dip it in liquid nitrogen first, it arrives on the other side frazzled.

Delphi Chicken: The chicken is dragged across the road and dropped on the other side.

Gopher Chicken: Tried to run but got beaten by the Web chicken.

Intel Pentium Chicken: The chicken crossed 4.9999978 times.

Iomega Chicken: The chicken should have ' backed up' before crossing.

Java Chicken: If your road needs to be crossed by a chicken, then the server will download one to the other side. (Of course, those are chicklets.) See also WMI Monitor.

Linux Chicken: Don't you *dare* try to cross the road the same way we do!

Mac Chicken: No reasonable chicken owner would want a chicken to cross the road, so there's no way to tell it how to cross the road.

Newton Chicken: Can't cluck, can't fly, and can't lay eggs, but you can carry it across the road in your pocket.

OOP Chicken: It doesn't need to cross the road, it just sends a message.

OS/2 Chicken: It crossed the road in style years ago, but it was so quiet that nobody noticed.

Microsoft's Chicken: It's already on both sides of the road. What's more its just bought the road.

Windows 95 Chicken: You see different coloured feathers while it crosses, but when you cook it still tastes like........ chicken.

Quantum Logic Chicken: The chicken is distributed probabilistically on all sides of the road until you observe it on the side of your choice.

VB Chicken: USHighways! <TheRoad.cross> (aChicken)

XP Chicken Jumps out onto the road, turns right, and just keeps on running.

The Longhorn Chicken had an identity crisis and is now calling itself Vista.

The Vista Chicken dazzled itself with its own graphics.

!rant but I am confused a bit..

A memorial for my favorite rant of all time "Why did the chicken cross the road?"

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Why did the chicken cross the road?

Assembler Chicken: First, it builds the road ......

C Chicken: It crosses the road without looking both ways.

C++ Chicken: The chicken wouldn't have to cross the road, you' d simply refer to him on the other side.

COBOL Chicken: 0001-CHICKEN-CROSSING.
IF NO-MORE-VEHICLES
THEN PERFORM 0010-CROSS-THE-ROAD
VARYING STEPS FROM 1 BY 1 UNTIL
ON-THE-OTHER-SIDE
ELSE
GO TO 0001-CHICKEN-CROSSING

Cray Chicken: Crosses faster than any other chicken, but if you don't dip it in liquid nitrogen first, it arrives on the other side frazzled.

Delphi Chicken: The chicken is dragged across the road and dropped on the other side.

Gopher Chicken: Tried to run but got beaten by the Web chicken.

Intel Pentium Chicken: The chicken crossed 4.9999978 times.

Iomega Chicken: The chicken should have ' backed up' before crossing.

Java Chicken: If your road needs to be crossed by a chicken, then the server will download one to the other side. (Of course, those are chicklets.) See also WMI Monitor.

Linux Chicken: Don't you *dare* try to cross the road the same way we do!

Mac Chicken: No reasonable chicken owner would want a chicken to cross the road, so there's no way to tell it how to cross the road.

Newton Chicken: Can't cluck, can't fly, and can't lay eggs, but you can carry it across the road in your pocket.

OOP Chicken: It doesn't need to cross the road, it just sends a message.

OS/2 Chicken: It crossed the road in style years ago, but it was so quiet that nobody noticed.

Microsoft's Chicken: It's already on both sides of the road. What's more its just bought the road.

Windows 95 Chicken: You see different coloured feathers while it crosses, but when you cook it still tastes like........ chicken.

Quantum Logic Chicken: The chicken is distributed probabilistically on all sides of the road until you observe it on the side of your choice.

VB Chicken: USHighways! <TheRoad.cross> (aChicken)

XP Chicken Jumps out onto the road, turns right, and just keeps on running.

The Longhorn Chicken had an identity crisis and is now calling itself Vista.

The Vista Chicken dazzled itself with its own graphics.

Found this while googling an error...

It identifies as an easter-egg therefor it is an easter-egg, so don't you dare egg shame me!

😁 It's not much but i'll take it 😂

I had a few girlfriends in the past and now am married for 4 years and can't remember any gfs before the married life. Ever had a pre-identity crisis?

My mind: "WHO THE F&*! WAS I? WHAT DID I DO? ITS LIKE TOTAL RECON AND AMNESIA ALTOGETHER!!"

Dude is having identity crisis

Scala is like the teenage child of Java and Python having an identity crisis.

I have a confession to make. I am indeed a team of entities. Yes! The only catch is all those entities live inside one brain.
My first and perhaps most important insight stemmed from not being able to overcome a persistent identity crisis. I spent seven years trying to figure out who I am and what my worldview is. I realized however that it was impossible. It makes no sense to be rational while your irrational part is hovering over, judging.

So, I split my “me” into two parts: rational and emotional. Usually, they coexist peacefully.

When presented with a complicated case, I let both speak. It doesn't matter if they contradict each other. The consensus is never reached, but at least both parts spoke their mind and are now calm.

There are two kikis. Rational kiki talks about life, insights, worldview, and occasionally tech. Emotional kiki sends leg pics and describes her wild dreams.

Also, it gets even more complex when derealization hits. Remember, autistic brains don't have garbage collectors, so as the day goes by, noise accumulates, influencing my entire being. In the morning, I'm cold and calculated, albeit a bit robotic. In the evening, I'm creative and talkative, albeit a bit unhinged.

You're welcome!

Anyone else ever been through an identity crisis? This shit is intense. For the first time in over a decade I'm questioning who I really am and how to be happy while interacting with the world around me.

I used to not give a fuck what people thought about me, my semi-haggard appearance was just part of my persona, but as time marched on and my hair got longer, I get nothing but shitty looks from people 40+. I feel like nobody takes me seriously anymore. I'm honestly debating just chopping off most of my hair and dressing nicer, essentially 'growing up'. Just kind of rolling over and blending in with everyone else. "The nail that sticks out gets hammered down." - I'm tired of getting hammered. I just want to retreat to my quiet little corner of newfound adulthood.

I don't like most of the people around me (programmers). I find most of them boring and with a really "flat" personality with no interests other than coding. I enjoy coding myself but sometimes I feel that I don't belong to this community. There is more in life than just your job.

If you don't have

1. Chronic depression.
2. Episodes of pure mania.
3. Low self esteem.
4. Superiority complex.
5. Drugs/Pills dependency.
6. Identity crisis.
7. Mind numbing migraines.
8. Carpal tunnel.

all of the above at the same time, can u even call yourself a software developer?

Developers more than other groups tend to hold their operating system or programming language of choice dearly, to the point where if someone thinks poorly of the OS or Language, they take it like a personal attack. Then there are those who think poorly of people who who's a certain OS or a specific language. Combine the two and you get hurt feelings and identity crisis.

Can we all just agree that we're all in different stages of learning and that we all generally end up going the same direction for the same types of problems?

Or just have it out and kill each other over it. Will give me great rant material.