If anyone here got WanaCry ransomware on his pc, here is a password "WNcry@2o17" to decrypt your files

Stolen from a telegram channel

Guess you aren't regretting the automatic Windows updates so much now

Changed my repo name to titanic.

Now it's syncing...
Syncing...
Syncing...
Syncing....

"Why is this taking so long?"

"Unforeseen complications"

"Why didn't you factor that in while estimating?"

"Because thats impossible, by definition."

Umm, Wut?

Frontend dev for 10+ years here.

"We can't afford to hire you as a senior, so your job title will be 'Frontend Developer' and your tasks will carry less responsibility than expected from a senior"

One year in, team of 2 handling 3 projects.

After merging with the parent company, we got business cards, mine describe me as a "Senior Frontend UI Engineer".
"Well, our customers only trust seniors, otherwise we can't send you to them".

Meanwhile a former colleague earns >1000€ more a month.

Yeah, fuck you too bosses!

Can't believe I spent the past 2+ hours looking for; and customizing a color theme for my code editor (... again) when I have a shitload of stuff to do :(

such table
very drop
much production
many customer
very pissed

A wise man once said:

Real programmers don't comment their code. If it was hard to write, it should be hard to understand.

😂😁

Chrome with 100+ tabs

The biggest coding distraction is sitting in front of a computer with internet access, let's be honest here.

I said I would do something in 2.5 hours, and I actually did it. This is really freaky.

Non-smoker coffee lover. Who's with me?

Windows obviously did a secret selective poll on what percentage of their users use dates and times.
:#

Fuck IE, Edge, everyone who worked on them and their ancestors.

Specially fuck their obtuse need to utterly ignore common standard expected fucking behaviour for CSS

Note to self:
Don't try to remove elements from a list using a for loop because the FUCKING LIST SIZE CHANGES!
Just copy required elements to another list and discard the previous.
Spent fucking 2 hours on this.
/Rant

If I got a dollar for every bug I fixed, I'd have NaN by now.

I once set a customers server on fire.
Litterally.
I put my laptop ontop of the server rack and the additional heat generated caused blue smoke to fill the room.
The whole building had to be evacuated.
Firetrucks came.
The customer eyeballed me quite a bit after he talked to the firemarshal regarding where the fire had originated.

During a software presentation for a group of clients i said:
"I reworked the interface for you. Now it's idiot-proof."

App has dark theme. Loading screen is bright white. RIP my eyes

The more I know the more I'm actually aware of how little I know.

Girls are like functions. Always up for an argument

I guess it's a bad rant…

Someone else: I hate notepad++, It's not even an IDE! I love Vim though
Me: And Vim is an IDE?

This is exactly what we asked for; but it is absolutely not what we wanted ...

That mind fuck movement....
When your IDE reports you error on line 235.

And you find out line 235 is actually a comment. FUCK!!!!

Girl: Can you make me an app?
Me: What kind of app do you have in mind?
Girl: I want it to be... like an app!
Me: Sounds a bit to difficult sorry.

What kind of ad is this supposed to be? 😂

I charmed the graphic designer and we "hung out" a lot at my place during lunch.

The graphic designer was the boss' daughter.