Wish you all a Happy New Year! Being a part of this community has made me feel a sense of belonging and that I'm a part of something bigger! Seeing all your fuck ups made me feel better that in not the only one, seeing all your accomplishments motivated me to achieve more in life! I would like to take this moment to thank you all and to make me feel proud of being a dev! I wish you all an amazing new year and may you all get whatever you wish this new year!

That time when I had absolutely no fucking work!

If you feel you're not confused enough in life, try writing JS for a Rhino engine interface implemented on a Java codebase.
I have to deal with stringified JSON, native JSON, java JSON objects (org.json.JSONObject) and all the different attributes and functions specific to each of these objects.
Even "Why are the Kardashians so famous?" doesn't confuse me as much as this shit does.

So I was watching porn today on my MacBook, and it just went blank midway.
It won't boot or respond to anything I do.

My porn awaits me.

Birthday gift is here! 😍

The facial hair devRant provides in it's profile builder are either well maintained thick growth of beard or a neatly trimmed uniform beard.
And here I am with my abomination of a beard that looks like a herd of cattle trampled over a sparse field of grass.

The struggle is real.

I have reached that point of my life where I feel a laptop with an internet connection is all I need to live the rest of my life.

Seeing how people dislike idea pitches like "It's like Uber but for ...".
I can't help but imagine how the idea of devRant might have been pitched -
"It's like Twitter but for frustrated developers" 😋

Management: List your most significant achievement during this cycle.

Me: Developed and implemented a full stack of database micro containers that allow scalability and reusability.

My brain.
Couldn't have been a dev without that.

Please, please for the sake of your born/unborn child, check whether the names of the entity attributes are not valid sql keywords.

Apple really is redefining the entire industry...
On terms of how expensive can a product be and how poor you are.

This is just a sweet little harmless block of code, why should I unit test it?

3 months later...
Bug in production : This is why.

This might be a highly specific mistake but, never ever uninstall the ms-office package installed on your work pc, linked to your corporate ms account. And then try to install another version from an installer you have lying around. Internal Support Team wasn't happy. 😅

Project deadline got preponed by 3 weeks. What a lovely day tis is!

Create AI that steals the jobs from the existing AI that stole the jobs.

1. I'm a programmer, that does not mean I know every possible programming language. Yes, I can build Android apps, standalone softwares, serverside frameworks. No, I do not know how to build frigging websites!

2. "You can build a website in 2 days, you're a programmer". Tell a single mechanic to build an entire car in 2 days or tell a civil engineer to build an entire building in 2 days and I'll build your website in 2 days.

AAAAAAARRRRRGGGGGHHHHH!
Why does your family think that being a programmer means being a magician who can just pull any kind of software, hardware, app, website out of their hat?

Fuck web development 😫

Recieved my stickers today. Found it aptly ironic to put one right next to one of the most "hated" languages on devRant 😗😋

Since the past 7 months I was working on a project coded in C++ and shell script.

Today I was shifted to a project where I'm required to code in JavaScript and SQL.

I can't differentiate between my head and a scrambled egg.

Sometimes pushing code into production without testing, if the changes are extremely small.

Does anyone else experience the excess knowledge crisis? Wherein you realise that there is so much knowledge out there that you don't know where to start, and the moment you start, you realise there is something new to learn and you instantly get distracted.

Fucking gdb with your stupid commands, showing me the memory allocation, shos me the data you stupid piece of shit, what is the value pointed by the pointer.

*Segmentation fault**core dumped*

Oh gdb! How much I missed you. Please don't ever leave me okay?

What do you do after a long tiring exhaustive day of coding?

When you're mentally debugging a module and you have an intuition about the point of failure.
So you start mentally tracking variables, going down functions calls, moving from one class to another until finally you reach that one line of code that you feel is getting the wrong parameters.
You substitute in the 10 different variables you have been mentally tracking and find out that...
THE LINE OF CODE IS GETTING THE CORRECT PARAMETERS, AND IS FUNCTIONING AS IT SHOULD.

fuck.

Debugging over developing?

In open source we believe

After 2 weeks of ranting I have honestly ran out of rants.
Either my life as a dev is too good or I'm clearly not coding enough.
The later seems more plausible.

Hey management,
Please assign me that Node.js project that I'll get to code from scratch and I'm stoked about.
Regards,
Frustrated developer.