My manager committed an empty Jenkinsfile on his project (he loves committing empty files or docs with words "TODO" in them). I decided to add the project to Jenkins so at least he sees a red X and failed build on ever branch .... green check? An empty Jenkinsfile is a valid Jenkinsfile?! Damn it Jenkins!

You know how a normal developer will start writing a program, and then take the big pieces and split/refactor it; move hard coded things into functions that take arguments, and cleaning up along the way?

Our manager makes a tons of empty files, and empty directories, with how he thinks he wants to build something, and checks them all in. Tons of .gitkeep files in empty directories, blank Jenkinsfile, Dockerfile that doesn't build.

When he makes wiki documentation, there are tons of subsections, all of which are links to pages with "TODO" in them.

Dear god stop it you asshat! Stop making tons of empty files and pages. Write the thing in one chunk and then split it as needed like someone who actually knows how to engineer software!

Look how happy we are

My manager asks, in Slack, if we can change the auto-tagger to update the patch instead of the minor version. I respond by saying, "Yes, it's in the Jenkisfile. Really we should switch to just <major.minor> and drop patch."

My manager asks why and I go on to say the last number is useless (unless you ship software externally and need to hotfix or security patch a minor release; internally they serve little purpose).

At my last job we dropped three numbers for two, and most other teams here only use two numbers.

He sends a link to the semantic versioning website.

The next day one of the other developers sends it to me in a private chat as a joke. 😂😅 I'm glad I'm not the only one who thinks our manager shouldn't be a manager.

Finally closed an Epic that was started on April of 2019 to migrated everyone off the old Jenkins server. Finally completed, nearly a year later and under a different project manager and director.

Looking through old photos, I found some eBay shots of the first two cellphones I have ever owned. I decided to turn those photos into a blog post, listing every single phone I've owned throughout my adult life. Enjoy:

https://battlepenguin.com/tech/...

Is scrolling broken on devRant on Firefox for anyone else? When I click on a rant and try to scroll, some wonky piece of Javascript keeps bumping me back up as I try to scroll down, with both the scroll wheel and the scroll bar. God damn it, stop hijacking scrolling! There is no reason for you to!

A good friend of mine turned 38 yesterday. It will be his last birthday. Last month was his last Christmas and New Years. He entered hospice care this month. His doctors have said he's only got a few weeks left, so he's come off the treatment for his brain tumour. His kids are old enough to understand he won't be here much longer. A bunch of us, friends from high school, flew up to see him in the fall. It's hard to believe someone our age won't be with us to see another year. It puts things in perspective.

Our company just turned most of the team leads into managers to unflatten the organization. Most of the team leads really shouldn't be managers, nor do many of them have any desire to.

Normally a company that wants to do this will create a few manager positions, and let everyone in the company apply for them first, before opening it up externally.

The way they've rolled this out seems like it can only be disastrous.

Just a regular software engineer...

The new CTO promised us better coffee in his introduction meeting. Honestly felt pretty trivial and part of his used car salesman pitch to us.

A month goes buy and he replaces our shitty drip Starbucks breakfast blend coffee with ... Starbucks coffee machines. I shit you not these things have touch screens on them. So I tried two cups of each bean type and ... this stuff is really really bad. It's literally worse than the drip brew. It's so fucking terrible I have trouble finishing a cup.

God damn it!

"I really like how corporate America ruins you as a person within two years. If you had any aspirations to do anything useful for humanity, they gone."

-Text from my best friend from graduate school

We had a company feedback meeting the other week; an airing of grievances so to speak. One of the complaints was about how when someone calls 911, no one knows exactly where it goes.

The way he phrased it, we all though it was a metaphor. But as they talked about it, someone said, "Wait, are you .. you're taking about real 911 calls? Like this isn't a metaphor?"

All VoIP gets routed via the central office; so when someone from the California office dials 911 on a phone, they get a 911 dispatch in Illinois. 😶

Java and his brother..

Do you program in Java?

During the past week, I've lost so much focus. It's difficult to keep pushing myself to care about stuff at work. I try to get some minimal tickets done and a wiki page out, but it's wearing on me.

The girl in the row across from me has this in front of her nameplate

"There's a branch on terraform-our-project called instance-rols"

"Can you send me a link?"

OMG are you really so fucking lazy you can't go to the fucking git web interface, look up the damn project and click on the fucking branch?

Writing in Electron...

On category theory...

It does run...

Everyone greeted me this morning when I came in .... something must be broken.

Those massive privacy leaks we call error reports...

One of my coworkers made an R2D2 for his friend's wedding (it was the ring bearer). It took five 3D printers working around the clock for three solid months.

Chief Innovation Officer? Is that a literal bullshit position?

We found a binary string on our Loggly server. It's a PDF file .. the entire PDF file, being sent, to our logging service.

This is the first company I've been at without annual performance reviews. Employees are supposed to go to their manager when they feel they deserve a pay increase and start and undocumented process of writing up their contributions for the year. No standard cost of living increases.

There's a guy who uses a small electric scooter to speed across the office. It's less than 30 meters to the other side of the office.

Guy is going to hurt someone at some point. I don't even know the guy but I can already tell he's a dick.

I'm almost through this sugar free Monster and I'm still falling asleep and it's only 10am. I'm going to get some coffee, but it may be too late. No amount of caffeine may be able to keep me awake today.

I started working at a new company a couple of weeks ago as a Dev/Ops engineer, my first real ops position after years of being mostly a dev with two sys-admin positions sprinkled in.

I should have seen the red warning signs when, during the interview, a developer told me the old devops team was so bad they fired all of them last year. After I started, I learned that all four people on our team were totally new. Three were hired after the last guy from the old team left (without any notice) and one person use to be a developer who was transferred over to this new team (but not to lead it).