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1: Get a dog
2: Name dog Sudo
3: Teach Sudo to fetch my mail
4: Invite Linux-friend over
5: Yell "sudo fetchmail"
6: ?
7: Profit20 -
Introducing avatar pets & a new way to unlock avatar items! Pets include cats, dogs, birds and tigers. We know getting all those ++'s can take some time, so while all avatar items are just as reachable for free by earning ++'s from rants and comments, we now allow items to be purchased in-app based on the difference in ++'s you have to the ++ unlock value of the item. (To purchase, you'll need the latest app version)
Paying for avatar items helps us keep the devRant servers up and running and also is extra motivation to add more fun avatar items. If you have any questions or find a bug, please let me or @dfox know. Happy ranting!
38 -
Replace the teachers with no real world experience with part-time workers that are still active in IT.
I had this last year in my final year of vocational education and it was amazing, I had two teachers running their business two days a week and teaching us everything on the three remaining days.
I learnt about oop without dogs and cats, I learnt to extract information from invoices to be able to create an invoicing system without being misled by customers, and much more.
Second thing would also be something we did in my previous education. It was called "learning productively".
Basically, companies would give a project to the school and students could pick one to do for a few months. You had to have meetings with the customer, you had to give presentations and it wasn't another fucking calculator.
I've had the pleasure of working with a big corporation like this and learnt a ton in my first year.
These were extremely valuable, I think I'd still be a piece of shit developer without any knowledge on how to actually develop a full system and how to manage a project as a dev.
Peace6 -
If you disrupt my working flow and you're not
1) On fire.
2) About to explode.
3) You're dog is dead(dogs are the shit)
4) Snoop dog is in the building
Then you're a cunt.19 -
I hope everyone at Microsoft working on Windows 10 dies a horrible death and gets eaten by dogs. FUCK YOU windows!
I have a dual boot machine, logged into windows after a while(months) . Fucker 5 hours to update. Now that it's updated, I did the task I had to do and shifted back to Linux. Now all my other drives, which I didn't so much as touch with windows are fucking read only for some reason!
2 fucking hours spent on trying to find the problem, now I realize thag that after the fuckmaster's update, They reset all my settings and the dicklickin Fast Startup was on again!
FUCK YOU AND YOUR SHITTY WINDOWS TEAM MICROSOFT! CAN'T EVEN PERSIST USER SETTINGS DURING AN UPDATE THEN HAVE THE BALLS TO TELL ME "ALL YOUR FILES ARE EXACTLY WHERE YOU LEFT THEM".
Dear head engineer at windows team, or product manager, or whoever the fuck is in charge of this shit, JUMP UP YOUR OWN ASS AND DIE WITH A DILDO IN YOUR MOUTH YOU DIPSHIT!19 -
New rant = Rant.type(['non-dev', 'public transportation']).init()
So i am taking the bus now to see a friend, and this fucking whale woman comes on board with a baby caddy, except, it wasn't for a baby, but for a fucking dog the size of a brick. That already in itself makes me grumble because dogs have fucking legs and there is no fucking real need to carry them around like newborns.... Anyways this woman sits and takes up a lot of space for the 'handicapped' persons for her fucking baby dog... So far no real issue there since people with disabilities hardly get on this bus line. A fzw bus stops later an equally whale black woman gets on the bus, obviously struggling with her size and her caddy filled with groceries...
There is enough room to accomodate the baby caddy and her groceries.
That fucking white whale says to her 'there is no room there, move someplace else'... The black woman stands there in disbelief, and this is the first time i look up, giving the 'the fuck you just say bitch' look to the white whale. I mention there is enough room and the black whale sits carefully next to the dog caddy.
Now the bus takes a sharp turn, the dog caddy tips over due to the g-forces it causes...and inmediately this white whale shouts to the black whale 'fucking retard, don't tip my dog over!' this while the black woman apologises for the fall of the caddy not even being her fault...
This angered me so puch that i rantzd to this woman: 'madam, thzre is such a thing called physics, the bus made a sharp turn and your stupud useless space-wasting dog caddy tipped over bzcause of that. Don't just go accusing people for your own degenerate racist lifestyle. I suggest you hold on to it and apologise to the lady'
She then murmles incomprehensibly and gives a butthurt look, rhe black woman thanks me and tries to remain very quiet on her seat, eventually she gets off
This fucking thing makes me angry to a level i wanna toeturz that whale by peeling off her skin with garden fence metal wiri g, suck the fat out of her body and brain with an industrial vacuum cleaner and put her in the fucking oven baking in her own fat, of course without any anesthetics...
Damnit all to hell!
Also, why on earth do dogs need caddy's? They got perfectly fine legs!
I know, sadist inside11 -
So... some guy at the company I work for complains to software dept that we've broken his app.
He's saying we've removed the drop down list from this field he uses....
We're all like... there's never been a drop down list there?!
it escalates and some big-dogs get involved. One of us has to go out and see him. Turns out the "drop down list" was his browsers saved autocomplete history, and he had changed browsers.
Asshole.2 -
That moment when my boss and I were having a conversation (2 weeks into my new job) and she tells me her daughters name is "Amber" and I jump up with, "oh snap!! That's my dogs name too!!" 😑4
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Window...update available... Later
And now ?
Later
And now?
Later
And now?
Later
And now?
Later
And now?
Finish my day, do it fucker but tomorrow you need to work
Today ... Bootloop
Mother fucking ☮️ of shit5 -
Somehow, the company I work for has decided it is ok for people to have their dogs in the office.
One of the dogs is such a sissy, cries and make stupid noises - I has been so for many many month.
Yesterday, when we had our asses full of stuff to do. The dog decided that it really have to take a dump inside the office and start barking (more like "veff").
So I turned around, to my other collegue and asked him really loud:
"Should groceries really do that?"
He is asian, he liked the joke. But the owner did not.4 -
Me: I'm gonna be productive today. Will complete this task in one hour!
*starts coding enthusiastically*
After two minutes...
*facebook*
*cat video*
Awwwww
*dog video*
Lol heheh!
*cute kittens n puppies*
Heh, silly cat
*more cats, dogs*
*accidentally notices the time*
Crap! 1.5 hours gone waste....7 -
I had the dream of working as web designer in Berlin.
You know: techno partys, hedonistic lifestyle and cheap living.
I applied and flew over and got some Interviews.
Arrived at the agency situated in a beautiful broad avenue in a villa at the Olympia Stadion. I was greeted by 2 loud small dogs and nobody else was there. So i waited an half an hour.. and another one...
I notice their company code of conduct nicely framed on the wall. You know what is written on the first place?
"We value peoples time therefore we're punctual."
"We are cosequent"
So after two hours waiting they came. They were pretty stressed out and neded another 45 minutes to get ready to interview me. So they sat at the table telling me excuses. And i pointed at the frame and they suddenly got very bleak in their faces. I stood up and left after 3 hours of waiting. 😆
Sadly no Berlin for me.
13 -
I played a lot of Command & Conquer when I was younger, and I remember going through the files for C&C: Red Alert. I found one that had all the units names and properties, and wondered what happened if I changed a value. So I changed grenadiers attack speed to something ridiculously fast, and found that it actually changed it in the game!
The light bulb went off in my head, and I then created new units:
- Albert Einstein that shot electricity
- Attack dogs that launched missiles
Granted the animations didn't exist for these so it defaulted to playing their death animations when attacking, which was amusing.
That was the ah-ha moment for me that lead me to pursue programming. It was just so much fun!4 -
These anti AI type news articles are ridiculous. We are decades away from anything like skynet. People have seen too much fiction. Everyone used to dream of flying cars, did that happen? No. Do not be fooled, machines can do clever things but they are no where near becoming sentient beings. You try and build something that has the same IQ of a dog and it will still require a shit ton of power and hardware. Plus as far as I'm aware dogs haven't taken over the planet with their level of intelligence.
At the end of the day machines need power to run and we control the source. If anything futuramas more realistic in how AI/robots will integrate with society than these shit piece newspapers.33 -
This startup I started working for with their shitty code base written by interns, restrictive sys admin who had no actual use in the company since I was the one setting up their servers, know-it-all CEO, stupid HR representative who used to grill employees for being 10 minutes late in the morning, very small apartment "HQ", using fingerprints to signal our entry and our leave to and from the office, no formal process, and, to top it all, monitoring our own laptops which we use for work with a software that takes screenshots every few minutes. In short, it had the worst in corporates with the worst of startups combined in one company.
If, hypothetically, we could overlook all this, I couldn't overlook the horrible smell this place had. The apartment was overlooking a small garden which was a home for many stray cats and dogs. You can imagine how horrible this smell was. The weird thing was that no one there seemed to really care about the smell!!
I lasted there for only one week before I gave my resignation and I believe I had every right to do so.3 -
I worked on an amazing web app that tracked satellites and their failure rates. it was beautiful and worked fantastically. Me team worked like dogs to get it done three months. Our manager insisted it has to work perfectly for the demo and we delivered... We all got raises and everyone was happy, right? WRONG!
Demo day comes and management decides that they don't want to build the app because the customer pulled out. Sooo my manager then asked me why I wasted so much time building it when static images would have been fine. I lost my cool and yelled at my manager "YOU'RE THE ONE THAT TOLD ME TO GET A FULLY FUNCTIONAL SYSTEM WORKING!" Then I stormed out of the meeting.
It is still the coolest thing I ever built. Too bad it will never see the light of day.3 -
That feeling when you are in a hospital away from your family and you get a call that your neighbour's huge dog tore apart your lil doggy right in front of your wife and 2yo kiddo....
WHAT THE FUCK PEOPLE!
If you have dangerous dogs -- USE FUCKING MUZZLES!!! FFS!!!
Thanks God that monster was satisfied by just killing a doggy and didn't touch my fam29 -
Best : I moved on from Dev to SecOps and got a well paid job in a small company closer to my home. With three office dogs.
Really, the dogs are the main thing there. The money is just an additional benefit.
Worst : my Dev life keeps getting less and less relevant for me. In the last two years, I started volunteering a lot (local volunteer fire department and then some), investing into several side businesses that start paying off now, generally doing as much non-dev stuff as possible.
I wanted to do this since I was a kid, I'm good at it, but I keep finding other things to do, because they're more interesting and more of a challenge.
Honestly, the one thing that keeps me in IT is sunk cost fallacy.
Hell, I'm thinking about becoming a paramedic or something, at least I'll be helping people instead of entertaining managers.4 -
Yes yes yes
Let's spend countless hours writing painful spaghetti that generates a financial report, extend that spaghetti for specs, then not bother to check the amounts or status. or where it says the money went. Nope, checking non-unique names is totally good enough. We're so good at this. Ten points to the legendaries.
Let's also make the object factories not create the objects correctly, and make sure that report includes entries for orders that don't include any actual payments. Oh, their status? "Ready to send" of course! Let's send that totally valid $0.00 to nobody!
Oh, but Root. Root, root, root. You can't ADD payments to this. no no no. if you do, it'll break specs everywhere else that uses that factory! Shame on you for suggesting it.
Pssh, now you want to make a payment just for this report? Why would you do that? Our best devs have been working on this for years! What could you possibly know that they don't? No, they're perfect. Don't touch them. Just make them better, okay? No take, only throw!5 -
Haha this happened to me once! But it took me a week to figure it out and after re-writing the code and hours upon hours of googling
2 -
My JetBrain studient licence is over ... :'( RIP i dont have budget to buy good IDE.
welcome back VScode16 -
Tooday
Movie sucks
Games sucks
Most programmers sucks
Buying a house sucks
Try to get a grocery under 200$ for nothing sucks
Have child with no future other then capitalisme sucks
Friends that don't take any news in 8 years sucks
Have a girlfriend that don't sucks sucks
Buying pricey shit and thinking i will survive at least 10 years and broke after 3 years with warranty sucks
All social platforms sucks ( other then devrant)
Working for a shit salairy and doing everyone jobs sucks
Lossing mind about idiots in our world sucks
My english sucks
You sucks
My water heater sucks
My landlord sucks
My budget sucks
My old 16 years old bike i use to go work sucks
Government sucks
House builder sucks at 80%
Bank fuck you everytime sucks
Taxes for any service sucks
Medical system in canada sucks
Educational system in canada sucks
Goes on each day i realize something sucks...12 -
My girlfriend's dog died, so I tried to cheer her up by getting her an identical one. It just made her more upset. She screamed at me, "What am I supposed to do with two dead dogs?"1
-
I moved from a no-dogs-allowed company to an office with three dogs in.
Forget the better salary, the more freedoms, the nicer boss I have now.
The main benefit is that I get to pet dogs every day now!7 -
Friend: "I'm so tired of coding. I've been pressured to do it since I was 9. My dad worked for Sun and he was so obsessed with coding that he even named our dogs Java and Scratch" 😂7
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I believe @Jase/@jAsE/@theRealJase/@myAss is an outsourced devRant account managed by poor chinese dogs paid by a rotten ratmeat.
Edit: And I am his ++ bot.1 -
If you don't feel good enough with your programming skills, keep practicing but don't be sad, there are dogs all around the world that love you
3 -
I dont have a rubber duckie, nor a stress ball... but these two terriers are always by my side when coding ❤
3 -
Tooday ... Shit day
Anonce buisness shutdown and everybody losses is job including me 😥 happy holidays everybody ... Fuck this commercial badluck fucking snowy shit seasons !11 -
*About to start an important call with the client*
Neighborhood dogs: "Now is a good time for us to start barking for no reason"3 -
I've just noticed there are dogs available as pet too now.
No wolves available though unlike big cat.8 -
*wild LinkedIn notification appears*
>Opens LinkedIn
>Sees a video of dogs being dogs
>Reads caption something along the lines of "team work and dedication helps the universe to fight global warming and terrorism "
>*Eye rolls* -
Hooo boy the difference between working in fastfood and working in webdev. 2 week salary is not the same ! 💵💵💵3
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Dog barks. Then the other dog barks. Then the lady who owns the dog starts yelling at the dogs. She's yelling and they are barking - and they get louder and louder. What was the goal again? Oh yeah... this is just how agencies work. Go with it. The goals don't matter.2
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HR: "People you got to keep believing in the software so we can succeed. You look like a pack of beaten dogs who have given up the fight".
I can choose to believe in God and that he will bless us with a miracle but that's not going to make it any more real than believing in the software is going to fix all the work still left. 😑2 -
It's cute how most companies think that someone will take the time to personally hack them. Like nah mate there's countless bots running around the internet like a rabid pack of dogs sniffing ip addresses and running exploit, one of the stragglers will pick you off...
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You want oracle database ? Load OCI.dll
You want microsoft SQl ? Load sqlsrv.dll et dotnet.dll
You want mysql ? Its already install
xD why the project have 3 different database :O with less then 2 table each !!! Ffuuuuukkkkkk7 -
For the holyday i teach my girlfriends how to code a cards game in python 😁 ... She stuck on the self everyfucking where XD4
-
Shiieet ... I lost my appetite to learn new things and technology 😐😔 this pendemic need to stop asap.5
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Modify the front-end code and noting change.
Empty the cache... ✔️ not work
Check xampp open... ✔️ not work
Check my sass compile... ✔️ not work
Compile vuejs webpack... ✔️ not work
Check my laravel route... ✔️ not work
Check with Xdebug... ✔️ not work
Go get coffee... ✔️Not work
See the url on stagging.<website>.ca in my browser ❌
😲🙄😅 Holy fucking retard i am...4 -
Invent a startup:
"It's like <existing company> but for <target audience>"
ex: It's like Uber but for dogs.5 -
So.. pets for your avatars.. but I don't see the alternative of having a baby crawling around your feet available for choosing instead of dogs and cats.. crawling around, biting cables, smashing my keyboard steeling, buying adorable and distracting her dad from working. because that's what my home environment looks like.. maybe I don't have enough ++'s
;-)6 -
Not particularly dev related but I do need to rant.
Parents are here to visit, it's lovely to see them. Unfortunately I have a small ass 1 bed flat because rent and house prices are stupid high where I work. I'm sleeping in the living room on an air bed, the fridge/freezer is noisy and about 3 foot from my head so I've been turning it off over night. It didn't get plugged in this morning so shit's getting thrown out. I sleep maybe 5 hours, wake up at 1 too hot, 4 too cold then mother comes in at 6 with the dogs. 3rd night of this. I've taken holiday even though I don't have much to spare because there's no way in fuck I can work feeling like this, I'm a dev and need to be able to think and do intelligent things ffs.
It's nice to see family but it's nice to have my own space too. -
I have a 4S I leave lying around and most apps are dogs on it or crash.
Not DevRant app, though. Pretty solid. Impressive job.9 -
Me: If humans lose the ability to hear high frequency volumes as they get older, can my 4 week old son hear a dog whistle?
Doctor: No, humans can never hear that high of a frequency no matter what age they are.
Me: Trick question... dogs can't whistle.3 -
Random poll:
If you have pets, do you own a cat or a dog?
A colleague has a personal statistic that says most developers have cats rather than dogs.
Just checking her data!52 -
Soon every hacker can move to Toronto and play real-life Watch Dogs.
https://amp.theguardian.com/comment... -
I'd like to share with you guys the fact that I had one of the greatest Christmases ever!
This includes having randomly received this debugging duck from someone that had no idea what it would mean to me, but also meeting people who brought 4 dogs to the family reunion (I am absolutely in love with dogs)
1 -
Firts social hacking ever 😁😁😁
In the bus at the end of the day
Me:(fake phonecall to Bell)ho you offert me a 10go of data per months for 30$ ! Wow
Guy in bus: he call is phone company and give all is Private information in the bus to have a better deal.
Me: poke him and say "you know now i can create accounts on your billing address for free"
Guy: Holy shit man you are right i need to take care.
Me: now change all you password contains what you publicly said.
Me: have a good day 😋3 -
New Promise(resolve,reject).then.then.catchmthen.catch.then.then.then.promise.then.catch.then.then
This is my week2 -
My 15 year old son witnessed our two male dogs licking each other's privates. My son, in some sort of shock, starts walking around the house saying "My dog is a homo sex you awl!" repeatedly (emphasis on how the syllables sounded).
I stopped him and said, "We need to talk about the birds and the birds."4 -
What's wrong with the idea of having a huge computational network like in Watch Dogs to bruteforce encryption ?
I mean suppose having 500 or more million cores , how long does it actually take to bruteforce a 256 bit key ?11 -
Before 7am this morning I'd managed to sit on my laptop that had fallen underneath a cushion and drop my phone in the kitchen, bouncing along the tile floor and into a puddle of my dogs drool.
My body is clearly anti-technology today.4 -
Client : i need to filter login by ip adresse
Me: ok its done put ip in CIDR block in admin panel and voila
Client: URGENT URGENT email ... Noting work on your shit ..=_=
Me (head) : what a fucking jerk i dont know how work CIDR IP block ...ans i demands it ...2 -
Client had this great idea for a business where he would kennel dogs at his house and have a premium upgrade to the service where he would sell dog treats and other items as well as have a private members only area where they could view their dog.
My first question was "Is there any demand from your customers for such things and what type of budget do you have?"
His response was "I don't have much of a budget but I can give you some hockey tickets and give you a stake in the profit."
I politely declined. He didn't even have any cameras in his house to pull off such a thing, either let alone he didn't have a boarding license. Oh clients.3 -
TeamWork 1 week before release de projet
Guys i dont know why but all the projet is fuckup in Git ...
Me: where is your firts commit of all these shit ?
He: just there
Me : git reset eb23ae --hard && git push origin HEAD --force
Me: now you sit there and you play with your pencil ! 😡😠
Thx2 -
It's pouring cats and dogs in Mumbai since a week. For the uninitiated, these are regular monsoon rains for the costal city.
And some motherfucker stole my umbrella from the office.
Thankfully when I left, rains had halted and I was able to commute home without getting wet.
Tomorrow when the fucker gets it back, I am gonna make them stand in rain for an hour.7 -
You think one day your dog could be a wireless adapter. Nowadays dog are getting microchips, as sick as it sounds I wonder if you can ad a wireless chip card on a dogs microchip.5
-
People who don't know anything about programming after playing watch dogs 2: "I AM A HACKING GOOOOOOOOD!"2
-
Back in NAM those who left the pointers without cleaning them we called them DESERTERS and made them sleep with the dogs.
-
When to log into an encrypted vm that I set up for finances, and realized I had forgotten my password, to decrypt it. Well after a few min I gave up and wrote a short program with all my sees, and rules for altering the seeds and combinations there of.
Got back a few thousand and plugged it into a macro script and went to do chores for my wife. Came back and was in.
To be honest I check on it somewhere in the middle and thought oh crap did I use my dogs name? I didn't but now I am switching to a password manager.2 -
#cursee&productivity
Working from home again 🕺
By no means slacking. I'm legit working. With the exception of petting my dogs every now and then.4 -
!rant
Today I finally found a randomly appearing bug that prevented our nightly backup on our production servers! Finally!
Now I can go to sleep in peace. -
Why printer services is stuck in time?
The windows printer spooler is old like my grandma. He fuck all the time but nobody wants to recode it ? I need to search for old driver a day long to make it fucking work at 10%
On linux generic printer driver do the job but cannot do all the things you want
Why is so fucking complicated all the time ? ( Don't think that scanner work you don't have de correct driver )
Solutions printer share the code for how de fuck i work ?2 -
I hate UpWork and Freelancer.com fees and policies about the privacy (or lack) for your projects. But I grudgingly admit they offer protections against fraud. If you're a freelancer, or if you employ freelancers, and do so without the fraud protections of these types of services, how do you guard against being taken advantage of by clients or freelancers? I mean, anyone can write and sign contracts but in the end they're just paper promises not worth anything if the people you're working with or for are "dogs on the Internet" who can simply disappear.2
-
Today ... Like other day i wake up. And go satisfy all the need of my client in the chat .. and remove what i made and unmade and made and unmade and made and change color and more at left and more at top add padding bottom and unmade and made and save and clear cache and unmade and clear cache and made and change color.
You see the shiti pattern now
😒😒😒😒😔😔😔😔😑2 -
If you discovered a vulnerability affecting multiple of the big dogs, would file a cve and report it immediately or have some *fun* first?
-
At job
Im ready to work on a new web site.
Wait for content... Wait for content... Wait for content... Wait for content... Wait for content
You have 3 week to do it completely
🤔🤪2 -
Can you make me this page please.
Me: its done its 100% like the psd you send me
She: yes but this component is bigger then this one
Me: its the same here the css proof
She: can you change it ?
Me: ( this will change the hole component and douin the same shit ) yes i will do it for you.
She: again this is not the same size
Me: ( what the fuck i said to shut is mouths ) ............. Fml -
My own little version of moore's law:
In 1986 the connectome (the brain) of c. elegans, a small worm, was mapped. It would take decades before the research caught up to the point where we had the hardware to simulate it.
In 2024, we have successfully mapped, and fully simulated (to matching observed behavioral data) the brain of a fruit fly, a total of 139,255 neurons and corresponding connections.
Thats a 38 year period.
If the period is roughly 40 years, and the leap in successful neurons mapped *and simulated* is by an average of 461 times the prior number of neurons, then by 2062-2064 we will be simulating box jellyfish, fruit flys, zebrafish, bees, ants, honey bees, cockroachs, coconut crabs, geckos, guppys, sand lizards, snakes, skinks, toirtoises, frogs, iguanas, shrews, bats, and even moles.
By the dozens or hundreds in any given simulation.
By the year 2100-2104 we'll be fully simulating the brains of mice, quill, crocodiles, birds such as doves, rats, zebra finchs,
guinea pigs, lemurs, ducks, ferrets, cockatiels, squirrels, mongoose, prairie dogs, rabbits, octopi, house cats, buzzards, parakeets, grey parrots, snowy owls, racoons, and even domestic pigs.
And in the years between 2100 to 2140, starting immediately with domestic dogs, we will ramp up and end with the capacity to simulate human brains in full, probably by the dozens or hundreds.
This assumes we can break the quantum barrier of course.20 -
I love cats more than dogs.
Despite being domesticated, cats remain true predators with true predator skills and the pedigree that comes with them. The evidence is your local government mandating house cats should wear bell collars to warn birds, as they threaten their extinction otherwise.
Modern dogs are mere scavengers that live off people and eat trash. They evolved to be cute by tilting their heads. Dogs aren't useless, mind you, I just like cats more.
But both dogs and cats are dwarfed by YE MIGHTY FROGGE. Frogs are the most fascinating and magnificent creatures to ever roam this troubled planet, maybe rivaled only by orcas. Frogs are the best. They're also the cutest, especially when touching a small yellow one can kill an elephant.11 -
I'd like to make an open source data registry, with an easy to access API. For example, perhaps I'd like to list all cities and postal codes in France, or perhaps get the number of dogs in Canada. Any ideas how to structure the open source part? How can people contribute? Should it use external APs?2
-
!rant
Today I found a huge performance bug of a coworker which brought our production servers to the limit.
Some heavy calculations were made 3 times when visiting some special pages... Instead of eg. 5 seconds the load needed 15 seconds.😮
So happy that the servers will run smooth again!1 -
We are currently refactoring our application in order to use multiple languages. The application startet 1997 and later it supported 2 fix languages. So it's one defined language or the other, this was used in uncountable places. Now a team of 6 developers has to refactor all the code of the last 20 years, where labels are used and an old translator was magically used out of nowhere..
Turns out it's a ton of work to get the software ready for really multiple language support. -
Thanks thanks thanks devrant to not add theses useless story bubble shit in your apps like every other one7
-
Just in case anyone here knows someone stupid enough to believe that all the major companies aren't listening to you ALL THE TIME.
https://youtube.com/watch/...
TLDW: Dude doesn't own a dog, sees no dog ads on Google. Closes the browser and talks about dogs for a minute. Then multiple pages advertise dog toys to him.3 -
Hi people first as you know my English is not very poor im sorry for that.
I try to make an automat a sprinkle water and a auto light on a interior garden in aquarium.
For that in python i use main thread, a class Water.py extends Threading and Light.py extends Threading
In the __init__.py file i put my main function that get argv for execution. One of my arguments is -v (--verbose)
I want to pass that args to my class instances.
-I don't want to make one parameter in my constructors because I think we don't passe verbose mode in parameter of constructor.
-I use global not working through de import.
Do you have some magic for me :/ ?6 -
New update available on your phone...
Wait people to teste it before installing. It look stable, ok i will install it
After the update
Fucking shit the clock is on the left side 🤮 what the fuck is this shit android... The settings menu is now a ducking mess. The finger print scan is so slow i can cooke an egg before he unlock the phone. The multi tasking screen is like iphone and look like a garbedge. Some applications rushing running.3 -
Boss : make me a project with serverless and vue js
Me: you renounce to the SEO
Boss: no i need full visibility on search engines
Me: i will prerender it :'(
Rant :what i can do to save de seo of an vuejs application ? ... My html file have div id app ... End XD3 -
So the contract for this big project with a client has some interesting content in it. I'm not sure if I can sign this in good faith.
Because I seem to be lacking guard dogs and a receptionist at my home office. Maybe I could build a force field for them.
And I'm not really looking forward towards having all my friends sign a document every time they visist.
5 PHYSICAL SECURITY
5.1 Adequate physical security perimeters (e.g. fences, walls, barriers, guards, gates, electronic surveillance, physical authentication mechanisms, reception desks and security patrols) shall be implemented to safeguard Information and information systems.
5.2 Supplier shall have a documented visitor policy and all visitors must be identified, registered, logged, and accompanied by an employee from Supplier.2 -
My boss don't give me any information about the project in 2 months ... Then the application need to run in 1 week ... Im the only developers in this faculty .. suprise ! I said to him the project cannot be delivered in such small time ...
Boss : but you having so mutch time to do it !
me: but you tell me to fix some PC screen and printer and is not my job to do that im a programmer.
Boss: but you have certification in programmation and tech support
Me: yes but you hire me to code your project not to fix your forest !
Boss: if you don't want to work just say it
Me: never mind ...
Results: i change faculty in the university -
Develop all my lambda function, create endpoint for what i need, set up CORS to * time of development... And chrome fuck me with CORS preflight ERROR. What the actual fuck with this shit security easily bypassable...
Me: its enough for today. Change project folder 😐 -
Is there any other programmer that started as an architect (building architect, not IT)?
I'm divided between two different careers and working around 15hours a day because I can't focus on one. Is this a normal thing?
I work as an architect for the past 6 years and were always interested in the technology part of it.
Soon I got to be a BIM coordinator and started using Dynamo for Revit.
After that, I got involved in learning Python and now start studying web dev (front-end)
Programming is very addictive! I get it now why IT people stay in their dorm like it's a cave
In architecture there's always a client you need to make happy, while in programming I create things the away I want them to be, without all the boring formalities that I am used to.
I can learn it for free and there's a huge community to help on it. All careers should be like this.
I'm happy, but really tired 😪 my social life is resumed to hanging out with my dogs5 -
Well, I've started work a few days ago, and I've got a rant for you as well.
Anyone here ever hear of laughter therapy?
Well my day was normal enough, rattling through the training material, and work was holding an appreciation day with some dogs, cakes, and a crazy laughing woman. She was the instructor for the laughter therapy.
So thanks to my newly found "try everything" mentality, and a senior dev dragging me along to fill seats, I was stuck in a room filled with other devs, being told to smile and laugh even if I was forcing myself to do it. So I did, we went through increasingly embarrasing and insane-looking exercises (e.g. Mime pouring and drinking a milkshake while laughing), until we were told to lie on the floor and belly laugh for 5 minutes.
Anyone here play/see "We Happy Few"? I was stuck standing next to the crazy sow, who looked one bad day away from beating everone in the room to death with a cricket bat!
As is customary for me, have a cute snek.
2 -
So last year in school, we did a project where we had to program a movie collection. So obviously we wrote "cat" a lot, for category.
So late one day, we just named a few variables "dogs" for the hell, then we'd change it back later... We forgot.
Realized it later when we had handed it in, and were defending it at the verbal exam 😂 -
I just think about it ...
Running docker on windows is shit
Running nginix on windows is boofff
Running apache on windows is boofff
Running WWS on windows is hugly
Install linux
All server software run like king
Don't have access to any adobe product for design and micro$hit office for client sanity because ODF is to special, i want my docx i said ... Like what do you want from me ... Shit the dev setup is a fucking mess because some enterprises don't want to wet itself in the futur...
Microsoft love linux BULLSHIT6 -
Talking about UX design.
Im on facebook scrolling down all this shit news and then i see one of my friend commenting on one post.
I tap on it and .... The commenting list appear but it not scroll to my friend comment... Close this shit get mad close facebook 😂
Long story short facebook sucks cocks1 -
All facebook group about web development is
- can you help me with my wordpress site
- how i can change my domaine name
- need help with e-commerce on wordpress
And other
Im there to follow new web technologies not to be a support guy jessus .
Quit the group2 -
That feeling when you fixing bugs in production and add another one that's even worse, so now your getting about 300 error mails for a bug which was 10 seconds online...1
-
At the office
5 website is down !
Searching for answer ... Noting. Nginx is calm, php is calm, DB to many connections :O but the DB is interne acces only !!!
Internal ddos WTF
Drupal 8 website -> sorry guy i just fucked up and write 8Go of useless log in watchdog table because something went wrong
Actual log : %errormessage %errortime %vardump
Me : damm he fucked up and cannot write some complet log 🤣
Do you know some module to limit this table size and write acces ?2 -
Windows : fuck you i delete your KMS file
Windose : your licence is expiring in 30 days
Me: re apply KMS and disable that fucking useless anti virus
Window just self permit to delete my file with no fucking reason and not notify me in is shiti settings panel1 -
!rant
I finally published my first open source project. A package for calculation a geohash of a geolocation for pharo smalltalk.
I know that most of the users don't know smalltalk but it's the best OOP you can code with. And geohash is such a great algorithm. Lovely combination2 -
When your code won't fucking work ... Its because you need light chacra reset with a light worker for only 70$ 😆 wtf messenger shut the fuckup
2 -
Ever since humans transitioned from hunting-gathering to farming, cats saved an unimaginable number of people. Dogs are fine at hunting and guarding the household, but they’re not sneaky enough to catch mice.
Mice destroying your food stash meant death by starvation for your whole family, no exceptions. Only something as agile, sneaky and alert as a house cat could catch mice effectively.4 -
Do a simple fucking thing ... Hoo no that cross origin shit protection XD i know the utility of this protection but in dev damm just shut the fuck up and work
-
I play simulator games. Mostly Cities : Skylines or The Sims 4. But no matter how stressed I am an hour in the gym gets me back on the horse...
If all fails I binge watch cringe compilations, cats or dogs compilation, Conan's show... Craig's show.. on youtube...! -
One day i do some code at home and i commit it ... Back to my office i realise its not my last version of my branch ... Fml ... Git push1
-
!devRant
Be me on vacation ~1500 miles from home
Board dogs like normal
Oldest dog (13y) gets sick
Boarding people take to vet as requested
Vet calls saying he is vomiting "coffee grounds" (that means he is bleeding into his stomach)
Won't be back until next Sunday
May have to bury dog when I get back.2 -
Ideal dev job would be to work on pretty/girly fashion or cosmetics websites, have drama free and knowledgeable co-workers, decent salary, great organization, external training opportunities, cute modern office, dogs, cats and a cafe on site, a dope recharge room & no talking to clients ever.4
-
You know I am becoming a firm believer of us all walking to the houses of people with dogs
Squatting down on their front step and dropping a deuce and then pissing all over their fucking lawns and greenery!!5 -
People should take their fireworks and shove them up their asses. I finally understand how cats and dogs feel on new years. Except I'm not a dog but, a frightened parent, scared of my kids being woken up by bangs and flashes!6
-
I have a nice desk, but my dogs insist that I work sitting on the floor with them. Just in case y’all were wondering who the bitch is in my house. It’s me.1
-
Some hint on how to take an php 3 old code and transform it to php 7.3 without rewrite all the class ...
Like an auto converters or i dont know ?11 -
So, working on real multi language support today I was searching for countries and country-codes. Yes this one is easy peasy. Also easy if you want every countryname in your supported languages.
But why is there no source for the states or provinces translated in every language. It's so hard to find...
Anyone knows a source for it? Is it worth to create a project for such translations?1 -
My countries {South Africa} new favourite thing, you get a mail from a reqcruiter stating they have an opportunity for you and want you to forward your CV in Word format.
Dunno about you countries, but in mine 'word' is code for 'make it easier for use to fuck it up with the template we stole from the dogs shit after it ate its owners homework'.
So I rpelied ot one of them simply asking if I should not first be interestd in the position before them requesting my CV.
They basically typed out a longer version of the original mail, I still do not know what this great opportunity is that they want my CV for and not replying again. lol5 -
It is usual in business to do backend code with 0 basic Interface to enter data or seeing data ? Or anything else .. im fullstack but i don't want to make onnllyyy backend ... When vuejs look at me with petty3
-
!Rant
So . . . for the first time ever I feel like I'm a part of something I genuinely care about. I'm a Unity3D VR developer, albeit for a small company, which has me in and out of VR constantly most days as I test things. Pretty cool right?
Well here's the thing. For me . . . what I do is trivial in meaning. I love what I do, don't get me wrong, but what's so good about what I do, is that I am a valued team member. My opinion is heard, I am given freedom to innovate, and most importantly I am allowed to create!
So what did I do today? I started building a UI framework for Unity3D, the beginning of which dynamically binds zenject signals to UI elements, like a button's onClick for example. If anyone here has worked with Unity3D you probably can attest to the festering heap of dogs vomit that is Unity UI....2 -
University : you know with remote working no-body know if you really work at home. For that reason you cannot remote work on shiti snowy dangerous day.
Covid-19 joined the conversation
University : look how its fun to remote working ! Is the new technology of the century... Now everybody in quarantine can work at home and the business lose nothing.
Me: yeah you bet mother fucker
University: don't take it like that is a gift.
Me: i will take it like a gift if you give it to me before the apocalypse fucker ...2 -
If you dont know what to put in a oracle TNS string ... Its ok ... Nobody know what to put in this shit
-
Can you take this JavaScript file and make it TypeScript with tree shaking. Step one pass week to understand TypeScript and webpackShit compilers and try to importe it in a basic chrome windows ... What a mess10
-
Just patching shit from other unknown Junior dev is depressing ... Its like i can do operations but i kill 80% of my patients do you want a try ? If you dont know what you doing please just take time to get a small formation at least thx2
-
Story of two poor puppies
when my mom returned from market, she saw a puppy with her
siblings surrounded by people choosing which one to take.
she pick one puppy. she's color is grayish black puppy with the tip
of his tail and a place in she's neck.
she whined and cried when she separated from her siblings and Mom.
but she quickly familiarize herself with the new family and place.
she was very happy when we bring her sister we found in the same place.
I take care of them.
I feed, wash and play with the new friends.
we built them a house. they were very happy and playful.
but things started to go downhill all of a sudden.
my parents start to prevent me from playing with them.
they say " We bring the puppies for them to be guards ".
they really hate dogs. they started to lock
the house and the window. they had to pass all day in the
same place
(How BORING) they pee there, eat there sleep there.
Since me and my sis prevented from take care of them, we couldn't
do anything all this only to make them cruel dogs and very unfriendly
to people.
when time pass, they started to forget them.
before yesterday, we remembered that we didn't
give them any food or water for the past 3 DAYS !!!
my sister unlock the door for them and they get out
from the house (~Prison~). they were completely
different. the gray puppy was very tired and depressed
and unhealthily skinny. the sister was fine.
we let them outside for few days when the gray puppy
started to get more and more skinny.
he lies on the floor all the day, when we are nearby, she
only wag it's tail no more.
Today, I wake up only to hear the bad story
the gray puppy, well we found her 0x00DEAD ! ! ! !
immediately after I heard the phrase, I burst into tears
I really couldn't stop crying. I couldn't even see that
cute face 0x00DEAD.
My sister's case was way worse than me. the is still
crying at the time of writing. we didn't see their funeral.
the other puppy was very sad because of her sibling
The Worst part is, we didn't name them or take ANY
photo with them !!! :`(2 -
Went to girlfriends family. Tablet not functional (screen doesn't work anymore), laptop stayed at home.
So smartphone is my only connection to Internet.
I would like to code something so much...
I think I've now read every rant here...5 -
Interview tooday im so fucking nervous again ... In Québec city the job you can have without a car is so fucking NullPointerException1
-
Trying to put translation in a drupal 8 project with
Content type => Paragraphs type => paragraphs type.
Wtf i need to translate in witch level OMG.
😭🔫1 -
Why people do that shit ? is a free backdoor to sniff other user content XD
if(isset($_COOKIE["user"])){
resetSession("user","user");
}
function resetSession($cookiename,$sessionname){
$_SESSION[$sessionname] = $_COOKIE[$cookiename];
}8 -
When i work on wordpress the only thing i see is . LOOK that pro version of the plugins ... Pop up Everywhere 👎🤮1
-
When you play on lagacy shit spaghetti monster code with a fucking ass crack boss don't understand anything and bullshit you (yaya that code is perfect) !
I just want to drop that fucking job full of shit
Week 2 😂🤣😭 8 months come2 -
Try to enter a new password limited to 16character ... Why ... Password is use to be secure with encryption. Someone can explain!2
-
Want to give money to an open source project ... I want give 20$ CAN ... ok the teams will receive 2€ ... Fuck canada3
-
Its normal if i drop some eyedrop at my new job ? My boss don't know anything of is network ... Cannot help me with noting no code no net... All the code is done already is a deep shit full of breach im fucking solo in a room face a brick wall no window ! Can i stay for 10 month at this place ?
Need to coding but have no cluse how to connect to a fucking database no user no password ...
Its the fucking hell here 👿😢3 -
Years ago I made a meme about eating dogs.
My detractors have continued to hound me to this very day. -
D3 software tutorials at best
Press ctrl+D . G . Z . RMC .S . Move mouse . RMC . TAB . Select vex . E . RMC . S . Mouve mouse
Then Alt+Z see your vex
Then P to cut the Shift+L to select node .
Omg ... Wtf it worst then Vim or wat XD -
Tooday i try to migrate a Drupal 7 to Drupal 8 ... I think that migrate module from drupal8 will work easily... But i remember on Drupal, noting work as expected on this Platform... I run the migration and suprise suprise content type field are off or empty and I don't have any data imported ...
Go to reports check the error message ... Try to get information on Internet hoo yes i remember no fucking documentation anywhere because Yolo i need to release 1626 modules that in beta or alpha after 5 years of development. And i dont give shit anymore.
Now i try use migrate_plus and tools to make my custom importation... Documentation not found or not finish ... Please omg please just shutup and work1 -
Try to teach to my girlfriend what is a class and what is a object.
Class is methods and attributes
My girlfriend starting sing "dans l'attribut de Dana" 😂🤣
Course is finish for today 🤣6 -
I'm late to programming, took me some years of working for dumbasses in the building industry to realise that i was meant for it.
When I left high school I thought that technology would never be a career on my old and undeveloped hometown (still isn't but i never contemplated the fact of moving to other county back there)
Glad to finally realise it :) being able to be proud of your work and to build something meaningful is great.
Also, to be able to work from home and hang out with my dogs is the best :)4 -
Vinegar didn't work, time to test honey.
Let's see if autocomplete is nice enough to persuade some of these mongrels to evolve from dogs to chimps and actually document the code they write.
1 -
{{ if (and (or (isset .Params "title") (isset .Params "caption")) (isset .Params "attr")) }}
Wait a minute hugo wtf is that7 -
Hyper-V have one job and fail it ... Fuck micro$hit product ! Install Ubuntu on hyper-v lag as fuck ... Why why you do that mother fucker2
-
My father lost is password of is google account =_= TFA need phone number ... but the phone is lock ... cannot format the phone because of FRP ... technologie is so shit these time...11
-
Cats and dogs - I interact with both in my uni and love both of them (yea well guess which one of them actually reciprocates the love).
I'm kinda having a tough time deciding which one do I keep in my Avatar.
@dfox please add an option with both of 'em fuckers3 -
Oh man, why is there no good api for ocr in PDFs? Once you are searching for this kind you will only find some kind of tesseract.
Why doesn't have Amazon an api for this???3 -
maybe I've changed
I'd get jump scared from suddenly barking dogs trying to bite me...
Today I got surprised
Surprised by the fact that what I felt this time wasn't fear.
I felt hate, hatred so vile and bloodthirsty it instantly triggered a bug-eyed kobenz, murderously eyeballing the mutt
for the first time in my life a dog owner pulled back the leash and scolded their hellspawn
Cats are so much nicer
---
I hadn't, yet, taken my adhd meds thou, so maybe that's what bipolar BPD people do because now I'm actually surprised with my reaction4 -
Ya tu qu'elle qu'un qui sais si vuejs et PWA marche bien ensemble ? Je veux bien me tiré une bûche puis tester tout sa !8
-
We've got new TV for monitoring, which auto-rotating meme page you like ? Cats, dogs, dank (sfw), dev, testing. Gimme yours !!! :)1
-
I cannot take this anymore ... The picture on desktop and mobile is not crop equally ....... Please next time I receive that i kill myself. Im so tired of this shit
-
I feel no motivation until we're past this fucked up hump and all the tech that is relevant and theory that was kind of crap remains the same and in the same foreground position and all the chommies die or go away.
I can't even finish the next line of code I know I already wrote to spawn a crap ton of md5 and file structure scans for quick disk vs disk inventory.
that i knew actually worked.
i mean if i hide proof this time period existed in teh fucking woods again they'd just use dogs to find it.
guess its time to make news.1 -
I pass my weekends working on 15 years of picture not classify .... Its 3am and im on it ... Jezuz cry
-
made 2 websites that fetch pictures of dogs and cats from 2 public api's
https://satvik.ninja/cat-pics
https://satvik.ninja/dog-pics1 -
Shit microshiote annonce ModernOS ... ready for shit version of windows ? Because one of 2 windows is shit !4
-
Let the dogs out, smoke a clove, watch some metal videos, have a eureka moment, go back inside and code.
-
Legacy code horror story.
I had to work on code designed to identify dogs... didn't go well:
https://i.imgur.com/32IXo6Y.gifv
(Credit to reddit: https://co.reddit.com/r/...) -
People all over the world own dogs as pets. In some places in the world people eat dogs.
Is it okay to feed your pet dog the scraps left over from eating dog?
I also pointed out to a coworker that New York has huge rats. I then said: "street steak".
The response was: "Why?!"2 -
When one thing append ( girlfriend bios brick ).. all the shit append at the same time ( HDD badsector, production fuk up, migration that work on local not work on production, etc ) this week is shit jezzz4
-
So my current company held a dev showcase last week. It was an event to show the different projects/tech stacks that different teams are working on/with. There's about 12-14 teams in our company. My team lead and I were brainstorming ideas on what to show on our booth. And I told him, I have an Intel RealSense developer kit that we can use. Anyway, fast forward to the day before the event, I was still developing our app/game for the booth. Just an emotion detector and you have to trick the app with your facial expressions. (Weird and fun, I know). The head honcho walked past the team lead and I and looked over the demo that I was playing around and he said that: "That's not work. You're wasting time again."
We were both irritated by his comments because he's one of the top dogs in the company and he surely knows about the event. Also, it's our way of showing to him that we're flexible in doing fun stuff instead of just enterprise and internal systems!
What a fucking kill joy! -
Anytime I run a game on my laptop, the game crashes. COD is working fine, Far cry 4 and watch dogs 2 are running without audio and games like forza horizon and others are not even running. I have gtx 940 4gb on top of i5 6gen.
can anybody help?8 -
I've been thinking, and i feel like being the bad guy... So, for now, I'm also an "idea guy" if you know what i mean...
Idea: This site could have a feature like "product recommandations" (just like long rants or something [tyical idea guy saying]), where users could recommend stuff like programs, peripherials, or anything dev related.
This could be done using tags, like certain tags would get sorted into the "product recommandations".
Sounds nice, doesn't it?
(PS.: We should also make a site which is like google, trust me, it would make millions...) -
At job. I open old project I don't make. Nice i made with scss for clarity ! That guy put all is css in a scss file and compile them ... For fuck sake1
-
Nobody where are authorized to do remote working
Covid-19 : everybody look how its fun to do remote working ....
Ya 🖕 please -
All students building are close to stop the propagation of the virus. But you web developer are an essential services you need to be there for two week to make an remote course system in 2 week 😆🤭3
-
I try to do some C# on VSCode and i dont understand why my nuget package won't working ... I just try to install sqlite . 😔1
-
Sometime when you try to stay in a friends relation but you are the only one take news from this friends all the time... And i move to Quebec city and no fucking one in 3 years come to see my new home in weekend ... 😑
Well fuck off 😃 -
Are people really this predictable now ? If so is it because they're used to accepting instruction on how to act down to the minute being baited and trained like dogs ? Or is this natural to everyone ?
I sure as hell didn't grow up like them
But they're idiocy started kind of awhile ago27
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