Whelp, there goes my monthly data allowance. Accidentally ran `npm install` while sitting at the car dealership on my hotspot.

I had to do some work in an older C# repo. I see git is automatically ignoring each new class I add. After scouring the .gitignore file, I see this entry put in by one of my colleagues.

Yeah, if my so called "friends" can just stop making me feel guilty for staying in with my son instead of going out having beers in pretentious clubs, with music blasting at a billion decibels that we can't even have a decent conversation.

If you could just stop; that would be great.

I'm sorry I have to work. I'm sorry I can't leave my 6 year old alone in the house on a school night. I'm sorry I don't have an army of maids to look after him. I'm sorry I don't have personal drivers to take him to school. I'm sorry if your family or your wife's family is so fucking rich you're basically a kept man and now bored out of your wits.

Please, just fuck off with this toxic behavior. We are not in our 20s anymore.

Thank you.

Ever been tasked with a modification, you see the code and think WTF??!!!??

Yes it was me who wrote it, what was I thinking? So I going to have to refactor this rubbish, so I set about tidying it up and realise that this is far more complex than I remember. When I finally get to grips with every aspect of it, I come to the conclusion that actually this is quite clever.

Straight up removed the changes, walked away from the original code and got on with what I was supposed to be doing to start with. Oh well, guess I got to grips with something I had forgotten.

I just wanna show you guys our branches.

Let's play a game.....

One is Google Chrome. The other is a Microsoft Browser.

Choose Wisely.

You fuckin sell $1000 wix site?🖕

Why are most developers/software engineers so absolutely fucking shit at their craft?

I understand incompetence exists in every occupation but it seems in development the ratio of bad developers to good developers is like 9:1. There’s a serious lack of quality in this industry and it’s only further exacerbated by coding bootcamps and orgs like general assembly pumping out more dog shit

Boss 1: You have such a dedicated team of workers, how do you make them all come in time?
Boss 2: Its simple, 30 employees, 20 parking spaces.

The biggest challenge I face at work is having to sit in one place and work all day. Office feels like a prison. I miss working from home.

Ah, just followed a 35-line tutorial to create a window with a line in it using xlib.

Time to put "Professional Linux Graphical Developer" in the olde resume

Don't know if this has already been put up, but I got a good laugh from it

Website design philosophies:

Apple: "...and a really big picture there, and a really big picture there, and a really big picture there, and..."

Microsoft: "border-radius:0 !important;"

Google: "EVERYTHING MOVES!!! And most websites get material design. Most."

Amazon: "We're slowly moving away from 2009"

Wix: "How can we further increase load times?"

Literally any download site: "Click here! No, click here! Nononono!! Click here!!..."

Facebook: "We can't change anything because our main age demographic is around 55"

University websites: "That information isn't hard enough to find yet. Decrease the search accuracy and increase broken links."

😥😥😥😥

Client: Can I speak to the developer responsible for my website?
Developer: Speaking...
Client: You have a deep voice for a 5 year old.

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