Join devRant
Do all the things like
++ or -- rants, post your own rants, comment on others' rants and build your customized dev avatar
Sign Up
Get a devDuck
Rubber duck debugging has never been so cute! Get your favorite coding language devDuck
Buy Now
-
This code review gave me eye cancer.
So, first of all, let me apologize to anyone impacted by eye cancer, if that really is a thing... because that sounds absolutely horrible. But, believe me, this code was absolutely horrible, too.
I was asked to code review another team's script. I don't like reviewing code from other teams, as I'm pretty "intense" and a nit-picker -- my own team knows and expects this, but I tend to really piss off other people who don't expect my level of input on "what I really think" about their code...
So, I get this script to review. It's over 200 lines of bash (so right away, it's fair game for a boilerplate "this should be re-written in python" or similar reply)... but I dive in to see what they sent.
My eyes.
My eyes.
MY EYES.
So, I certainly cannot violate IP rules and post any of the actual code here (be thankful - be very thankful), but let me just say, I think it may be the worst code I've ever seen. And I've been coding and code-reviewing for upwards of 30 years now. And I've seen a LOT of bad code...
I imagine the author of this script was a rebellious teenager who found the google shell scripting style guide and screamed "YOU'RE NOT MY REAL DAD!" at it and then set out to flagrantly violate every single rule and suggestion in the most dramatic ways possible.
Then they found every other style guide they could, and violated all THOSE rules, too. Just because they were there.
Within the same script... within the SAME CODE BLOCK... 2-space indentation... 4-space indentation... 8-space indentation... TAB indentation... and (just to be complete) NO indentation (entire blocks of code within another function of conditional block, all left-justified, no indentation at all).
lowercase variable/function names, UPPERCASE names, underscore_separated_names, CamelCase names, and every permutation of those as well.
Comments? Not a single one to be found, aside from a 4-line stanza at the top, containing a brief description of that the script did and (to their shame), the name of the author. There were, however, ENTIRE BLOCKS of code commented out.
[ In the examples below, I've replaced indentation spacing with '-', as I couldn't get devrant to format the indentation in a way to suitably share my pain otherwise... ]
Within just a few lines of one another, functions defined as...
function somefunction {
----stuff
}
Another_Function() {
------------stuff
}
There were conditionals blocks in various forms, indentation be damned...
if [ ... ]; then
--stuff
fi
if [ ... ]
--then
----some_stuff
fi
if [ ... ]
then
----something
something_else
--another_thing
fi
And brilliantly un-reachable code blocks, like:
if [ -z "$SOME_VAR" ]; then
--SOME_VAR="blah"
fi
if [ -z "$SOME_VAR" ]
----then
----SOME_VAR="foo"
fi
if [ -z "$SOME_VAR" ]
--then
--echo "SOME_VAR must be set"
fi
Do you remember the classic "demo" programs people used to distribute (like back in the 90s) -- where the program had no real purpose other than to demonstrate various graphics, just for the sake of demonstrating graphics techniques? Or some of those really bad photo slideshows, were the person making the slideshow used EVERY transition possible (slide, wipe, cross-fade, shapes, spins, on and on)? All just for the sake of "showing off" what they could do with the software? I honestly felt like I was looking at some kind of perverse shell-script demo, where the author was trying to use every possible style or obscure syntax possible, just to do it.
But this was PRODUCTION CODE.
There was absolutely no consistency, even within 1-2 adjacent lines. There is no way to maintain this. It's nearly impossible even understand what it's trying to do. It was just pure insanity. Lines and lines of insanity.
I picture the author of this code as some sort of hybrid hipster-artist-goth-mental-patient, chain-smoking clove cigarettes in their office, flinging their own poo at their monitor, frothing at the mouth and screaming "I CODE MY TRUTH! THIS CODE IS MY ART! IT WILL NOT CONFORM TO YOUR WORLDLY STANDARDS!"
I gave up after the first 100 lines.
Gave up.
I washed my eyes out with bleach.
Then I contacted my HR hotline to see if our medical insurance covers eye cancer.33 -
How it should be:
- First: solve the problem
- Second: Write your code.
How many people do:
- First: Write code
- Second: solve code problems
- Third: Adapt code with requirements
- Forth: get lost on your spaghetti code
- Sixth: make a suicide7 -
Future Teller: Your bad code and unhappy behavior will last till you're 30.
Me[curiously]: and after 30?
FT: You'll get used to it.3 -
When your colleagues have no tests for their code and tell you not to touch it, because it WORKS!
15 -
Has anyone ever looked over the code that they wrote like two years ago and just felt embarrassed of how bad it is?10
-
A good programmer can get more done than 10 bad programmers, but a bad programmer's code can keep 10 good programmers busy for years.
~ Ed Weissman8 -
If you thought your legacy code was bad, this is what I'm dealing with. The below SQL is stored in a cookie on login and executed to on every further request to determine the user / privileges.
15 -
Sometimes I wish I was allowed to just strangle my colleagues...
Example from the 'code base':
try:
do_something()
except Exception as e:
log(e)
do_something()
When I asked why they would redo the same call right after it failed I was told that 'It works the second time because it takes time to raise the Exception '.
Bitch, you've got a race condition in your sensitive banking software. You know it's there. Do you really want to trust the time needed to raise your exception will always be enough to synch that dumpster fire you call code?
Show some fucking respect for your craft and fix that shit. But of course they won't, because it will work flawlessly until it suddenly stops working. Taking down who knows what in this damn, undocumenred monolith with it....
Sometimes I'm honestly afraid to trust banks with my money.7 -
when you had to maintain some stranger's shitty codebase, and you couldn't resist looking up his name on LinkedIn, then you found his profile which says he is a Rockstar coder
8 -
About two years ago I get roped into a something when someone was requesting an $8000 laptop to run an "program" that they wrote in Excel to pull data from our mainframe.
In reality they are using our normal application that interacts with the mainframe and screen scrapping it to populate several Excel spreadsheets.
So this guy kept saying that he needed the expensive laptop because he needed the extra RAM and processing power for his application. At the time we only supported 32 bit Windows 7 so even though I told him ten times that the OS wouldn't recognize more than 3.5 GB of RAM he kept saying that increasing the RAM would fix his problem. I also explained that even if we installed the 64 bit OS we didn't have approval for the 64 bit applications.
So we looked at the code and we found that rather than reusing the same workbook he was opening a new instance of a workbook during each iteration of his loop and then not closing or disposing of them. So he was running out of memory due to never disposing of anything.
Even better than all of that, he wanted a faster processor to speed up the processing, but he had about 5 seconds of thread sleeps in each loop so that the place he was screen scrapping from would have time to load. So it wouldn't matter how fast the processor was, in the end there were sleeps and waits in there hard coded to slow down the app. And the guy didn't understand that a faster processor wouldn't have made a difference.
The worst thing is a "dev" that thinks they know what they are doing but they don't have a clue.7 -
<rant data-type="corny">
My Gf of 3 years left me for some douche. Thus said, she "removed" her feelings before kissing him. WTF! I didn't know feeling came like dependencies...
</rant>9 -
Today I got my programming test back. 50/50 points. I only deserved 40 of them, since I wrote horrible code, so I told the teacher "I don't understand my points." His reply: "I also don't understand." I was laughing for at least 5 minutes 😂8
-
So I was at work and send to another location (distribution centers) and in the lunch break my guider for that day and I started a conversation about servers etc (he appeared to do loads of stuff with that). He recommended me all those programs but I didn't recognize anything so I asked him what kinda servers he ran. He runs a lot of Windows servers. No problem for me but I told him that I am into Linux servers myself.
Guy: "Linux guy, eh? That system is considered to be so secure but in reality it's insecure as fuck!".
Me: (If he would come up with real/good arguments I am not going to argue against that by the way!) Uhm howso/why would you think that?
Guy: "Well all those script kiddies being able to execute code on your system doesn't seem that secure.".
*me thinking: okay hold on, let's ask for an explanation as that doesn't make any fucking sense 😐*
Me: "Uhm how do you mean, could you elaborate on that?"
Guy: "Well since it's open source it allows anyone to run any shit on your system that they'd like. That's why windows rocks, it doesn't let outsiders execute bad code on it.".
Seriously I am wondering where the hell he heard that. My face at that moment (internally, I didn't want to start a heated discussion): 😐 😲.
Yeah that was one weird conversation and look on open source operating systems...25 -
Can't fall asleep because of unfinished code...
Wake up at 03:00 AM because of nightmares about bad code...
Too tired to finish code or rewrite bad code :'(7 -
Oh I sure hate working on other people their code. This is one of the gems I found, but this project contains stuff worse than this. Literally most of the class names aren't even proper according to the naming conventions
27 -
Hello everyone, this is my first time here so hi! I want to tell you all a story about my current situation.
At 18 while in the military I was able to get my first computer, it was a small hp pavilion laptop with windows 7. The system would crash constantly, even though I would only use it for googling stuff and using fb to talk to people. 5 months after I got it and continuously hated it decided to find out why and who could I blame (other than myself) for the system making me do the ctrl alt del dance all the time....
Found out that there are people called computer programmers that made software. Decided to give it a go since I had some free time most days. Started out with c++ because it was being recommended in some websites. Had many "oh deeeeer lord" moments. After not getting much traction I decided to move to Java which seemed like an easier step than C++. Had fun, but after some verbosity I decided to move into more dynamic lands. Tried JS and since at the time there was no Node and I was not very into the idea of building websites I decided to move into Python, Ruby, PHP and Perl and had a really great time using and learning all of them. I decided to get good in theoretical aspects of computer programming and since I had a knack for math I decided to get started with basic computer science concepts.
I absolutely frigging loved it. And not only that, but learning new things became an obsession, the kind that would make me go to bed at 02:40 am just to wake up at 04:00 or 06:00 because the military is like that. I really wanted to absorb as much as I could since I wanted to go to college for it and wanted to be prepared since I did not wanted to be a complete newb. Took Harvard CS50, Standford Programming 101 with Java, Rice's Python course and MIT's Python programming class. I had so much fun I don't regret it one bit.
By the time I got to college I had already made the jump to Linux and was an adept Arch user, Its not that it was superior or anything, but it really forced me to learn about Linux and working around a terminal and the internals of the system to get what I want. Now a days I settle for Fedora or Debian based systems since they are easier and time is money.
Uni was a breeze, math was fun and the programming classes seemed like glorified "Hello World" courses. I had fun, but not that much fun, most of my time was spent getting better at actual coding. I am no genius, nor my grades were super amazing(I did graduate with honors though) but I had fun, which never really happened in school before that.
While in school I took my first programming gig! It was in ASP.NET MVC, we were using C#, I got the job through a customer that I met at work, I was working in retail during the time and absolutely hated it. I remember being so excited with the gig, I got to meet other developers! Where I am from there aren't that many and most of them are very specialized, so they only get concerned with certain aspects of coding (e.g VBA developers.....) and that is until I met the lead dev. He was by far one of the biggest assholes I had ever met in my life. Absolutely nothing that I would do or say made hem not be a dick. My code was steady, but I would find bugs of incomplete stuff that he would do, whenever I would fix it he would belittle me and constantly remind me of my position as a "junior dev" in the company saying things as "if you have an issue with my code or standards tell me, but do not touch the code" which was funny considering that I would not be able to advance without those fixes. I quit not even 3 months latter because I could not stand the dick, neither 2 of the other developers since the immediately resigned after they got their own courage.
A year latter I was able to find myself another gig. I was hesitant for a moment since it was another remote position in which I had already had a crappy experience. Boy this one was bad. To be fair, this was on me since I had to get good with Lumen after only having some exposure to Laravel. Which I did mentioned repeatedly even though he did offer to train me in order to help him. Same thing, after a couple of weeks of being told how much I did not know I decided to get out.
That is 2 strikes.
So I waited a little while and took a position inside another company that was using vanilla PHP to build their services. Their system was solid though, the lead engineer remains a friend and I did learn a lot from him. I got contracted because they were looking for a Java developer. The salary was good. But when I got there they mentioned that they wanted a developer in Java...to build Android. At the time I was using Java with Spring so I though "well how hard can this be! I already use Android so the love for the system is there, lets do this!" And it was an intense, fun and really amazing experience.
-- To be continued.10 -
Me today at class, doing a group work, while suddenly I saw my colleague’s code looking very odd.
Me : “Why is your code like that?”
Her : “Like what?”
Me : “Its not spaced correctly... look its way over there”
Her : “Oh well, I just like it like that, its my style”
Me “...”
And im just like, if she post her code at SO, she wouldve been eaten alive...22 -
If you ever come across a Java codebase with capitalized method names, RUN. I should've taken this advice years ago.
-
HOW TO KILL A DEVELOPER
Coworker: Hey, is http://website down for you?
Me: yeah. What's up?
Coworker: Ah, that explains why my tests are failing.
Me, internally fuming: It would be good test practice to not depend directly on external services.
Coworker: I know, but this is easier.
This makes my blood boil. I'm not a huge fan of mocking and stubbing everything, but when it's actually very easy to mock something and you're too lazy, that makes me fucking angry.
Remember kids: doing it right takes longer than doing it wrong. But doing it wrong will eventually take significantly more of your time. Just wait until your shitty assumptions fail and you don't have any recourse.6 -
Yet another story from a dev friend of mine:
He was assigned to a client(he works at an agency, this was a new client) to add some trivial functionality(a share button) to their web app. It was planned as a short task(1 day).
Then he got the source code.
THEIR ENTIRE BACKEND WAS A SINGLE PHP 3 FILE with over 100000 LOC(He couldn't even open it in anything other then vim).
This monstrosity created all the HTML with inline styles everywhere&JS. State was determined with a whole bunch of cookies(one of which was 'admin' and GET parameters, which had no input sanitation whatsoever (obviously vulnerable to sqli).
And there were two comments in this
file:
"TODO: add documentation"
and
"Don't touch this"
When asked why this ungodly beast was created, the client said they didn't want to have long URLs, they wanted everything to be on index.php
1) WHY?
2) WHO WROTE THIS SHIT?
3) HOW?
At least they agreed to let my friends agency rebuild their website.
Also, why does my friend literally work with the shittiest I ever heard of?5 -
When the code is so bad that the only meaningful thing to do should be executing
rm -Rf *; git add -A; git commit -m "bugfix"
and then start the project again.4 -
You know the code is in bad shape when you see variables starting with "get":
Integer getDataBlockSize;4 -
Warning: long read....
I got a call this morning from a client who was panicking about not being able to login to his web panel.
So I went to the web panel and tried to login and was just redirected back to the login page. No errors or anything (at least visible on the page). Went looking for an error_log file and found it.
It turns out there was an error was showing: Disk quota exceeded.
So I went into the cPanel and checked, he used about 16GB out of 100GB and that got me confused. So I looked around and found out he was using about 510000/500000 inodes.
Went looking trough FTP to see where he has so many files and try and remove some.
Well it turns out that there were about 7 injected websites (warez, online casino, affiliate one etc) and a full hacking web panel on his FTP. After detailed analysis some who actually built the site (I just maintain some parts) made an upload form available to public with any checks on it. Meaning anyone could upload whatever they wanted and the form would allow it.
The worst part is that the client is not allowing us to secure the form with some sort of login or remove it completely (the best option) as it is not really needed but he uses it to upload some pdf catalogs or something.
TL; DR;
Old programmer created an upload form that was accessible to anyone on the web without adding any security or check as to see what kind of files was getting uploaded. Which lead to having maximum number on inodes used on server and client being unable to login.
Side note:
And ofc I had to go and fix the mess behind him again, even though he stopped working a long time ago and I started just recently and have been having nightmares of this project.2 -
I’m surrounded by devs that use the light theme in IntelliJ. It triggers me more than any bad code 😂😂😂5
-
Writing bad code has its perks.
Whenever you are hungry you only have to write a few lines of code and you get some spaghetti3 -
This was on a key cutting machine at the range:
1) They use XP
2) They use Java
3) It was touch screen so I could have gotten up an on screen keyboard and actually used the command prompt
7 -
Before I learned how to code and people said that you should print hello world I thought they really meant hook it up to a printer and print it on paper1
-
Sometimes dirty code is more efficient than clean code.
If features get dropped frequently and requirements change every few days, writing best-practices, tested code is wasted time. Learned that in my first job where I thought the other devs were all bad. Until I realized their bad code pays my salary, and my clean code takes more time to develop.6 -
So Friday afternoon is always deployment time at my company. No sure why, but it always fucks us.
Anyways, last Friday, we had this lovely deployment that was missing a key piece. On Wednesday I had tested it, sent out an email(with screenshots) saying "yo, whoever wrote this, this feature is all fucked up." Management said they would handle it.
The response email. 1(out of 20) defects I sent in were not a defect but my error. No further response, so I assume the rest were being looked into.
In a call with bossman, my manager states that the feature is fixed, so I go to check it quickly before the deployment(on Friday).
THERE IS NO FUCKING CODE CHECK-IN. THE DEV BASTARD JUST SAID THAT MY USECASE WAS WRONG, SO MY ENTIRE EMAIL WAS INVALID.
I am currently working on Saturday, as the other guy refuses to see the problem! It is blatant, and I got 3 other people to reproduce to prove I am not crazy!
On top of that, the code makes me want to vomit! I write bad code. This is like a 3rd grader who doesn't know code copy-pasted from stack overflow! There is literally if(A) then B else if(!A) then B! And a for loop which does some shit, and the line after it closes has a second for loop that iterates over the same unaltered set! Why?! On top of that, the second for loop loops until "i" is equal to length-1, then does something! Why loop???
The smartest part of him ran down his Mama's leg when it saw the DNA dad was contributing!
Don't know who is the culprit, and if you happen to see this, I am pissed. I am working on Saturday because you can't check your code or you lied on your resume to get this job, as you are not qualified! Fuck you!15 -
Found this gem yesterday...
function justNumber(BigDecimal n) {
string negative_sign = "-";
BigDecimal response = BigDecimal.valueOf(n.toString().replace(negative_sign, ""));
return response;
}15 -
Do you guys know any Github repos with really Bad C++ code?
Just wanna see if I can understand it, as a test... 🤔10 -
This guy who earns 20% more than me wrote a method to check which string of 2 is lexicographically smaller.
public boolean isSmaller(String s1, String s2) {
String [] temp = new String[2];
temp[0] = s1;
temp[1] = s2;
Collections.sort(temp);
if (temp[0].equalsIgnoreCase(s1)) {
return true;
}
else {
return false;
}
}7 -
I was asked by a client to code review their platform built in PHP. The platform was becoming slow and new features built by their current IT supplier broke existing features.
I gained access to the source code... One PHP file (index.php) containing about 80K lines of code... I am impressed and disgusted at the same time. 😂3 -
When it's dark outside all the time and the sun suddenly comes around.
Everyone's going crazy about it and walking outside.
Me: FUCK. How am I supposed to read my freakin code like that?!
*Me standing up and closing the shutter*1 -
Continuation from :
https://devrant.io/rants/835693/...
Hi everybody! I am sorry that as a first time poster I am building 2 long stories, but I really like the idea of connecting with other people here!
Well, as I was mentioning before, I got a job in Android development and had a blast with it. Me and the developer clicked and would spend our time discussing PHP, the move to other stacks (I was making him love the idea of Django or Spring Java) games, bands and cool stuff like that. This dude was my hero, his own stack was developed in a similar MVC fashion that he had implemented from scratch before for many projects. It was through him that I learned how to use my own code (rather than frameworks and other libraries) to build what I wanted. I seriously thought that I had it made with a position that respected me and placed me in the lead mobile development position of the company. Then it happened. He had taken 2 weeks of unauthorized leave, which was ok since he was best friends with the owner of the company, those 2 along another asshole started it so they could do whatever they wanted. And I could not make much progress without him being there since there were things that he needed to do, that I was not allowed, for me to continue. When he came back I was quickly rushed to the owner of the company's office to discuss my lack of progress. The lead developer was livid, as if he knew that he had fucked up. He blamed the whole thing on me (literally told the owner that it was my fault before I was summoned) and that we lost 2 weeks of business time because I did not had the initiative to make progress on my own. I felt absolutely horrible, someone that I had trusted and befriended doing something like that, I really felt like shit. I had mad respect and love for this guy. It got heated, I showed the owner the text messages in which I showed him my pleas to led me finish the parts that were needed while he was away. Funny enough, he acted betrayed. After that it was 3 months of barely talking to one another except for work related stuff. He got cold and would barely let me touch the internal code that he was developing. It was painful. The owner kept complaining about progress and demanded that I do a document scanner for the company, which was to be attached to their mobile application. Not only that but it had to be done with OpenCV. Now, CV is great, but it is its own area, it takes a while to be able to develop something nice with it that is efficient and not a shitstorm.
I had two weeks.
Finished in one. After burning my brain and ensuring that the c++ code was not giving issues and the project was steady I turned it in...to their dismay. And I say so because I felt that they gave me such a huge project with the intention of firing me if it was not done. After that it was constant shit from the owner and the lead developer. I was asked then to port the code to the IOS version. I had some knowledge of it already so I started working on it. Progress was fast since the initial idea was already there and I really love working on Apple devices. And when I was 70% done the owner decided to cut me loose. At first he cited things such as lack of funding and him being unable to pay my salary. I was fine with that even though I knew it was not true. So at the time I just nodded and thanked the company for my time there. Before I left, he decided to blame it on me, stating that if they were not producing money that it was perhaps my fault. I lost my shit, and started using my military voice to explain to him how a software company is normally ran. Then I stormed out.
It was known to me, that the lead developer had actually argued against me being laid off. And that he was upset about it, we made amends, but the fact remains that I was laid off because the owner did not think of me as an asset, regardless of how many times I worked alongside the lead developer or how valuable I was actually to the company, their infrastructure did get better while we worked together, so I just assumed that he never actually did any mention of my value.
I lasted 2 months without a job, feeling horribly shitty because my wife had to work harder to ensure our stability whilst I was without any sort of salary. At this time I had already my degree, so all I had to do was look better. In the meantime I decided to study more about other technologies. I learn React, and got way better at JS and Node that I thought I could and was finally able to get another job as a full stack developer for another company.
I have been here since 2 months. It has been weird, we do classic ASP, which is completely pointless at this time, but meh. At this time though, I just don't really have the same motivation. Its really hard for me to trust the people that I work with and would like to connect with more developers.21 -
In elementary my teacher gave me bad mark, because instead of painting house in Paint, I was trying to code6
-
I’ve never made any of my code open source, because I’m afraid that it’s so freaking bad someone will bash me for it, but I’m really trying my best.8
-
Did you fucking idiots think that I was gonna tell you to implement async await on the requests and not notice that you IMPLWMENTED GODDAMN SYSTEM-SLEEP YOU DESNE MOTHERFUCKEDS IT NOT TAKES 10X AS LONG AS MY OATCH TO JUST LIMIT THE NUMBER IF HTTP REQUESTS FOR FUCJS SAKE THIS CODE LOONS LIKE A RACCOON FUCKED AN MACBOOK THAT ALSO GOT FUCKED BY A GOAT FROM CHERNOBYL THAT SOMEHOW MUTATED TO A RACCOON GOAT 🐐 MACBOOK 💻 HYBRID ABOMINATION THAT IS NOW CLAWING MY EYES OUT AND GIVING ME RABIESCANCERAIDS5
-
The best part about being a teaching assistant in programming is the ability to bitch about bad code.
The worst part is all the bad code...2 -
Two questions:
Is over engineering code a good thing or a bad thing?
Is writing verbose code a good thing or a bad thing?11 -
Having pets is a good way to prepare yourself for working in a brown-field environment.
When your cat or dog shits on the floor, you get the same feeling as when you need to dive into a legacy code base.
You know you can't just leave it there, and yet you still want to find anything else to do except for touch the pile of shit in the middle of the room.
Meanwhile you know your users are going to end up trampling over it and mashing it into your carpet.
4 -
Not adding spaces in for statements.
ex) bad practice
for (i=0;i<10:i++)
{
//some code
}
ex) good practice
for (i = 0; i < 10; i++)
{
//some code
}10 -
Hey everyone. I decided to rewrite python's abs() function, as it's really slow. Here is my new and improved version. It's up to 500% faster!!!
def abs(int=None):
if not int is None:
try:
lnt = math.sqrt(int);
lnt = math.pow(lnt, 2);
return lnt;
except Exception as E:
lnt = int/-1;
return lnt;
else:
raise ValueError("oopsie whoopsie! uwu we made a fucky wucky!!1 a wittle fucko boingo! the code monkies at our headquarters are working VEWY HAWD to fix dis!!");
Edit: devrant fucked up the indention.
Here is a hastebin instead:
https://hastebin.com/iyajuyoxuq.pl9 -
If I disregard all Wordpress code examples, this must have been one of the best examples of bad code. It took minutes to understand what it does.
8 -
Last time I post my need-to-be-refactored code, I see some mean-but-useful comments.
Everyone's comments are like: "Look this stupid coder trying to be clever and write an idiotic code, let's bully him because we are better".
Ok guys, sorry for hurting your eyes, but please do it again...
I really want to know your opinion, especially on the part where I try to make the "if condition" more readable by defining some boolean variables.
29 -
Today I reached a point where I made an really bad looking, uneficient, unreadable function, but it works!, That's what counts right?!
Just kidding, I just couldn't fix it, hopefully the me from tomorrow will be smarter.7 -
When you look back at Code from your 2nd year of university...
Using while loops as if statements to check for vowels... *shudders in fear*
5 -
That feeling when a coworker screws up totally. doesn't accept it as their fault.
You look at the code and see so much of redundancy and bad practice galore.
You look at it for a while and think you can rewrite it from scratch. But you finally end up saying "fuck this" and feel hopeless because there is not enough time.
Hate that feeling. Hate it. Depresses.2 -
When a senior developer changes your impeccable code and pushes their ugly indented lines with bad naming scheme without review.
-
After typeing this:
interface IDeviceTypeTraitPropertyPropertyDefintionMap {
I feel like I need to take my self out behind the shed, for the good of humanity...3 -
So I've taken over a project, well, not really taken over, we've been hired to add more functionality to a Wordpress site.
I have never seen such a messy code in my life... variables have mixed languages, indentation is a mix of tabs, 2, 3 and 4 spaces, camelcase, snake case, short names, long names. ' and ", no spaces after commas (gotta save those bytes doode)
Almost like it has been copypasted from everywhere.
I think I said 10-15 hours for it. I think I will spend a lot more time tidying up this code.
Hey, look, 3 index files!!
index.php
index__backup.php
index__backup_2.php
I don't dare to look into the CSS or JS, but I know I have to3 -
Probably none but well bad one was Mozilla plugins reviewing my code . It took 2 days to review 100 lines of code !!!!.
-
For fucks sakes people.
Ocamms razor is a very helpful problem solving tool.
HOWEVER IT ISN'T AN EXCUSE FOR NOT HAVING A PROPER ARCHITECTURE, OR SHITTING ON IT, HAMMERING RANDOM IFs EVERYWHERE, USING A METRIC SHITTON OF MAGIC NUMBERS HAVING A LOT OF REDUNDANT CODE AND ZERO DOCUMENTATION!
YOU CAN'T DO THAT "just because it's the simplest solution"! NO. THAT'S JUST UNACCEPTABLE. YOU ARE A HORRIBLE PERSON.
GO TO HELL YOU STUPID SCUM WITH YOUR PILE OF CHOPSTICKS BURNING THAT IS YOUR CODEBASE!
But before that, would you mind touching these two wires definitely not connected to the mains?3 -
Looking through our gitlog today and see 3 PR's from our "lead developer". 2 of these were removing a single blank line from a class, and the 3rd was adding one back in. None of these had any title or commit messages on the PR's. This is a guy that talks down to everyone and deliberately makes other devs feel insignificant, saying he's too busy to write documentation and it's not needed because his uncommented code is self documenting. But hang on he's not too busy to waste time with pointless non-functional PR's that only remove a couple of blank lines? Scratching my head in disbelief that some devs think they can get away with shit like this. How about you drop the ego and actually try and work in collaboration with the other devs.2
-
I can't code
So 3 things i hate because i can't code. #selfrant
1. My father was a programmer in the 80-90ties. So he forced me at 11 years old to do a stupid "Java for Kids" book. You had to write sooooo much verbose code just that a stupid grey button would appear that looked ugly. I really really hated it.
2. Now I'm a graphic designer by trade. The first time I came in contact with something useful code related was in 2011. https://processing.org the generative design framework. It looked glorious! But it was in Java! I hated it.
3. I hate that i can't code because I'm dependend on you guys to get my design to become alive. Thanks to 3 years on devRant, the days arguing with a lazy dev that something can't be done is thankfully gone.8 -
Being a programmer in a scientific discipline can be infuriating.
using "no one" ="almost no one"
using everyone = "almost everyone"
1. No one knows what even the very idea of good practice is. And everyone refuses to learn. 3k lines of repetitive copy pasted main. 500 lines of plotting method.
2. Raw C-style pointer based array creation. Won't use develope array libraries because what if development stops. FUCKING HAVE YOU SEEN YOUR CODE WHAT IF DEVELOPMENT ON YOUR CODE STOPS. FUCK.
3. LOOP VARIABLES DECLARED AT THE BEGINNING OF THE METHOD WHY.
4. Everyone wants to make modular, independent code. No one wants to use OOP. NOPE. ALL IN ONE FILE. WRITE C++ LIKE A FUCKING PYTHON NOTEBOOK. FUCK.
5. LIBRARIES OH MY GOD PLEASE DO NOT CODE UP YOUR MATRIX MULTIPLICATION. PLEASE DO NOT TRIPLE LOOP IT. NO. THE LINEAR ALGEBRA LIBRARY WILL STAY IN DEVELOPMENT.
6. Please realize that literally not one comment over an 1800 line file does not help anyone.
FUCKING. WHY. WHY ARE WE SCIENTISTS SO GOOD AT SCIENCE AND SO FUCKING SHIT AT THE CODE THAT MAKES OUR SCIENCE HAPPEN. WHY. FUCKING. WHY. FUCK.4 -
When you thought writing code on paper in university was bad, wait till you apply to Google and have one of your interviews writing code in Google docs.6
-
Worst code I ever had to touch: a React application, createClass era, before redux was a thing, that had everything in one fucking component.
Every fucking thing.
This was a simple video chat application, but still. The component's code included:
- Views (contact list and video call screen) and logic to switch between them;
- All application state;
- API calls;
- Websocket message handling;
- WebRTC logic (getUserMedia and p2p streaming).
This app was built by one person in one month for a demo. That person left the company after the demo and I had to maintain that mess without zero React knowledge (I was doing angular at that time). On his last day he gave me a crash course and an overview of how the app worked.
Around that time I attended a few meetups and a conference with talks about React. That, my curiosity and ability to learn by refactoring helped me a lot when I had to add new features and fix bugs in that app.5 -
public class Main {
public static void main(String[] args) {
System.out.println("Hello, World!");
}
}
sorry for my messy code25 -
Knockout JS.
I am not sure if the library itself is so bad or the code which I was working on was ugly. But since then I avoid anything that is related to knockout js.10 -
You're a great coder only if you can deliberately write bad code that works but no one can understand.
-
Friend asks you to hack another friend's Instagram "cause you know how to code, right" == bad.
Friend asks you to hack their own Instagram cause they forgot their password == bad++1 -
I was looking at some poorly written code today in a project and I was curious to see who wrote it. I blamed it and found I had wrote it 6 months ago! smh Well... at least I know I'm getting better! I ended up refactoring it to use better code patterns.2
-
Come up with a bad version of flipping a bool's value. (value = !value)
I'll start with a bad way of doing it in C# (.NET):
char[] bca = boolWert.ToString();
if (bca.Length == 4 && bca[0] == 't' && bca[1] == 'r' && bca[2] == 'u' && bca[3] == 'e')
{
boolWert = !bool.Parse($"{bca[0]}{bca[1]}{bca[2]}{bca[3]}");
}
else if (bca.Length == 5 && bca[0] == 'f' && bca[1] == 'a' && bca[2] == 'l' && bca[3] == 's' && bca[4] == 'e')
{
boolWert = !bool.Parse($"{bca[0]}{bca[1]}{bca[2]}{bca[3]}{bca[4]}");
}
else throw new Exception("y e s");7 -
The people who allow bad code to pass through the review process are the biggest menace to humanity.6
-
First time I was screaming out of anger while looking at code.
I'm doing a group project in my university.
We are developing a indoor navigation Android app.
And a team mate of mine just merged this…
/*Method for help-feature.
Sets all the TouchEvents that are at least 400 ms long. This is made for all the relevant buttons or editTexts, which are seen on the mapView.
The case for mapView is needed because otherwise the other buttons, etc. wont work properly.*/
public void setButtonsForHelpDialog(){
View v = mapView;
switch (v.getId()) {
case R.id.mapview:
mapView.setOnTouchListener(…);
case R.id.buttonUp:
buttonOn.setOnTouchListener(…);
case R.id.buttonDown:
buttonDown.setOnTouchListener(…);
…
case R.id.description:
description.setOnTouchListener(…);
}}
The code is really aligned like this - no breaks. And it's even worse. There are if statements like if("constantly false var" == true). Which is highlighted by Android Studio.
This is done in a own class. The views are set via public member variables of this new class. The constant vars were added in the actual class holding the buttons and also stuff like this useless method
public void getDoStuff() {
doStuff()
}
And I could continue like this.
I never saw code this bad…
I can't even find words for it :/4 -
Programming commandment: Thou shall blame all bad code on thy comrade who has bequeathed your company!2
-
Found this in a third party library once. Only thing I can think is that this programmer was paid by the line. Because, seriously, this could have been one line.
1 -
What do you call poorly written code? The most common one is probably spaghetti, but here in Finland it's often called 'purkka' which means chewing gum, perhaps because it's sticky and difficult to get out of your hair.7
-
I just hate it when a co-worker says "AS LONG AS IT WORKS. It doesn't matter how you code it as long as it outputs what the client/user wants. They don't check how you code it anyway" *facepalm*
We effin' follow standards so that it will be convenient for everybody!
Bad code is still bad code if you don't follow standards even if it works.4 -
If got to do some bugfixing at work today.
Looking through code:
if (x !== undefined || x !== null){
I want the person who wrote this to wear the ugliest and scratchiest christmas sweater with "i write bad code" written on it15 -
Being told code is "production ready" only to find this:
if name == 'foo' or name == 'bar' or name == 'someothershit'
What's wrong with:
if name in ['foo','bar', 'someothershit']?
Oh and they had 10 different values they were matching, not just 3. What kind of joker am I dealing with?
1 -
Actual production code:
while(1):
//A few lines of code here with a conditional break.
while(1):
//More code.
Have you ever just had nested infinite loops...4 -
So I got this new job as Java developer, the people are really great but is the kind of companies that only takes care for fast results and not for code quality.
Because this I have to deal with libraries updated 4 years ago, classes with 8000 lines, methods with 500 lines, a WHOLE lot of work arounds because there is no time to really fix the issue unless it affects directly the customer (something not working or being really slow) aaand we use fucking svn.
Some of this practice's they know and encourage it (+1000 lines classes for example) and every time I try to talk about good practices in the code everyone seems so interested but there is always no time.
Sooo I will stay here for at least two years, I hope I can make a change for good in their code smells.3 -
There should be a developer licence so we could stop these stupid wannabes from getting into and ruining the industry with their shit work. We're so fed up maintaining these stupid codes the company previously outsourced somewhere on earth.12
-
Man accidentally 'deletes his entire company' with one line of bad code rm -rf in his bash script 😂😂1
-
I think I'm a good developer. I have pretty decent debugging skills, including pulling apart disassembled x86 and other architecture code.
I'm fascinated by how things work.
But almost everything is catered for by a library. Or has already been done.
I find it enjoyable to create a library or program myself, but get disheartened when I find some library or program that is written seemingly very well, compared to my own code. And then I start to think I'm not a good developer after all.
Sort of relates to my previous rant about repeatedly rewriting code.
Applies to me doing programming as a hobby but probably affects my code at work as well... I just can't help but think my code is probably awful compared to what someone else might write.
...then I see incredibly ugly, messy, badly written code by other people and I feel better...
I suppose it is like an artist who sees amazing works but cannot paint to that standard, but is well beyond drawing stick figures with crayons.
Sounds like a trivial problem but it probably impedes my progress with a lot of things.3 -
When the WYSIWYG editor needs to go back to school for coding.
<span style="font-weight: bold;"><br></span>
How is that even useful!?1 -
As a rookie programming, I wrote really bad code and didn't understand why. Now, I've improved to where I know bad code, but I continue writing studios horrible solutions. And in the end up refactoring much until I don't have energy to look at my code anymore. This although knowing what I should/shouldn't do. Shame!
6 -
$a = 1;
$b = 2;
echo ($a < $b) ? ($a > $b) ? 'This is totally fine' : ($a < $b) ? 'This is not ok!' : 'Perfect' : 'No problem here';
Why do people do this?!
(And I mean nested ternary ifs, not coding in PHP :P)17 -
This started off as a rant but it soon grew way too large to fit in 5000 characters, so I had to take to my Medium blog instead.
Here, y'all, have a lesson in web design from hell.
https://medium.com/@linuswillner/...3 -
I can’t understand why every time I work for a multimillionaire company that sells their product to thousands of companies, when I start to debug this fucking product it crashes because of the absence of simple input checks... wtf
“Can’t divide by zero”
“Null everywhere”4 -
Stop commenting out code blocks!
Either fix your shit or delete it.
I am open to argue what fixing may mean, as it is perfectly fine to make your broken code not reachable, e.g. via feature flags or skipping certain tests. Yet never ever should you comment those blocks!
So you say you want to keep it for historic reasons? You know, that is why we use version control! If you ever need certain functionality back, you can restore that state.
Each decent IDE also offers a local history where you can even restore code blocks that weren't even pushed or committed. So use that!
Commenting out test cases is a really bad habit, as you have no reminder that you shall restore it.
And no, a TODO and a FIXME won't count as a reminder as you have to actively look for them. And we all know how well that goes, don't we? (One time, I found a typo of a `TDO`. So even with a regular lookup for TODO, stuff will slip.)
Each test suite offers you ways to skip tests if there are valid reasons why they should not fail the build temporary and they offer colorful feedback. Yes, that means that your tests won't be green, but guess what: That's a feature! They shouldn't be.
That yellow is a fine reminder, aka warning!, that you should really fix your shit.
Commented code screams: "I DON'T KNOW WHAT I WAS DOING!" and it confuses the hell out of other developers ("Was this commented because of debugging purposes and should be active again or can I safely delete this!?") and adds verbose crap to the code base.
If you find yourself to be in a place that you comment code a lot, I also argue that your workflow is broken.
When you are using a decent debugger, there shouldn't that much of a need to comment in and out a lot of code in order to reason about your code-base.4 -
Agile coach Agiling: We shouldn't need code reviews as long as there is pair programming.
Me Internally: bad code + bad code doesn't make good code :( -
"Copying and pasting random code from the internet is only bad when you already have the same code elsewhere"
- Someone3 -
When the code is so bad that fixing one thing breaks 10 other things because the code was made to work with broken code.3
-
That feeling when you think your workflow is bad and happens to see"Professional" Degree level team of coders writing crap code with even crappier workflow
-
Some weeks back I mentioned (in a comment) my small program capable of editing the tags in audio files based on the filename.
Today, I had some spear time and implemented it in Go (the original version was Ruby).
For people that are interested, here is a link to the repo: https://github.com/SirWindfield/...
Any help/feedback is appreciated!
I promised someone to mention him if I get to publish it. But I forgot his user name :(9 -
I do not think that GoTo is bad. It can lead to hellish code but if you don't misuse it - it can be extremely useful.6
-
Last year I wrote a sudoku program which did solve easy sudokus but messed up on harder ones. I had got bored after a bit and forgot about it until today I thought I'd rewrite it using new stuff I've learned since and make it work properly.
So I opened it up and look and I'm like 'WHAT!?' because I don't understand what I wrote. After a bit I start to get the idea and see that it was kind of smart even if long and complicated.
If anything, it shows how much my documentation skills have improved.
Now I just have to work out how to redo it in a way I understand.7 -
No, the language is not stupid :) No, it is not a problem of the language, it's just the fact that you don't really understand how to use it properly :) i think this is something each of us hates to hear while frustated but needs to hear afterwards, bad design is a posibility tho, but 99.999% of the cases is our fault. face it, nd overcome it! and finally, to grow beyond it 😄
<<edited with my potato phone's standard image editor>>
-
So, I was fixing some code today, and stumbled upon this. Is it just me, or is this really an example of bad bad practice...? And, no, there was nothing to be executed after this function was called.
5 -
Started a new job this week, picking up the front end development of a property management system, since they're old developer just left.
Oh my god was his code bad, inconsistent use of js versions e.g only sometimes using lambda for anonymous functions, variable names that were a single letter, no comments, no documentation, and over 30000 lines split into almost 30 js files, following the logic of it is as fun as a hedge maze with no exit.2 -
So PHP 7.2 according to its creator, is actually faster if you write bad code.
Well im not amused.5 -
When you want to use Visual Studio Code so bad, but you're waiting for them adding minimap feature.
4 -
Automatically clean up code, removing redundant and duplicate bits, splitting large functions, and formatting it nicely. Especially useful when trying to understand some garbage code someone else wrote which you need to rewrite.2
-
I have this constant fear of showing my code to the world, but I’m confident to show my work to the world... How do I overcome this?7
-
Had to fix all bugs of my colleague this night because our client was not happy.
Before he joined us he worked as a database admin and now he wants to learn web dev and coding. But he did so bad mistakes like endless loops or requesting api 5 times.
In so tired now, happy when its christmas -
So, I'm looking into something and end up on Stack Overflow. Someone posted the question:
"Does minified javascript improve performance?"
This question was old as shit, all they way from 07/25/09, and about an Adobe Air application. (Remember that? Me neither...) It had a great, accepted, and still accurate answer, posted the same day the question was asked. Now, fast forward 8 years and on 12/08/17 (A mere 7 months ago...) the following answer was posted. I don't know what they were thinking, but here it is, complete and unabridged, with my comments in square brackets:
"I'd like to post this as a separate answer as it somewhat contrasts the accepted one: [Somewhat contrasts? More like completely contradicts...]
Yes, it does make a performance difference as it reduces parsing time - and that's often the critical thing. For me, it was even just simply linear in the size and I could get it from 12s to 4s parse time by minifying from 3MB to 1MB. [First off, your parse time should NEVER be THE critical thing, but secondly, and more importantly, WHO THE FUCK HAS 1MB OF MINIFIED JS ON A PAGE!!!]
It's not a big app either, it just has a couple of reasonable dependencies. [THERE IS ABSOFUCKINGLUTELY NOTHING REASONABLE ABOUT ANYTHING HE JUST SAID! What dependancies is he using?! You could use minified and not even gzipped jQuery, AngularJS, Vue, Ember, React, AND Dojo libraries on the SAME PAGE, AND have 118k of application code, AND STILL NOT HAVE HIT 1MB QUITE YET!!!]
So the moral of the story here is: Yes, minifying is important for performance - and not because of bandwidth, but because of parsing. [Javascript should NEVER take longer to parse then to download, even on a low powered device...]"
So, yeah, I'm at a loss for what this guy was thinking, but the thought the people like this exist, and that my browser might one day be subjected to their horrific nightmare of code terrifies me...2 -
How do you cope with coworkers who are okay with lousy code and don't want to make it better because "how does it matter"?6
-
What if the reviewer gives you bad reviews that lead to bad code, and you can't defend because he couldn't understand the shit you're talking about?3
-
Rant and opinions wanted. Its a long one.
I have been working on a project for a month and a half. For the first week I was requesting designs that I got about 2 of out of 15. For the next week and a half the designer was on holiday so I couldn't do anything but delivered a few more designs once he got back.
This takes us 2 weeks in already. I have other things to do as well so at the same time I work on support tickets and some bespoke development coming in.
I get given 2 or 3 more designs and can't get anything else out of the designer after waiting a week so I have to design everything myself as I go and build it. Something I have never done before.
We are now 3 and a half weeks in. My boss randomly tells my pm it needs to be demo ready the next day. I work furiously to hack something together. It works but key functionality is missing.
I move house and work from home for a week and a half. I do my best but the project is full of bugs and the CSS is horrible because I didn't know what I was making at any stage. It is therefore CSS rules repeated in IDs everywhere.
My colleagues join me on the project because my boss has decided to try and sell it tomorrow.
They run through it and find all the bugs left from me working furiously to get things done quickly. Things like no search pagination and missing validation.
My boss is now pisses at me because the project is not finished, my colleagues are now all working on it. Throughout it all he knew the designer was not delivering me anything and that I was struggling.
Am I in the wrong for writing shit code that came about because I was coding with no idea of what the finished project should look like? Is he in the wrong for dumping this on me and just letting me get on with it even though he knew there were no designs?
Btw I am just finishing a 1 year internship and before this have never done web dev before.
Discuss.7 -
It finally happened. They just kept pushing, and pushing, and pushing. Asking for more and more features in an app that was a hard-coded demo from the beginning. Well it's all coming down now.
That database that was added in, missing half the API.
New features, broken.
Old features, broken.
Buttons, missing.
Drivers, need updating.
Yee, haw.
I tried to tell them, I really did. That maybe we should stop asking the client what they want, and instead sell them what we have. Well, now we have nothing.3 -
You join a new team. You find that the code is horrendous. Do you
A. Run away while in probation?
B. Start complaining about it and have the others hate you?
C. Cry silently and hope things will get better?9 -
Ok let's see. Who tha he'll created this code... Well well let's rewrite it. 8 hours later. OK now it is done. Let's see who to blaim... :@
O no!! it's me :( -
just heard about an LG fridge with built-in Windows 10Tab:
"The fridge has an Intel processor and 2GB RAM. It will not replace your Desktop-PC!"
//you don't say2 -
Why the fuck are there so many utterly useless programming blogs? I have to implement DES in C++ for our college project. After coding most of it step by step, I decided to swallow my pride and check for an implementation online to save time because I was confused in the XOR part. Now most programming blogs had the same code copy pasted. To top that, NAME YOUR FUCKING VARIABLES PROPERLY YOU MORONS! I decided I'm better off resolving my confusions the hard way.3
-
I don't think there is anything more painful than seeing some programmers writing badly formatted code.
I mean how can anyone use a single space or completely inconsistent spaces and tabs.
What is more painful is that you cannot scream at them because you don't wanna be an A-Hole trying to force your methods to others. -
I learned very quickly that magic globals are baaaaad.
I mean, it's easier than using a queue for passing data between threads, right? -
Code review moment that I hate
Me: This is a bad practice. You shouldn't do this
Developer: But it works
*Showed articles and examples why it's bad*
Developer: I see. But it works. Why should I change it?2 -
When you spend 3h trying to fix a procedure on MySQL and the problem was a f***** variable name. I felt so bad and sad :'(1
-
Lets make a rant before going to bed
Who had the marvelous idea that a developer's proeficiency could be measured by years?
So at my new job Ive been waiting for credentialls, server access software installation, etc ( i know i know but thats for another rant ) and all that idle time has given me opportunity to crawl in the company's sharepoint page which has the career path for a software developer, since Im a student Im listed as trainee, but after that I have to wait 3 years + certifications to be considered as senior and then be able to hop to next hierarchy level Software Designer and then another three years to be able to become a software architect. So my point, as I was seeing this I thought "I dont wanna wait 6 years to become a software architect, Im going to be better faster in order to become needed and make them promote me faster"
The thing is Ive always wanted to become a softwsre architect and learning that I have to wait 7 years to be considered a proeficient architect just makes me mad.
Pd: One of the requirements for a senior developer is knowing Lines of code time stimation1 -
My first job as a '"dev"' (I really need some kind of super quotation mark for this).
I was young and too stupid too know how stupid I really was, I jobbed at a small recruiting firm and one day my boss complained about her database system and that she needed to hire a student to remake it. Suffering from the problem to be too incompetent to even recognise I'm incompetent I obviously offered my services as a python wizard I mean I could write a program that saves fibonacci numbers to a csv file, how much more could there possibly be? Fast forward two months and I proudly presented a GUI written in VB (it had an wysiwyg GUI editor) that was loosely frankensteined onto a bunch of together copy pasted python scripts running on a Windows Server. No web interface just accessible via vnc. It was slow, sluggish and soo ugly but it worked and did exactly what she wanted it to do. Sure the database was a bunch of csv files but non the less, to say it in pm, it resolved the user story. I quit shortly after because of her tendency to not pay the last bill after something was done (and tbh i deserved it) but she never removed my account from the server. So I copied my "magnus opus" from there... Let's just say whenever I look back at it I feel ashamed and yet it serves as a reminder to never be content with how good you are. -
Yanno, when I pay $60 for a theme, I get what I get. That's fine. Invariably I end up having to mess with the css. That's fine too.
However, theme makers? Please don't mix hyphens and underscores in your selectors. Decide on a case style. Avoid div-itus.
And for the love of all a selector such as #Top_bar .logo #logo a.logo makes code a pain in the ass to test5 -
I bonded a lot with a co-worker over the last several months as I had to mentor him in iOS and how to maintain our apps. We mostly bonded over how much we hate Objective-C and the management of the project. Now we are buying Christmas presents for eachother. Bad code brings people together
-
1. Commented code instead of actually cleaning it up.
2. Returning default return variables instead of rewriting obsolete code. (Generally if/else conditions with return). So instead of removing the if/else statements i return default value(null or empty objects). This is when the case of if/else will never arise. -
I've been infcted with writing awful, sinful, obscure code, so others can't read or change it.
Recently i got my first full time job as a programmer (yay). It's with a company with 15+ year old system and they are currently upgrading it. But it's driving me crazy with the massive mess of old and new code. However it only gets worse! Instead of making it simple and nice to read, they want it over complex, just to get something from the database i have create at least 5 fucking classes and endless SQL code, the old system didn't requier any SQL or the creation og new classes, WTF. I've become a sinner, of corse i use the old system, but i do it secretly, and i obscurify my code so others can't understand. It's shameful, but i'm afraid to confront the older programmers, they've spend too much time in the system and they've been in the business for a lot longer than me.3 -
Screw Joomla. And screw the agency that put together these sites. I'm almost impressed, I can only assume from the state of things that whoever worked on them has successfully created multiple websites by smashing their face into the keyboard and hoping for the best.1
-
I always enjoying snacking on some popcorn while people argue so, what are your thoughts:
Comments in your code - good or bad?4 -
Don't leave "broken windows" (bad designs, wrong decisions, or poor code) unrepaired. Fix each one as soon as it is discovered. If there is insufficient time to fix it properly, then board it up. Perhaps you can comment out the offending code, or display a "Not Implemented" message, or substitute dummy data instead. Take some action to prevent further damage and to show that you're on top of the situation.
We've seen clean, functional systems deteriorate pretty quickly once windows start breaking. There are other factors that can contribute to software rot, and we'll touch on some of them elsewhere, but neglect accelerates the rot faster than any other factor.
"The Pragmatic Programmer"
3 -
I went back and looked at some code I wrote a couple years ago. It made me so sad... I well and truely did not understand a lot of core concept yet at the time, and I was stubborn and thought what I was writing was good and refused to start over or delete code.
This try block had 4 FileInputStream objects and I even have a defined branching statement which I never use.
Whoever marked this assignment probably needed a lot of alcohol.
1 -
Some weeks ago I was invite to speak at the Campus Party and this past Thursday was the presentation day.
I was giving a mini-workshop about parallel processing to something around 50 people.
No matter how many times have you tested your code, in the middle of the presentation, it will fail and the next day after the presentation, it will work fine, without any changes.
I’m a bit sad about it and next week I’ll be at TDC to speak to more than 100 people and this if f*cking my mind.
Conclusion: live code is a shit and I’ll think 10 times before put it again in my presentation.1 -
Just went over some of my old horrible code from before i started studying. I litterally went from 104 lines of if/else statements to about 15 lines with loops. Then down to 2 lines with lambdas...
I saved 102 lines of actual code. And the runtime! I had a loop count to 10000 with no body! It helps to study apparently :/ -
Whoever wrote this line of code... please take on a different profession.
`else if len(LEFT({ODWR_CLAIMSNAPSHOT.POLICY_TYPE}, 3)) > 0 then`8 -
Adding a new feature to a mobile app that has a bunch of classes for getting URLs! Want some examples?
FallbackUrlProvider
CompositeUrlProvider
CompositeRouteUrlProvider
CompositeBaseUrlProvider
RootUrlProvider
I was half expecting to find FallbackRootBaseCompositeUrlProvider!
Not only that, but there were a load of interfaces that sometimes didn't match the name of the class!!!
For example,
class RootUrlProvider : ICompositeUrlProvider
Ugh! But I managed to get the new feature in... Somehow... After trying something... Throwing it away... Trying something else... Throwing it away...
😭😭😭3 -
Coworker 1 starts project
Coworker 2 inherits same project
*repeat 3 more times*
Coworker n has no idea what this spaghetti code is and what it does since everyone has done quick fixes as per management requirements.
This is how the company where i work functions. And with all these projects going from one dev to the other i can tell you its a real shitshow and a lot if frustration 😤2 -
I just got cancer. "full stack" wrote this:
var steams = [] ;
for (var key in images) {
streams[streams.length] = fs.createWriteStream(images.imageName);
streams[streams.length - 1].on('close', function (filename) {.....
why, Why Why and how did you come up with something this bad?
Dude creates an empty array to populate it with write streams just so he can pop each one two lines below and attach a listener.
It's the first thing I checked in this application and I'm afraid what else I'm gonna find.2 -
Another guy and I are each making a CMS to see who can be done first and who's looks/acts the best. He's basically done and I still have a lot to do, but I've been looking over his code and, it. is. bad. The classes are badly made and named with all lowercase. And i found this thing, he has 10 other functions just like this one.
His: https://ide.explosivenight.us/works... (I made sure sql injection isn't possible for normal users)
Mine: https://al1l.com/blog
4 -
I guess it's my third or the fourth company that am currently changing.
I have the will to improve and write better code quality level up. But sometimes i guess i have the lack to find the how to do these stuff and how to practice and who is going to tell me that i have to change these lines of code so you can improve am just in a big mess and i feel so bad about it.
Now i had just received a new warning at my current company that i either improve or i get fired. So i have been searching over google and internet how to improve as well i had just created a new project for the will to practice and become better.
Can someone tell me what i should do?
How to fix everything and let my colleagues gain my trust in my code commits ?
Because literally i feel so bad about everything and you can't imagine how miserable i feel.3 -
So I was wondering in which of the Myriad of js files was this function that changed the display attribute on a div.
Dear previous dev,
What the fuck was coming into your mind when you thought it was a good idea to write it in datetime.js???
Lazy fuck.2 -
Arg trying to code in a project that is like a book with chapters. Each sentence is written in a different language, the words of each sentence are in the wrong order, the paragraphs are in the wrong chapters and the book is an elephant. 🐘
-
It's kind of depressing looking at how bad the source code has transformed from a previous project that I had planned, designed, and did the initial implementation.
But I guess this is the problem of having developers who don't really care about the quality of their work, especially when it comes to PHP. -
I propagate to others that the use of singletons is bad, but still use them on rare occasions in code, which only I touch. 😈🐒4
-
Theacher said "write 100 times :"I'll not write bad code and also I'll use TDD "... but she specify how "
8 -
my oh my, its my bad, .. dont worry its my bad. you dont have to look at me like that. im sorry cos im asking you about wtf was wrong with code and asking you to fix it.. #case sensitive.
-
Fixing a faulty plugin modification from a former developer, and no documentation, plugin provider wants payment for support...
Me crying on the side near to pull the trigger -
Since when was having 3 spinner styles and 2 pop ups styles a good idea in a SaaS? This baby needs a proper spruce up. I must admit it's not really a rant, I enjoy it, decrapifying the code and general refactoring. This is from a hackathon a good couple of years ago. Finally giving it some TLC. Feels amazing.
-
When they say 'Write comments!' and you are like:
// Do necessary operations
I have been refractoring a project with a SHITTONE of comments like this and a FUCKLOAD of nested if statements. And then this commes along:
$user2 = User.find($user->id);
WHO WRITES THIS STUFF? I am never working on a cheap project from India again.3 -
Wanna see MadMan Code?
class DestroyMemory
{
public:
explicit DestroyMemory()
{
auto *destroy = new DestroyMemory();
for(auto i = 0u; i < sizeof(*destroy); ++i)
{ std::cout << "hihi\n"; }
}
};
If this will not work, tell me the reason why... :)
i am explicitly curious if anyone finds a reason that this should not do what it is supposed to do. :)8 -
When doing a project from scratch, what would you prefer?
Code Quality + Time = Product
Bad Code Quality + Les Time = Product7 -
Co-developer loves going through my code and tries to make me look bad to the team, not quite sure what I ever did to her lol
FMDL3 -
Why oh why do devRant have this crappy webApp. Ranting about bad Software and code on a such a bad app is like complaining about speed on a rail trolley.6
-
Am I that bad at JS or long files of Javascript code (200+ lines) are much worse than their PHP equivalent? :))2
-
I guess i have to be thankful for not knowing whomever wrote this fucking piece of shit of a PHP app that i have to fix stupid bugs in a daily basis.
Cause if i did know the bastard.. i'm pretty sure i would fucking bash his useless head in with anything i had in my hands at the moment... FUCK!.
The level of ignorance and stupidity.. i can't even begin to comprehend.
The worst is that we can't even rewrite this fucking piece of buggy shit cause the bosses are so fucking proud of their deformed creation and wont pay us decently to even to that in the first place.2 -
Who writes something like this!?!?
if (result == "True")
{
return "True";
}
else
{
return result;
}1 -
!rant
Let's say that you have (or had) a colleague that you utterly despise for whatever reason. Have you ever wrote convoluted or straight up spaghetti code on purpose just to make his/her life harder?
(I am aware that authoring bad code can bite you in the ass down the line, just curious to see if anyone ever went that far) -
Greatest distraction when coding -> Annoying project managers really. I quit a company after working 4 days because the PM on the project just wouldn't respect boundaries. Always asking for updates every 10mins.
-
So I'm going to work on a project with a webapp and mobile applications. I look at this monstrosity that sends username and pass as plain json and there is almost no sparation of concerns, along with very little documentation. Please save me1
-
We have this C# class which is like the core of our entire business logic. If you are in another class and it doesn't contain an argument in the constructor and/or property of that core class you're gonna have a bad time.
That core class has lots of useful business logic bools, "IsSomething", "HasSomething" etc. However that core class has a parameterless constructor which is sprinkled dangerously throughout our app, meaning the object is often not initialised properly and it's a 2 day mindfuck to make sure your "IsSomething" bool is actually false and not just false because the other business logic that bool relies on wasn't initialised and the bool has never had a chance to be true.
It's difficult to trust even a simple "if' statement. And if you're somewhere were you've had a list of that core class passed in, you need to trace how the list was initialised to make sure all your bools have been set 😴5 -
Just found a few methods in the same file which does the same task written by different devs just because they did not know a method already existed in the first place. How tough is it for them to do a grep on the file?1
-
Shitty code. Nothing makes me avoid coding more than seeing bad written obfuscated hard to debug code...
Look a fly. -
some things I found in AOSP code good to see that I am the only one who writes bad patches to make things run .
-
when programming fails.
when I updated the firmware on this piece, something went wrong and the device broke.
Google'd and learned that the only way to unbrick is to break the other side open and remove a non-removable battery, to reset. else it will stay bricked forever
-
Going through old code
And it's beautiful
Probably my best code ever
And it feels good
I am not that bad actually -
IMHO: VS Code = Gnome (I love it but it's a constant fight)
Sublime = Unity (Not bad and reliable)5 -
Just found a service method that saves an entity that isn't related to that service, that returns a ModelAndView object. I think my brain just broke. 1) Single Responsibility Principal. Do not save ObjectB in ObjectAService. 2) Services should not be aware of your view context. That's what controllers are for. Do not return a ModelAndView from a service method.
-
Anyone looking for shitty code practices take a look at the Emotiv API. The way they have written sample code should be mode illegal.
I fucking hate reading through such a shitty peace of sample code.
Top Tags
Weekly Rant
View