"who is 'Drew Paul? And why do you hate him so much?"
"It's D-R-U-P-A-L, mom. And don't worry about it, you don't need that aggravation in your life."

Me: develops my first android app with firebase by google.
Me: finishes app, tests it and it works.

Firebase after 3 months: we were first going to scale our servers on our own based on how many people are simultaneously using your app. But now fuck you, we will have a cap of 100000 simultaneous users.

Me: fuck this kills my app if it scales. Have to Shard everything on the db side and overhaul the entire app to work will multiple db instances. Takes a month.

Android after 6 months: dude your app is working fine without any hiccups. Let me fuck it up. We will stop all your services when your app is not running or backgrounded. Also we will make it illegal to start services in this case and we will throw exceptions.

Me: what the actual fuck. They now want me to focus on a JobScheduler, fine... But now even intent services won't work properly. So use a job scheduler to start a JobIntentService which is essentially another job scheduler for queuing. wtf android.

Ps solved it and works again.

PS: WAITING FOR ANDROID TO FML WITH ANOTHER NEW VERSION. Maybe they'll say you can't run your app at all now

When you use “goto”

Tv hacker: I'll write code to hack their security cameras

2 seconds later

Tv hacker: I'm in

Me: go fuck yourself you fucking fuck

Never thought I'd have so much in common with a layout

Aww.....

!rant

I often find myself reading a physical copy of a book or something written on paper and my brain just wants me to Ctrl+f

saying "WWW" takes longer to say than just saying "World Wide Web"

🎶 He's making a list
He's testing it twice
SELECT * FROM users WHERE behavior="nice"
SQL-clause is coming
To town. 🎶

"I'm done with all this BS. Visual appearance doesn't matter, will uninstall all themes first thing in the morning"

* stays up until 4 AM googling "geometric theme for zsh"*

I did not create this and could not find a link to true creator. Still pretty funny though

When you have something in your clipboard but then press Ctrl+C instead of Ctrl+V and end up with a blank line.

Don't like where Java is going

At a hackathon I went to they asked all 1200 participants what code editor they used... 4 people used MS Word.

FUCK DJANGO CSRF FRAMEWORK.
THE PERSON THAT BROKE csrf_exempt DECORATOR SHOULD BE PUNISHED BY YEARS OF HARD WORK IN BITCOIN MINE. I DONT KNOW WHO YOU ARE BUT FUCK YOU AND ALL YOUR CODE, I WISH YOU SLOW AND PAINFUL DEBUGGING OF LEGACY, UNDOCUMENTED, PRE-JQUERY IE-FUCKING-6 CODE YOU FUCKITY FUCK!!!

git pshu
git phsu
git puhs

**when you hear me typing fast**

Reading Job openings as a JavaScript developer

Your standards are getting low, Google.

When you clicked the correction several times before realizing...

And the most useless function of the year award goes to...

Am I the only one here to love Macbook but hate OS X and use Linux on Macbook?

I'm a Dev that doesn't like coffee, fuck me right?

LOL
http://robbomb.com/wp-content/...

Day 57: Visual Studio is still uninstalling...

I like PHP and I develop on Windows 10.

And I have a light theme on my text editor.

The good thing about devRant is that everyone here respects each other just because everyone here knows or likes the dev world, we're all a family here. Not like those Stack Overflow bastards.

Saw this gem today. God damn it Siri

Saavn(music streaming app), somebody is high.

Still true

Oracle. Enough said.