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My mom died when I was 7, after which my dad bought me a Commodore 64 so I had something to lose myself in during the mourning process.
I learned everything about that system, from my first GOTO statement to sprite buffers, to soldering my own EPROM cartridges. My dad didn't deal with the loss so well, and became a missing person 5 years later when I was 12.
I got into foster care with a bunch of strict religious cultists who wouldn't allow electronics in the house.
So I ran away at 14, sub-rented a closet in a student apartment using my orphan benefits and bought a secondhand IBM computer. I spent about 16 hours a day learning about BSD and Linux, C, C++, Fortran, ADA, Haskell, Livescript and even more awful things like Visual Basic, ASP, Windows NT, and Active Directory.
I faked my ID (back then it was just a laminated sheet of paper), and got a job at 15-pretending-to-be-17 at one of the first ISPs in my country. I wrote the firmware and admin panel for their router, full of shitty CGI-bin ASP code and vulnerabilities.
That somehow got me into a job at Microsoft, building the MS Office language pack for my country, and as an official "conflict resolver" for their shitty version control system. Yes, they had fulltime people employed just to resolve VCS conflicts.
After that I worked at Arianespace (X-ray NDT, visualizing/tagging dicom scans, image recognition of faulty propellant tank welds), and after that I switched to biotech, first phytogenetics, then immunology, then pharmacokynetics.
In between I have grown & synthesized and sold large quantities of recreational drugs, taken care of some big felines, got a pilot license, taught IT at an elementary school, renovated a house, and procreated.
A lot of it was to prove myself to the world -- prove that a nearly-broke-orphan-high-school-dropout could succeed at life.
But hey, now I work for a "startup", so I guess I failed after all.23 -
How to become Android Developer with zero Programming knowledge?
1. Goto "About" option in your Android mobile.
2. Click "Build Number" continuously 5 times.
*tap* *tap* *tap* *tap* *tap*
Congratulations
"You are a Developer"
now :p5 -
Sit down at desk
Open VSCode
Stare are my code for a good 5 minutes
Get up
Goto kitchen
Make extra strong cofee
Drink. It. All.
Sit down
Re attempt to decipher last weeks code.....
Mondays.8 -
A guide to estimations.
1) don’t give an immediate answer. The first “timeframe” you give will be held against you and will result in overtime and working weekends.
2) think of a relevant piece of work and the time that took.
2.1) if it’s something you haven’t done before, add some adequate research time.
3) allow half a day of testing for every day of development.
4) add a day as buffer - this is good for on the fly bug fixes
5) calculate time
6) now give an educated estimate.
7) this should take you 5 seconds to get through mentally.
8) if scope creep occurs: goto:15 -
90s devs: "Did you know about GOTO/CONTINUE for control flow? it's so convenient and powerful!"
00s devs: "GOTO is an antipattern. But did you know about try/catch? You can use it for control flow, just write a lot of exception classes, it's so powerful!"
10s devs: "Using exception blocks for generic control flow is an antipattern. But have you heard about event listeners and observer patterns? It's so powerful!"
Developers are so good at repackaging and reselling square wheels by giving them fresh, impressive sounding names.
😡18 -
Food.... It works every single day and also motivates me to goto the office.
My office is next to a mall.
7 -
This was my day at work today
-Be me at work
-Use git terminal on WORK PROVIDED MacBook
-Decide to clone into a repo into another repo as it was one project inside another project
-Makes changes to code
-Attempts to add .
- warning: adding embedded git repo ...
-Apparently needs submodules
-Shit doesn't get added
-During this get asked to create 2 new branches and modify some code
-Do that specifying files to add as add . breaks everything
-Has 3 branches now detached from master
-Super confused where anything is and what's going on
-Go back to branch for other repo to get added to
-Spends 30 minutes trying to understand submodules
-Gives up and deletes folder moving it elsewhere
-Commits begin failing everywhere. Super confused.
-Get everything figured out and commiting
-Goto merge all branches to master
-Merge conflict with .DS_Store
-FML
I think I'm done guys12 -
Client: My email not working
Me: What error message you getting
Client: Nothing, it's just stuck on Outbook
Me: Is your Internet working?
Client: Yes, of cause am not that stupid
Me: No! No! just asking as checkup
Client: Okay
Me: Open your Internet Browser and goto Google or Facebook
Client: Okay hold on..I am getting message "There is no Internet Connection"
Me: Yea, your Internet is not working that's why email can't be send. Talk to your IT Guy or Internet Provider about it.
Client: Okay, thanks!3 -
10 years of repeating cycles of the following:
#interview
them: yeah, this is a gamedev position, c#, unity, prototyping, maybe some hololens r&d
me: cool! exactly what i was looking for, as i said a few times, i can't do php anymore, it literally causes me literal deppression.
them: don't worry, we have people for thaz, but we have nobody for c# and unity, with some art skills feel as well as you do.
me: great, glad we're on the same page. i'm taking the job! <3
them: great! oh btw, there's this enterprise intranet app in php that needs some additions, can you please do them?
me: ... what did we talk about during my interview?
them: yeah, but it's just gonna be a short thing, don't worry.
me: ...well...ok, i think i can do that.
*3 to 6 months still on the same, or the next, php enterprise bullshit app. i'm totally exhausted in all ways possible, stressed literally permanently, dreading every day, every new ticket, every meeting every contact with everyone, not able to give a shit about what i do anymore, thinking about suicide*
them: you lazy incompetent fuckup, you're fired!
* i stop communicating and coming out of my room for anything else than toilet, and shopping. stop communicating with my friends, with anyone, anxiety and exhaustion caused by even the thought of talking to anyone about anything, or doing anything, is usually unbearable. i spend 3 to 8 months like this, just sleeping, drinking, watching youtube, sometimes playing games but even that "activity", or rather even the thought of that "activity" is often exhausting. after that time, i kind of recuperate emotionally and mentally, start looking for another unity+c# gamedev job, find it, apply,
goto #interview8 -
Whenever a language has a goto statement I can't resist :
On error goto hell
// code
Hell:
// error handling3 -
When I started programming Batch Files I decided to go big and and make an Batch Program with a fully functional UI system. Just when I had finished the first menu I kept getting a "goto was unexpected at this time" or something like that. I did everything I could to see about debugging until I finally cleared my calender and spent the next week debugging. A week of debugging goes by and I see someone coding in color rather then black and white at my school. I walk up to him and ask. "What language is that?" To which he replies "Batch". I asked him how he got Notepad to be in color and he simply pointed to the top left of the screen and it said Notepad++.
I get home later that day and look up "Notepad++" and download the first thing I see. I install the .msi file and I see a language bar at the top of the screen. Set it to batch, and drag my .bat file into the program to see six of my dividers are red bars. I look this up and see there's another spacing option "echo.", I replace my current spacers with this and the whole thing starts working. Fml, that's a week I'm never gonna get back3 -
1. Put headphones
2. Put videogame OST (Chrono Trigger is the best)
3. Start Atom
4. Sacrifice a male virgin to my Code Muse to replenish her mana stock
5. Jerk off seeing a fat granny midget porn
6. Clorophorm and put my coworker to sleep so he doesn't interrupt me to show the FailArm best fails of 2016
7. Atom is still loading, so I curse all the GitHub fuckers
8. Give up and start my emulator to play Chrono Trigger
9. Receive a pull request and realise I need to work and be a productive member of society
10. Goto 110 -
Simple but tasty dish.
It’s just scrambled eggs, Indian style.
Oh btw did I say? This is the first dish that I learnt and my favourite goto if I get stuck with golang And graphql.
Guys.
Please do try this combination.
Go + GraphQL + Neo4j
9 -
Recap: https://www.devrant.io/rants/878300
I was out Thursday at the Hospital. I'm what the doctors would call "Ill as fuck"
So, Friday I’m back in the office to the usual: "How was that appointment?"
I know people mean well when they ask this. So, I do the polite thing and tell them it went as well as it could.
Realistically it does't matter how well it went... They haven't cured Crohn's because I showed up to the appointment. They know I'm fucked already.
But, push it down, add it to the future aneurism.
I had to go through the usual resignation meetings with managers:
"We"re fucked now you're going"
"yep"
"we need to get a handle on how fucked"
"already done that for you, here"s a trello board, very fucked."
"we need to put a plan together to drop all the junior devs in the shit with the work you’ve been doing"
"You need about 4 devs, please refer to the previous trello board for your plan"
Meanwhile, me and Morpheus are in constant communication because all of this is like a Shakespearean comedy.
So, I overhear a conversation between a Junior Dev and the Solution Architect.
[SA] took over the project because he knows better than two tried and tested senior devs -_- (fuckwit).
JD: "It took me one and a half days to build it out"
SA: "Yeah, it must have taken me twice as long... It must be a problem with the project, you should just be able to check it out and run it."
JD: "I know, it has to be wrong"
All of this is about Morpheus' work of art, of an Ionic 3 hybrid app.
I fumed quietly at my desk because I've been ordered by the Stazi to be hands off.
Since Morpheus and me were pulled from the project [JD] and [JD2] were dropped into it to get it over the line.
It"s unfortunate and I was clear and honest with my advice to them: I personally would not take over the project because I"d be way out of my depth... Oh, and the App works, so uh, there's no work to do.
They have been constantly at our desks. Asking fuckdiculous questions about how to perform basic tasks. So they can get Morpheus" frigging masterpiece to the user.
It"s like watching that touch up of jesus that got borked by an amateur. Shit I have google, it's like watching this happen: http://ti.me/NnNSAb
[JD] came to me Friday evening.
"I can’t get this to build to iOS or install on [Test Analyst]'s phone."
Me: "No worries brother, where are you stuck right now?"
[JD] describes the first steps with clear indication he hasn't googled his problem.
Life lesson: http://lmgtfy.com/?q=lmgtfy
Que an hour of me showing [JD] how to build an Ion3 project for iOS. Fuck it, your man's in a bind and he"s asked politely for help. I can show him quicker than he can read 3 sets of docos.
I took him through 'ionic cordova build ios', the archive and release processes in XCode 9, then the apk bundling process for droid. Finally we have an MAM so the upload process for that too.
All the while cleaning up his AppIDs, Profiles, deployment attempts.
Damn they were a mess.
I did this with a smile on my face, not because I could say "I told you so"... But. because when any developer asks you how to do something. If you know how to do it, you should always be happy to learn them some new tricks!
Dude's alright, he's been dropped in the shit. Now I know how badly so I'll help him learn things that are useful to his role, but aren't project specific.
As a plausi-senior dev (I'll tell you about that later); it's my job to make sure my team have what they need to go home smiling!
I’m not a hateful fucker, the guy asked me an honest question so I am happy to give him the honest answer.
I took him through it a few times and explained a few best practices. Most were how to do his AppID and ProvProfile set up. Good lad, took it all on board.
However! In his frustration, he pointed the finger at Morpheus' "David" (ref: Michelangelo).
He miraculously morphed into a shiny colourful parrot and fed me SA's line:
"you should just be able to build from a clean clone"
My response was calm and clear:
"You can, it took me 20 minutes on Thursday evening. I was bored and curios, so I wanted to validate Morpheus' work. Here it is on my iOS device and my Android device. It would have taken me 5 if my laptop wasn’t so horrifically out of date."
I validated Morpheus' work so I have evidence, I trust that brilliant bastard.
I just need to be able to prove it's good.
[JD] took this on board.
Maybe listening to two tried and trusted senior devs is better than listening to a headstrong Solution Architect.
When JD left for the weekend I was working a late one (https://www.devrant.io/rants/874765).
His sign off was beautiful.
"I think I can happily admit defeat on this one, it can wait until Monday."
To which I replied: "no worries brother, if you need a hand give me a shout."
Rule 1: Don't be a cunt.
Rule 2: If someone needs help and you can give it: Give it!
Rule 3: Don't interrupt James' cigarette time.
Rule 4: goto Rule 3.4 -
Tl;dr
Longest Rant I've written so far.
How to manage a school (by out school director):
Did this student do something spezial to emphasize the school?
-No: Ignore him
-Yes: Did the student achieve this with the help of this schools staff?
-No: Take all the credit
-Yes: Hahaha, just a joke, nobody receives help from the school. Goto -No
Q: Should this class get the 5 day trip, they've been waiting for the whole year?
Director: No.
Q: But they don't even participate in other trips just to go there.
D: No
(Good thing she did not have the last word there)
Does the school director need this one week trip to india, just to talk once about stuff, you can talk about via email, to a sponsor?
D: "Of course I deserve it"
D: "We need faster internet in this school"
Network admins: "But it won't be of any use, if the network can't handle it. We'll need better pcs (and network conponents) on top of that"
D: "No, bot enough money available for that one." *browses email with IPad paid by school money*
Teacher: "I want to realize project xy with the students. We'll need around 1200€ (for 20 people)."
D: "Can place xy at our school to as advertise?"
T: "No, but it's be a valuable le-"
D: "600 at most."
(Again denied by people who aren't fcking assholes. We got 1500€, so 300€ per group)
D: So what makes you think you can teach informatics in this school"
Applicant: "Well, I'm friends with one of your teacher here. We went to university together, where I learn't nothing about informatics and I don't even understand the principles of this subject"
D: "Close enough. Hired, you can teach them all the theory stuffy. You don't have to prepare that yourself another teacher has done so. Just read it from his documents."
*In class with the mentioned teacher talking about Threads*
*Le wild code appears*
while (doStuff())
System.out.println ("Thread working...");
System.out.println ("Thread terminated");
T: "... and most importantly, when you have done all the work be sure to terminate the thread with 'System.out.println ("Thread terminated");'"
Should this teacher be allowed to participate in this seminar about burnouts?
D: "No, I can't afford paying the supplenze."
Staff: "We need to talk with the director about this."
S: "Not in her office. The cafeteria maybe"
*Not in the cafeteria either*
S: "Seems like she didn't come to achool today. Let's try tomorrow"
(^ Stuff that happens almost daily. Screw semicolons. I see her only once a month at most)
*Student send 5000 emails by accident* (Shit happens 😂😅😂😅)
D: "You gonna work here for a full afternoon"
*Student arrives for his punishment*
Staff: "Good that you're here. Do this real quick."
*10 min. Later*
Student: "Done"
Staff: "Well, we have no more work to give you, so you might as well leave"
DONE!!! Good job coming so far.
Our school is supposed to be the best, but internally it's one big meme.4 -
1. have an exciting app idea
2. create project folder
3. include WebPack
…
47. lose all passion for project and give up
GOTO 11 -
I typed "goto the place..." somewhere and later realized that "go" and "to" are two different words in real life.
-
I could bitch about XSLT again, as that was certainly painful, but that’s less about learning a skill and more about understanding someone else’s mental diarrhea, so let me pick something else.
My most painful learning experience was probably pointers, but not pointers in the usual sense of `char *ptr` in C and how they’re totally confusing at first. I mean, it was that too, but in addition it was how I had absolutely none of the background needed to understand them, not having any learning material (nor guidance), nor even a typical compiler to tell me what i was doing wrong — and on top of all of that, only being able to run code on a device that would crash/halt/freak out whenever i made a mistake. It was an absolute nightmare.
Here’s the story:
Someone gave me the game RACE for my TI-83 calculator, but it turned out to be an unlocked version, which means I could edit it and see the code. I discovered this later on by accident while trying to play it during class, and when I looked at it, all I saw was incomprehensible garbage. I closed it, and the game no longer worked. Looking back I must have changed something, but then I thought it was just magic. It took me a long time to get curious enough to look at it again.
But in the meantime, I ended up played with these “programs” a little, and made some really simple ones, and later some somewhat complex ones. So the next time I opened RACE again I kind of understood what it was doing.
Moving on, I spent a year learning TI-Basic, and eventually reached the limit of what it could do. Along the way, I learned that all of the really amazing games/utilities that were incredibly fast, had greyscale graphics, lowercase text, no runtime indicator, etc. were written in “Assembly,” so naturally I wanted to use that, too.
I had no idea what it was, but it was the obvious next step for me, so I started teaching myself. It was z80 Assembly, and there was practically no documents, resources, nothing helpful online.
I found the specs, and a few terrible docs and other sources, but with only one year of programming experience, I didn’t really understand what they were telling me. This was before stackoverflow, etc., too, so what little help I found was mostly from forum posts, IRC (mostly got ignored or made fun of), and reading other people’s source when I could find it. And usually that was less than clear.
And here’s where we dive into the specifics. Starting with so little experience, and in TI-Basic of all things, meant I had zero understanding of pointers, memory and addresses, the stack, heap, data structures, interrupts, clocks, etc. I had mastered everything TI-Basic offered, which astoundingly included arrays and matrices (six of each), but it hid everything else except basic logic and flow control. (No, there weren’t even functions; it has labels and goto.) It has 27 numeric variables (A-Z and theta, can store either float or complex numbers), 8 Lists (numeric arrays), 6 matricies (2d numeric arrays), 10 strings, and a few other things like “equations” and literal bitmap pictures.
Soo… I went from knowing only that to learning pointers. And pointer math. And data structures. And pointers to pointers, and the stack, and function calls, and all that goodness. And remember, I was learning and writing all of this in plain Assembly, in notepad (or on paper at school), not in C or C++ with a teacher, a textbook, SO, and an intelligent compiler with its incredibly helpful type checking and warnings. Just raw trial and error. I learned what I could from whatever cryptic sources I could find (and understand) online, and applied it.
But actually using what I learned? If a pointer was wrong, it resulted in unexpected behavior, memory corruption, freezes, etc. I didn’t have a debugger, an emulator, etc. I had notepad, the barebones compiler, and my calculator.
Also, iterating meant changing my code, recompiling, factory resetting my calculator (removing the battery for 30+ sec) because bugs usually froze it or corrupted something, then transferring the new program over, and finally running it. It was soo slowwwww. But I made steady progress.
Painful learning experience? Check.
Pointer hell? Absolutely.4 -
Behold, my 34 year old little baby (more like big daddy), the Acorn Electron. Still running fine but god is that BASIC awful.
7 -
Well, sh*t.
There is special hell for people using GOTO in C and even more special hell for people using it in *this* context.
9 -
001 REM Code review
010 PRINT "Nitpick nitpick nitpick nitpick nitpick"
011 GOSUB REFACTOR
020 PRINT "This function is too complicated, break it up"
021 GOSUB REFACTOR
030 PRINT "Why do you have three methods for this? Put all the logic in one method."
031 GOSUB REFACTOR
040 GOTO 020
041 REM ARGH
998 PRINT "Looks good."
999 STOP8 -
When you discover this new amazing programming language and play with it the whole weekend and then realize it’s Monday again and you need to go back to the office to work with some legacy GOTO spaghetti... 🍝🌧6
-
Boss: Any idea why ColleagueX's code might be blowing out the memory?
Me (internal): Cos he's a fucking retard who can't code for shit, doesn't listen when I tell him to do stuff properly because he's fucking lazy, has no idea what stack and heap are, uses goto everywhere, doesn't know how to debug, doesn't write any unit tests, and generally WASTES MY FUCKING TIME!
Me (external): Probably a memory leak. I'll take a look.2 -
1. Read about software engineering/design patterns, tools etc.
2. Adopt information to my requirements
3. Write code
4. Delete my shitty code from point 3.
5. Goto point 34 -
Allright, this one begs for a rant.
Me (Linux boi):
0 checkout code
1 update local config file
2 compile
3 deploy locally
4 run
5 use
Coleague (Windows boi):
0 checkout code
1 update local config file
2 compile
3 deploy locally
4 run
-1 "configuration xyz not found in config file"
→ goto #3
After 4 attempts:
ø windows.reboot()
3 deploy locally
4 run
-1 "configuration xyz not found in config file"
3 deploy locally
4 run
5 use
// out of curiosity...
3 deploy locally
4 run
-1 "configuration xyz not found in config file"
NO side actions taken (no configs updated, no code changes made, no nothing. Just simple double-clicking the redeploy script again and again)
Now... How do you objectively explain THAT?
http://weknowmemes.com/2013/01/... IRL :)8 -
Why is GOTO deprecated and not recommend!?
It was fun in school days programming, I used to write code randomly then use GOTO to sequence it.
Did anyone had fun with GOTO!?15 -
1. When you want Stickers, but things are actually going well and you have nothing to Rant about except
2. GOTO 12 -
In PHP (yes, it's a language I... don't hate) I've always hated exceptions. They're like GOTO, in an OOP world with interfaces and contracts, try/catch is really odd as it breaks a promise about returning with a typed value.
But you can now do this in PHP8, which comes pretty close to Maybe/Either monads (Option, Result whatever it's called in other languages):
function getUser(): User | UserNotFound
PHP8 unions don't come with the same strong guarantees as in other languages but *pets PHP gently on the head* you did well, my boy.
Now I would really love it if PHP9 could do:
function getUsers(): Collection<User>
Type Tree<T> = Null | Node<T>;
function 🎄(): Tree<Branch<Ornament|Light|null>>15 -
10 PRINT “Hallo”
20 GOTO 10
1983 : my very first program and also very first contact with a computer - a VC649 -
Assuming you make $100k and that's more than covers your cost of living.
Would you prefer being able to work from home whenever you need or make $30k more but have to goto the office pretty much every day?
The commute is 1hr.37 -
So I read this morning about some web teacher. Here is my story:
In high school I had a teacher who was "THE GOTO WEB GUY", at least that was what other theachers thought. Here is what reallity looked liked in a lesson of his:
He comes up with some ancient example he just found on some tutorials page and he just remembered bits of how to do it. So when he got stuck he fired up a google search. When a student had a question he fired up a google search. Because he didn't know shit. Of course you cannot know everything but he was so cocky about his skills that it really annoyed me. Best part? He sold web sites (joomla) where his greates achievment was to change the color of the template. Everything he teached in that semester had I already learned through selfteaching and tutorials in an evening. -
TIL the term "Kangaroo Code" was also a popular sort-of synonym for "Spaghetti Code".
It more referred to languages that heavily used "goto"s (because it would be "code with a lot of jumps")10 -
What a nice day to goto the office.
-some exercise after being stuck at home for a week
-no one on the trains even as they run smoothly
-nice "warm" weather and morning
-nice views
9 -
So my dear programming teacher really hates break statements... I mean really really really. He thinks it's better for readability if you don't break from any kinds of loops (not even ifs) well then we came across a switch statement in class. He says "breaks only exist because it's needed in switches" well how about returning from a fcking swith? or goto? then you need no break...
Is there anyone who could explain why I should NEVER use breaks and why it's bad in any piece of code? Why is it better to just use whiles because fors are apparently evil again? Srsly I just wanna ask him to show me some big code bases without breaks...8 -
10 PRINT "HELLO"
20 GOTO 10
RUN
It was the late 80's or early 90's, I was around 10 years old, and my jaw dropped when I typed this on the Atari 800XL my parents had just given to me.
Hooked ever since :)3 -
Fuck my life! For my studies at University it is required that I learn how to code... Over the past month I've been learning java, and yesterday a friend of mine has introduced me to Go. Now all I want to do is learn Go, meanwhile our Prof pushes us to learn switch-case and goto...17
-
It was at the beginning of my IT apprenticeship, I had no idea about coding in C and our teacher told us to write a "hello world" in C.
.. I wrote:
10 PRINT "HELLO WORLD"
20 GOTO 101 -
HOW TO PROGRAM(in four easy steps) :
1. Google the F*cking Problem.
2. Open a Stackoverflow link.
3. Copy and paste the code.
4. If it didn't work, goto step 2.
If it did work, goto step 1
(you didn't think you were done.. did you?)
FAQ
Q: What if there is no code?
A: Then it is impossible.3 -
Step 1. Learn to code .
Step 2. Exchange code for money.
Step 3. Exchange money for car, soap & a clean shirt.
Step 4. Profit.
[GOTO: Step #1]
Lol. OK on a serious note coding improved my love life, it drastically reduced the frequency of dates - but dramatically improved the quality and duration of my relationships.
I used to believe that anyone/thing had the potential to be great - and (like me) all they needed was a little time to seize an opportunity.
This essentially meant there were no deal breakers and I spent a lot of time giving people benefit of the doubt and investing a lot of time & effort supporting and trying to build on aspirations that would turn out to simply be fantasies I was indulging.
I still idealistically believe that everything/one has infinite potential - only now I know which problems are worth solving, which are purely for fun or a thought experiment and which should immediately be thrown out and refactored.
All the ambition in the world is void without drive.1 -
So, the other day, my teacher told me not to use goto in C#, with only the reason that "it is bad".
Okay teacher, I'm going to continue using it until you give me a valid reason. For example for making one loop instead of two. .-.24 -
I have just done my manicures yesterday evening. And, it's so nice to look at when you have your nails done from my point of view, especially when coding. So much view and can really boost self esteem, lets you smile, and motivated to work though I don't usually love Mondays because yeah, another manic Monday.
I just so love my manicures today, despite the allergies that I still have, the enhancement code that has not yet been deployed by our ever loving, supreme, Grandmaster turd, let's just name him, John Doe.
P.S. please not be easily removed manicures. For you are the only source of my happiness and my motivation to go to work (because bills is too mainstream and will always be the classy reason also)3 -
Earth keeps rotating
Seasons repeats
Life goes and come back
Machines in factories doing repetitive job
You sleep, you wakeup, you eat daily
... and y'all think loops are bad?2 -
Had an issue running through someone else's buggy code and my PM told me to "use a goto to fix it up, those always used to help me in school". Can a recruiter on here throw me a bone and get me out of this place?
-
Messenging with a friend about me working with VBA on a side project.
Me: VBA brings back bad behaviour
Him: Like?
Me: I_AM_KONSTANT and this is a _globalVariable.
Him: Hahaha^^
[...]
Me: Mister O. ...
Him: Mister M. ?
Me: Should i use goto?
Him: I think we need to break off contact.
Him: If you had said you killed someone. Ok.
Him: But GOTO?
[...]
Me: I did it. And then a cold shiver ran down my back.
Him: You deserve that!
____________________
( translate from German )4 -
I wish I could tell my dog not to get up from his comfortable position or sleep each time when I simply want to goto the bathroom or stretch.
Like bro no need I’ll be right back..7 -
Unreal Engine SDLC:
1. Start Epic
2. Wait
3. Start Unity
4. Wait
5. Open Project
6. Wait
7. Wait more
8. a bit longer...
9. (it usually crashes here, or freezes, in which case go to 1)
10. Game opened, make modifications in C++ codes
11. Wait VS to load
12. Wait VS to parse all the file in solution
13. Make changes
14. Compile
15. Run from Unreal
16. (sometimes, go to 9)
17. Goto 9
18. 9
19. Goto 9
20. Congrats on finishing the game, and losing your patience8 -
What do you guys do when you feel burnt out, and you don't feel like the weekend has actually let you unwind at all? Rinse and repeat week after week.
I might take a day and just goto the lake next weekend, as long as it's sunny.10 -
After long hours of intensive coding and no caffeine, goto bed because u realise it's 2AM. Wake up next day, look back at the came code, "what the hell was I tryin to do!"3
-
Encourage public schools promoting videos games as a sport.... Hm....
This can't be a good idea... I'm not paying taxes to let (other people's) kids play video games and goto esports competitions...
17 -
18pm: *starting to work on own project. Listening to classical music for better concentration*
22pm: *no progress*
22:10pm: *putting on some good old death core on max volume coz fuck it.*
22:30pm: *realizing I did more in the past 20mins than in the 4h before*
22:45pm: *super motivated*
2am: *same song again? Quick look on the clock...* "fuuuuuu" *apparently listened to my whole playlist. OK. Let's search for more stuff on my 2TB HDD I dedicated to death core etc*
4am: "lul" *go to sleep*
6am: *wake up, go to school"
*goto 18pm*2 -
>Sitting at desk pondering over what is wrong with code.
:Top
BRAIN : "maybe we will think better with /another/ cup of cofee?"
Repeat until
BRAIN : "damn now im too jittery to think about code. Maybe if I relax woth some music/meme hunting ill be able to focus"
Repeat until
BRAIN : "Damnit i spent 2 hours on 9gag and not coding. Gotta get back to this bug squashing but im now so tired. Maybe some cofee will help me think"
Goto Top3 -
Quick Tutorial: How to find a missing bug.
0) Wake up & have breakfast
1) Goto work
2) Do your job until the end of the working day
3) Make a backup
4) Shutdown your PC
5) Stand up
6) Go to the office door
7) Grab the door
8) Now the phone rings
9) Turn and go back
10) Take the phone
11) Now you get the bug report
This is a well approved method.
It always works!3 -
I have just lost all respect and desire to work for Google...
Google is accelerating partial reopening of offices and **putting limits on future of remote work**
Both hypocritical or draconian? Sounds like it's being run by an old man now...
Wonder if employees will revolt... Jump ship to the other FANG companies... Guess I'll win either way unless they all goto Facebook...
https://cnbc.com/2021/03/...12 -
Glad to support this awesome community! Thanks @dfox & @trogus for the quality shipment!
I'll look like a DevRant salesman with this Tee and the stickers on my Macbook :D Goto sleep, wake up covered in bitches with all this swag :D
5 -
So, I finally got a bicycle today. Time to start working on my health...
Am I the only one who's daily regime was:
1 - Go to work, sit around for 8 to 9 hours
2 - Come home, sit around for 8 to 9 hours
3 - Sleep for 8 hours
Goto 1?
I was surprised how the bikes these days are so incredibly light. I could lift it and keep it up no problem!10 -
Trigger warning:
Emotional !dev love life rant
I think this is not the right place to pour my heart out, but despite its more recent infights I still consider devRant to be a special community to me. And I guess if devRant is my goto place for support that's an issue. But maybe I just need to shout into a void because this is not about you solving this for me.
I have been in this relationship for ~6 years. My first great love. In the beginning, everything was perfect - a love story like from a cheesy movie. We've been through a lot to be together: Long distance, moving countries, a ton of bureaucracy (as she's from another country). So many memories.
It came as a surprise to me when she ended things. It really shouldn't have been. We've talked a lot about the reasons and I now see how much I've taken her for granted and neglected our relationship. I see now how I've been avoiding my problems and how I didn't work on my (mental and physical) health issues as good as I need to - not just for any relationship, but for myself. The regret/shame/guilt of not giving it 100% and of neglecting her weights heavily on me (besides the loss) and I am not sure what is worse.
Besides our relationship withering because of neglecting emotional needs, she also questioned our compability. We certainly have differences and different interests and we're both somewhat uncertain whether we really fit, if we ignore our history/emotions. It is actually a question that popped up in my head before sometimes, but I was too afraid to look into it for fear the answer is no. But here we are and ignoring that didn't help.
For now, we both need time to think about what we really want and whether this includes the other. We agreed that we need some distance to process the feelings. We still live in the same flat but for now she's staying with a friend most of the time and I'll also have a friend's place available soon. If in some time we both feel like we want to be together, we can date again - however she was also clear that she doesn't want to give any false hope and her current vision doesn't include me. If not, well have to hire a divorce lawyer. (Why you need a lawyer for that if both agree is beyond me.)
I am shattered. When it became clear to me that the relationship is over (and I ruined it), I got nauseous to the point that I threw up constantly for 6 hours. For the following 2 days I only cried and haven't eaten. Third day I started cleaning up the flat (long overdue!) - mostly for her tbh but I know it's good for myself, so better do the right thing with wrong motivation than sob all day -
talked to my psychiatrist and she brought some lunch which I could eat. Today (fourth day) she came over and we cooked lunch. I am still feeling terrible but the first days have been the worst I've ever felt and I've been trough quite a bit of (physical & chronic) pain - emotional pain hits different.
Let's see how this works out. In any case I now know very clear that I can't continue like before and need to work on my issues (for my own sake). I want be my best self, even if right now I don't have a lot of energy and am very depressed. I got an appointment with a therapist tomorrow - something I should have done years ago but I was overwhelmed with anxiety and analysis paralysis. I hope the future will be brighter and while I still wish to wake up from this nightmare and realize my faults without this breakup, I also know that I have to face reality.
PS: I do feel better now after writing this out. Thanks for listening, I guess.29 -
MS Access and VBA.
This combo is the worst dev tech I had to use it by now. Why? Because even if you try it, you can't make a single line of clean code. The syntax is horrible, it still use GOTO...
Maybe the reason why I hated working with it is linked to the context too: I was (and still) developing a system using NoSQL database and this system should be mostly fully configurable through metadata within JSON documents and it was. But we were still writing every JSON by hands so we decided we needed to develop a web based utility for us and clients who would need to configure the system but one of the head decision making people said that we don't need to use fancy technologies (because NoSQL is already "fancy") and that the configuration tool will be develop with Access because he used it a lot when he was younger and when he was coding during its free time. He said that using Access would be much easier and much time saving than our "fancy web based solution" and that he could help if we had questions...
Developing a MS Access software is already a pain in the ass but when you need to output JSON with it...1 -
I hate when some programmers say that goto should NEVER be used. It's clear that in common cases is not needed but there are situations where goto is the best solution10
-
[Me at night]
1 Me: should I sleep?
2 Brain: right after finishing this module
3 Me: <drinking coffee>
4 goto 16 -
I'm so fucking frustrated with my ex company CEO, this motherfucker made everyone move to Bangalore costing is employees a good chunk of their salary and this delusional ASSHOLE knew that only half of the expected funding was coming in January 2023 itself and they'd be out of funds by July/August, they let go few folks from the team, fired the entire marketing team and expected to make the product profitable. The only reason I had stayed at that time was because the product was interesting to build and the scale I was working with was crazy like 100k request per minute peaks and avg of 10k rpm. I left the company in August...
This MOTHERFUCKER hasn't paid out final settlement after leaving for most employees and he openly says to the folks who are still working there that paying us is not his priority.
I hope your Atlas cluster gets fucking deleted, accesses revoked and entire AWS setup goes down forever, bitch.
We can't goto courts because the company law tribunal needs atleast 1 crore (1.2 million usd) of unpaid dues to declare it insolvent in a years time..
This asshole deducted taxes from our salaried but didn't pay them to the income tax department for an entire fucking financial year.
What a cheating, delusional, sick bastard. And he's still not willing to sell off the company to pay off the debts and call it a day.
Aarrghhhh on top of losing 2-3k USD I might have to pay my taxes approx 5-6k USD to the govt to keep my records well maintained.
What a grade A delusional asshole 😡
If he won't clear the dues till December, I'm gonna launch a mass of social media posts and destroy his reputation so that he doesn't get one penny of VC funds in the future I'm gonna make sure of that...4 -
goto
Found it lying around. Googled it, and it seems people avoid it, so I started using it all over the place(s). goto b
a:
no other places to goto exit
b:
Yes, it does require some thought to avoid confusion, and some pull requests get declined, but... Helps me alot when I have goto a
:exit2 -
What?
I don't get it?
That doesn't make any scene....
goto line 5980
😎 coding like a boss....
goto line 8764
🤡 I have no idea what I'm doing.... -
When Idiots discovered "shutdown -i" and you're the poor guy without admin rights:
@echo off
:start
shutdown -a
goto start1 -
So,
Yesterday was Google CodeJam's Kickstart event ( or something like that ).
Participated in competitive programming for the first time. It was kinda fun I guess...
Nope I still hate competitive programming. I like being a laid back programmer who develops in his own pace.
I know it's not what industry wants but I can't jst go for competitive programming.
On the positive note, I started using goto in C++ because of it and created a better Graph library than I had before 🤗🤗
P.S. I did read on how to use goto and when to not use it. I guess my usage was fine... Or better yet, IT WORKED 😜😂
Well, I am done as far as competitive programming goes... 😭😭 -
How you know your a developer: you use 'goto' instead of 'go to'...
Apparently I've been spelling it wrong and my Android keyboard no longer corrects it...7 -
The best/worst code comments you have ever seen?
Mine:
//Upload didn't work, have to react:
system.println('no result');
//$Message gives out a message in the compiler log.
{$Message Hint 'Feed the cat'}
//Not really needed
//Closed source - Why even comments?
//Looks like bullshit, but it has to be done this way.
//This one's really fucked up.
//If it crashes, click again.
asm JMP START end; //because no goto XP
catch {
//shit happens
}
//OMG!!! And this works???
asm
...
mov [0], 0 //uh, maybe there is a better way of throw an exception
...
mov [0], 0 //still a strange way to notify of an error
// this makes it exiting -- in other words: unstable !!!!!
//Paranoic - can't happen, but I trust no one.
else {
//please no -.-
sleep(0);
}
//wuppdi
for (int i = random(500); i < 1000 + random(500 + random(250)); i++)
{
// Do crap, so its harder to decompile
}
//This job would be great if it wasn't for the f**king customers.
//TODO: place this peace of code somewhere else...
// Beware of bugs in the code above; I have only proved it correct, not tried it.
{$IFDEF VER93}
//Good luck
{$DEFINE VER9x}
{$ENDIF}
//THIS SHIT IS LEAKING! SOMEONE FIX IT! :)
/* no comment */5 -
I fix antique code for a living and regularly come across code like this, and this is actually the good stuff!
Worst usecase for a goto statement? What do you think?
int sDDIO::recvCount(int bitNumber){
if (bitNumber < 0 || bitNumber > 15) return 0; //ValidatebitNumber which has to be 0-15
//Send count request
if (!(send(String::Format(L"#{0:X2}{1}\r", id, bitNumber)) && flushTx())){
bad: //Return 0 if something went wrong
return 0;
}
String^ s = recv(L"\r"); //Receive request data
if (s->Length != 9) goto bad; //Validate lenght
s = s->Substring(3, 5); //Take only relevant bits
int value; //Try to parse value and send to bad if fails
bool result = Int32::TryParse(s, value);
if (!result) goto bad;
int count = value - _lastCount[bitNumber]; //Maximumpossible count on Moxa is 65535.
if (count < 0) count += 65536; //If the limit reached, the counter resets to 0
_lastCount[bitNumber] = value; //This avoids loosing count if the 1st request was
//made at 65530 and the 2nd request was made at 5
return count;
}4 -
Because I am very interested in cyber security and plan on doing my masters in it security I always try to stay up to date with the latest news and tools. However sometimes its a good idea to ask similar-minded people on how they approach these things, - and maybe I can learn a couple of things. So maybe people like @linuxxx have some advice :D Let's discuss :D
1) What's your goto OS? I currently use Antergos x64 and a Win10 Dualboot. Most likely you guys will recommend Linux, but if so what ditro, and why? I know that people like Snowden use QubesOS. What makes it much better then other distro? Would you use it for everyday tasks or is it overkill? What about Kali or Parrot-OS?
2) Your go-to privacy/security tools? Personally, I am always conencted to a VPN with openvpn (Killswitch on). In my browser (Firefox) I use UBlock and HttpsEverywhere. Used NoScript for a while but had more trouble then actual use with it (blocked too much). Search engine is DDG. All of my data is stored in VeraCrypt containers, so even if the system is compromised nobody is able to access any private data. Passwords are stored in KeePass. What other tools would you recommend?
3) What websites are you browsing for competent news reports in the it security scene? What websites can you recommend to find academic writeups/white papers about certain topics?
4) Google. Yeah a hate-love relationship, but its hard to completely avoid it. I do actually have a Google-Home device (dont kill me), which I use for calender entries, timers, alarms, reminders, and weather updates as well as IOT stuff such as turning my LED lights on and off. I wouldn"t mind switching to an open source solution which is equally good, however so far I couldnt find anything that would a good option. Suggestions?
5) What actions do you take to secure your phone and prevent things such as being tracked/spyed? Personally so far I havent really done much except for installing AdAway on my rooted device aswell as the same Firefox plugins I use on my desktop PC.
6) Are there ways to create mirror images of my entire linux system? Every now and then stuff breaks, that is tedious to fix and reinstalling the system takes a couple of hours. I remember from Windows that software such as Acronis or Paragon can create a full image of your system that you can backup and restore at any point to get a stable, healthy system back (without the need to install everything by hand).
7) Would you encrypt the boot partition of your system, even tho all data is already stored in encrypted containers?
8) Any other advice you can give :P ?12 -
I just found this in my "Religious views" info on FB, thought I would share it even tho it's just a paste from somewhere. Don't slaughter me if this is a reoccuring thing on here😂
THE 0x17'RD PSALM
The Computer is my taskmaster; I need not think.
He maketh me to write flawless reports
He leadeth me with Computer-Aided Instruction
He restoreth my jumbled files
He guideth me through the program with menus.
Yea, though I walk through the valley of
the endless GOTO,
I will fear no error messages;
For thy User's Manual is with me.
Thy disk drive and thy Pac-Man-they comfort me.
Thou displayest a spreadsheet program before me
in the presence of my supervisor.
Thou enableth the printout;
the floor runneth over (with paper).
Surely good jobs and good pay shall follow me
All the days of my life;
And I shall access your CPUs, forever.1 -
Back in grammar school we started programming in TI-Basic on a TI89 Titanium as it was part of math class (calculus and geometry). I didn't really understand much because the teacher thought it was a great idea to start with recursively calculating GCD (and we were in a sort of "linguist profile", nobody had ever touched a line of code in their lives before). I still liked it though and by some coincidence I got an old Win95 compaq notebook to play with from a friend.
I started playing around with the CMD prompt and batch files and could apply some of the things I had learned on the TI, like GOTO or If statements. I still didn't know what I was doing of course, and so it happened that I used the > file pipe when trying to compare two values. Suddenly there was a file with some code fragments and I started to get what I had done. I put the file pipe into an endless GOTO loop and was amused how those few lines filled up the whole desktop with nonsense files. I went on to refine this a little so I could control it with another file that acted as a kill switch when present. Over the next weeks I played some more with it and made it write out and start another batch file that would check whether the original script was still there and recreate it if not.
That notebook was so large and heavy I could not bring it to school, so I wrote all code by hand on paper and typed it in when I got home, that way I could still code in class when I was bored and no one would notice.
So my first ever "program" that I wrote myself was some lousy malware.5 -
Well, my country aint very bright at least for me.
So you have few options, i will arrange them from generally percieved as shittiest place to best place.
You are student or whatever and work in small company. Thats where lot of people are stuck. Like me. Pay is... Sigh. When you hear dev can earn more than 1k$/mo its like "yes, yes, gimme, gimme". Forget about beeing just dev. If I left my company it would collapse within week, but bosses greed is insanity. Oh well.
Than you have that middleground that I would love to be in. Freelancing. Here freelancers can live really well if they can find contractors willing to pay for their services. Wuthin this space there is most profit but also that uncertanity. But its my goto.
Than you have miniscule group you **really** want to be in, medium companies writing software, usually b2b. Well, here you get often 2k$+ and bonuses for working your ass off etc, and benefits are minor but there is usually *something*
And than you have corporations. They often pay a lot, lot of benefits, but.... Its corporation, all ypu learned in small companies usually goes through the window, their expectations are high etc.
In my country everything is like everywhere else but pay is much less, especially in small company space, and somewhat smallish in medium company/corpo. Freelancers are least affected.4 -
Goto the play store and look for a flashlight, you'd find thousands of apps.
So what's the big idea? Well the big problem here is the whopping millions of downloads each one of them has
Let's assume there are a 1000 flashlight apps and I assure you there are!
1000* 1 million users... Either that or people exist with weird fantasies of collecting flashlight apps11 -
While calling a tech company:
10 *music starts playing*
20 "You're second in queue"
30 GOTO 10
Is it so fucking difficult to let the music continue so I won't have to hear the same 10 seconds of the beginning of this already annoying song?!
When I finally get connected they tell me my order won't be in stock for another month... I just want my beautiful monitor 😭1 -
!tech
recently i have been realising that i am utterly lonely. their isn't a group of people in life (apart from my parents) who aren't either paid to be with me (i.e office colleagues) or i am paying to be with them (i.e gym) and its very sad.
i don't have any siblings. the relatives are on sour terms, so no one visit. my parents are mostly loveless and the whole family is just focusing on sustaining than living or enjoying. i recently had some arguments with my friends and now they too are not on talking terms. .
I am a 25 year old, short , somewhat chubby guy in the most boring and safe field with no interesting interests except an average guy stuff ( cars, stocks, tech, career, sports... things that guys usually discuss).
I have been told on face that my vibe isn't interesting and i can honestly accept that . i myself wouldn't want to be with someone like me. if you are girl, then i will probably be talking to you for 30 seconds of joke-cum-fun-cum-serious-cum-caring stuff( i usually have 1-2 lines of witty stuff prepared) before going all silent and boring you the fuck out.
the next convo will be followed by an even dumber sentence but i will try to end it with a geeky joke or reference and a small laugh prompting you to also smile or fake laugh. and if you did that, then i will be desperate to keep you laughing, but my sentences will keep on getting more dumber and boring until you leave and categorise me as the most boring idiot/ "nice guy" you met. ( and meanwhile i am at the mental stage where i love you as the most precious thing of my world and imagining kids and life with you)
I can't care for anyone. I have seen too much parent fights, empty walls, money issues to understand how to care for anyone . my life is focused and sad.
shall i go on giving chocolates to everyyone in office to be popular? shall i ask a random gorl on the stret for her phone number? shall i start strolling in the park and try to talk to people? honestly, if i were a girl and someone does this to me, i would be shit scared and creeped out than falling for that guy.
then how the fuck i land myself into someone who wants to be with me? do i even want someone to be with me? or is loneliness the only thing i want?
i feel pretty okay for the most part of the day in this loneliness, except at some weird times like when am eating a platefu9 of chinese alone in some shop, or at night when i lock the door of a 9x9 large room and realise that i am the only one here.
i was once excited to grow up and do grown-up stuff like drive a car, take a solo tour, goto vaccination in every few days, be adventurous . but that has changed . i did all these things when i had people in my life. i somewhat felt motivated to do those, seeing that there were people who wanted to be with me during/after these things and care about me. now it just feels pointless.9 -
Oh BASIC night, the LEDs are brightly glinting;
It is the night of the dear GOSUB’s birth!
Long lay the world in sin and error printing,
Till you appeared and the RAM felt its worth.
Shiver of fear, line numbers do inspire,
For yonder breaks a mostly harmless GOTO.
Fall on your bits, O hear the Visual voices!
O BASIC divine, O BASIC where GOTO was born!
O BASIC, O Holy BASIC, O BASIC, you’re mine!
Some want to say, “GOTO is harmful always,”
But what of them, in their post-modern world.
We PRINT the truth, in the line-numbered goodness,
But Dijkstra appeared, and the faith, it was lost.
A thrill of hope, when .NET BASIC announces,
But Visual BASIC, what kind of thing are you?
Fall on your GUI, O see the old line numbers!
Behold BASICA, O BASIC when DOS was born!
O numbers, O lines, spaghetti divine!
Source: http://changelog.complete.org/archi...2 -
Software development lifecycle:
Step 1: Take shortcuts to get the project done in time.
Step 2: Wait for shit to hit the you know what
Step 3: Goto Step 14 -
1. Hard reset his Android phone
2. Install the same junk apps again
3. Complain why the phone is lagging
4. goto 1.1 -
I do not think that GoTo is bad. It can lead to hellish code but if you don't misuse it - it can be extremely useful.6
-
function myLife(time){
if(time.current() < time.alarm1)
sleep();
if(time.current() = time.alarm1){
wakeUp();
if(tired || hungover){
snooze();
sleep();
} else{
getReady(speed.Normal);
goTo(work, speed.Normal);
doMyJob(function(){
goTo(home);
});
}
}
if(time.current() = time.alarm2){
wakeUp();
if(tired || hungover){
snooze();
sleep();
} else{
getReady(speed.Fast);
goTo(work, speed.Normal);
doMyJob(function(){
goTo(home);
});
}
}
if(time.current() >= time.alarm3){
wakeUp();
if(tired || hungover){
workFromHome();
} else{
goTo(work, speed.Fast);
doMyJob(function(){
goTo(home);
});
}
}
}3 -
Found in kernel/sched.c in Linux 1.2:
The "confuse_gcc" goto is used only to get better assembly code..
Dijkstra probably hates me.
https://git.kernel.org/pub/scm/...3 -
Again found myself before deadline. My excuse? I'm more productive during the deadline rush :D
How everyone else sees it: you fucked up
What do I say to myself: never again!!!
```
sleep(until_next_deadline);
goto begining_of_this_post;
``` -
How do you folks handle your pagination at backend?
I was initially using skip and limit. But that is prone to error.
Then I thought about using last sent items id and using its created_at time and fetching rows/documents after that. But that too is prone to error ( more than one can have same timestamp) hence either having data repeats or data That gets missed.
What is your goto strategy for pagination?8 -
I need to stop treating an OO language as if it were a procedural language.
I have the tendency to turn my code into GOTO spaghetti even though I'm semi-aware that objects exist and that they are distinct.
I still have to get used to this paradigm.
My Java professor always swore by the Plato paradigm, i.e.:
""Platonism" and its theory of Forms (or theory of Ideas) denies the reality of the material world, considering it only an image or copy of the real world.
According to this theory of Forms there are at least two worlds: the apparent world of concrete objects, grasped by the senses, which constantly changes, and an unchanging and unseen world of Forms or abstract objects, grasped by pure reason (λογική). which ground what is apparent." (wikipedia)
Thinking in objects, abstractions and metaphysics is not something I haven't done before (I've practiced it during Sociology and Ethics with the whole Pascal Leibniz, Newton and DesCartes approach) but it's certainly not easy.
Then there was my cool Programming 201 professor who said: "Don't worry man, just read those great UML, Program Design and GOF books and it will all become easy, like a story. It'll all make sense.
I mean, I've graduated, I've passed my Software Engineering I, II and III (hard as hell) but since I haven't focused on those theories and practices anymore, I've lost my touch.
It's definitely not easy for a novice programmer to transition between paradigms..10 -
It's a fucking shame computed goto didn't make it into the C standard.
It's by far my favorite non-standard feature of C. Writing this VM would suck without it.17 -
"Refractor this method to reduce its Cognitive Complexity from 110 to 15 allowed."
*Pan*
Ok let's do it :
label : for(....) {
if(...){
for(.....){
If(...){
....
break label;
}
}
}
}
*Pan Pan*1 -
I am my teams goto guy for anything and everything. For any problem they face technically.
They think I am some kind of genius. But in reality I just Google. :/ I don't know most of the things they ask!
The saving grace is that, whenever I try to solve anything, the pieces of the puzzle quickly fall into their places in my head.
Now the impostor syndrome is kicking in hard!1 -
Today I've confirmed that there actually are real developers that aren't monkeys in my company and team.
Me: {discussing how to fix something, he said we will use some new tech} ... So how do you up with all this latest tech?
Him: https://www.thoughtworks.com/radar
Me; Thanks! I was thinking it was just a web dev skill :) I mean looking at it package.json, I always think how can someone pick all these modules for a single app... And there's always a new JS framework.
Him: You goto sleep knowing be day will bring new frameworks to keep up on :D
So yea there are actually people here that actually know what they're doing... -
I was expecting that my insomnia would be less annoying since I don't have to go out anymore for anything but food shopping.
Nope. This little bitch is still very annoying.
I swear if I get a headache tomorrow while staring at computer screen during work hours, I'm gonna shoot myself. (figuratively, not really)3 -
12 Stages of Software Development:
1. Analysis.
2. Development
3. Realization the whole analysis is complete bullshit and has nothing to with reality.
4. Denial about failing deadlines.
6. "Acceleration": adding more people to the project, bringing out big corner cutting machine.
7. Learning that massive amount of new features needs to be added, while the deadline is two weeks away.
8. Putting some random crap in production, riddled with horrid bugs and security flaws, to technically not miss the deadline.
9. Get the mess almost working long after the deadline has passed.
10. Maintain this steaming pile of crap for a year.
11. Start planning for full system rewrite that "Makes Everything Better".
12. Goto 12 -
Oh.... Fuck.....
I have an SSD.... but it's taken more than 10 mins to changed from 25 to 26%...
And it just restarted....
Now it's at 30%...
Now 50%...
I'm gonna goto dinner now and pray that I don't need to reinstall Windows...
btw I'm atheist...
6 -
Does anyone remember BASIC?
10 PRINT "Hello World!"
20 GOTO 10
I learned it when I had my Commodore 64. Recently I've gotten the itch to dive back in the development world. So I'm refreshing my memory on HTML and CSS (yes I know they're not programming languages) then move on to JavaScript and either React or Angular. Hopefully I will be able to contribute more to discussion on here than just lurk.19 -
!tech #off_my_chest
when I look back to the earlier years of my life, I see nothing but loneliness. I had no friends in school, people didn't sit with me, only a few people barely talked with me and it was a mess.
I used to blame my parents for it: I thought they isolated me in a lot of areas which lead to hampering my growth and relations.
However, I recently got a taste of my old days and realized the root cause of the problem: DISEASES.
I used to be a very weak and sick child. I had extreme cough so much so that i will go on coughing for 1 min in every 2 mins. Cough hasn't touched me in last 10 years, but recently i caught cough again and it lead to a whole lot of revelations.
I currently have a good social network. I have one friend from past 10 years with whom I used to goto the park every day. I took off this park routine for 2 days citing sickness and he was worried. So once I felt better on 3rd day, i went to the park with him. While walking I again started coughing (albeit very less), but I could notice his expressions. he wanted to just get out of this whole situation. Next day, he didn't even bothered to message, and when i did, he started making excuses.
I had another group of home friends, who are so close to me that we went for snacks at any random time on any random day. Last year i went onto 3 road trips with them. but last weekend they straight up declined meeting me saying get better first.
---------------------------
I don't blame any of my friends or parents.
no one wants to be around a sick person, thinking that if the situation worsens, then the ill guy might need help that they couldn't provide, and if the situation went out of hand, then they would be the one to blame. And it's not just my illness, I think this might apply to anyone with an illness or a disability. everyone treats them as liabilities or time ticking bombs
Everyone wants to be in a homogenous group of healthy people with no one having any life problems so everyone could enjoy a movie life.
Guess what? THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS!!
People are at different stages of life in terms of age, knowledge, power, health, and finances. in a group of 5, if people come together to watch a movie, there maybe 1 person who is giving away his evening's dinner money for affording the tickets. another might be missing out on her sick grandma or office work just to be part of this one gathering for 3 hours.
And regarding ill people, we are not your responsibility once we are out of our patient bed!
I understand that I might need my friend's help in calling my parents or an ambulance if the situation worsens, but isn't that normal for healthy people too? what if 2 guys are walking on the street and one is hit by a car? won't the other call the ambulance?
And suppose My friend is not able to the help I needed, would I blame him for it?
NO!
Absolutely no! It was my decision to go out and meet people even when sick even if it was a risky move. Life only goes forward if we take risks. But if it backfired, then the instance where he was not able to help would be much less significant than the instance where i decided to get up and go out. That would be the only major blame area and the only person to blame would be me, myself!
The sick is just an inconvenience on people's souls, that's it.
--------
This whole experience makes me so worried about my office and professional situation. I am an excellent engineer working from home and this WFH has helped me keep my cough from worsening while working in a professional capacity.
But our office is shifting to WFO and that is a concern.
1. being in a different state, and working in office takes so much attention and focus that i often forget eating lunch or going to washroom. idk how i will treat my sickness if i got sick there.
2. being in home, i can do my work without bothering other people with my cough. at office, people will want to sit away from me and that ewould be not possible. eventually i would be forced by people to take leaves to "get better" as am bothering everyone
3. if i don't get "better" soon, which is there definition of being healthy enough to come to the office without any sickness (even though my illness doesn't hamper my efficiency), they will fire me .
i am royally fucked. even when i get better, WFO will always have a negetive factor like this. for cases of self illness, family illness, parents illness, if you are not being an 'office' slave (just being the 'work' slave isn't enough), you won't get the money4 -
Too many people seem to think that "goto" in C is the worst thing you could do. It's an abomination, never use it! (Not something I've seen here per se, just generally around)
Challenge:
Break out of a loop inside a loop without using goto, and make it look pretty. Seriously, I don't think it can be done, and goto just makes it so clean!7 -
Is it sad that I look forward to the weekend so that I can actually write some code rather than:
- Helping clients that can’t / won’t read docs
- Explaining to test colleagues that we need repro steps and can’t fix a bug based on “I was doing something and it crashed”
- Writing any regular expressions for another dev where it’s more complicated than ^[A-Z0-9]*$
- Wading through legacy VBA that’s littered with GoTo, global variables (even i, j and k for loops are fucking global!) and all the other fucking lazy shortcuts that save you 10 seconds at dev time and cost you (which ends up meaning me) hours in subsequent debugging.
I love writing code, and I think I’m pretty good at it, so can I please just get on with it?
Fellow ranters, please tell me I’m not alone in this. -
I've been working from home for 3 months yay!) but today was the nicest day off the year so far so decided to goto office.
Well seems everyone else thought that too and also the trains were delayed. i.e. I had to stand all the way...
No big deal except... apparently I am way out shape now...
was planning to go walk around NYC too like I do every Spring/Summer (~1-2 miles).... Looks like I'm gonna need some prep this time... 😞😓😭🤕😧2 -
I'm wondering if the computer let me win...
Up to now it was ahead and got me on the ropes... Granted I haven't played an actual Go game in years...
But then somehow it made a mistake? here... A 100 point game turning mistake... which I don't notice until 30+ moves later
Maybe I should just goto sleep.... It's actually 2:30am here...
3 -
Guys, do you agree that C++ is getting overly complicated following the updated versions?
At times I wonder whether I should leave C++ and jump to python as my goto programming language.24 -
Happy 2023, may all your gym memberships be worth while, this time🙃
On a serious note though, what's your goto blogging platform these days?
Beyond Wordpress because well, let's not trigger PTSD for some of us, what are you gals and guys using in 2023?4 -
Magento Debugging Horror!
Changing lots of things in magento with no problem. Continuing development for quite sometime. Suddenly decide to clear cache to see affect of a change on a template in frontent. Suddenly magento crashes! There's no error message. No exception log. No log in any file anywhere on the disk. All that happens is that magento suddenly returns you to the home page!
Reverting all the changes to the template. Clear the cache. Nope! Still the same! Why? Because the problem has happened somewhere in your code. Magento just didn't face it, because it was using an older version of your code. How? Because magento 2 even caches code! Not the php opcache. Don't get me wrong. It has it's own cache for code, in a folder called generated. Now that you cleared all the caches including this folder, you just realized that, somewhere something is wrong. But there is no way for you to know where as there is absolutely no exception logged anywhere!
So you debug the code, from index.php, down to the deepest levels of hell. In a normal php code, once the exception happens, you should see the control jumps to an exception handler, there, you can see the exception object and its call stack in your debugger. But that's not the case with magento.
Your debugger suddenly jumps to a function named:
write_close();
That's all. No exception object. No call stack. No way to figure out why it failed. So you decide to debug into each and every step to figure out where it crashes. The way magento renders response to each request is that, it calls a plugin, which calls a plugin loop, which calls another plugin, which calls a list of plugins, which calls a plugin loop, which calls another plugin.....
And if in each step, just by accident, instead of step through, you use the step over command of your debugger, the crash happens suddenly and you end up with the same freaking write_close() function with no idea what went wrong and where the error happened! You spend a whole day, to figure out, that this is actually a bug in core of magento, they simply introduced after your recent update of magento core to the latest STABLE version!!! It was not your mistake. They ruined their own code for the thousandth of time. You just didn't notice it, because as I said, you didn't clear the `generated` folder, therefore using an older version of everything!
Now that after spending 7 hours figuring out what has failed with absolutely no standard way of debugging and within a spaghetti of GOTO commands (Magento calls them plugin), why not report it to github? So you report it with a pull request. This also takes 1 hour of your time. Just to next day get informed that your pull request is rejected because another person already fixed the bug and made the same pull request. It was just not on the latest stable version yet!
So you decide to avoid updating magento as much as possible. Because you know that the next Stable version will make your life and career unstable. But then the customer complains that the Admin Panel is warning him of using old Magento version which might pose SECURITY THREATS! -
CNC software
Hey guys
what do you guys use to control your DIY CNCs?
I'm using UGS, Universal Gcode Platform, but it has a slight problem... doesn't work with functions.
Meaning, I just had to write a 75 lines program that could be an 8 line program If I could use loops and GOTO...
Also, what CAM software do you use?13 -
#define AUDIOLB_EXIT_ON_ERROR(hres) \
if (FAILED(hres)) { goto Exit; }
#define AUDIOLB_SAFE_RELEASE(punk) \
if ((punk) != NULL) \
{ (punk)->Release(); (punk) = NULL; }
Looking through old audio code I wrote. Found these macros. Will most likely reuse for a new project. It works damnit!
Do you feel lucky?!7 -
Trying to hack/block in app video ads for the last hour... Well that was a waste for time.... Now to get up now and goto work.
Hows ur morning?5 -
TLDR: Decision making is hard...
Get up at 7am, weather looks crappy but need go to the Drs today in NYC.
Original plan was to spend the morning in the park catching up on my reading list. Don't really want to goto the park now but lunch is still good? (Appt at 4pm, was only one left)
Walk into train station, pay for ticket. Get email from Drs saying he's sick...
Oh good... Except I already paid for the ticket.
Decide it's not worth it since weather is crap.
Walk out the station and... it's sunny... Fck...
Now what.... I can either go home and code or go shopping locally and eat out.
Currently decisions these and well shopping and eating out are also hard decisions...
-
working at an MNC is like dating the hottest girl in campus. everyone stares at you, but only you know of the tantrums and the expenses that you have to take.
Every random aunty and uncle I come across gets a wide smile on their face when i tell them my company's parent company name. i goto this temple , and there, one uncle was introducing me to his wife "meet X ji's son , he is at Y company" .
previously when i worked at a startup, most of the time , people were like "huh? what does this company do?" and when i would explain them how our DBs are sending billions of notifications and interaction each second, they would be like "oh , so you work at IT" , YES DUDE, YOU WANNA GIVE YOUR DAUGHTER'S HAND NOW?
And this mentality is sick. i loathe the place where i currently work. i loved my previous org and now am just here coz my mom is too scared to let her son live in a different state.
The only reason a person works in a company is money and WLB. Indian service based MNCs don't give a penny more than basic industry standards. and when they want their employees to be available 2 days a week + x number of days when any CEO , ED or other sugar daddy is coming to office, you get an idea of the shitty Work life balance.
my previous company was a b2b startup, it always paid me more than industry standards and we had wfh until a notification came to enforce hybrid working bh end of 2024. till now not a single person from my team has relocated. All i had to do was to *plan* for living in a state and my mom got cold feet :/
i think so much about my future. i earn decent, so i wanna spend it to live and grow.
i wanna go party at friday nights and go on night outs. i wanna meet this cute school crush at anytime after office and don't worry about the 9 pm curfew. i wanna go look for a new home in a different area and get out of this parking hellhole. i wanna prepare for exams and do a hugher studies from aborad.
everything needs money and growth mindset. money makes money and i am trying to earn every minute. but a chained mind cannot fly . a non growth mindset will not let you evolve. and someone needs to tell it to people who control my every . fucking. action
i have seen people switching from one big name to another. i personally feel that you are just too comfortable in the environment of big names and deliberately ignoring the smaller names which are doing the actual build fast and break reality stuff. reward is proportional to risk and if you are okay with just attributing to a big name, then that's on you20 -
Phps love of nested arrays is similar to that of structured programing and goto statements. You will do a lot of backtracking in both of them to see where things start. God bless PHP.
3 -
1) git init
2) organize the structure of the project and check what features you need
3) google the name of the features and search a module that solves it
4) follow the module's tutorial step by step
5) compile the code
6) notice it doesn't work
7) StackOverflow, github, Quora, emails with insults to developers, parcel posts with bombs, try suicide
8) ascertain you could have spent all that time in funnier or more productive tasks
9) right click on project -> delete
10) forget the previous experience
11) goto 1 -
The problem with moving Docker containers from your decked-out dev machine to a VM on AWS when your boss has told you to keep costs down:
1. Start Micro instance, 1++ gig memory
2. Get Out of Memory error from app after 30 minutes
3. Goto 1 -
It feels like I cannot take it anymore, waking up to goto work at 9 feels unbearable for a hacker. My mind doesn't work and it's routine as fuck. How do you guys do it?4
-
the colleagues discuss their juvenile motorbike memories and i am sitting aside like
10 print 'i tried to code'
20 goto 10 -
I feel sad about being in a standstill position in my life right now. everything feels like stopped, and i am not growing.
My only source of income is my job, which does pays well, but not much. I have been in this job for 6 months (3rd job in 3 years) and although it is satisfying in terms of the work i do, everything else is just bleh. quantity of work is a lot, there is chaos everywhere, bosses are incompetent and demanding and worst of all , its hybrid, so am wasting 2-3 days every week.
apart from work, i struggle to make myself useful. outside work hours, i want to earn more money, health, popularity and power.
- for health, i goto gym , which hopefully is the onlh thing going correct in my life. although am not getting any major transformation, the feeling of pain among my muscles feels good and people seems to know me somewhat in there.
- for money, popularity and power , am again at a still.
--- power comes from popularity and money.
--- money comes from ability to influence(and optionally with knowledge) .
--- popularity also comes with knowledge and/or ability to influence.
--- knowledge can be bought/learned.
- above all are my guesses. i haven't yet cracked the exact dependency graph in here. but the simplest thing to get is knowledge and i have been trying to get a hold of it, but in vain
- i have tried a lot of stuff in last 3 years :
--- get better in android ( which i did by working professionally) ,
--- learn web frontend (html/css/js/react, etc ., for which i took courses and i know them now somewhat ) ,
--- learn web backend ( spring, node, flask, aws, etc .,for which i took courses/videos)
--- learn no code stuff (markdown generators, wordpress etc , for which i tried as hobby)
--- learn ios/hybrid stuff(flutter, react native etc, for ehich i watched videos, did courses etc)
- the problem is, am just good at one thing (android) and have a limited knowledge (5-30%) of all the others. companies won't pay me more to be a mediocre full stack dev than what they are paying me now to be a decent junior android dev
- the areas where i lack as of now is DS,Algo, Competitive programming and System designing. these are skills expected for someone trying to crack a good fortune 5xx company
- i am not so sure if i want to do these since there isn't a guarantee whether i will be happy to be in google or amazon. i could guess the amount they would pay me for being a mediocre full stack dev.
- i am not even sure if its good for me to change jobs every few months. i contribute heavily wherever i go, nd i leave at the moment am about to receive a probable reward(probable promotion/increment) for a more concrete reward ( the definite increment from a job switch)
- my existing knowledge is being wasted like the various uselss courses i did in college as i am unable to find a usecase for them. i am tired of making useless jira clones , caclulators and portfolio pages for myself which no one will be using or appreciating.
- keeping the whole tech life aside, my family runs the blood of businessmen and i am not able to progress in that as well. my father was an average grocery shop owner whose shop is now on rent and who is now doing a sales job too. however, their family shop with grandfather and brothers was once a very popular and money minting business 40 years ago.
- i sometimes feel i could do good in business area, but i am a complete blank slate in that department with no one to support (my father is old now)
- alongside non career problems ( midlife crisis, money shortage, no friends ), life feels pretty stagnant right now :/13 -
I finally got my new home server.
A Lenovo ThinkCentre M720q in one of the higher configurations.
Any ideas what top level OS I should put on it?
ATM, I'm thinking Proxmox, ESX or Alpine.
I like proxmox because of the neat UI for everything but I'm kinda worried about how it basically takes the most important parts of the system over.
I like Alpine since I already use it for quite a while as my goto server OS and because of AWALL, which IMHO is the best linux server firewall.
I didn't get to evaluate ESX yet.6 -
Music on, use half an hour on selecting project to work on, start working and forget time... Realize it's 4am and goto sleep 😐
-
I started to learn coding at school using RM Basic. I made a script with an infinite loop using goto that flashed the screen different colours and said error on it. I left it running. Found out later the it guy took the computer away for "repair"...
-
Currently learning go and I’m really enjoying it. It’s been a while since I learnt a new programming language and the experience is different to what I remember. I’m reading an o reilly book and when about how they implemented a common feature of programming I’m like oh no they didn’t. I think this is what normal feel when they read celebrity gossip. Hash tag goto.2
-
Life of an tech lead.
Hire a candidate with little to no experience in relevant technology - > train said resource - > resource becomes productive - > plan enhancements as work load can be shared. - > resource switches projects or firm - > goto step 1 and overtime to complete enhancements. FML1 -
What is your goto style of music? What is your empowering 'lets do this' or " I'm in the zone" thing?
For me I have a collection of various genres of music I've collected over time and I slap together several songs at the days start and get going.
Usually I end up looping a single high energy song all day (rock usually. Especially older rock)13 -
I'm starting on C# and some of the lesson plans out there dont make sense. So far Bob Tabor and Plural Sight has helped me half way and the bulgarian shark book too. What has helped you cross that threshold past the basics. I'm stuck on structs, namespaces, sort algorithms, sql and json.6
-
My consuming cycle:
1. An urge to buy a new shiny thing. No peace of mind if I refuse to buy it. My brain starts to generate sentences like "Treat yourself", "Why are you even living if you can't buy what you want", etc.
2. Acquisition. Immense guilt about the money spent. My brain somehow classifies any non-electronic thing that costs more than $30 as "ridiculously expensive", no matter how much money I make, no matter my reserves.
3. A short period of... no, not peace of mind. It's just an absence of that urge. I can't quite call it "peace".
4. goto 1
Hyperconsumerism is hell. I don't want my life to be ridden by guilt. I want to break that cycle, but when I try, it's just me asking that blaming questions to myself.
Somehow I probably got an answer. I should make my everyday thought process and patterns independent of buying stuff. Money shouldn't define what I do and what I think about.
Everything I need with an exception of medicines is both factually cheap and perceived as cheap, and I don't feel guilty about buying medicines.
What should I aim my thought process to? I'm tired of programming, because it provokes an entirely different kind of guilt, the guilt of "you shouldn't be resting, go write that article, go study that new web shit, go build that another open source thing (that nobody cares about)".
Art makes me a bit happier though. I studied 20th century progressive art a bit, and appreciating the ideas behind certain pieces of design, architecture and fine arts make me feel superior than other people, and also superior than my past self. I don't know if it's healthy or not, I'm just being honest now.
I think I need more art in my life. For now, I'm fine with knowing that I'll probably never create a real piece of art (aside from programming), so at least I can consume art instead of buying worthless shit that doesn't make me happy anyway.5 -
I am having an introspective moment as a junior dev.
I am working in my 3rd company now and have spent the avg amount of time i would spent in a company ( 1- 1.5 years)
I find myself in similar problems and trajectories:
1. The companies i worked for were startups of various scales : an edtech platform, an insurance company (branch of an mnc) and a b2b analytics company
2. These people hire developers based on domain knowledge and not innovative thinking , and expect them to build anything that the PMs deem as growth/engagement worthy ( For eg, i am bad at those memory time optimising programming/ ds/algo, but i can make any kind of android screen/component, so me and people like me get hired here)
3. These people hire new PMs based on expertise in revenue generation and again , not on the basis of innovative thinking, coz most of the time these folks make tickets to experiment with buttons and text colors to increase engagement/growth
4. The system goes into chaos mode soon since their are so many cross operating teams and the PMs running around trying to boss every dev , qa and designer to add their changes in the app.
5. meanwhile due to multiple different teams working on different aspects, their is no common data center with up to date info of all flows, products and features. the product soon becomes a Frankenstein monster.
6. Thus these companies require more and more devs and QAs which are cogs in the system then innovative thinkers . the cogs in the system will simply come, dimwittingly add whatever feature is needed and goto home.
7. the cogs in system which also start taking the pain of tracking the changes and learning about the product itself becomes "load bearing cogs" : i.e the devs with so much knowledge of the product that they can be helpful in every aspect of feature lifecycle .
8. such devs find themselves in no need for proving themselves , in no need for doing innovative work and are simply promoted based on their domain knowledge and impact.
My question is simply this : are we as a dev just destined to be load bearing cogs?
we are doing the work which ideally a manager should be doing, ie maintaining confluence docs with end to end technical as well as business logic info of every feature/flow.
So is that the only definition of a Software Engineer in a technical product?
then how come innovations happen in companies like meta Microsoft google open ai etc?
if i have to guess as a far observer, i would say their diversity in different fields helps them mix and match stuff and lead to innovative stuff.
For eg, the android os team in google has helped add many innovative things in google cloud product and vice versa.
same is with azure and windows . windows is now optomissed to run in cloud machines when at one point it was just a horrible memory hogging and slow pc OS
for small companies, 1 ideology/product/domain is their hero ideology/product/domain .
an insurance company tries to experiment with stuff related to insurances,health,vehicles,and the best innovations they come up with is "lets give user a discount in premium if they do 5000 steps a day for an year".
edtech would say "lets do live streaming for children apart from static videos"
but Android team at google said , "since ai team is doing so well, lets include ai in various system apps and support device level models" ~ a much larger innovation as 2 domains combined to make a product
The small companies are not aiming to be an innovative product, they are just aiming to be a monopoly product. and this is kinda sad2 -
More Cool Coding Team Names and Programming Team Names
Error By Night
Bit Legion
Ctrl Intelligence
System React
Fuzz Exception
Goto Hub Gargoyle
Byte Panache
Flip Framework
Syntax Terminators
Twister Boot
Swift Script Doozies
Github Architects
Angular Ajax
😂7 -
So some of the C++ guys I deal with have this thing in their mind that they know all the other languages cause they're similar right, and they argue that it doesn't work vice versa.You know Java, you don't know c++
Simple advice to people out there who meet such people is to just ask them to make a Java program with the goto command
Little know it all freaks.11 -
1987 at seven years old. Dad bought me an Atari ST. It came with a Language Disc, containing the ST Basic program. Didn't know what it was, but dad learned from the guy in the shop it was for making your own programs.
So along with a manual, together we wrote our first program:
10 PRINT "ST";
20 GOTO 10
RUN
In the corner window, the results unravelled. I was so excited. Never looked back. -
<?php
date_default_timezone_set('Asia/Kolkata');
$current_time = date('Y-m-d H:i:s');
$alarm = new DateTime('2016-06-13 04:05:00');
if( $current_time == $alarm)
{
wake_up();
eat('suhur');
pray('fajr');
browse('devRant');
browse('Instagram');
sleep(18000);
}
shower();
goto('friends office');
browse('YouTube');
work(14400);
pray('zuhr');
pray('asr');
goto('gym');
exercise(5400);
goto('home');
pray('maghrib');
eat('iftaar/dineer');
pray('isha');
goto('store');
work(7200);
goto('home');
sleep(7200);
?>11 -
So just got off the train to transfer to goto work...
Wait no I'm actually going home, I'm off this week! Just happens that I need to get off at the same stop...
Moment of realization felt sorta weird... ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ -
I "programmed" (or better changed code) long before I even knew this is programming. I basically changed levels in gorillas and nibbles back then during my DOS time thru trial and error by looking and guessing what was written there in the BASIC files. I basically used goto alot 😂.
Later I copied code listings from computer magazines that never worked but took days to type down. My first real programming experience where I bought a much to expensive book and went through it front to back was Java 1.1 or 1.2 ( don't know exactly anymore but it was no later than 1.2) and I learned it because there was this guy that told me about it and I wanted to find out what he was talking about. -
People, help me out.
(first some abstract thoughts)
I am a final year undergrad yet to take steps in the world and i am trying to figure out what to do with my time, what my end goal and next steps should be.
As of now I think my end goal is "relaxation , peace and happiness of me and my loved ones", and to reach there , i need money.
My younger self chose engineering for a particular reason(that i vaguely remember) and weather it was a right or wrong/illogical decision, i guess i am stuck with it and have to use this only to reach my end goal.
Maybe i am regretting this and want to change. Maybe i am just a lazy ass who is bad in his assigned role of an engineer and is running towards glitter in other fields, whatever it is , i am not going against the decision of my past and accepting my identity as an engineer.
I believe once i am able to achieve my goal( that am still not sure about but overall is a good one from general perspective), i guess i will be satisfied
------------------------------------------------
(enough with the deep stuff)
I want to learn how to "learn" . like i am always conflicted about what to do next once the tutor leaves my hand.
for eg, let's say i goto a site abc.
1. They got 1 course each for android , web dev and ai. I choose the web dev course and give my hardworking attention to it
( At this point my choice is usually based on the fact that <A> i should not be stupid to buy all 3 course even if i have money/desire to buy all of em because riding 2 horses is only going to break my ass and <B> some pseudo stats like whichever got more opportunity, which i "like", etc(Point B is usually useless in the long run i guess) )
2. From what i have experienced, these courses usually have a particular list of topic that they cover and apply them to 1 or 2 projects. For eg, say that my web dev course taught me 20 something concepts of basic html/css/js/server and the instructor applied it to blog website
BUT WHAT IS NEXT ?
2.1.
>> Should I make more projects using only those particular list of concepts?
I usually have a ton of ideas that i want to implement now that i know how to build a blog site.
say i got a similar idea to make say url shortner. I start with full enthusiasm but in the middle way there is some new thing that i don't know and when i search the internet, i realize that there are 5 ways to implement such concept, making me wander off towards a whole list of concepts that were not covered in my original 20 concept course. This makes the choice 2. 2
2.2
>> Should I just leave everything , go to docs and start learning concepts from the scratch ??
Usually when i start a project, i soon realize that the original 20 concepts were just the tip of iceberg and there are a ton of things one should know, like how os works, how a particular component interacts with another, how the language is working, how the compiler is executing, etc .
At that point i feel like tearing all my notes away, and learning every associated thing from the scratch. No matter how much my project suffers, i want to know how the things are working from the bottom , like how the requests are being mad, how the routes are working, etc which might not even be relevent for the project.
Why i want to follow approach 2? because of the Goal from abstract thoughts. in theory, having deep knowledge is going to clear my interview thereby getting me a good job.
I will get good money, make projects faster and that will be a happily ever after story.
But in practical this approach is bringing me losses and confusion. every layer of a particular thing i uncover, turns out there is another layer below that. The learning never stops. Plus my original project remained incomplete.
What is your opinon, how do you figure out what to do next?8 -
Is it "goto" still a thing?
Ran today into a 1k lines haywire method which calls itself (not recursive) with "goto" on labels within it. A little hell.2 -
Ok so i Don't know spring and i have been asked to work on spring batch.So should i start learning directly from batch or should i go with spring first and then goto spring batch?
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Recently I've purchased a new laptop and so far it's working smoothly as I expected.
And yesterday I had a dream in which, laptop was got broken in the middle where the screen gets attached. And there was a last day for replacement as per return policy (idk really whether they allows if laptop got physical damage). But I was trying very hard to get the internet to submit a request for replacement and suddenly I woke up and very first I checked the laptop condition.
Anyway today I'll goto sleep and again will try to place replacement request for my laptop before date get expired.7 -
At 10pm I was ready to goto sleep... Feeling tired so I thought I'd just browse a bit of NLegs to start the weekend.
It's now 1am and I'm still awake... And look longer sleepy or at least until my adrenaline? goes down a bit...
The site admin tightened it's bot check so that I couldn't actor the full pictures....
Have to rewrite whole download module...
But I win again... For now.... -
If anyone is good with dart (or) other single threaded programming languages, i have this small doubt about the inner workings of the event loop and such and i would like an explanation if possible.
If you're too lazy to goto the link:
1. I have a future returned from a http request.
2. a future.then is declared that prints the http result.
3. A separate while(true) loop is declared that runs forever that just prints natural numbers.
4. the while loop also has an await future.delay that waits for 1ms before continuing with the next iteration
My question :
1. There's only one thread so how does the http download code run WHILE my main loop is still executing.
2. my future.then event is not processed unless i await a future.delay separately for 1ms. returning control to the event loop ? i don't get it how does adding an event help it process a prior event? It's FIFO ?
gist :https://gist.github.com/TheAnimatri...
discussion:
https://groups.google.com/a/...5 -
tldr: I am looking for recommendations for a basic website for my parents. GOTO question;
Pre-Story:
My parents have a small (offline) business. They have a website to give some general information and list their weekly offers.
When I felt that what has come out of the website-building tool (you know, clicky clicky stuff) looked a bit too early 2000's and is a total ripoff for what you get (almost 20€ per month), I created something with Google Sites for them. Feel free to roast me, but web development is not my field and now it looks much more modern, is mobile friendly and does what it is supposed to do. Weekly offers are edited in a google sheets file, which is embedded in the website. Not great, but this way my mom doesn't have to deal with editing a tables on the page - trust me, it won't look good. This also meant they could downgrade the hosting package to discard the clicky-tool and just the domain (maybe 1€ per month). The website itself is hosted for free by Google.
Some time ago GDPR became a thing and then I was tasked to have a look at it. (side note: I don't want to rant about being responsible for it, that's fine. My parents don't really ask me to do a lot for them.) You can't enter any data on the website, it's just very basic stuff and data protection wise there's just the "usual" stuff (cookies, embedded tools, logs). I added another site with a halfway complete privacy policy. Regarding the whole cookie issue (do not enforce unnecessary cookies) I couldn't find an easy solution. It's not 100%, but what can you really expect from a small business like this? I've seen worse.
Now to the question:
Can you recommend a good alternative to the current solution (Google Sites)?
It should be cheap (<3€/month incl. domain) and my parents should be able to make some basic changes (just text in predefined locations). I am not afraid to get my hands dirty - I can deal with some HTML, CSS, JS - but I don't want to sink a lot of time into this. No need for analytics or the like. Maybe a newsletter would be cool (with the weekly offers), but that's just a random thought of mine and definitely not necessary.
Thanks for reading :)18 -
i think i will start a thread of my rants against the new mnc laggards that i am supposed to join.
me vs my new job : part 4/n
so today is 29th, and after going through a major EXHAUSTING paperwork for the last 2 days (which included e-signing of papers from a literal govt portal that was down 90% time and i had to manually do polling on it to get it to work), i finally have the onboarding papers ready and i headed to office for laptop collection.
i was told that today the only formality that will happen is the laptop collection, so i scheduled all my personal stuff accordingly and planned to just goto the office, take the laptop and come back home. hardly a work of 3 hours, lets get it done by 11 am.
how the fuck did i forget that this is a sloth company :/
- i reached office at 10, and my spoc was not picking up the phone.
- after multiple tries, he picked up and told me that he is on leave and gave me the number of another.
- the other guy was not picking up, so i called him back. he said that the guy will start his shift at 11, so call him after 11 (?)
- i ended the call and bashed straight into office. asked someone where he sits, went there, and his mates told me that another guy was supposed to attend to me (hopefully i got saved by another redirect, once that guy had picked up his phone)
- what's more, the other guy told me that he had mailed my HR that i should be coming at 2 pm to recieve laptop(!?!) and laptop will not be ready before that.
- my hr fucking didn't tell me this and now its 11.15 and i am sitting in the lobby waiting for my laptop with no food, water or shit inside of me :/
with fuckery like this, I will either surrender and become one of the laggard like them, or become a rebel, just do my work and shit on their timings and redirects, and soon leave for a better shit :/
----------------------------------------
previous rants
part 3/n https://devrant.com/rants/6533348/...
somwhat part 2 and 1/n https://devrant.com/rants/6304423/...1 -
# rails manage.py runserver
Usage: ...
# python run server
/use/local/opt/python/bin/python2.7: can't find '__main__' module in 'run'
# npm server
Usage: npm <command> ...
# webpack s[TAB]
...
# [TAB]
...
# ./just_fckn_run_pls.sh
zsh: no such file or directory: ./just_fckn_run_pls.sh
# DO IT
zsh: correct DO to do [nyae]? n
zsh: command not found: DO
# exit
Thank you. Come again!
-- Dr. API Nahasapeemapetilon
============= Broken Pipe =============
10 GOTO PUB -
Ok new game! 6 degrees of @localhost
Where every rant is only 6 degrees away from @localhost
BEGIN
10 Scroll through some rants
20 random stop at a rant
30 click on that rant
40 Click on the user's name on rant
50 In there profile: click on +1's
60 Click on the first rant you see
GOTO 402 -
rant.author != this
Christ people. This is just sh*t.
The conflict I get is due to stupid new gcc header file crap. But what
makes me upset is that the crap is for completely bogus reasons.
This is the old code in net/ipv6/ip6_output.c:
mtu -= hlen + sizeof(struct frag_hdr);
and this is the new "improved" code that uses fancy stuff that wants
magical built-in compiler support and has silly wrapper functions for
when it doesn't exist:
if (overflow_usub(mtu, hlen + sizeof(struct frag_hdr), &mtu) ||
mtu <= 7)
goto fail_toobig;
and anybody who thinks that the above is
(a) legible
(b) efficient (even with the magical compiler support)
(c) particularly safe
is just incompetent and out to lunch.
The above code is sh*t, and it generates shit code. It looks bad, and
there's no reason for it.
The code could *easily* have been done with just a single and
understandable conditional, and the compiler would actually have
generated better code, and the code would look better and more
understandable. Why is this not
if (mtu < hlen + sizeof(struct frag_hdr) + 8)
goto fail_toobig;
mtu -= hlen + sizeof(struct frag_hdr);
which is the same number of lines, doesn't use crazy helper functions
that nobody knows what they do, and is much more obvious what it
actually does.
I guarantee that the second more obvious version is easier to read and
understand. Does anybody really want to dispute this?
Really. Give me *one* reason why it was written in that idiotic way
with two different conditionals, and a shiny new nonstandard function
that wants particular compiler support to generate even half-way sane
code, and even then generates worse code? A shiny function that we
have never ever needed anywhere else, and that is just
compiler-masturbation.
And yes, you still could have overflow issues if the whole "hlen +
xyz" expression overflows, but quite frankly, the "overflow_usub()"
code had that too. So if you worry about that, then you damn well
didn't do the right thing to begin with.
So I really see no reason for this kind of complete idiotic crap.
Tell me why. Because I'm not pulling this kind of completely insane
stuff that generates conflicts at rc7 time, and that seems to have
absolutely no reason for being anm idiotic unreadable mess.
The code seems *designed* to use that new "overflow_usub()" code. It
seems to be an excuse to use that function.
And it's a f*cking bad excuse for that braindamage.
I'm sorry, but we don't add idiotic new interfaces like this for
idiotic new code like that.
Yes, yes, if this had stayed inside the network layer I would never
have noticed. But since I *did* notice, I really don't want to pull
this. In fact, I want to make it clear to *everybody* that code like
this is completely unacceptable. Anybody who thinks that code like
this is "safe" and "secure" because it uses fancy overflow detection
functions is so far out to lunch that it's not even funny. All this
kind of crap does is to make the code a unreadable mess with code that
no sane person will ever really understand what it actually does.
Get rid of it. And I don't *ever* want to see that shit again. -
I finally have some motivation to write some personal code... on an existing project.
(Work has been too hectic the last few months so don't want to do anymore at home...)
Anyway... I noticed that my Prime Video Tracker app doesn't pick up some of the new Movies now available on Prime, so I did some fixing.
Good News (GN): The search URL is actually static so can goto the same URL for the same search results
GN: The program can filter the movies by a Minimum # of Ratings they have (currently set to 100... use to be 10)
Bad News (BN): The number of movies in the search results is over 5000 (used to be 100-200) so even with this filter, a lot get returned.
GN: the traversal is fully automated
BN: Need to manually look at the descriptions of each and add them the Watchlist
BN: I now have 200 movies on my Watchlist and still going...
So now I have another "Infinite list". Existing ones:
-TED Talks
-NLegs
-Blinkist Read List
-Comics (sort of, I have a huge backlog for Cyanide and Happiness)
-Photos that need "post-processing"
I'm pretty sure I'm forgetting some others...
-
Why is Java goto language for most backend systems, distributed and scalable, specially in big organizations like Amazon?12
-
What are your personal goto identity management providers?
I am currently looking at Firebase and Auth07 -
me vs my job at mnc laggard part 9/n . previous @ https://devrant.com/rants/6602068/...
====
I think i have now realised why working at corporate MNC sucks: they are reluctant to make a good product for their end users.
- they first come up with feature without a proper planning and research.
- then they are in a rush to release it to live audience by ignoring the possible issues that could arise
- when they see it fail, they are like, okay with that and blame it as a failed experiment
- instead of removing/disabling it, they are okay to keep it remain alive in the app, even if it causes customer inconveneience.
- meanwhile, they put false reports for their higher managers as a success and when an enhancement/modification comes for that feature from the higher up, they again start the loop by pushing a new feature without proper planning and a rush
as a dev, it fuckin kills me. I joined in the middle of one of these ugly loops. The app has a camera feature where the camera will generate voices to take pictures and record video , like "goto next car view" , "close the bonnet and focus", etc while the user follows instructions.
the ticket for me was to just add a flash button to this camera. But the more i dive into it, the more i hate it:
- the existing camera implementation provides api for toggling a camera flash, but when i attached it with a ui button, it would not work
- the existing implementation will send images /videos as direct payload data, resulting in generating very large payload curls . our app has a curl logger and it starts crashing.
- the existing implementation also crashes at uploading videos.
So where does it trouble me?well, I have a ticket to add just a fucking button, but i will have to replace the whole camera module and start from scratch. also the crash causing loggers will need some workarounds, otherwise i could not check the apis. and my manager will be like "why are you taking so long to add a flashlight?" and i would be like "coz i wanna put this flashlight up your -2 -
I am using materilize with react. Having one problem that when i goto to a navlink lets say to 1 and then goto navlink 2 and then come back to one i need to re run the jquery or Javascript so how can i do that?6
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