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Client : Can you make some adblock?
Me : Why? There is a lot of good things already...
C : I mean... Listen carefully.
M : ok
C: i have some google ads and user blocks with adblock
M : yeah, that is normal
C : so i implemented adblock blocker which blocks adblock so that i can show the webpage plus ads when the user disables adblock.
M : i bet users hate that.
C : yeah, so users found out a way to disable adblock blocker which disables adblock blocker which i implemented to show the ads! So i cant earn revenue..
M : so what?
C : Can you make ad block block block block?
M : Sure. How much will you give me ?
C : 20 to 30 dollars
M : great ( the most generous client ever seen)
*couple of years later*
Client : can you make ad block block block block block block block block block block?
Me : i cant understand
C : count the number of block
If there is odd number of block i means to block ads.
If there is even number of block ads, it means to show ads making user to disable ads.
M : so just tldr your request this time
C : even number
M : ok how much will you pay
C : 20 to 30 dollars
*next day*
C : can you..
M : offline
Who in the fucking world made ads, made adblock and made adblock block?17 -
Me: *types "recursion" into google*
Google: Did you mean: recursion
Me: *clicks the suggestion, even tho I see no error*
Google: Did you mean: recursion
Me: ohh I see. I feel stupid8 -
New Guy Day 2: He has deleted the git repo on the project he was assigned to 4 times, written a recursion formula that crashed a server, & knocked my coffee cup onto the floor.
I messaged my boss telling him I am going to hide the body in his trunk.8 -
My programming teacher is a freaking degenerate. He spend 7 months teaching us basic stuff like if-clauses, while-loops and stuff like that over and over again - everyone was annoyed but he didn't listen to us because "some people still don't get it". (The reason for this could be their total absence during lessons but who am I to tell.)
Beginning of 2018 he realised we hadn't much time left to prepare for our final exam so he tried self-taught learning. 8 sorting algorithms, recursion, how to write classes and objects in less than a week. And of course there was a classtest about this - needless to say that like nobody passed it. He still has no clue why we are "so lazy and dumb".
One of his favourite code examples is a calculator. I don't know how many i've programmed and they've gotten more and more ridiculous. (Who the hell would want interfaces like IComparer in a calculator?)
He even wanted to convince us that for-loops can't count down (and that things like "i--" doen't exist.)
I could go on and on about this guy and his craziness.27 -
The day I send myself about 76k mails
> be me
> be working on a rest api
> implement an error handler that would send me a mail with exception details
> use same error handler in mail send error handler
> Summoned the recursion devil by accident
> Test error handler
> Forgot port forwarding to SMTP server
> keep the debug session open
> throw new UnexpectedInterruptionException()
> get back to work
> Add the missing port forwarding rule to putty
> The error handler starts doing it's thing
> The handler chain starts to pop
> handler after handler executes
> PCFreeze.png
> WhatTheFuckIsGoingOn.gif
> VS finally accepts stop debugging
> PhoneVibrationSpam.mp3
> Peek into webmail
> WowFinallySomeFanMail
> Look into it
> Realizing what I have done
> Delete mailbox
> Remove recursion
> Wow that's how randy must have felt in southpark
> Feel weird
> Shutdown, go outside
> What's up anon?
> Nothing, really
9 -
I have to let it out. It's been brewing for years now.
Why does MySQL still exist?
Really, WHY?!
It was lousy as hell 8 years ago, and since then it hasn't changed one bit. Why do people use it?
First off, it doesn't conform to standards, allowing you to aggregate without explicitly grouping, in which case you get god knows what type of shit in there, and then everybody asks why the numbers are so weird.
Second... it's $(CURRENT_YEAR) for fucks sake! This is the time of large data sets and complex requirements from those data sets. Just an hour through SO will show you dozens of poor people trying to do with MySQL what MySQL just can't do because it's stupid.
Recursion? 4 lines in any other large RDBMS, and tough luck in MySQL. So what next? Are you supposed to use Lemograph alongside MySQL just because you don't know that PostgreSQL is free and super fast?
Window functions to mix rows and do neat stuff? Naaah, who the hell needs that, right? Who needs to find the products ordered by the customer with the biggest order anyway? Oh you need that actually? Well you should write 3-4 queries, nest them in an incredibly fucked up way, summon a demon and feed it the first menstrual blood of your virgin daughter.
There used to be some excuses in the past "but but but, shared hosting only has MySQL". Which was wrong by the way. This was true only for big hosting names, and for people who didn't bother searching for alternatives. And now it's even better, since VPS and PaaS solutions are now available at prices lower than shared hosting, which give you better speed, performance and stability than shared hosting ever did.
"But but but Wordpress uses MySQL" - well then kill it! There are other platforms out there, that aren't just outrageously horrible on the inside and outside. Wordpress is crap, and work on it pays crap. Learn Laravel, Symfony, Zend, or even Drupal. You'll be able to create much more value than those shitty Wordpress sites that nobody ever visits or pay money on.
"But but but my client wants some static pages presented beside their online shop" - so why use Wordpress then? Static pages are static pages. Whip up a basic MVC set-up in literally any framework out there, avoid MySQL, include a basic ACL package for that framework, create a controller where you add a CKEditor to edit page content, and stick a nice template from themeforest for that page and be done with that shit! Save the mock-up for later use if you do that stuff often. Or if you're lazy to even do that, then take up Drupal.
But sure, this is going a bit over the scope. I actually don't care where you insert content for your few pages. It can be a JSON file for all I care. But if I catch you doing an e-commerce solution, or anything else than just text storage, on MySQL, I'll literally start re-assessing your ability to think rationally.12 -
Aaaah...I just got back from a meeting because of a production data problem caused by an analyst who keeps making mistakes that screw up client data. I wrote a program to automate most of it and everybody initially accused me of having a buggy program, only to find out she wasn't using it, never did.
"Why aren't you using the program then?" was asked. "Oh, well, I just understand my way better," she replies, "When I make a mistake at least I understand why."
Pause....
"Then, um, if you know you're making a mistake, why don't you fix it?"
"Because my process is so manual and labor intensive sometimes it's not worth it to go back and fix it, because I'd have to do everything over again, and you guys are much better at fixing this stuff than I am."
I indicated that everyone is too busy to stop and fix her mistakes, to which she then asks:
"So if you can't fix my mistakes, what am I supposed to do?"7 -
I'm 20, and I consider myself to be as junior as they come. I only started programming seriously in June 2016,and since then, I've been doing mainly Android Work, and making my own servers and backends(using AWS/Firebase nd stuff).
For the first time in life, I was approached by a recruiter for a company on linkedIn. They "stumbled upon" my Github profile and wanted to see if I was interested in an internship opportunity. This company is an early stage start up, by that I mean a dude with an idea calling himself the CEO and a guy who "runs a tech blog" and only knows college level C programming (explaination follows).
So they want me to make the app for their startup. and for that, I ws first asked to solve a couple problems to prove my competence and a "technical interview" followed.
They gave me 3 questions, all textbook, GCD of 2 numbers, binary search and Adding an element to the linked List, code to be written on a piece of paper. As the position was that of an Android Developer, I assumed that Java should be the language of choice. Assumed because when I asked, the 'tech blogger' said, yeah whatever.
But wait, that ain't all, as soon as I was done, Mr. Blogger threw a fit, saying I shouldn't assume and that I must write it in C. I kept my cool (I'm not the most patient person), and wrote the whole thing in C.
He read it, and asked me what I've written and then told me how wrong I was to write 2 extra lines instead of recursion for GCD. I explained that with numbers large enough, we run the risk of getting a stackoverflow and it's best to apply non recursive solution if possible. He just heard stackoverflow and accused me of cheating. I should have left right then, but I don't know why, I apologized and again, in detail explained what was happening to this fucktard. Once this was done, He asked me how, if I had to, I'd use this exact code in my Android App. I told him that Id rather write this in Java/Kotlin since those are the languages native to Android apps. I also said that I'd export these as a Library and use JNI for the task. (I don't actually know how, I figured I can study if I have to).
Here's his reply, "WTF! We don't want to make the app in Java, we will use C (Yeh, not C++, C). and Don't use these fancy TOOLS like JNI or Kotlin in front of me, make a proper application."
By this I was clear that this guy is not fit to be technical lead and that I should leave. I said, "Sir, I don't know how, if even possible, can we make an Android App purely in C. I am sorry, but this job is not for me".
I got up and was about to leave the room, when we said, "Yeah okay, I was just testing you".
Yeah right, the guy's face looked like a howling monkey when I said Library for C, and It has been easier for me to explain code to my 10 year old cousin that this dumbfuck.
He then proceeded to ask me about my availability, and I said that I can at max to 15-20 hours a week since my college schedule is pretty tight. I asked me to get him a prototype in 2 months and also offered me a full time job after I graduate. (That'd be 2 years from now). I said thank you for the offer, but I am still not sure of I am the right person for this job.
He then said, "Oh you will be when I tell you your monthly stipend."
I stopped for a second, because, money.
And then he proceeded to say 2 words which made me walk out without saying a single word.
"One Thousand".
I live in India, 1000 INR translates to roughly $15. I made 25 times that by doing nothing more than add a web view to an activity and render a company's responsive website in it so it looks like an app.
If this wasn't enough, the recruiter later had the audacity to blame me for it and tell me how lucky I am to even get an offer "so good".
Fuck inexperienced assholes trying shit they don't understand and thinking that the other guy is shitsworth.10 -
Have you ever had a recursive meeting? A meeting about a meeting, about a meeting, about a meeting...9
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The exact moment when I understood what programming actually was.
I was getting hard times at my 3rd college grade, trying to implement the recursive sudoku solver in python. Teacher spent a lot of time trying to explain me things like referential transparency, recursion and returning the new value instead of modifying the old one and everything related. I just couldn't get it.
I was one of the least productive students, i couldn't even understand merge sort.
I was struggling with for loops and indexes, and then suddenly something clicked in my head, like someone flipped a switch, and i understood everything i was explained, all at once. It was like enlightenment, like pure magic.
I had sudoku solver implemented by the end of the lecture. Linked list, hash map, sets, social graphs, i got all of these implemented later, it wasn't a problem anymore. I later got an A for my diploma.
Thank you @dementiy, you were the reason for my career to blast off.7 -
Someone wrote a piece of code half a year ago. It's fuckin complex and recursive. And uncommented. Today it's my job to figure out WHY and HOW it works.
If it wasn't clear before, that someone who wrote it was me. I'm not sure if I was on some substances back then, but that shit is fast and I have no clue how I was able to create it. Perhaps it was the coffee overdose...
However, wish me luck figuring this thing out.6 -
Is it just me or does this shirt make no sense? If your coffee was empty, then it would return true and you would keep coding. If it was not empty you would fill it.
Plus it's not a while loop, so unless this is some sort of recursion you wouldn't keep going....
6 -
My own programming language (still WIP). I got SO excited when I found recursion worked, I even got the simplest factorial recursive function wrong. And then again, once arrays worked, bubble sort it was. I shit you not, once I saw all the numbers printed in order, I had to stand up and walk or I would have jumped out of the chair in excitement.
In case someone is interested, I use LLVM for the backend.4 -
There are two types of people in this world: those who understand recursion and those who don’t understand that there are two types of people in this world
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Yeah GDPR emails are annoying, but you know what's worse? People complaining about GDPR emails!
And you know what's worse than that?
People complaining about people complaining about GDPR emails
And you know what's worse than that?
...6 -
What happens when I open devRant:
0. Check my rant
1. Find my rant is still at 19 upvotes
2. Go and look at some other rants
3. Realise that you're procrastinating
4. Close devRant
5. Catch interesting rant whilst the app is closing
6. Open devRant1 -
Hey girl,
I want our relationship to be a poor recursion, so that it never terminates.
#devspickupline10 -
Just noticed on "winehq" that the acronym for "Wine" is "Wine Is Not an Emulator". This is great and all, but all my mind can think about is the infinite recursion problem they've got there.13
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The index to Sedgewick's Algorithms book says:
recursion, 35
see also base case,
see also recursion1 -
A lot of phrases we use in software would make awesome alternative-rock band names.
- Integer Overflow
- Curly Braces
- Recursion
- Callback Hell
- Daemon Processes
- Nested Loop
- Regular Expressions
Source: Twitter2 -
Was joking with my sister about who has more steps. She had done more steps so far, so I said that I would walk 20 times around the McDonald's, where we were going to eat. She replied that she would walk 50 times around it, so I said that I would walk 2 times more around it than she would. She then said, that she would go once more around it. In the end, I explained recursion and infinite loops to her. Her comment was "großer Blödsinn" (German) -> "big bullshit".4
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My younger sister has to write a story for her assignment and she isn't getting any ideas . So I suggested this :
A story about a kid who has to write a story but isn't getting any ideas ,so he writes a story about a kid who has to write a story but isn't getting any ideas ,so he writes a story about a kid who has to write a story but isn't getting any ideas... till 200 words.11 -
A dev team has been spending the past couple of weeks working on a 'generic rule engine' to validate a marketing process. The “Buy 5, get 10% off” kind of promotions.
The UI has all the great bits, drop-downs, various data lookups, etc etc..
What the dev is storing the database is the actual string representation FieldA=“Buy 5, get 10% off” that is “built” from the UI.
Might be OK, but now they want to apply that string to an actual order. Extract ‘5’, the word ‘Buy’ to apply to the purchase quantity rule, ‘10%’ and the word ‘off’ to subtract from the total.
Dev asked me:
Dev: “How can I use reflection to parse the string and determine what are integers, decimals, and percents?”
Me: “That sounds complicated. Why would you do that?”
Dev: “It’s only a string. Parsing it was easy. First we need to know how to extract numbers and be able to compare them.”
Me: “I’ve seen the data structures, wouldn’t it be easier to serialize the objects to JSON and store the string in the database? When you deserialize, you won’t have to parse or do any kind of reflection. You should try to keep the rule behavior as simple as possible. Developing your own tokenizer that relies on reflection and hoping the UI doesn’t change isn’t going to be reliable.”
Dev: “Tokens!...yea…tokens…that’s what we want. I’ll come up with a tokenizing algorithm that can utilize recursion and reflection to extract all the comparable data structures.”
Me: “Wow…uh…no, don’t do that. The UI already has to map the data, just make it easy on yourself and serialize that object. It’s like one line of code to serialize and deserialize.”
Dev: “I don’t know…sounds like magic. Using tokens seems like the more straightforward O-O approach. Thanks anyway.”
I probably getting too old to keep up with these kids, I have no idea what the frack he was talking about. Not sure if they are too smart or I’m too stupid/lazy. Either way, I keeping my name as far away from that project as possible.4 -
!rant
When I was in 8th grade and was learning to code (c++), I sincerely believed that calling a function within a function simply calls it again (like in a loop) . I had never heard of recursion.
And I actually made a small project in which I called a function again and again thinking that calling another terminates the previous one.
No wonder my program kept crashing. I have still kept that code with me as a wonderful memory.
I know this isn't particularly interesting, but I just saw that code today and felt like sharing this...3 -
Me: *spends 5 hours screwing around with recursion and performing operations in reverse order*
Unit tests: *pass*
Me: Wow. Okay, that’s interesting.
*run tests again*
Me: Right, well, that’s just dandy. Now, how did I get here and how do I document this...
TL;DR I spent 5 hours fucking about and accidentally came up with a working solution that I can’t explain
EDIT: RIP wrong category1 -
Crazy code.
You know when you come across some code, where you think: “I kinda see what you were going for, but it’s still hella dumb though...” right?
Currently doing some work on an F# backend, and the dev clearly knew enough of the language, but their code makes me question a lot.
The problem is simple: use a third party tool to generate images of each page in a pdf.
Said tool supports:
1. Querying the number of pages
2. Getting all pages as separate images in a single invocation
Can you guess how the dev solved it?
They’ve recursively incremented a page number, called the external tool to grab the image of that page.
“But how does it know when it’s run out of pages?” I hear you ask.
Simple. Catch the inevitable exception, and check against a hardcoded string literal to see whether it says “must be before the end of the document”.
I shit you not.
I nearly had an actual seizure when I was debugging some semi-related code and ended up in this wonderland of fuckery.
The recursion and pattern matching was flawless though, yet the tool’s website clearly states the supported functionality.
The whole thing feels like they tried to do it the right way, but couldn’t be bothered / couldn’t get it right, so they ended up creating this insane bit of madness.5 -
So I've got a recursive function that calls a recursive function that has a nested recursive function inside it.
2 -
Top 3 times:
1) When I amazed myself by solving a problem using recursion.
2) When I taught myself how to make my a restful api and consumed it using Ajax.
3) When I converted a psd in to a responsive pixel perfect webpage.
Writing code makes me feel I am worth something in this world.1 -
Trying to install .NET Framwork 3.5 and this message comes up *headdesk*
WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME, MICROSOFT!?
9 -
I had a coworker that was a real asshole. I noticed that often, during git merges, he removed part of the code I wrote.
So I had to spend a lot of time copying and pasting my code from git history in order to restore it.
I complained about that but he answered it happened by mistake. In reality that happened so often that he had to done it deliberately.
Btw, I did a little revenge. One day I discovered he didn't feel very comfortable using recursion. Thereafter, every time I needed a small loop I created a recursive function doing the same thing.
Fortunately, after some months I found a better job. I hope he is still debugging that code.4 -
5 more mins on devrant and I'll finish that project.
Starts project, *buzzz buzzz* new devrant notification. Oohh, I'll just check that notif. Okay, while I'm hear, better check some rants to get it out of my system. Just 5 more mins....1 -
I used to prefer, think, and code in loops rather recursion.
Now though somehow it's the other way around...
And I have to assure myself why a piece of code I wrote won't cause a Stack overflow... and that if I really had to I could convert it back to a loop.
Haven't done it though for a awhile tho...7 -
Don’t know that I’ve seen this posted here yet. Either way, the Google devs definitely have a sense of humor
-
Our boss demands us to implement machine learning to an obscure project.
So we use machine learning to find what to use machine learning for.5 -
Expectation: I'm going to make an app that would remind me to finish my side projects.
Reality: I'm going to make an app that would remind me to finish the app that would remind me to finish the app that would remind me to finish the...
*stack overflow*2 -
I remember when I was first learning recursion, i thought whoever thought of it must've been on some kickass drugs because it all sounded like sorcery. Just solved my first problem at work that recursion actually made simpler. Does that make me a wizard?10
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"Our company encourages cryptocurrency big data agile machine learning, empowerment diversity, celebrate wellness and synergy, unpack creative cloud real-time front-end bleeding edge cross-platform modular success-driven development of digital signage, powered by an unparalleled REST API backend, driven by a neural network tail recursion AI on our cloud based big data linux servers which output real time data to our Wordpress template interactive dynamic website TypeScript applet, with deep learning tensor flow capabilities.
Don't get what the fuck I just said? Udemy offers countless courses on python based buzzwords. Be the first out of 13 people to sell your soul and private information, and you'll get the first three minutes of the course free!"3 -
Felt like a real badass in middle school when I made my first .bat script that would recursively open itself. Took only two words. Four if you wanted exponential recursion rather than linear. And I came up with it by myself.
Cheesiest thing ever, but I really loved freaking people out by opening it and just watch windows grind to a halt as it would run out of ram opening thousands of terminal windows. Hell, it still gives me a kick today when I show it to people the first time :D7 -
Got stucked in a problem with recursion in php, almost 2 days no sign of progress until i told my co worker how my code works, then i found the error and it work. I think developers need to talk about the code to realize whats wrong with the code.9
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HR Interviewer: Where do you see yourself in 5 years?
Interviewee: I have your job and I'm asking the interviewee: "Where do you see yourself in 5 years?" His response?
I have your job and I'm asking the interviewee: "Where do you see yourself in 5 years?" His response... -
I'm absolutely loving the fact that my university is making me take their intro to programming course this fall when I've taken 5 programming classes in high school and already have intro to programming credits from a different university. Did I mention that I passed the AP Computer Science exam before taking even more courses? Do they not understand that I do in fact understand how to use recursion(the most advanced topic in their intro course) and don't need to spend a semester relearning what I already know? For Christ's sake they don't even get into OOP in that course.3
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That feeling when recursion finally "clicks", and you begin instantly identifying candidates in your code for recursive solutions.20
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Despite common sense, I think technology is not making our lives easier. It's just build chaos on top of chaos.
Take server-side programming for instance.
First you have to find someone to host your thing, or a PaaS provider. Then you have to figure out how much RAM and storage you need, which OS you're going to use. And then there's Docker (which will run on top of a VM on AWS or GCP anyway, making even less sense). And then there's the server technology: nginx, Apache (and many many more; if, that is, you're using a server at all). And then there are firewalls, proxies, SSL. And then you go back to the start, because you have to check if your hosting provider will support the OS or Docker or your server. (I smell infinite recursion here.)
Each of these moving parts come with their own can of worms in terms of configuration and security. A whole bible to read if you want to have the slightest clue about what you're doing.
And then there's the programming language to use and its accompanying frameworks. Can they replace the server technology? Should you? Will they conflict with each other and open yet another backdoor into your system? Is it supported by your hosting provider? (Did I mention an infinite recursion somewhere?)
And then there's the database. Does it have a port to the language/framework of your choosing? Why does it expose an web interface? Is it supposed to replace your server? And why are its security features optional again? (Just so I have to test both the insecure and the secure environments?)
And you haven't written a single line of code yet, mind you.4 -
Me after using Prolog for 6 hours because of University...
Sometimes prolog gives me brainfuck (pun intended)
3 -
Was wondering why my callback wouldn't run when I intended.
> console.log each iteration
> realizes it skips the goal and goes up one
> decided to cheat use greater than instead
> ACCIDENTAL RECURSION
> Oh, there's the problem
> Thinks about going to bed for the night
9 -
What happens if i rant a rant that everyone knows?
"A different error message! Finally some progress!" -
Programming contest assignments, first level:
1. "...if you don't know how to return values from a function, you can just print them"
2. "...if you don't know how to read files, you can assume data is in global variables"
3. Required recursion
4. "...and estimate its time complexity.", "You may pre-process the data, but use at most o(n^3)", "your algorithm must use under n^3 operations"
That escalated quickly!2 -
0. The conference room TV has no sound.
1. I submit ticket to Facilities.
10. Facilities closes ticket saying that's up to Service Desk.
11. I submit ticket to Service Desk
100. Service Desk closes ticket saying that up to Facilities
110. ???
111. Profit2 -
when you read an awesome @practiseSafeHex rant and share it on Slack
OMFG WHAT-THE-ACTUAL-F
this is soooo fucking broken, my eyes now have many relations to periods
shit... @DevRant fix dat...
4 -
Today I wrote the most epic code.
The kind that breaks your brain, but when you're done with it you know it's time to go home and kick back coz you've done good.
It used recursion, did backflips to avoid unnecessary db calls, featured no code repitition. Hell I even commented the business rules it was following in there to explain what was happening.
I hope it works tomorrow when I test it 😂😂😂6 -
The only thing I studied from HTML is that you have to close anything you have opened.../>
I already had some experience with C++ and suddenly they suggested me to take a mentoring.
My mentor - Well, we're going to learn HTML.
- I'm busy. I'm learning python...
- What have you done? Did you learn the HTML?
- Eeh I need to do a neutral network project for the uni. Wait please...
- It's time to learn HTML.
- Eeh I have a deadline in these days. I have to make an Ethereum smart contract. Wait please...
- HTML!
- WAIT!
Finally I asked my mentor to stop this fucking recursion. I'm not going to learn it.
1 -
one thing I don't get from Kubernetes
if a group of containers are called pods, and pods are containers, and containers in Kubernetes are also inside containers, therefore, its a clusterfuck of containers?1 -
Sometimes I start writing a sentence that ends with parentheses (only to realize what I put in the parentheses is as important as the rest, then I could use a regular comma instead).
I call this "grammatical tail-call recursion".2 -
had an incredibly productive day today on the ultradark blockchain. wrote a bunch of tests, updated documentation, split the repo into 3 seperate ones because it got too big and had too many different things in it, AND accidentally fixed an annoying, deep-recursion bug that ive noticed for a while now.
seems too good to be true...1 -
Hey Guys!
@alexdovzhanyn and I just released the third episode of Runtimerror Live!
We talk about various things like the DynDDoS attack, recursion and much more.
https://runtimerror.com/podcast/...
We hope you enjoy it as much as we enjoyed recording it :)1 -
I don't really get why the word inception is used as a synonym for recursion.
Inception is about injecting a tought in someone else's mind.
... or is that just me? ...2 -
Couldn't find any satisfactory explanation online, so here is a question. Discussions idea etc are welcome.
How is the colour fill tool implemented in paint or other software?
I remember it running superfast on old 98 machines. Got me curious to think how they achieved it.
(correct me if I am wrong, recursion won't be a good idea for large images.)4 -
I just watched a video where a guy used a homemade band saw made of wood to make another homemade band saw made of wood. This is the very definition of recursion, amirite?3
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When I first met the Logo turtle I was hooked. Then learned Pascal. Saw recursion and my brain exploded. 23 years and still love it every day 🐢
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Week 1 day 3 and 4.
I didn't feel like I did a whole lot yesterday so I just pushed it into today. In the past I tried to program for hours everyday and expect to keep up my stamina for it but it didn't work so this time I'll just take days off every now and then and see if that works at all. Yesterday was one of those, the only thing I did was watch some videos on OOP and practice some more with OOP and recursion.
As far as today goes I started sketching our the ideas for my own personal app I hope to develop once I get the skill set. I tried to focus on looking at it not just from the perspective of a developer but also a user and a marketer to see vialibity and such but I have a LONG time to go before I can get my idea rolling. I decided to push starting the actual course until tomorrow because Ina small questionnaire before you go into it it asks if you're familliar with threading and networking, which I am not. So that was my main focus today, expanding my base Java skill set. If any Android Devs can give from their experience want I need to know I would love that but other than that I feel pretty good about what I did today. -
My university had a Programming Fundamentals course in the first semester and we got assigned this grumpy lady who demanded respect and would always claim she was the best at programming among her colleagues, had an obnoxiously snobbish tone and had a habit of forcing unneeded nonsensical sarcasm everytime one of us stepped up to ask her a question.
She taught C++ and I'm not saying she didn't know her stuff or anything; I respected her regardless (because she was my teacher), but she would mix up C classes in and insist that that was the right way to do it and had no consistent programming style.
Once she got so fed up with our class that just to prove her point that we're all dumb and worthless (she hated us a lot, yeah) that she started explaining binary trees and recursion out of the blue and gave us assignments for them... even though they weren't going to be covered that week. It soon became a shitfest, to be honest.
But on the plus side, because I didn't wanna listen to her lectures I pulled two all-nighters and covered the semester's worth of C++ and started napping in a corner in her class. She never had personal beef with me so I was thankful for that but her being the way she was helped me learn C++ with more motivation and vigor than I normally would have and also let me earn some change because my classmates couldn't understand her classes and wanted me to explain whatever she covered. -
Creating side projects for the side projects which are supposed to make the coding of side projects who are supposed to speed up coding on main project. Ends up in sideprojectception...3
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Possibly my favourite function is Clojure's "recur", which isn't really a function at all, but a special form that gives you a guaranteed tail-position call to the current function.
Basically what that means is you can write recursive functions (functions that call themselves) and know that you're not creating a potential stack overflow.
Um. Okay, I can feel people looking at me like 🤔 Basically what *that* means is: normally when a function calls another function, a "stack frame" is allocated, holding all the local variables for that call. If a function calls itself 1000 times, 1000 stack frames get allocated. "Tail call optimisation" is a process by which if you call yourself as the very last thing in a function, the language doesn't need to remember the current frame; it just has to pass the return value upwards. The trouble is, it's sometimes hard to notice that you've turned a tail-call optimisable function into a non-optimisable one. Clojure's recur keyword makes it explicit, and therefore safe: if you try to do anything with the return value of recur, it's an error.
PS I'm sure another language did explicit TCR first, but Clojure is where I first saw it.6 -
I regret ever picking my CS major every time I stare at my VS Debugger and am stuck reading the values stored in a List<Int>. Why, List<Int>, as the backing for my shortest path, do you not have the proper values after I walk my tree.
I have lovingly set up my Priority Queue. I have followed the class notes and lectures.
Oh why, my List, have your forsaken me?
Oh.
It's a recursion bug. I'm not updating nodes properly.
I'm a dumb ass.2 -
It is Saturday 19:30 and I am spending my time writing functions for save/load data in a binary tree. Recursion and fscanf are not a good combo so far, but that is the task. When the code is done I have to get some math done.
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Spending days on a recursion problem and never solving it. That was a low time for me-especially when I looked at how short and elegant the solution was online. I've recovered now and have gotten better at it, but damn that's one thing I need master or it'll haunt me to I die.1
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*me to myself* okay this time I'm not solving that problem with recursion. The assignment is hard enough already.
*A ton of sweat, blood and hours later* Whoops. -
they say i was a natural at programming. i like it, i understand problems easily and im able to find a solution for it. but so was math, and chemistry. basically anything that has problem solving so i wasn't into programming that much.
until i joined my first competition. man that was an eye opener. we had a deadlock tie with the other team, and there was this one problem that was a tie breaker. sure enough we both was able to solve it. but the judges ruled in our favor because of one thing, i used recursion! man that was fun. the looks on their faces.
and i was hooked on that euphoric feeling. that was my drug. now , a decade or so later, im still addicted to that drug -
function stressBall(previousPost){
post = makePostAboutWinningStressBall(previousPost);
return stressBall (post);
}2 -
self refrencing tables awesome concept but it pisses me off that mysql doesnt support "select with" query i had to think about writing recusive functions that builds a tree of n level i must say im kinda proud :p
2 -
It was one of those "I need more coffee days"..
I was writing some checking function called "check" (now to clarify my company is not coding oop style so no classes etc.) And as I went on I included another file for some functions and what not. Pretty normal stuff right? Right. In that file I required there also was a function called "check".
Guess who tried to use the "check" function of the imported file in the "check" function?! Right! A Fucking genius aka. me!!
So I tried to figure out why the page wouldn't load and why the server was starting to lag more and more.
After killing all the apache tasks three times i finally realized what I did.
Took me 10 minutes to figure out that i was causing endless recursion. That day wasn't my best and clearly not filled with enough coffee.
PS: yes I know oop would have probably eliminated the possibility for this but I'm just adapting to the coding style of my company as I can't really change things since I'm just an intern.1 -
"String reverse with recursion" - I know it's a small thing for seasoned coders but back when I was starting It opened tons of possibilities.
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I just found this in the code I'm working on:
function checkDateValidity() {
function checkDateValidity() {
...
}
}
Obviously a bad copy/paste. Not even sure how it was working before; it probably wasn't.1 -
An old sysadmin configured the idrac interface of a company VMware server to get the IP address trough DHCP. Of course, without a valid IP, the server doesn't start. For you, where was hosted the VM with the DHCP server?1
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Me: *watches programming video on Y-Combinator*
Also Me: "why the heck are they talking about recursion and not funding startups?"2 -
Yeah it's just me.
*when your recursion function suddenly worked and you still can't figure out why it worked...*
Guess I need to improve on my algorithms more. Just can't wrap my head around even a quite simple recursion. I'm certain this won't last long. -
val true : bool = isFrustrated(me : Human)
1) Honestly fuck SML. Who's goddamn idea was it to make a useless fucking programming language that does absolutely nothing relevant unless you're trying to learn recursion. Who's fucking idea was it to not be able to even have side effects. And who gives a shit if you can explicitly declare the type of variables on every single fucking line that's what comments are for if you really need it. All this is aside from the fact that nobody ever has been like "OH UNMUTABLE TYPES? WOW IM SO HAPPY THIS IS SO USEFUL". At this point I feel like SML is basically a DFA - ABSOLUTELY FUCKING USELESS
2) Aside from that, who's idea was it to duplicate two classes. There's 15-122 (Principles of Imperative Computation) and 15-150 (Principles of Functional Programming). So far the ONLY fucking thing different is we learned about work and span in 15-150 - OTHER THAN THAT ITS LIKE TAKING THE EXACT SAME COURSE. BUT AGAIN. So then I have to fucking sit in lecture and pay attention for that tiny bit of information that is new amongst the giant cesspool of information that isn't. BECAUSE I ALREADY LEARNED IT.
Oh and did I mention that both classes are required to graduate as a CS major? Fuck me.
Thanks devRant for helping <3
Edit: We are 4 weeks into the semester so you'd expect we'd have gotten into the new stuff by now right????5 -
We are dependent on dependency injection and package management... which also comes with a lot of dependencies installed by another package manager1
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Imagine you have a dream about dreaming about unfinished code that triggers recursion, because it is unfinished and that is why you are dreaming about it.
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Sometime I feel, god forget to write proper toggle command for me.
For others it is random, for me it is static. One sad life. Only hope is system run out of memory because it is recursion with no ending.
here is the dev-rant
After fucking with Laravel Passport for 3 days, I finally manage to find a way to do multi auth.
Yeah! dude I am the guy who is going to write a tutorial for that. So, you must -- this rant.1 -
Recursion: Good or bad? I mean, it's very few lines, efficient and pretty but can be so damn hard for others to read and debug.3
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Seems like latex does not like recursion. Defined a command as itseld by accident and got lots of strange error. Will there be a time where i can accept that copy-pasting code only generates problem?
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Apparently my superpower is writing exponential time algorithms to solve puzzles and games. If you need someone to write a recursive DFS to solve your shitty word search, hit me up.
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well... Fuck you ackermann and your damn interesting function!
Spent three hours searching for an error in rasoning but well... Who'd have guessed...
FUCK! I need to get my stuff done... Fuck!
Not entirely sure if should be said an IT company but yes I would mention SHAREit.
The well known file sharin... [read more]