I hate front-end and CSS

I fucking hate Internet of Things, I think that it's a ridiculous idea to connect things, that work perfectly fine, to the internet.
The 'convenience' you get is minimalistic and most of the time non existent.
It is also often insanely insecure and expensive. The burdans it brings with it most of the time just outweigh the positive sides of it.

Now today happened something that made me hate it even more. Today was the First Lego Lego (Lego competition with ev3 robots, etc.) and one part of the tournament is to find a solution for a given problem. This year the general topic was hydro-dynamics and so the problem was how you can reduce water usage and 'save' water.

Our idea was to make reusable coffee cups and give them to the local coffee shops. One time use paper cups use take around 400ml water when produced) Basically you buy a cup once for 5 bucks and you get your coffee served in it. After drinking the coffee you return the cup to a local cafe and get a chip as pawn. When you buy your next coffee, you give them your chip and get it served in another reusable cup. The are at the moment already around 1000 cups going around the city.

Now this was our idea and we got ranked third. I am not too mad about our rank but what really drives me fucking mad is the team who ranked first.

Their idea was to make a pump (using an arduino) and a humidity sensor which you stick into a plant and the pump pumps water when the plant is too dry.
However (you probably guessed it already) they went a step further and connected it to the internet. They also made a web 'interface' for it so you can control the pump with your smartphone / computer / smartwatch / tv / whatever the fuck is connected to the internet nowadays 'thanks' to the iot 'revolution'.

So it is a pump that waters your plant when it is too dry BUT it is also connected to the internet.

WHY THE FUCK DOES THIS HAVE TO BE CONNECTED TO THE INTERNET.

"Oh look it is connected to the internet, wow awesome, oh it is also 'smart'. oh cooool. Nice I don't have to water my plants anymore"

A funny thing is that one of my friends built basically the same thing without connecting it to the internet. He built a small box with a pump and a humidity sensor that measures if the dirt is too dry and then waters the plant. It checks every few hours and the also is a small 16x2 LCD and a knob that you can turn to control how much water it should give the plant each time it waters it. He built it and I programmed it for him. Works perfectly fine and I don't see any reason why there should be any need to connect something like this to the internet.

Anyway we got ranked third, they first. I guess we should connect our coffee cups to the internet in some way ...

Someone please downvote me and send a pic of 6969!

PLEASE

My morning bowl of serial 😂😂

I have an array of 1037 records. The soap service only accepts 100 at a time. So, I write code to send an array of 100 records at a time to the soap service in a loop and get a response back of, "The maximum number (100) of records allowed for this operation has been exceeded." Well, I'll try 99 records then. Nope same error. I'll try 50 records, nope I'll just bang my head on the desk now since the documentation and error say it is a record limit of 100. 😠

Look at my code again. I was grabbing 100 records out of the array of 1037 records and storing it in a new array, but I was sending the original array with 1037 records instead of the temporary array in the loop. 😢 I'm going to bed.

Today in class a couple of people near me wanted to show me something.

Person: Check out this zero-day exploit! I hacked into the system using a cloud-based cryptographically secure MD5 hash finite automata firewall HTML code API!

Me: Erm...what exactly did you hack?

Person: *shows screen while smirking*

It was a shell simulator website running “ping https://google.com”

A group of Security researchers has officially fucked hardware-level Intel botnet officially branded as "Intel Management Engine" they did so by gathering it all the autism they were able to get from StackOverflow mods... though they officially call it a Buffer Overflow.
On Wednesday, in a presentation at Black Hat Europe, Positive Technologies security researchers Mark Ermolov and Maxim Goryachy plan to explain the firmware flaws they found in Intel Management Engine 11, along with a warning that vendor patches for the vulnerability may not be enough.

Two weeks ago, the pair received thanks from Intel for working with the company to disclose the bugs responsibility. At the time, Chipzilla published 10 vulnerability notices affecting its Management Engine (ME), Server Platform Services (SPS), and Trusted Execution Engine (TXE).

The Intel Management Engine, which resides in the Platform Controller Hub, is a coprocessor that powers the company's vPro administrative features across a variety of chip families. It has its own OS, MINIX 3, a Unix-like operating system that runs at a level below the kernel of the device's main operating system.

It's a computer designed to monitor your computer. In that position, it has access to most of the processes and data on the main CPU. For admins, it can be useful for managing fleets of PCs; it's equally appealing to hackers for what Positive Technologies has dubbed "God mode."

The flaws cited by Intel could let an attacker run arbitrary code on affected hardware that wouldn't be visible to the user or the main operating system. Fears of such an attack led Chipzilla to implement an off switch, to comply with the NSA-developed IT security program called HAP.

But having identified this switch earlier this year, Ermolov and Goryachy contend it fails to protect against the bugs identified in three of the ten disclosures: CVE-2017-5705, CVE-2017-5706, and CVE-2017-5707.

The duo say they found a locally exploitable stack buffer overflow that allows the execution of unsigned code on any device with Intel ME 11, even if the device is turned off or protected by security software.

For more of the complete story go here:
https://blackhat.com/eu-17/...
https://theregister.co.uk/2017/12/...

I post mostly daily news, commentaries and such on my site for anyone that wish to drop by there

Best userstory ever?

As CEO i want to small layout changes

For fucks sake I'm getting tired of this company. We have an app that's been developed on a VERY tight budget with a team and it's nearly completed/basically done few fixes here and there. They keep going to meetings with clients and promising more than the fucking app does! BITCH IT TOOK 6 MONTHS OF DEV TIME IF YOU WANTED THOSE OTHER FEATURES WHY DIDN'T YOU PUT IT IN THERE SOME FUCKING TIME.

And now since I'm in charge of the remnants of whats left, they keep asking me to make demos of ridiculous new features to show to new clients. BUT THATS NOT WHAT THE FUCKING UP DOES AND WERE OUT OF BUDGET!!!

I explain this. Every fucking day. I'm told they understand. Then I'm asked to make a fucking glittery demo with some bullshit features we don't have YET FUCKING AGAIN. BITCH I WILL QUIT THIS SHIT!

IF I SPEND ALL MY TIME MAKING THE FUCKING DEMOS, I CANT FINISH THE MAIN APP YOU FUCKTARDS. STOP PROMISING SHIT WE DONT HAVE!

Jetbrains IDEs be like

This made me laugh hard

Found this somewhere, not only for concept, i just do it everytime 😂

A programmer is a magical creature that turns honey into code.

Don't judge me, I'm a teddy bear 🍯 🐻

The second one got me

Few weeks ago I was having a few beers and messing around with a Minimax AI that could be used for different games as long as you fed it possible moves and win/loose-conditions. Could be used for like Tic Tac Toe on a 5x5 field, connect four etc.

I hadn't got it to work yet as I tried to implement alpha-beta pruning to optimize it. When I was playing against it I thought "Damn you're stupid, why would you even make that move" but still finished the game.

Before I knew it I had fucking lost. It outplayed me like 6 moves before I even knew what was happening.

And that's one of the top coolest feelings I've had as a developer, got destroyed by my own program.

Got an idea that needed prototyping, remembered that people always said Bootstrap is a good UI framework for quick prototyping. Had a doubt though, as the last time I checked Bootstrap sucks.

I ended up wasting hours to make it work with webpack. Turned out it still sucks.

The most irritating thing was they tell people to install the latest beta, or even alpha version on their website, not the stable one. Who the fuck would do that?

When you do the bare `npm install bootstrap`, it will install the latest stable version, but the docs page defaults to the... guess what, the latest beta version. I wasted nearly an hour just to figure out why the styles weren't working like the examples in the docs.

So my friend and I wrote a fully functioning dialect of Brainfuck. The twist? Every command is an emoji.
http://emotifuck.rs/

Double tapping on a rant little slowly opens the rant activity twice.
Happens when I try to ++ a rant by double tapping. @dfox

I really need to “import sleep from time”...

Real life programmer

alias wow="git status"
alias such="git"
alias very="git"

Result:

$ wow
$ such commit
$ very push

A few days ago while browsing devRant, my girlfriend stopped me at this one post and asked why does this person have a rubber duck. I went on to explain her about Rubber Duck Debugging. She was totally amazed by the concept (she's not a techie). Today suddenly a package arrived at my door step from her.

Well now I have an entire family of rubber ducks to code with :D