Details
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SkillsJS/Node/PHP/C
Joined devRant on 6/13/2016
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Just want to recommend the DevRant stress ball. I wasn't quite sure how to use it (it doesn't come with instructions) but since stuffing mine down the PM's throat my stress level has reduced dramatically.4
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Open office plans are a GREAT idea. Nothing says productivity like hearing a pin drop from across the building. Who needs good acoustics anyways? And you bet your ass the moment anything sensitive to background noise is going on you're no longer allowed to communicate at all, because even a potato plugged into an audio jack can hear you whisper from 50 feet away. Good thing we don't do that often - only on days that end in Y, I assume.2
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A few years ago when I was still an apple fan boy, friend of mine bragging me about how android is awesome, we were drinking some shots at our local pub and I was starting to get light headed. At one point he showed me so called "terminal emulator" app. I checked it out, and assumed it's an emulation, just like dosbox, so I decided to verify that "rm -rf *"... (the phone was rooted)
The phone shutdown within seconds, I couldn't stop laughing, while my friend was shock that his new phone was longer booting.
Luckily he managed to reflash the ROM. What can I learn from that experience?
1. Don't drink and sudo
2. Don't call your app an emulator if it's the real deal.34 -
Just for fun I am making an RPG Maker game called "IT Quest" where you go on a 40 hour long quest just to get the security team to modify a user. The game will feature tons of mandatory side quests and a convoluted plot that requires descending into the depths of the server room to find a virgin followed by a sacrificial ritual over the broken fax machine. And ultimately the security team just closes your request without telling you why and you have to fight the final boss of the game, Zeromus who runs security. When you defeat him you get the golden CAT5 cable of time which you beat the person who closed your request with until he reopens it and does his damned job.12
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I just love it when my coworkers talk (troll) about Google Ultron like it's the answer for everything in front of a new dev and he's getting more and more confused thinking "what's this awesome Google product I've never heard about"
And we just know that within the next 30 minutes he will have tears in his eyes of laughing after reading the story and probably also has it 'installed' (like some other devs) on his desktop (http://imgur.com/gallery/W9Pnh)
Have a good chuckle if you haven't read it before:
http://imgur.com/gallery/iJD8f
http://imgur.com/a/AOz0d
Don't forget to download your adobe reader guys.7 -
Favorite co-worker conversations:
Guy 1: PHP can be plenty fast! Just put in APC, Memcached, and Varnish and you can handle just about any load.
Guy 2: So you're saying PHP is fast when it doesn't run.1 -
Wearing devRant tee today! Entire train car was looking at me like wtf is devRant 🙄 And then I met my manager in elevator 🙊8
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When you start reading someone else's code and all you do is properly indent for the first 30 mins so you can actually read it.15