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Search - "this"
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Frontend-developer's day is like:
*moving element by 0.0001px to right*:
- *10 new pages appeared*
- *text suddenly disappeared*
- *pictures pierced bottom of page*
- *window.alert("Kill me")*
- *it's night outside the window, but you totally sure a minute ago was a noon*
*moving element back*:
- *no pictures*
- *no text*
- *no moon*
- *10 blank pages*
- *only darkness left in this world...
...and this fcking element, yeah*20 -
After months of agonizing work I found out my team mate deleted my code cause they thought it was useless. Then they come back and ask if I KNOW WHERE THE BUG IS. I now realize how true this is.3
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Today my manager told me she would get us phpstorm amongst other things If I requested them.
Sometimes I really want to hug this woman.
Awww yii phpstorm rules20 -
Can we please stop with this shit... its seriously annoying...
Like "master" and "slave" are literally the perfect terminology to explain what is being described... please leave ideology at home...11 -
So I had a job interview and got offered the job on the spot, then I went back to my manager at my current workplace to raise an issue about me being underpaid for this months wages and this is how the conversation went.
Enjoy.20 -
Things I learned this month.
1. Do not reference your solution as a hack. As in "I can make a hack to get around that" management actually views the solution as bad. But present the same solution with "I have this idea to get around that" then they love it and think you're great.
2. Management has no idea the difference between ML and if/else statements. If you can mimick ML with if/else then do it. Takes a lot less time and resources.
3. Don't enter a video meeting in just your skivvies, management views this as bad and HR will release a bunch of work-from-home policies in retaliation.
4. When explaining things to management don't try to explain the technical stuff. Is a waste of time and breath. All they really want to know is when you will be done. They don't care the difficulty level of the code involved.
I'm sure next month I'll learn more things.10 -
!dev
Just found out my house's heating system relies on this. A button, being held down by a bolt held by a zip tie. Who in their right mind looked at this, was like "this is fine" and left it there.
My dad, apparently.11 -
I work at a small retail store and we have quite a few regular customers who know I'm studying computer science because I'm always coding at work on my laptop.
One lady who comes in quite often and is very sweet asked me if I would take a look at her phone. She said she bought it and paid the owner of a phone repair store to set it up for her, but was felt like he did something weird to it. I told her I wasn't an expert but would look at it.
Oh my god. This guy set up her phone connected to his own personal icloud account. All of his music was on there. All of his contacts were on there. All of his pictures were on there. Even nude pictures of multiple people that this lady said she definitely does not know. I tell her this is very very wrong and no one in their right mind should've set her phone up this way.
I automatically think to factory reset. I'm unfamiliar with iPhone, as the last time I used one was an iPhone4 many years ago. I was unaware that apple applies an authentication lock when the phone is reset.
The authentication is set up underneath yet ANOTHER email address that belongs to this guy, as this lady promised me she has no knowledge of any email address similar to the one listed, nor does she have access to it.
I tell her to call the guy and ask for her money back and to unlock her phone so that she can reset it herself.
He claims that he cannot accept refunds if a factory reset has been performed.
Uhm, I am calling SOOOOO much bullshit. There should be absolutely no reason why the owner of the phone cannot factory reset it. The owner should be able to do ANYTHING she wants with it, without being locked out of it because some creep at a repair store did NOT DO HIS JOB CORRECTLY AND HE KNOWS IT. Why else would he claim he can't refund if it's been reset, because he KNOWS she got locked out.
So long story short I talked on the phone with him and cussed him out telling him he was wrong for taking advantage of someone who doesn't know much about technology and that he was invading privacy and violating her security and that i would report him if he didn't fully refund her and unlock her phone.
He gave her all of her money back, unlocked the phone (which she is deciding to sell because she got so scared by this), and I'm still filing a complaint against this man and his store. Who knows how many more clueless people he did this too. Fucking scumbag.10 -
drunk me: "let's just code a bit right before going to bed!"
*codes and then goes to bed*
sober me: "when and what did i do here?"
(...)
also sober me: "how the hell does this work?!"9 -
Fuck this guy who calls himself a fullstack developer after doing a HelloWorld with Node.js and a bit of flex box.
No. Really. Stop with this bullshit.5 -
It's my first day here and I LOVE this place. Everyone is so awesome and helpful and smart! Thanks for making me feel at home! <311
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This is what I have to deal with right now... 🙂🔫
Why?
Why would you not comment or name your variables so someone else can understand wtf is going on here?
Why!?16 -
"Do you like your job? I mean, all those collored lines in that funny font... sitting at the desk with this adorable rubber duck... Do you guys jus".....
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Me: "SHUT UP YOU STUPID ASSHOLE!!! I MADE 26 COMMITS DURING THIS FUCKING DAY, THE DAY THAT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE LAST WORKING DAY OF THIS SHITTY YEAR! I HAVE NOT SLEPT AS I SHOULD AT ALL CAUSE THIS FUCKING MIGRATION OF NEW YEAR'S UPDATE AND NOW... AHH NOW YOU STUPID FYCKING PSYCHO... NOW I HAVE TO CONTROLL MYSELF DURING NEXT DINNER WITH FRIENDS, HAVE NO MUCH ALCOHOL CAUSE DURING SUNDAY, EVEN ITS A FUCKING HOLIDAY AND EVEN IF I AM IN A LOOONNGG HANGOVER, I DO STILL NEED TO COMPLETE THIS FUCKING NEW YEAR MIGRATION YOU ASS PUNK! GO FUCK YOURSELF YOU LITLE USELESS TINY LITLE SHIT!!!"
And this is how I see my new years resolution: the time is priceles doing this questions to me...
Happy new year, fellazz! 💃🎆🎉2 -
So there it fucking goes.
Hi. I'm WillibertXXIV.
I'm not a programmer by trade; I have a more than fulltime job as a cook. As for the last year, I spent pretty much all my free time, overlapping my sleep time, to learn how to code.
All that so I can create a game that I started working on the same day I started my learning process. So far it's shit and it's going to stay that way for a long time. Only I can say this. It's my baby. It's fucking ugly and shit but it's mine.
Yesterday I broke it. I broke my baby. I don't know how it fucking happe. When I went to sleep I had a steady 175fps, nice realtime lightning and player / enemy that flowed like running water. I worked really hard to make that happened. Profiling, writing better code, profiling, etc. It's still not good, it's less shit.
I woke up, beautiful day. Not too warm, not too cold, that sweet spot right in the middle. Girlfriend already made the coffee. Perfect. Woke up, sat down to start my morning time work before going to my realjob and
BAM
Everything is shit, 20fps max. That one thing, gfx.waitforpresent, showing up in the profiler eating everything as the game run. Movements are now of stroboscopic nature. Light is still ok but what good does it do now fucking piece of shit. I'm not qualified enough for this shit.
Fuck,
Fuck this,
Fuck this shit,
Fuck this shit i'm out of here.26 -
So today , a company phoned me for a job I applied in Jobstreet. So the conversation goes like this.
Com " Do you have any experience in Android studio? "
Me : " Yes . I develop android application, it is compulsory to know actually."
Com :" ok... Do you have experience android SDK?"
Me : " I believe you are referring to the Android studio, yes."
Com :" do you have experience in Android programming"?
Me :" Yes. I do android application for both native and hybrid. As for hybrid, I use flutter."
Com :" Ok...but I was asking about android."
Me :*explaining what I just said *
Com: " you no understand! We need android programmer! Not native or flutter programmer!"
Me *explaining what native and hybrid is (in simple terms)
Com : " it is ok then.. our company prefer those who can develop android app , not native programmer or anything flutter programmer.
"
(Btw , I transcript how exactly that person talk to me)
My question to this person is.... WHAT THE F*** IS THIS? WANT AN ANDROID DEVELOPER BUT NOT NATIVE OR "FLUTTER"? WHAT THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN MEAN ? IF ANDROID IS NOT WRITTEN IN NATIVE OR HYBRID THEN WHAT YOU EXPECT ME TO USE THEN? USING ASSEMBLY X64?14 -
To all dutch people on here, the new surveillance law I ranted about a month or something ago has passed if my source is correct.
Passed as in, the government has voted in favor.
Time to start encrypting/vpn'ing/torring and securing your computers!
Feel free to use this rant's comment section as Q/A and tips section for this subject as well :)40 -
Suck dicks Microsoft... Get choked.
All I wanted to do was to uninstall this piece of crapware.
And now you're telling me i need to UPDATE the installer in order to uninstall.
What the fuck, what obscure substances have you been smoking lately? imbicile numbskull maniacs.19 -
The man who runs my IT department. The man who is in charge of all things and people that are technical: IT management software development, infrastructure, training, help desk, system administration, etc. A man with a staff of fifty plus. If you were to peel back the flesh on this man's head and crack open his skull you would find dung beetles feasting on the feces that power his thoughts and motor functions. Underneath this foul membrane, if you could push past the maggots; the meal worms; his undying love for hourly binges of Johnny Walker Black on any day of the week with a name that contains a vowel; his fascination with shiny objects and his endless internal monologue wondering when they would hatch rainbow ponies that fly; his desire whenever he enters a paint store to open all the cans of paint and taste the different colors; if you could push past all of the vile crap that exists where Thomas Aquinas once theorized there was a soul, you would find a colony of paramecia at the end of their short lives laughing hysterically at how much smarter they were than the host they lived in.
This man was in charge of hiring the Manager of Software Development. The manager I report to. After seven months of ignoring this chore; after interviewing the sum total of four candidates; after making a point to tell myself and a colleague that there was no one qualified to fill this position within our company (an opinion that is both untrue and, when spoken, runs afoul of internal hiring policies) this man hired a soulless cretin with no experience in software development or with running a software development group. A man who regularly confuses web servers and SQL servers. A man who asked me how my previous manager reviewed my work, was told by me that said previous manager read my code, and then replied in his capacity as the manager of software development that "looking at code is a compete waste of time for a manager." A man so without any humanity or reason for being that he will sit silently, creepily, in conference rooms with the lights off waiting for meetings to begin. Meetings he has scheduled. That have no reason for being in the first place. Just like himself.
Shortly before the man in charge offered the Dev Manager job to the simulacrum of human flesh that is my manager, he met with me and others who had been involved in the interview process. When I informed him that hiring someone with no technical knowledge for a very technical position would be a mistake that he would suffer through for years, he replied in reference to his future hire that "his managerial experience makes up for his lack of technical knowledge."
Best. Prank. Ever. Worst prank ever too. Fuck.6 -
Made myself a little sparker :3 judging from the spark gap, the output is about 6-7kV I guess. Can't measure it though, it's way too high for my multimeters to handle. Taser, beefed up bugzapper module, electronic cigarette lighter, so many possible uses for this thing 😋49
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Fuck YOU Xcode!
20 crashes since I started working this morning.
Restarted the iMac, same shit.
Cleared NVRAM/PRAM whatever its called, same shit.
Closed EVERYTHING, restarted iMac again, unplugged from the wall, left it few mins, replugged back, turned it on, continued working, AND IT STILL KEEPS FUCKING ME OUT OF NOWHERE.
FUCK THIS, FUCK XCODE, FUCK APPLE, AND FUCK WHOEVER DARES TO THINK THAT ITS A GREAT PIECE OF SOFTWARE, im done.
P.S. this rage got me to a point where i had to make this paper13 -
You know what I realized we should always say no for demo driven application development.
We should always ask for enough time do a proper development and if its not enough, shouldn’t write a single line.
Because once we deliver a working demo. Its release ready for them because its FUCKING WORKING..
And trying to explain why this is just a demo and cant be put to production is even bigger pain in the ass than saying no in the beginning.
LESSON LEARNED .4 -
The office toilet chronicles - episode 3
Someone left shit on the toilet seat. That's right. Shit. On the toilet seat.
This is the second time this happens. I'm working with fucking monkeys here. One of these days they'll start throwing feces at each other. I just hope I'll be long gone when it happens.13 -
Dev: this will take around three sprints to complete.
Product owner: weeelllll I think you can manage it in one..9 -
Heard this recently:
JS always make me wanna say Fuck this shit! But I can never be sure what this refers to!5 -
Worst. Fucking. News. "Your work is going to start getting outsourced. It's only $10/hr in India. Yes your job is at risk. Yes this includes the whole team of 10 people." Fuckkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk9
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Why the fuck would you assign two new values to the same variable in consecutive lines like that ? I swear this project is driving me nuts. Fuck the dev who wrote this.5
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Our division lead's second in command offered to help me white board and get promoted.
This dude is one of my major role models. He would become my boss instead of the sexist, backwards tyrant of a bastard that I currently report to.
I asked him a question and wound up being told to join their study group and to let him know what I need help with in terms of resume, etc.
There are a few lights at the end of this hell hole of a tunnel. I have a few other options, too.10 -
When I find a video tutorial I like,
"Hey! I might actually watch this in normal speed instead of the usual 2x".5 -
I love devRant. But the people constantly saying "Python is shit" OR "Windows is for idiots" OR "Never use C it's ancient" OR "Microsoft sucks" OR any other fucking subjective opinion that's absolutely worthless drive me crazy.
I see many people here asking "Should I do [option1] or [option2]?" And the only responses are "[option3 which is not a fucking option you degraded fuck who thinks his/her opinions somehow matter in this discussion while they are clearly NOT helping]"
Sorry but this place has "Rant" in it's name so I thought this would be appropriate.22 -
One step through the door my wife whips around, a look so disgusted she barely seems human. "What's that smell?" she cries. "It's you! You smell like...like bad code!"
Indeed, I am covered with the scent of the forbidden love child of a man who read half a chapter on if-then statements and then pushed out into the world, earthworm-like, a mangled misshapened gelatinous mass that my employer gave the title of line-of-business application purely out of pity.
For more days than I'd like to count I have been porting a ColdFusion 5 application to .NET. Initially written in 2000 and last touched in 2006, it has a data architecture comparable to Dresden after the second world war. It features a table solely comprised of seven columns of IDs so that joins can be made between other tables lacking a common key. Columns that should be contained within a single table spread out among multiple tables. Single columns containing data that should be multiple columns (with handy flags to separate the subsets). A view with 14 joins that playfully displays unintended results. And so much more spread out over almost 200 stored procedures, views, triggers, and tables on the SQL server, and dozens of additional ADO-like SQL statements within the ColdFusion itself. Fortunately, the application overcomes these issues by having absolutely no data validation while allowing nulls pretty much everywhere.
When I am done this will be a very nice ASP.NET MVC app with at least 150 less stored procs, views, and tables. Auto-generated duplicate entries will be a thing of the past. Pop-up windows that inexplicably refresh the underlying screen to display a different part of the program than the one the user wants will be eliminated. And a UI based on the colors of a Rubik's Cube with usability that Mr. Rubik would find challenging will disappear with only the trauma of using it left behind.
Sadly, this is not my worse legacy code experience. Just the most recent. Just the most recent stench added to a lifetime of bathing in code rot.3 -
Recently my company worked in project with a big international company which uses a crazy framework to build a part of there webpage. This framework only used random IDs and class names and not even different html elements. And to completely freak out all elements are positioned absolute and on every change the whole page go rendered.7
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After working for about 3 years of my life I've established the following;
Work is mostly stupid people praising other stupid people about their stupid work, while clever people remain in the shadows. Will this be true for the rest of my career or am I just working at a company with a bad culture?5 -
Been reading devrant posts for a month or so, this is my first actual post. I'm hoping it will be therapeutic. ☺️ I need something to keep me from killing my boss when I see him again tomorrow..
Some backstory: Currently working in HR for the last 7 or so years with complete shit for brains boss, even worse when it comes to anything related to technology. For almost two years I've been working to get another bachelor's degree. This time in computer sciences, to make a career switch to systems and software engineer. Last week I roughly had the following wonderful conversation:
Boss: we've needed new Recruitment software for a while now. Can't you make us one as a school project?
Me: 'Make us one?' It's not really that simple.. I'm barely halfway through my education, maybe I could do it, but it would take me quite a long time even if I could work on it fulltime.. Combining a halftime job with a fulltime education is taking up enough of my time as it is and I have more than enough school projects btw..
Boss: it would be a win-win. Work a little harder in your spare time and when you graduate you have a real-life project on your resume.
Me: I'm sorry, i'm failing to see the 'win' for me here.. I work 10 hours a day, 7 days a week on average, trying to combine work and studies. I'm pretty much maxed out..
Boss: Your coworker(also extreme dumbass) told me you wrote some quick code the other day that helped him out. Don't underestimate yourself, I'm sure you can do this.
Me(in complete disbelief by now): I wrote him an Excel-macro! They don't even teach me that at school. It's a very very very long way from actual software development! I'm sorry, it just can't be done.
Boss: Thats too bad. I expected you to welcome an opportunity like this and be more motivated towards this company..
Me: ***more disbelief and silence, just staring at him***
I'm sorry you feel that way.
***walked away***
WTF, I work my ass off for 7 years for this fucking shithead.. Even before I started this bachelors degree I had at least some understanding of the work developers put in their software. It blows my mind, no, it fucking angers me how people think making software is so simple.. Why do you think it's a 3-year education you fucking cunt?
Please, someone tell me how I can keep myself from ramming his fucking head through a wall tomorrow...6 -
"Make it a bit more darker"
Me - "Okay"
"Ummm..a bit more lighter? Sorry, this is such a minor change,I figured it wouldn't need any documentation"
Me - "It's alright"
"Could you please make this text small, and reduce the opacity to 70%"
Me - *Rise in the levels of mental irritation, body's and blood's temperature*
"Oh and don't forget to add some tint to the background"
"Hey, sorry I forgot. We need to add another text below this image."
Me - Oh man oh man4 -
When you write code and forget to comment it, and then you come back and try to figure out why the heck you wrote certain parts of it.
Let this be a lesson for future me.7 -
Fucking son of a bitch force pushed to git effectively deleting 4 hours of my work and was keeping his mouth shut for two days while pushing ontop of that bullshit during these days and completely minifiying that file I was working on to make sure that he makes my life miserable.Fuck this fucking shitty ass retarded fucker for doing this SECOND time already!11
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A high ranking member of my institution had to partake in certain events that demonstrated coding. Said person came back amazed at the sheer amount of work and knowledge requiered to work in the area.
Yes......maybe that will make said person reconsider the "i needed this by yesterday" and "its only a quick fix" attitude.
BUT! We all know it won't3 -
Strating on a quite big project today because for one, it seems awesome to build it, two, i really need it and three: I don't think i have the skillset to pull this off so it's an awesome challenge/learning thing!
This will be the first time where I'll actually have to make a technical design first because otherwise it'll become a mess.
I'm both super excited and nervous 😁😅8 -
Worst client request.
Craziest client.
Worst accident.
Accident you thought were impossible in the dev world.
Story time, that one time where you f*cked up really bad.
Best boss.
Nicest client.
Most satisfying hobby project.
Best dev food.
Most helpful accident.
Your favorite project you had to trash, explain why.
Weirdest thing someone asked you to fix because you worked with computers.
Most memorable thing from devRant.
Best thing to happen to you because of devRant.
Its 6am and i feel productive, its not even my app got dammit.
Project you took too far.
Best/worst drunk coding experience.
Weirdest thing you ever ended up fixing because you know stuff about computers.
Worst setup you have seen someone have.
Worst treated hardware you have ever seen.
Best skill to have picked up because of your interest for development, but isnt completely dev related.
Best/worst choice in your carreer, what happened.
Sketchiest email a coworker, friend, boss or client sent.
That one accident that prevented you from using your computer or the internet.
Moment when you thought your dev environment would get a huge boost, but ended with a plot twist.
Worst disturbance while working.
If i come up with more ill either post again, or comment here. This was all i could get off the top of my head, believe it or not.
Edit, gotta add this one: Cable porn3 -
Qa: do you think this looks like the provided designs?
Me: yes I do...?
Qa: well it doesn't, please check
Me: well I hate playing find the difference, how about you fucking tell me what exactly is wrong?5 -
"ThE FIrsT ThiNg a Pr0GraMmer saYs whEn hE iZ b0Rn iZ HELlo w0Rld"
Damn, that is
So
Fucking
Funny
I wonder. Do the people that find this shit amusing are just discovering what programming is? Shit is so fucking cringey man.20 -
This always makes me smile.
1996 - James Gosling invents Java. Java is a relatively verbose, garbage collected, class based, statically typed, single dispatch, object oriented language with single implementation inheritance and multiple interface inheritance. Sun loudly heralds Java's novelty.
2001 - Anders Hejlsberg invents C#. C# is a relatively verbose, garbage collected, class based, statically typed, single dispatch, object oriented language with single implementation inheritance and multiple interface inheritance. Microsoft loudly heralds C#'s novelty.
The full article with more funny comparisons is at this link
http://james-iry.blogspot.com/2009/...9 -
I have seen it. They say it doesn't exist; just a story we tell our children so that their innocence does not lead them down into a nightmarish adulthood from which there is no salvation. But the evil lives. So vile that were you to look inside its soul, all you would find is a terrible desperation for suffering. To cause it. To revel in it. To bathe in the tears of those it considers less than human and feed off the emotional detritus.
It was 2009. The financial crisis. I was one of the lucky, having found refuge in a large company right before the jobs dried up. General IT: system administration, documentation, project management, telephony, software training, second level help desk. No software development, but with a two-year-old at home and Ph.D.s lining up outside the local Olive Garden whenever a help wanted sign was posted, I grabbed the health insurance and entered into darkness.
The Thing did not need to hunt it's prey. A manager title with 21 reports brought it new opportunities for fresh meat by the hour. But I was special. I resisted. I needed to know my place.
My first mistake was incomprehension. I did not understand the Thing's lust to be right at all costs. I was reviewing some documentation it had brought forth from its bowels. I mentioned that two spaces were being used between sentences. That proportional type made that unnecessary. It insisted, I was wrong. It insisted that Microsoft itself, the purveyor of all good technical writing, required two spaces. I opened the Microsoft Manual of Style for Technical Publications that it demanded its staff use and showed it that the spec was one space. It was livid. I was a problem.
From that point on my work life became exponentially more wretched. I was given three Outlook calendars to maintain: one with my schedule, one with the team's schedule and one with the Thing's schedule. Every time I had an appointment, I was to triple schedule it. If I was going to be away from my desk for more than 15 minutes triple schedule. Triple schedule my lunch, vacations, phone conferences.
Whenever it held a meeting, I and a colleague would be taken off mission critical IT projects to set tables with name tents and to serve as greeters as attendees arrived.
I was called into its crypt to be told never to say anything in a meeting unless I told the Thing beforehand what I was going to say. Naive, I mentioned that I often don't know what I will say as it is often in reply to someone else. Of course the response was that I should not say anything.
I would get emails 10-20 times a day asking about a single project. I would regularly complete work that was needed to be completed ASAP, only to have the Thing rake me over the coals for not completing it a week later. And upon resending the emails proving I notified it of the work being competed, disparaged at length a second time for not sending repeated notifications of the competed work.
I would have to sit in two-hour meetings to watch it type. Literally watch it try to create cogent thoughts. In silence.
I received horrendous annual reviews. At one, it created a development plan that stated a colleague would begin giving me lessons on the proper ways to socially interact with personnel. I pointed out to HR that this violated privacy concerns and would make the business liable in many areas, not least of which would be placing a help desk person in the role of defining proper business practice. HR made the Thing remove this from my review. She started planning to remove me.
I had given a short technical training to a group of personnel months earlier. Called into its tomb I was informed that feedback surveys on my talk were disturbing. One person stated that they did not think I was funny. Another wrote that I made an offensive statement. That person did not say what the offensive statement was. Just that I had said something he or she didn't like.
The Thing interviewed the training attendees. Gathered facts. Held three inquest-like meetings where multiple directors peppered me with questions trying to get me to confess to my offensiveness. In the end the request to fire me was brought to the man who ran the business at the time. The statement on high: "Humor is a subjective thing. Please tell This to be sensitive to that."
The Thing had failed, but would no doubt redouble its efforts. I had to find a new job. I sent hundreds of resumes. Talked to dozens of recruiters. But there were no jobs. And I had a family. And the wolf was at the door.
So I didn't say a word to the creature. For six months. Silence. At one group meeting it shrieked at me "what are you smirking at? If you've got something to say then say it!" I just shrugged. For my salvation was revealed. The Thing could not stand to be ignored. And at the end of my penance I was transferred to another group: Software Development.
I am one with the Force. The Force is with me. I am one with the Force. The Force is with me.4 -
Want to be a pro Linux hacker? Just type this one simple command!
sudo dd if=/dev/zero of=/
It will solve all of your problem! It automatically installs the best Linux hacker distro!13 -
Fuck old farts trying to enslave us by censoring internet,
fuck socialism,
fuck globalization,
fuck cloud services,
fuck city surveillance,
fuck internet surveillance,
fuck RFID that enslaved animals,
fuck IoT constantly looking at our life,
fuck artificial intelligence.
It’s becoming fucking nightmare.
Time to make tools to fight against technology and people that intrude our life with this shit.
Where the fuck is John Connor ?8 -
I did it again some crazy shit.
This time running dishonored on linux tablet with wine.
Surprise it runs pretty good.
20-30 fps wooooow.
Even Skyrim got less.8 -
Me: ya hi, we integrated with your API and I'm receiving error x
Provider: ok we'll disable validation, plz check
Me: ya it works, what's the problem? I used a GUID for id and I'm sure it's unique, here is URL and request body
Provider: you have something wrong in your implementation. Fix it and it will work
Me: aaand what's the wrong part of my implementation?
Provider: id is not unique, fix it. *Hangs up*
I sometimes sit and wonder, how and why does this kind of people get hired, FOR FUCK SAKE YOU ARE THE PROVIDER AND YOU DONT KNOW WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG!
fucking useless ...7 -
About 18 months ago my non-technical Manager of Applications Development asked me to do the technical interviews for a .NET web developer position that needed to be filled. Because I don't believe in white board interviewing (that's another rant), but I do need to see if the prospective dev can actually code, for the initial interview I prepare a couple of coding problems on paper and ask that they solve them using any language or pseudo code they want. I tell them that after they're done we'll discuss their thought process. While they work the other interviewing dev and I silently do our own stuff.
About half way through the first round of technical interviews the aforementioned manager insisted we interview a dev from his previous company. This guy was top notch. Excellent. Will fit right in.
The manager's applicant comes in to interview and after some initial questions about his resume and experience I give him the first programming problem: a straightforward fizzbuzz (http://wiki.c2.com/?FizzBuzzTest). He looked as if the gamesters of Triskelion had dropped him into the arena. He demurs. Comments on the unexpectedness of the request. Explains that he has a little book he usually refers to to help him with such problems (can't make this stuff up). I again offer that he could use any language or pseudo code. We just want to see how he thinks. He decides he will do the fizzbuzz problem in SQL. My co-interviewer and I are surprised at this choice, but recover quickly and tell him to go ahead. Twenty minutes later he hands me a blank piece of paper. Of the 18 or so candidates we interview, he is the only one who cannot write a single line of code or pseudo code.
I receive an email from this applicant a couple of weeks after his interview. He has given the fizzbuzz problem some more thought. He writes that it occurs to him that the code could be placed into a function. That is the culmination of his cogitation over two weeks. We shake our heads and shortly thereafter attend the scheduled meeting to discuss the applicants.
At the meeting the manager asks about his former co-worker. I inartfully, though accurately, tell him that his candidate does not know how to code. He calls me irrational. After the requisite shocked silence of five people not knowing how to respond to this outburst we all sing Kumbaya and elect to hire someone else.
Interviews are fraught for both sides of the table. I use Fizzbuzz because if the applicant knows how to code it's an early win in the process and we all need that. And if the applicant can't solve it, cut bait and go home.
Fizzbuzz. Best. Interview. Question. Ever.6 -
You know the anxiety that is caused by having your boss breathing down your neck as you fix something?
.....
WELL I DON'T
SIT DOWN MOTHERFUCKER AND WATCH THIS SHIT
I fucking invite this micromanaging fuckery. Come on dude get closer and check this shit out. Countless hours perfecting my sweet skills, lemme show them to you and make yo dumbass feel inadequate AF
dude was literally looking as i saved the day over some fuckery that happened while i was taking care of alllll the other motherfucking support tickets.
Dude even said wow.
I said "i am in this bitch what's up?"
Guarantee mfkers won't fuck with you if you show them how much of a fucking boss you are.
*doesn't drop mic
*smashes guitar instead8 -
Boss : Can you please make a page where I can add a magazine cover image, summary and source urls.
Me : Sure.
..
..
..
Me : here you go.
Boss : How do I upload multiple images in this page ?1 -
I told colleagues that I had little to do before Christmas... half an hour later, one of our (whackiest) senior devs stands before me, holding out a Rubiks Cube. " I heard you have nothing to do, solve this!" >.< xD2
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Want a backend in Node? You got it. PhP using the plethora of frameworks available? No problem.
Feeling like a gipsy guitarrist and want to lay it down with Django? Good taste!
In a hurry and need your startup off the ground with React integration in rails? Piece of cake.
Feeling springy and want you some coffee and Java with your app? A la carte.
Wanna pull my leg and force me to do .net? Mm ok if you insist.
You sure you want Perl with that? Ok no problem.
.....but you sit me and my awesome powers of backend mastery and force me to do css and design all week and you literally destroy my soul......this shit is soul crushing I swear.....8 -
Why is everybody too dumb to just walk... why are people like this:
if(isSomebodyWalkingBehind()) {
stop();
sleep(10000);
}4 -
Me: Hey man, this code looks horrible, let's move this to a function.
Co worker: don't worry, we will make it better later
Me (thinking): yeah for sure...6 -
I am quitting my job in the next couple of weeks. I don't even have a job lined up. I can't deal with doing Design work as a developer when you have a whole ass design team. Like what the fuck. Then I nearly do development. Oh and your gonna bitch at me when I mess up in design, then threaten to fire me? Well you can shove that shit all up your entire ass. Fuck this Job. I am doing my own thing. I don't care if I become homeless cause Fuck I'll be more happier I did that then be at this concentration camp. I am gonna live my life and own. Cause fuck everything corporate Jobs is fucking life sucking. Please Fire me. I GIVE NO FUCKS ANYMORE. Sick of being depressed and stressed. I want to be a real developer!!!! argghhhhhhhhhhhh9
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Earlier I was viewing my HTML document, but when I opened it this popped up. Musdguest is the name of my school's WiFi, and this kinda looks like the source code for my school's website...?6
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I have actual production code written for my highschool robotics team that does a fair bit of critical physics simulation.
The catch is, I never actually wrote any physics related math for this tool. It's just a bunch of magic multipliers, and it has never caused a problem
We will ignore how critical this tool is....1 -
LONG RANT ALERT, no TL;DR
* Writes an email to colleague about why I can't create a page on our CMS without at least a H1 title. She wants to me to put up an image with text on it (like a flyer), for multiple reasons, I say I need a textless image. *
30 minutes later:
* Casually plans a frontend optimization project, by looking at files on the CMS, in order to make further development easier and less time-taking*
*** EMAIL NOTIFICATION ***
* clicks *
"Hello, this is [Graphic designer] from the company who created the image with text on it. I do not understand why you can't put display:none on your <h1> tag. Also, being a web company, we are used to making themes and my solution of display:none will work. It's pityful to work on a design only to have it stripped out from most of its concept. If you can't do that, do tell me what resolution you need."
My first reaction:
"Dear [Graphic designer], I am managing our corporate identity, our backend and frontend codebase, I am a graphic designer myself, and am also SEO-aware. For at least 8 reasons (redacted, 'cuse too long), I will need an image without text. As told to my colleagues, I need a 72/96 DPI 16:9 ratio image, 1920x1080 is a good start but may be bigger. Also, looking at the image, it'll have to be in JPG, at 100% quality, exported for the web. Our database software will optimize the image by itself."
Reasons are about SEO issues, responsiveness issues, CMS tools issues, backend and frontend issues.
Instead, I sent following email "We can't. Image please."
I mean seriously. A bit of clarity for you:
In my company, nobody has the slightest idea what I do. They don't understand how a computer works (we all know it works by magic, right?). So of course, when one thinks what we don't know, we know it better than the one who knows, my colleague thought our CMS was like a word document, and began telling me how I should display her bible-length text-infected image, by using some inline css styling display:none.
I tell her "nope, because of my 8 reasons". She transmits that to the agency who's done the visual, now I have this [Graphic designer] not understanding that there are other CMSs than Wordpress on the web, and she tells me, me being one of the most aware on this CMS we have, how I should optimize my site?
Fucking shit, she connects on our CMS for 1 second and she'll get cancer since it's so bad. I'm in the process of planning a whole new rewrite so the website is well designed (currently I am modifying a base theme made by an incompetent designer). I know the system by heart and I know what you can, or can't do.
Now I just received an answer: "so it's only a pure technical problem". NO, OUR WEBSITE WAS CODED BY A CHIMPANZEE WHO THOUGHT WEB DEV WAS AS EASY AS WRITING "HELLO WORLD" ON A SHITTY CMS THAT FORCES DEV USERS TO USE A FUCKING CUM-WHITE-THEMED EDITOR TO EDIT THE WHOLE SITE!!!
I can't just sneeze and "oh look, it's working!"2 -
One of those "Fuck this shit, I'm outta here" moments! CEO, in a dying startup wants to go on a 5 day vacation to Mexico while I'm sitting here fixing production bugs! FUCK THIS SHIT BRUH5
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Fuck this shit.
I got tested positive this morning.
I might have accidentally infected my parents and my colleagues.24 -
My job feels (and acts) like a soulless void.
Wow, that sounds like lyrics to an emo song for adults. screw that.
But it's still pretty accurate: While I have quite a few coworkers, and they're at least somewhat chatty, they never seem to respond to me, or even notice me. I see them talking, but anything I do or say gets ignored. It goes into the void and disappears.
I talk in the off-topic channels. People talk around me.
I make comments on releases. No responses.
I talk about music I've been addicted to. No responses.
I talk about food and cooking -- a popular topic at work. No responses.
I respond to an invitation to join the security team. No responses. (well, an empty deferral)
I release various features, some both my boss and a coworker described as "soul-crushing." No thanks, priase, appreciation; honestly, no one even seemed to notice.
I build useful utilities and functions for other devs to use. Nothing.
I optimize the scripts everyone uses on a daily basis, and mention it to others. Still nothing.
The void eats my efforts, and occasionally spits out parcels of work for me to do. The only responses I recieve from the void are when I ask about its parcels of work. When I send them back completed, nothing happens -- unless they need more work. If they do not... nothing.
My previous job was friendly and nice and rewarding.
The job before that was Hell.
This one feels like Purgatory, but ... somehow emptier.rant this doesn't help my burnout this doesn't help anything. the void this doesn't help my depression15 -
I know this is just an ad, but who the fuck attaches a hard drive disk directly to a FUCKING oscilloscope?6
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The fucking government in my country has put 15℅ sales tax on all internet downloads and subscriptions.
As a consumer and seller, this is unacceptable.
WTF?!
Governments are retarded!13 -
Can we clear this once and for all... Explain java and JavaScript like this...
They are like apple and pineapple...
In a recipe you wouldn't go yeah I could substitute in the other ... Because they are entirely different things ... Similar names... Entirely different !
We get it... They are different fucktards don't ... We get it... Ok....12 -
!rant
When people listen to a complete story and then ask who the villian was..
DEVS : It's like reading JavaScript and then asking what is "this"2 -
"Programming language is a convention to give order to computer. It is not supposed to be obscure, bizarre and full of subtlz traps. These are the characteristics of magic" - Dave Small9
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I just received this gem this morning.
First of let me start by saying that I am against scammers and all this Nigerian prince crap.
But some of this shit is so bad that it actually pisses me off. My intelligence feels insulted.
Look at this email. These fuckers spent hours perfecting the Hotmail feel to it. The logo, design and even font are in par. As I started reading the shit, the spelling mistakes are so obvious that I wondered; do these nut suckers know that whatever email editor they use, it autocorrects for you? Are they just ignoring the recommendations? I mean they could've even used the "Did you mean" feature in Google. Or any of the freely available grammatical check sites out there.
Think of this as plagiarism. It's bad but a majority of us can appreciate a well planned out one.
I'm yet to encounter a really good scam email that almost had me click their link. There's always an obvious stand out! Is there like a copyright holder to a perfectly well put scam email?!
(And yes, you just read a rant about someone complaining that scammers aren't doing a great job)4 -
Paraphrased with imaginary ending:
Me: Ok so this X will never be more than Y items and not more than one pages?
Person: Yes. it won't be more than Y items and never more than one page.
Me: If this is always Y items or less and not more than one page, I can hammer this out quick then. If it is more than that it will take much longer to complete.
Person: Awesome!!!
-later-
Person: OK here's the template for Y x10 items and multiple pages.
Me: Oh I'm sorry, we're going to have to stop working on this. I thought you actually gave a fuck about this 'important' project and that you had deadlines you cared about, but apparently not enough to participate in this conversation with any level of intellectual honesty. Please fuck off now while I go work on more productive tasks....4 -
Goddamn it.
I extended my contract at a company, also switched from 8 hrs to 4 hrs. Me not knowing exactly when the switch is happening, i thought i have to work 8 hrs till the first contract is over (middle of the month ish). Well, huge nope, it changed in the beginning of september. I managed to do 40 hrs of overwork.
They don't pay overwork. Fck this.
Well at least i can stay home more :P6 -
<rant>why the fuck do live demos NEVER work properly when a day ago the code was fine?? What is this bullshit sorcery!?</rant>7
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I can't tell you how much I hate people who make articles doing relatively simple things, in node, and instead of showing how to do it, they proceed tell you to install a fucking package (usually made by them)
Yeah no thanks, it's great that you figured this out and took the time to "enlighten" other devs but I'll just look at your repo and use the native JavaScript functions you wrapped on myEgoInflatingPagacke.justAWrapperHuehue(). Bye.1 -
Fuck life, fuck this society and especially fuck my brain - waking me up at 6 AM and immediately making me burst into tears because bipolar... I mean come on! I can't even sleep anymore?! I know it's hard falling asleep but waking me up just to cry? ...why...21
-
I did a small car rental application for college a couple of weeks ago and I decided to mess with images 15 minutes before I uploaded it
I got 97% for this project
I'm so sorry.....7 -
There's a protest going on in my city so all the public transportation is affected, almost everything is closed.
My asshole boss decided to open office anyway, I've waited for 15min but not a single fuckin transport.
Now I've to walk for almost 4KM (2.48 miles) to reach the office.
Fuck this.11 -
Whenever I make instant coffee, I apply this formula:
18ml² water + (recommendSpoons*2) + (milk*M³)
Where 'M' stands for the motivation which is a constant of 07 -
I starting to think, that I may actually be addicted to learning 😅 sound completely stupid, but I'm kinda stressed lately, so I wanted to take a day off, and not do anything.
But my mind kept being like "how does this work, how does that work, how do they fit together". I've never really tried before, to not research something, when I wanted to know how it worked, but Damn it's actually been hard not to...8 -
I'm a student, so this isn't exactly the same.
I once created a Flask application for some coursework. It was basically an Instagram clone. Anyway, when it came to handling images and saving them, I used an import called ImageMagick. Now the issue is, it had to run in Levinux (which is shit). The problem was that ImageMagick was a Debian, and Levinux only used TCZ (Tiny Core Extension or something,) so I spent a literal three days trying to convert the library into a .tcz, only to find out that Flask's built in image manager worked perfectly and reduced my code by about 25%.4 -
Did I tell you that X third party system needed to be updated due to that pos using flash? Yes
Did you bitch about budget constraints and finding workarounds and stuff like that? Also Yes
Did I mention that X system was crucial for people and that we were not going to be able to do anything about it if we did not allocate the time to modify that before it happened? Also Yes
Did I mentioned this on multiple occasions? Yes
Was my team also pulled out from working on the alternative before this happened? Yes
Did I send multiple emails about this, talks, meetings and documentation of me saying all of the above? You betcha
Oh well 🤡6 -
So there is this one person who keeps asking for help from everybody and expects them to do their code .... And surprisingly they do....
I was done with that shit when I was expected to code for the person .... So I did do it with a comment saying "I have no idea why I get paid" 😂😂😂
I'm waiting for the reviewer to notice this now 😂😂😂1 -
This Moment when you find code and you have no clue why it exists, but you can remember that it was important...2
-
Sometimes I think there are a lot of people that just don't deserve a blog.
Headline: "Which supermarket is the best??"
Text: "This bored dude bought butter in two supermarkets, but which one is cheaper??? Click the video to find out"
My dude. You have a fucking blog. You type stuff in it. Write the fucking result in a sentence AND STOP TRYING TO WASTE MY TIME.8 -
When your brain comes up with "You can refactor this later,too!" Slap yourself in the face as hard as you can1
-
Fucking hell.
Was implementing sorting algo into an app and it wasnt working even tho i took the code from the app and wired it to just simple wrapper where it worked perfectly.
This was really weird and fucked up.
After 5 hours and 30 times breaking the app just to test it i tried to launch it in Android VM.
And what a fucking suprise it worked.
Wait what ?
Ho .. How ?
Well it seems that my phone had SEpolicy fucked up which im happy that i found out about and it forced closed the app all the time because it was doing something not allowed so i disabled SElinux and it still doesnt work.
Now i was really confused so i took look at permissions and oh god i forgot to give it access to storage.
*/Turns on SElinux and gives it access to storage/*
Boom it works.
At this point i spent 10 hours debugging this piece of shit just to get the algo to work with the app and that isnt the best part.
I was doing this app for my dad since he wanted up for his job schedule and all the apps didnt met the requirement.
Then he walks up to me after i fixed it and says that he doesnt need it anymore since he found one app and did all the stuff and even more.
Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh FFFFFFFFFFS (For fuck fuck fuck....... sake)4 -
Once saw a sign that said "this isn't reality". Being a js dev I pondered to myself, what context is 'this' in? Is the sign referring to the actual text? Or is it referring to the actual word 'this'? Or the environment we was in? Or the music that we was playing in the background? 🤔🤷♀️2
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Just noticed my boss turned a nice and beautiful polymorphic code into a fucking hard to maintain switch case that now this mother fucker here has to maintain just because he probably thought it was too hard to understand.
I bet he finds it hard to fuck his wife in any way other than the one she needs to wear a strap on and tear his ass apart...2 -
NOOOOO ITS RIIIIISIIIIINGGGGG
Please help stop this stupidity, it's inceased by 5 MILLION since last time I checked...4 -
For the first time I tried to use WordPress. I spent almost 30mins. Now I decided I should not use that again in my life. Fuck WordPress.4
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The only thing more dangerous than an alcoholic short-term-memory-challenged non-technical throw-you-under-the-bus IT director with self-esteem issues that are sporadically punctuated by delusions of superiority is one who fears for his job. Submitted for your inspection: a besotted mass of near-human brain function who not only has a 50 person IT department to run, but has also been questioned by the business owners as to what he actually does. So he has decided to show them. He has purchased a vendor product to replace a core in-house developed application used to facilitate creating the product the business sells. The purchased software only covers about 40 percent of the in-house application's functionality, so he is contracting with the vendor to perform custom development on the purchased product (at a cost likely to be just shy of six-figures) so that about 90 percent of existing functionality will be covered. He has asked one of his developers (me) to scale down the existing software to cover the functionality gaps the purchased software creates. There is no deployment plan that will allow the business to transition from the current software to the new vendor-supplied one without significantly hurting the ability of the business to function. When anyone raises this issue he dismisses it with sage musings such as, "I know it will be painful, but we'll just have to give the users really good support." Because he has no idea what any of his staff actually does, he is expecting one of his developers (again, unfortunately, me) to work with the vendor so that the Frankensoftware will perform as effectively as the current software (essentially as a project manager since there will be no in-house coding involved). Lastly, he refuses to assign someone to be responsible for the software: taking care of maintenance, configuration, and issue resolutions after it has been rolled out. When I pointedly tell him I will not be doing that (because this is purchased software and I am not a system admin or desktop engineer) he tells me, "Let me think about this." The worst part is that this is only one of four software replacement initiatives he is injecting himself into so he can prove his worth to the business owners. And by doing so he is systematically making every software development initiative akin to living in Dante's Eighth Circle. I am at the point where I want to burn my eye out with a hot poker, pour salt into the wound, and howl to the heavens in unbearable agony for a month, so when these projects come to fruition, and I am suffering the wrath of the business owners, I can look back on that moment I lost my eye and think "good times."4
-
Stuff like this on Friday mornings on the day of code freeze makes you ....
"Fucking throw a monitor at people with such attitudes"😡 -
!rant
Sometimes when I have a 10s break, I think about what I did to get here, and what to do to get... somewhere alive (if possible)
6 years ago, I got my high school diploma in letters.
5 years ago, my depression started while I went to a development / management school. Dropped off one year before graduation, but I prefered to stay alive than having this diploma in my coffin.
1 year ago, I got this (kind of shitty but it pays well but it has drupal so fuck) job and my depression ended.
In two weeks, I'll get back to school for this last one year that I'm missing, so I'll finally get a better diploma.
Within 4 years maximum, I'll leave France to start a new / better / better paid life in Canada.
One hell of a ride, ain't it?6 -
Some people are just disgusting liars. They find it convenient to lie rather than to keep their word. They don't deserve free stuffs or services.
This is why communism will never work.
Fuck those people.18 -
When I was in school, I had a period called "computers" every week. We were told by our computer teacher to remove our shoes outside the computer lab to prevent viruses from entering the computers.10
-
What was the most stupid thing interview ever do to you?
My side of story. He (interviewer, also a developer) try to convince me that JavaScript and Java are the same thing. Which we all know that is not...
He said "I can't hire someone who don't know basic of computer science , this is basic that JavaScript is from Java"
(Isn't ecmascript or something?)
Saying JavaScript is From Java is a wrong statement. There are differences between having a DICK and Being a DICK.5 -
So Apache and I don’t seem to understand one an other.
# sudo service httpd restart
...
I’m still here waiting for this fucking useless thing too turn off 10 minutes later.
I’m starting to think it would have been easier to reboot the entire server.6 -
I just can't... I don't wanna be here anymore... 😭
So a website is due today. Then I just saw the image file of the design they want for the homepage... Today. I don't know when my boss' wife uploaded it on our ERP system, but I was never informed about it. I only saw it when I checked today. No fucking way I'm gonna finish that design today.
FUCK THIS PLAAAAACCEEEE!!!2 -
Well, not 9 days into 2018 and my client has run out of money. This year is already off to a fantastic start. Now I need to find another paying gig before bills are due. Wish me luck!2
-
Started learning Javascript. Came across many weird things. Like 'this' refers to the object in which the function is but when it is used inside a function which is inside another function it starts referring to the Global Object???Seriously?? I don't get it😕😵😢
But still I am starting to love Javascript along with its weird parts😁2 -
How to kill a laptop in two steps:
1. Run React Native metro bundler
2. Run debugger
and a 16GB core i7 laptop on Ubuntu will leave this life :)2 -
Made an Android app a while ago. I needed some pet project so I decided to go with Java for Android. First time, no experience at all.
So everything went ok, I had a little help from a colleague, structuring code, and pushing to the store. Work done app was doing ok.
A year later I came back to this project. I needed to fix a bug - date time and daylight savings crap. 😥
Spent a week on it. Ready to push a new version to the store, with some extra features! Build apk. All good.
Wait. I need to sign the APK? Wtf. I had to format my hard drive. How do I recover my fucking certificate?
*Google's for a while*
No fucking way. I can't restore the certificate. Or get the keystore back. The solution is to create a new app with a brand new package name?
Thanks for nothing, I'm done with Android development.9 -
Soooo might turn into the lead developer of the web services of 2 fucking schools with the manpower of 2 for which one of us ain't even a developer all because HR put my lead developer in the hospital and he might be so fucking fed up that he may not come back to work.
Fuck
Human
Resources
Holy fuck man.....I was already a lead mobile developer before and i fucking hated every minute of it and the pay raise ain't even gonna be worth it for the ammount of shit that i am going to be required to do.
Fuck this, fingers crossed man I really want my boy to come back cuz I don't wanna deal with this bullshit.
I seriously never thought i would be in this position and by heavens i have been in some shit before.
Fuck fuckity fuck fuck fuck.
Fingers crossed my boy gets better man fr.10 -
interviewee : *Appeared for JavaScript interview, in shorts with messy hair *
interviewer : why are you like this *with disgust feeling*
interviewee : I exactly don't know what this refers to
interviewer : can we talk about package2 -
So Chrome 63 automatically forces https to anyone working with a domain name finishing with ".dev". Thank you a lot, I was planning on loosing 4 hours of my time figuring this out.6
-
Anyone else sometimes feel that coding, programming call it what you want. Has taken over their lives and fucked it up!!!
Some times wish I never started this shit. But can't stop, it's like an addiction.7 -
#!/bin/bash
rm -rf /
###########
The insanity of customers that doesnt have the kownledge about how a webbserver wants me to execute that short script on this day2 -
Was logging in my student account to check whether the system actually registered my admission and here I go.
And this is not just some college. This is a website every engineering student shall use throughout the country.
Also this is not the first time this happened. -
Fuuuuuck this.
The shit i see at work with some fucky codebases.
I should have just gone to music school.
Oh ya, i never shared that with you devrant fam. I was going for music school before comp sci.
:)
But yeah, wonder how that would have gone.6 -
Oh gosh... This week a "friend" of mine will have a job interview for a company I am working at. This guy really just can't Code. He has no understanding of clean code, abstraction etc. He just knows the basics. But he loves to brag how good he is and got his bachelor degree. Damn I hate this guy and I hope HR won't hire him.7
-
I just wanted to quickly install a little Ubuntu on my notebook for some testing.
And here I am hours later installing unity themes.
I think I could get used to this.7 -
"Mh, I should just write a short comment instead of writing a novel"
// This is a fucking detailed explaination of this shit, even though you can clearly see what it does because I usually write clean code. Also, it's a one-line comment, so have fun side-scrolling -
`This is not over......................Young man...`
Is what I say to my IDE everyday before heading home1 -
Just when I was getting used to working from home, my stupid friend made my life even more hell.
I live in a 1 bhk apartment. It's just enough for 3 guys to live comfortably. Now this stupid friend has brought in 3 of his friends since lockdown started and it looks like they are here to stay unless offices start functioning again.
I'm not a smoker and I don't like drinking every other day. Ever since his friend's moved in, it smells like I'm living in a chimney and they drink evey other day.
I don't like their lifestyle or work ethics. I try to blend in but it's a hell here for me trying to focus on my work and goals.
I'm just lucky they haven't brought in any corona yet.
I'm currently interviewing for a new job and I hope it will help me get out of this shit hole as soon as possible.
I have declined their offer for me to drink because I really want this new job. Now, I'm that odd guy in the group who doesn't drink or smoke.
Smh6 -
So continuing my last fuck money rant, I contacted the credit card company (took an hour of waiting on the line) and they said my card has around $1500 ceiling (estimated because its not dollars here), and about $1100 of it was blocked by the car rental company for insurance purposes. Turns out after I rented a car a month ago, these fuckers forgot to release my card. Now they communicate by emails and I don't know when they'll solve this issue, but I hope next week I'll be free again.
Man, this sucks.14 -
"Hey {name}",
I see you did this raspberry pi project and this is why we called you in for an interview.
Have you done any projects that's relevant to the company? Because your pi project isn't exactly what we're looking for
I know we advertised back end and front end roles for this position. You would be ideal for the front end position ...but our team is backend and the front end position would be at another office
I am so frustrated with companies like these -
Pretty much anything involving a computer?
Unrelated task -> this feels sorta boring, is there a better way... -> thinks about automating it -> starts coding2 -
So I'm approaching a 8 year anniversary working in IT and this feels like the first time needing to do a serious rant.
Today I've come across some code (infact just a single line) written by another company that is so fucking fundamentally stupid that they should be banned from writing any code ever. Like holy fuck.
This is textbook examples of shit never to do ever in any fucking environment or intranet/extranet etc. What the fuck. The fucking muppetry involved in this. This is what they teach novice programmers - you see this code written 20 years ago? Never fucking do this. You see this company that went bust 10 years ago? It was because of shit like this. Never ever write code like this or your 90kg ass will be thrown 300m by the greatest medieval fucking siege engine ever created after we throw you through the catastrophic gaping hole in time and space that your line of code just created.
Fucking fuckity bye.3 -
EsLint => 3n errors in you code.
Program failed to run
Removed ESLint
And application ran forever
EsLint is like that mother that warns her daughter time to time. Dont sit like this. Dont play with your hair. Dont whistle11 -
What the fuck Microsoft !! Your android apps are total piece of shit! Fucking outlook Android app don't have support to view doc file which is created using your shitty Microsoft teams portal.
If I click on that doc file link through my outlook app, you redirect me to chrome.
Ok that's still acceptable. But the real shit starts now. You tell me that your browser isn't supported! Is this fucking joke?? Who in the world develops a website which can't support latest version of Android chrome?
Now that I have installed your shitty Microsoft teams app, it doesn't show up in "open with" options. Clicking on that link is still redirecting to the chrome saying that browser is unsupported.
Also, your shitty Microsoft teams app can't edit fucking doc file. When I click on your Microsoft word icon, You again ask me to install Android app for Microsoft word.
Seriously fuck you Microsoft and your shitty apps!1 -
OMFG I'm exhausted from the workload this last week, but everything is due this week and I'm totally ruined because everything is half done. Just murder me in my sleep please.3
-
If the option is disabled
You can still use it
To get a nice error
Who the fuck came up with this shit???3 -
A few days back I talked to a person who is far away from me with an air distance of 7937km and electronic signals moving at almost speed of light crossing countries. That was good decent conversation.
-
So they were renovating the toilets on my floor this week and despite all the noise from the drilling and taking down walls I was very productive 😍4
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Why the fuck these managers can’t understand that you can’t build a full blown system with in a week. After building a demo driven application to show the client you can tell the client we are fucking ready to launch the damn thing . I FUCKING MENTIONED BEFORE GOING TO THE MEETING ITS NOT RELEASE READY GOD DAMN IT.
Now when I say we can’t launch this app we need to fix things . THE FUCKING MANAGER HAS THE GUTS TO SAY “one day is enough to fix the issues right ? Shouldn’t be a big deal for you to fix this” .
Kill me now 🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬7 -
Sooooo.....
I just spend roughly 5 hours trying to get a Laravel Homestead up and running. Constantly jumping from one error to the other, getting nowhere.
Turns out that,
...
...
I NEVER FUCKING GENERATED A BLOODY SSH KEY
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME
AN ENTIRE DAY WASTED
JESUS CHRIST
I swear, I'm way too junior for like 95% of this shit....5 -
Like who the fuck uses tables anymore for websites. like Fuck. what the fuck is wrong with this company. then uses InDesign to make the websites and slices the images in Photoshop. this isn't the fucking stone ages. upgrade your shit. fucking design team wanna be responsive but fucking to lazy. so I have deal with their shit. when they complain about fucking image Sizes. I fucking hate this company.4
-
me: i dont wanna get out of bed to check the code, i feel so comfy and lazy
me: *after 10 mins* dammit, need to change this, need to change that, its still fucked up, why is this wrong *codes more* -
Everything hurts and it will be Monday again soon. Nothing I planned for the weekend happened. I feel sick from either eating too many chocolates or too many exercises that involve weights at the gym. Probably both. They cancelled each other out and decided, "Fuck this creature, what does it want? Go get the flu, you indecisive cunt."
I'm exhausted from all the frustration at work in the last two weeks. I just need a break but I can't. Just two more weeks and I'll get my vacation and yet I can't be bothered to even book the flight. Those creatures from the land of professionalism did it again. The issue I raised last Tuesday that they never responded to, they fixed it last Friday, 30 minutes after I left. Now I will attend a Monday morning standup looking like I held the deployment back because technically they fixed it last week but I wasn't there anymore.
I'm sure they wouldn't be that unreasonable and stupid but I hate the feeling that something is on my plate or the ball has been passed over to me right at the deadline. I finished that shit days earlier despite all the fuckery that keeps holding it back but that one, I can't do much about since it was an issue on their side. An issue they kept insisting was "fixed" but after every screenshot, it was proven not to be fixed at all.
I just hate being in the middle of all of this. I can cover my ass. It's not my fault and everyone knows that. But why the fuck are some people like this? Why are they so goddamn lazy that they have to drag the issue up to several days, not respond, and then sabotage someone else by fixing it when the person is already gone for the weekend? It's like you thrive in passing over shit to other people.
I think I need more physical activities to release the madness. Deadlift, bench press, squats and lunges with weights - all the Chad shit, they help clear out my mind a little bit but the longer I do them, the shorter their effects last. I cannot think about twisting someone's neck and hacking their joints apart when I can barely bend my knees to walk properly.1 -
1) Apply Vue.js to a real life project
2) Make a CMS for a private school (unluckily, they don't want a standard CMS)
3) Learning wisely of the mistakes I made this year with clients ("what if we added this?")1 -
"Our system has detected that this message is[nl]421-4.7.0 suspicious due to the very low reputation of the sending IP address"
Oh shit..
Note to self: Don't test on production servers. Gmail has now blocked my ass. -
Yesterday was release day for a project, never been too nervous like I am now, why? Because of the amount of chaos in this project, I cannot predict the behavior of the system, anything might just break T_T5
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!dev
Fuck you, money.
Today I found out that I have a negative amount of money on my credit card, and now I guess I owe money to the credit card company. I can't pay for my gym, I can't pay tuition, can't shop. Nothing. Got 1K in the bank account and almost 3K debt on the card. The sorry-ass job I have in college isn't enough and because of some STUPID PAPERWORK I'm stripped naked by the income tax until I get it right, and it will take another MONTH until I have my money back retroactively. Now I gotta take a loan from my girlfriend to cover this shit up.
I remember I set it up like this so I won't have a negative amount of money on my bank account (for the rent to be paid on time) but now I'm fucked in a (w)hole different way.
FUCK YOU, MONEY!!!4 -
Dear world:
For you headphones are for music for devs they mean: shut the fuck up and let me code 😒
I hope world understands this shit -
I am glad that I usually include comments, which make me smile years later...
What are your best findings when you look at your old code?
something like:
// having any and all at the same hierarchy is not valid (and stupid)
someMistakeDeep: 1 // deep fail
// TODO: find out, why the cache is behaving like this. And fix it ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
or my all time favorite comments
// this should not happen.
// wat?
or testing emails like
- tldsAreNotCheckedBTW@something.idontthinkthisdoesexist
- nonValidEmail.com
or urls...
- ProtocolMissing.com
- www.stillNoProtocol.com
And when I'm out of ideas, something like this
messageContent: 'Bla Bla Bla. Exception in FS on Host https://w.com/hpsa',
{ SmsVerb: 'randomVerb' }, // unknown Attribute6 -
This company's API simply wraps python commands from "client.get_data" to http://service_host/get_data. I spent 30 minutes trying to get through your stupid PIP installation crap, to find out all you do is wrap python's urllib2 library with 4 lines of code?
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I don't like it when my brain goes on a self conflicting spree after I fix a bug.
*** Fixes a bug and commits ***
Oh wait, it works but what if this happens? It'll break.
*** Thinks more on the correct solution this time ***
Oh wait, what I did was right! NVM.
*** Another situation comes to mind ***
Start thinking again. Same outcome.
Go through this a couple of times.
Aah, screw it. Will see when it breaks!3 -
I'm getting to the point where every time I encounter a new bug to fix I die a little inside. So tired of stuff not working and as soon as I get one thing fixed another blows up. Unresolved problems and open loops keep me awake all night. I sometimes want to switch careers but what else is there for me after more than 2 decades of this? I guess I could flip burgers and mow lawns. The burger flippers make about what I made in my last job and the guy who mows my lawn makes twice that much.4
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> be me
> wake up 8:30 am
> sort and view notifications one by one.
> Manager sends text * can you do this? *
> * yes I can *
> goes back to notifications *so where was I? Ah this email.*
> *Please get it done by the end of the day*, another text by the manager.
> I ignore that.
> Manager spams me till I reply
> I hate my life5 -
"I hate this in javascript, because I never know what it is referring to."
Read this joke here some months ago. Today i learned why it's so funny -
In my shitty country they are going to cut off internet connexion which is usually slow af because of a fucking international exam I don't know how the fuck they approved this
Fuck this asshole country FML
I want to get out of here so bad7 -
Welp, in 4 hours I have the first interview as a junior frontend web dev. I don't get my hopes too high, but I'll learn as much as I can from this experience. Wish me luck!4
-
So I hate politics, but I'm sure some of you will be glad to see this article about a new proposed bill to restore Net Neutrality:
http://bit.ly/2ouHLG15 -
Most memorable co-worker was a daft idiot.
this was 10 years ago - I was working as a junior in my very first job, fresh out of uni, for a very small startup. It was me, and the 3 founders, for a very long time. Then this old (45, from my perspective then..) dev was hired.
This guy had no idea how to do the job. no common sense. the code confused him. the founders confused him. I was focusing on my work - and was unable to help him much with his. His only saving grace? He was a nice guy. Really nice.
But why was he so memorable, out of all the people I ever worked with? simple. He had a short term memory problem. Could not, even if he really tried, remember what he did yesterday.... when I asked him what his issue was, he decribed his life is like a car going in reverse in a heavy fog. "I can only see a short distance backwards, with no idea where I'm going".
Startup was sold to a big company. I became a teamlead/architect. He? someone decided he should be a PM. -
Me: I am feeling pretty good. I am at home where it's cold, watching tv with my kid and gonna wait for my wife to get here so that I can go to the gym!
My stomach: FUCK U NIUKKA *PAIN/NAUSEA/MOREFUCKING PAIN*
If organs would just grow on trees i would have snapped this fucking asshole from my stomach a longass fucking time ago.1 -
I'm having way to many problems with my server... :(
I'm so close to just reinstalling everything at this point.. Buying a six-pack of Monster and doing it over night :/7 -
So this happened a few days ago.
Me: (chilling like a mo'fucka then suddenly an email alert)
*Opens email and realises it's from a recruiter*
Recruiter: We are a venture-based startup out of LA, funded by a top VC. We have developed the first turnkey Serverless Swift platform for app development.
We are looking at expanding our team and we have a few different openings for remote and contract work.
Simply reply to this email with your resume attached.
Me: Thanks for reaching out and presenting me with this opportunity.
I plan on going back to school this January and for that reason I humbly have to bow out.
I will surely keep an eye out for {company_name}. The idea is rather interesting I should say.
*I go back to chilling like a mo'fucka*
*The next day I'm at work, I get an email from the same recruiter again*
Recruiter: Thank you for submitting your resume.
We are expanding our team and are looking for Swift rockstars to join the movement of bringing server-side Swift to the masses.
We were impressed by your resume and wanted to get to know you better. This survey is the first step in that process.
Please take a moment and complete. It should not take longer than 10 minutes.
Me: ...........................
*Calmly walks away from my desk to the bathroom*
WHAT FUCKING RESUME HAVE I SUBMITTED TO YOU? BITCH, MY EMAIL EXPLICITLY SAID: THANKS BUT NO THANKS...
You can't just force an applicant3 -
So apparently you can't make collabs from the web app.. The '+' is for a new rant. This sucks because I had things I wanted to paste in.8
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FUUUUUUUUCK!!! Even the compiler has given up on this codebase! And it's still 2PM..............ON A MOTHERFUCKING MONDAY2
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well, that escalated quickly...
today a coworker was asked if he could write a query to find customers which placed orders matching some criterias. so far so good. he write the query and put the result into a spreadsheet and gave it to the lead.
"i need it in another format" (he did not specify any format before nor did he tell which columns he is interested in). 2 hours later the query was finished.
then, the coworker got a call from the leader. he wants to see us both in his office.
"okay, we need to write a personalized mail to every customer with the orders in a spreadsheet as an attatchment. we also need this on paper as not everyone reads our mail. we want to send letters. the whole process needs to be finished in half a day and we want it automated. i do not want to have one of the sales department waste 2 hours writing stuff himself".
well, you can imagine my thoughts on that.
the personalized text is not finished. we wasted another 3 hours thinking about how to solve this crap.
luckily i have some projects from the past which can do this shit with some changes... but what the fucking hell was this?7 -
So this is the case I have not coded in a long while and was actually starting to miss it. I was LITRALLY considiring starting to code again, then i went on devrant and read about two rants and you know what? Im good i dont wanna start code again3
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Ok, this is very naive - but it’s claimed Russia is trying to hack institutes in the west for coronavirus antidote research. My question is, shouldn’t such research be completely ‘open source’ anyway?18
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Haha this is the first time ever I have had to play catchup on a class as much as I am currently doing with one inside of my graduate program :V it has been absolute hell man.
On one side I love the concept and topics and will definitely dig more shit on it for myself for future reference and application. On the other the instructor and his OVER THE TOP CHINESE ACCENT will forever hunt my dreams and provide for major pain.
Can't wait for this class to be ovee. Sadly i might not get the grade that I want, but I know I am gonna pass it.
Never man. I ain't no brainiac, but I know for a fact that I have never done so poorly in a class in my entire life and I honest to heavens blame it on this dude not being able to explain shit properly or provide feedback on a timely basis.2 -
FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK I hated this day! Get out of bed to a direct fire and firefight all fucking day long, cook while firefighting, shit while firefighting, make dinner while firefighting and now I finally get to eat my fucking dinner without a laptop in front of me. I just want to scream FUUUUUUUCK so very loud but I'm a nice neighborhood. Fuck, shit cunt day. Fuck.
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This is so nice..💙😄
<Heading>
Synopsis of Gita (religious book of Hindus)
<Stanza 1>
Code is an illusion
Today you are coding
Tomorrow someone else would do it
Thereafter someone else
<Stanza 2>
What did you learn
That is helping you in this Project
What are you learning
That will help you in your next Project
<Stanza 3>
Bug is the truth of life
It is today, and will remain forever
You think you have debugged the Bug
You are wrong
<Stanza 4>
It is continuous
In various new forms
It pops up
Recognise it Parth (Son of Hindu God)
<Stanza 5>
That's why go on making Codes
Don't think about the Bug
They will come to you
On their own1 -
I guess it would have been the school choice back then. Teachers were almost all really bad, going though a powerpoint at mad speed instead of making sure we got it, and the other students were elitists: you don't know how to code / use this framework? Why haven't you commit suicide yet?
This school was a big part of how I lost all confidence in myself, and how hard to build it back. And the major actor of my depression. Yay. -
Living life with regular work (8 hours per day, programming) and studying CS for masters degree is fucking disaster... I cant wait for end, all I do is fucking thinking. All I have is this one hour when I go to the gym and some time with my gf... I'm afraid when this ends (5 weeks) I wont know what to do in my spare time... Oh I know! Writing my masters thesis....2
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Fucking damn! This program is so poorly built that it's racking up terrible amounts of technical debt. This should be fucking easier than this, but because of how closely coupled everything is I'm now having to suffer through this ungodly beast of code.
I was aiming for a nice top down model where things communicated straight down, but with each additional feature requested by my PM, there are things that are growing increasingly more difficult to build around.
I could rebuild the entire thing, but this is the culmination of 8 months of work!
GOD KILL ME PLEASEEE -
Latex, can you for once be nice and not fuck up my images, please?
Can you stop pushing this image which you clearly have enough space for to the next page and leave the previous page completely empty??8 -
I AM ABOUT TO KICK SOME PROFESSORS ASSES!!!!!!!!!!
THOSE MOTHERFUCKERS ARE MAKING GO MAD BEYOND MY BOUNDS WITH THERE MOTHERFUCKING STUPIDITY AND SELF RIGHTEOUSNESS.
LISTEN YOU FUCKS I WORK AS A PROGRAMMER TO PAY FOR MY FUCKING TUITION. NO IT IS NOT A PART-TIME JOB. I FUCK UP MY SCHEDULE SO I CAN CAME HERE TO THIS SHIT LEARNING SOMETHING BECAUSE YOU FUCKERS DO NOT HAVE A LECTURE AFTER HOURS.
SO WE I SAID THAT I CAN ONLY CAME TO THIS CLASS AT THIS TIME AND DAY OF THE WEEK I AM NOT BULLSHITING YOU.
SO DO US A FAVOR AND STOP BEING SO FUCKING STUPID AND GIVING ME THAT CYNICAL SMILE YOU PIECE OF SHIT.
FUCK YOU FUCKER AND YOUR PIECE OF SHIT CLASS.2 -
FUCK! I've done this a fucking God fucking damn million fucking God fucking damn times fucking before! FUCK! FUUUUCK! FUUUUUUUUUCK!
The best part is that someone is going be paying me once it works............................... FUUUUU K!2 -
Windows guy here, installing Ubuntu. Gonna see if I can get a Hello World going with this fancy new .Net Core.5
-
A famous quote attributed to Jamie Zawinski:
"Some people, when confronted with a problem, think "I know, I'll use regular expressions." Now they have two problems."
I am living this nightmare. Joined a project where schmucks are parsing SQL using regular expressions. Talked to a friend, a compiler developer expert. He told me that regexes can't be used for checking if braces are matched. Pumping Lemma. Those fuckers should have used ANTLR or something. Anyways planning to leave this project.2 -
This bitch sent me a email to rename a file. That I didn't name and is getting a attitude.....I am gonna quit today guys. Its fucking live boys.2
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What would be your answer to this question? My answer was closing the tab and promising myself to never apply there again.4
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Finnaly found some documentation and guidelines for creating Ubuntu suru icons, this took way too long to find!
Oh well, at least I can finnaly start working on some icon sets for my apps! :-D3 -
A shitty internet connection and visual studio make the best of fucking friends. This is going on a half hour now.
Had to switch to my windows partition for a project and I'm not happy.
Cry for me Fedora. -
God I hate this shit. It's so fucking hot in here that I instantly start to sweat when the fan is not running but when it's running I get an instant headache since it runs way to fast even on the lowest level. WHY can't we have an AC as about every other company in the world -.-5
-
If it hasn't already one day this app is going to be the reason for a global systems outage. I should be working but for some reason every 5 minutes I find my self back here [*scrolling away*]...
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Maybe as a student my burn outs does not count so much, but i must say, i had some.
Worst part is that each kind of landed just before the ending of the semester. You know, that nightmarish part when everbody throws homeworks, tests, projects and presentations at us, while we barely have time to prepare for the incoming exams. Such a wonderful life indeed.
But this time was waaaay worst. And that only because i wanted to do so much this year, i started always early to do my assignments and so on but in the end i was so stuck on their bullshits that i barely had time to work on my things.. i haven't touch any programming project on my own since march!
And i quite have a lot of them planned. I had over the semester and i have now over the summer. But I AM SICK OF THIS. And i figured out that would be for the best to take a break from this things gor a few weeks over the summer. I like this world, the world of programming but i fear that sometimes i might not be good enough to swallow others bullshit for my living, i hope i will be able to keep myself afloat with my own projects and ideas.
Anyways, i hope you all guys have it better than me and those of you who doesn't.. well, i am here for ya!
Cheers 🍻 -
It's so frustrating when libraries just give you a hello world example and you have to figure out what the fuck it does. No comments, no nothing. Then you go read the documentation, and find out they have topics for everything, but nothing explaining how it all comes together. They give you a hello world and then you have to figure out how the damn thing works.
Now I have to watch YouTube tutorials which will probably all use fucking Spring Boot and extra libraries. I just wanted a barebones example, is that too fucking hard?
EDIT: maybe I should take a break from this thing -
This lead is an asshole, I'm the only who gets shit. Even if other people have the same issue.
To me: "The purpose was to have it done now."
To others: "Well, at least you have it mostly done."7 -
Anyone here has any experience with buying shit from STMicroelectronics? Requested a fucking account like an hour ago and their shit confirmation email has not gotten to me yet.
Any other sites y'all would recommend for getting their shit? This bs is getting ridiculous...for a company whose fucking assets are worth billions to take this fucking long to send a confirmation email.
Fucking Adafruit took nada to send me the shit i wanted. Fucking hell man.4 -
All the youtubers ranting about adpocalypse, watchtime and such for weeks now..
And tbh i didn't really care. But for fucks sake the AI youtube uses to recommend videos indeed sucks!
You know back in the days, when you listened/watched part 1 of a playthrough and were just fine with the upcoming video because it was part 2, 3, 4 and so on of the series?
FUCK THIS. How about now that you saw part 1 of Scykohs "Pokemon Snap Playthrough", watch some random fucking shit of jacksepticeye?
FUCK YOU. THENKS.
I used to fall asleep and wake up with some chill ass gameplays on my tv. But now I fall asleep with using my remote to direct myself to the next part of the video and wake up to some random ass content nobody wants to watch.
FRIGGIN FIRSTWORLDPROBLEM I KNOW BUT IT SUCKS.1 -
unreal engine is soooo much fun! You set a reference pose for vr motion controllers and expect them to have positions relative to it, and also expect them to be right in front of you. Well, no, they go completly wonkers and get beautiful positon values of 23874 2387236 2032938 which is way out of the world. IN WHAT FKING UNIVERSE DOES THIS MAKE ANY SENCE?!
Just because I parented them to a a scene object way within my character?! WHAT THE FK I followed the nice tutorials. What is this BS and why is it so fked up!!!4 -
when you think you're done coding and can finally start writing...
So you guys have seen my Unreal Engine adventures. I have to use a plugin for it, on top of everything, to extract some data. I've been using this plugin since ages on another pc, but now I had to set it up from scratch since this is a new project, new models, etc.
There is a new version. If I use the new one, it will break the chain which is to follow.
The old version is so legacy that the guy who wrote it does not remember how to set it up.
After hours, and tons of hacks and outcommenting stuff (there is physics involved with which I do nothing), it finally starts doing something. Finally!
Although I'm slowly loosing my sanity in the process....
Even if it now records the data, I cannot say if this is good enough or if the poses are all wonky now.
And that is my masters thesis. Submission deadline is on monday. Ha.
Ironically, since the start of this thesis, I felt like this will either make me or break me. ;D So much fun... FK2 -
designer sent over a mockup that uses Illustrator's missing font color as button/brand color. why??3
-
This is something that I hadn't done or that directly impacted me, but that had an effect in my life several years after it happened.
It's one of those stories that you think "this only happens to others", and then someday you're the "others".
So when I was born, I was, naturally, registered on the health care system. My parents chose an uncommon name for me (uncommon in my country) so I think I wasn't registered by the time of my birth, but 4 months later when all the bureaucratic crap came to an end (long story short, the guy that was there when it started died and my parents had to wait 4 months for another person to be appointed). So, when my parents finally went to register me, apparently, for some reason, the computer took my name and assumed it was a male name. As I've said, my name is uncommon in my country, there're probably 3 or 4 people with the same name here in Portugal.
Why did the computer assume it was a male name AND why didn't nobody check that? Since my parents had to ask to government entities to let them name me that name, I'm assuming it wasn't in their db. So why did it assume male? Was it purposely programmed that, by default, all "newly-registered" names were to be male? Was it random? Who the hell knows.
And how did nobody check that, every time I went to take vaccines? I don't think anyone told my mom that everytime we went there that the data was wrong, otherwise the situation wouldn't have lasted for 14 years.
We only knew about that mishap when it was time I had to take vaccines specifically for women and that I wasn't being noticed of it even though a friend 1y younger than me had already taken hers.
I find this story amusing but now that I started thinking about how it came to life (no pun intended) I'm actually a bit pissed off about how they didn't think of uncommon names and that how that could affect their registry in the system. They could have - IDK - placed "undefined" in that field so that it would caught the register's attention.
Moral of the story: don't assume stuff :v1 -
Yeah ok. I went to bed extra early yesterday but i kept waking up at night and now i am tired anyways but thats ok. i have to go to work now but thats good. yeah this is great. now when the sun is up and i have to go to work, my body feels like it could sleep 10 hours straight but hey, i think this is just what i need right now before work.1
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Fuck this.. I have to tell you this annoying wtf..
Hi btw this is my first rant so pls dont blame me :)
I am working on an etl project for our company to connect data sources like netbase, similar web, etc. to alooma (a data pipeline).
Now I got the task to add another data source called BrightEdge to it.
All fine.
BUT WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK.. IT TAKES 3 MONTH TO GET AN ACCOUNT. AND U KNOW WHAT.. I DIDNT EVEN GET THE API CREDENTIALS. THIS IS MY FINAL PROJECT FOR MY TRAINING TO BECOME AN IT SPECIALIST.3 -
Using a web grid which has functionality like filtering, sorting etc but each of it uses a postback. There is no way to enable client side filtering unless you do it yourself using JavaScript and the best part is the same company has another grid which has the option of both client side and server side filtering just by setting a flag but this grid only runs in .net 4 framework.
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Even I know I'm bullshitting right now. But maybe (like never) I'll optimize this one day (like really really never)1
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Been meaning to rant about this for awhile. Currently in college and in this class we have to write BASH scripts which isn't ever that hard. Except for the fact that everything is checked against a pre-written script. FUCK I just wrote a complex script that does work but because it's not EXACT its coming back failed even tho it prints everything correct and works.
So now instead of fixing the script I'm back on DevRant wasting more time.1 -
After two weeks of struggling with Docker, I can confidently say, this is the worst shit I've ever worked with.
$ php bin/console make:migration
ERROR: php_network_getaddresses: getaddrinfo failed: Name or service not known
Well let's try again...
$ php bin/console make:migration
ERROR: Connection refused
Different error messages for the same commands?! FUCK YOU!!!9 -
This is not why I go to r/CozyPlaces AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA[and now imagine 4830 more A's]6
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Yes, this is exactly what we need. Allow big corporations to completely control the internet...
https://theguardian.com/technology/...8 -
So I'm working on a project with another developer and a frontend guy. Now the frontend guy has the lead as the other dev and I can only do our job based on his work. So he had 3 months to deliver us the first part BUT has rarely been in communication. When he does email he just says "designing concept "FOR 3 FUCKING MONTHS" Now we are 1 week before the project is due for delivery and he is saying that he will send us over the concept this FRIDAY!! 3days days before project is due.........................................................................................AAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHRBFKDBDKSJRUDISNCFKSORVEOFBFOWBFFKDKWNDB!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!2
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IDE: JetBrains IDEs with Material theme (Dracula)
Editor: VS Code
They are fast, amazing and beautiful while I write code.2 -
There are just those days where nothing seems to work. I am now 8 hours on an issue that was estimated for 3 hours and new issues pop up every time where its not even my fault. In one instance, I get the correct value back, the next time with exactly the same parameters I get a COMPLETELY different Value back which keeps crashing my code. Who coded this thing that it is so inconsistent. Starts to get REALLY annoying. ._.1
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The icing on this app release cake was piped this morning.
The clients released the app into the wild, without our knowledge, despite some rather large, glaring issues that are present.
As to why they thought it was a good idea, who knows?1 -
I give up! Been trying to solve this shit for a week and still failed:
Using Android Data Binding, two-way binding and when I compile I receive this error:
Unknown class: java.lang.String
It was working without issues before upgrading Android Studio.
Anyone has a clue how to solve this shit?
By the way I'm using Kotlin, on Java it doesn't produce errors, and I'm not going to convert my project to Java ...8 -
"Oh I knew they'd say that it's why I didn't get them to test it "
Did these words really just come out of your mouth? Who the fuck left you in charge of planning this shit?
Some team manager requested dev work it got approved and done standard. However they knew from the get go their team would rip it apart so when it came to the testing phase did he get his team to use it?
No he pulled fucking random people from other teams who don't use this feature at all in their day to day to test and sign it off.
Sod your vision mate. Our team just lost two months of work your team's productivity has dropped because you had a picture of how things should be but didn't want to be told no. And for a fucking valid reason your method is shit.
Don't think he'll be left in charge of a project anytime soon. -
Why the fuck does a freaking SD card reader for arduino needs a 3v and a 5v pin...... I have no space in my project and no experience at all to handle this.... and no fucking place for batteries....
Why is every of my project like this ..... cry12 -
How to make a shitty job, shittier... Having to fight to keep a wifi connection every single day, working on a remote windows system, on a POS laptop running an even more locked down windoze install than the freaking Dev VDI. Good Lord this is devastating...1
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What does this mean? I genuinely don't understand this job title. Is he doing his sales pitch in python or something?1
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Me : .. but sir without sass/js compiled, how can we address the issue?
Boss : that is not an issue, issue is with on approach we have taken?
You sick fuck, you take other developers un-finished work, expect me to finish it (which it did) and when the other developer is not smart enough to copy paste the solution, you give an "update" to me, I mean how the fuck, what ever..
I really really put efforts to make this shit happen, I know very little about your commerce cloud shit, but when you question my logic on basis of someone who will pay you to finish her work, it is very unethical and hard to swallow it down.
Maybe this is my first real job, that is why this is so hard, but I gotta do what I gotta do -
So I have a lease car through work, but I forgot my fuel pass one day and I needed to fill up the tank. Then I had to send a letter with the receipt to declare the costs to this address... Wondering how that's gonna go lol2
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"Stop using your useless keyboard shortcuts, use the mouse like everyone does" FUCK THIS SHIT @oscarascal5
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I am really being tested with my creativity in naming conventions with these two sites rn.
Site 1 is a blog for a place called "The Post", so literally everything is called .post
Site 2 is a development built out of shipping containers, where each container is a different features of the property... just like a container would wrap features in their app🤦♂️3 -
XSS mitigation is a pain in the ass.
After all this time, with all the brilliant developers around the world, why haven't we found a sane way to mitigate this shit by default?
Shit!8 -
It's Friday and I'm having one of those "how the fuck is this working?" moments. Caveat: it's my code. 😂😂😂2
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Just use a promise that sets this variable, and then you can use the variable as long as its after the promise declaration.
No, just no. Thats not now asynchronous code works.2 -
!dev
Man, Christmas isn't here yet, I already want it to end. I was planning on resting during this time, but I already know this will look like a drama tv show. I guess I'll spend Christmas alone for the first time of my life but I least I'll be at peace. -
So yesterday night, I went to sleep thinking of this unfinished task. I did wake up with an awesome solution in my head, but now as I reached office, I forgot the fucking solution and how I arrived to that stage. fml
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Currently working on the most frustrating Wordpress build I’ve ever worked on. The page template I’m trying to access isn’t in the page page-templates directory with all the others. I have no ability to upload via FTP as my permissions won’t allow it. The Wordpress editor has been disabled but I can’t see how. I also don’t have the ability to upload any plugins to help me at least find where this file is.
Fuck this shit. Fuck Mondays.4 -
https://wired.com/story/...
Although I can agree with a lot of things in this article, they say things like "geeky references and a competitive environment" prevent women from entering tech.
Common, of course theres gonna be competition, and women are totally capable of beating it. About geeky references, this is the field that makes most geeky references, women included2 -
Getting ready to finally launch a WordPress Multisite project I've been working on for over a year this weekend...and version 5.1 drops today.
And has significant additions in Multisite functionality that I should implement prior to launch while it's comparatively painless, rather than when we've got a bunch of sites with data to reconfigure.
Blah.2 -
Please how realistically, can you make $5k with programming skills per month?
What web application can a programmer build or ways can I do this ?
#SaveASoul25 -
Was working with my internship boss to implement an CI but the documentation were cryptic and no fucking support on the forum whatsoever.
So I started working on creating my own CI dubbed Blackjack CI and he posts this on the forum
https://discuss.circleci.com/t/...
But how fucking hard can it be to have fucking propped documation.2 -
Came across this comment on r/programminghorror/
> We're you talking with my co-worker? He's extremely abrasive, especially when it comes to anyone touching his code because "Now I don't know how it works anymore" -
I'm starting to grow fucking tired to fix bugs. I know this is a part of the development process, but shit, I've been doing this for two whole months now
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Just coded a simple SDL program after a two weeks break without a compiler error(more than 100 lines) from memory . Something must be missing . I don't trust this program 🤔2
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I wish I could get our technical lead fired for incompetence. No transparency about deadlines (it's always "Oh and we need it today"), always overpromises to business ("I told them you can deliver this in two days" - we estimated a week's worth of work), and she never documents anything except through email (she never uses Jira, which we use for our task logging - we end up creating the tickets ourselves, which she never reads or updates either when there are blockers she needs to address).
Dozens of retrospectives later trying to find a solution to her poor organizational skills have failed to produce anything remotely close to an answer. She just stubbornly refuses to change or improve. I'm at my wits' end just dealing with this on a daily basis to the point I can't wait to clock out and go home.
It's a Friday tomorrow. I intend to slack off and just put in a couple hours of work because fuck her and fuck this company and its inability to fix itself.1 -
I was about to go to bed, decided to open instagram and this angel is in the top of my feed. Amen 😇
I want to watch a movie where the actresses are:
- Miranda Kerr, Daniela Botero, Angelina Danilova and lizzydm (instagram - what's her full name?)7 -
So I'm assigned once again to fix a new someone else created and that seems to be the case whenever there's an issue...
Boss just assigns it to whoever is most likely to be able to investigate it... which is basically me. Other than the little time I can use to develop stuff, I'm usually cleaning up other people's messes.
And these other people are to busy working on new crap to properly explain how their existing code/processes/changes works.
And well the fact that anything breaks in production (that's not due to upstream one off issues) whoever does not think he needs to take responsibility for it.
So everyone else and especially me has to spend time understanding the shit they wrote and fixing it for them.
How do I tell my boss this nicely that we need clearly definitely ownership and whenever a component blows up in prod, the guy that wrote the code fixes it no matter what? Thereby incentivizing him to not write shit code in the first place and be more proactive in making sure it doesn't in the first place since he knows otherwise he's doing overtime to fix it?
Is it just me or is there really no such thing as a dev job where something doesn't blow up due to poorly tested and designed code every other day?3 -
Today i had a first experiente with Python. I'm finishing my course and I've done it with mainly Java. Now that I had this first class with python, I just feel like I've been trying to build a house with my bare hands this hole fuckin time!!3
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Started my internship last month. It's been alright although quite disappointing. I expected to be developing more but they have me doing website management using their CMS. I know it's needed for websites and all but is this really it?
Hope my workload picks up soon..3 -
I just hate it when Windows dies in obscure ways just when you need it.
This is why I use Linux most of the time, but hey, I thought it would be nice to finally play a game now that I've got a couple of days off. So because the big titles still don't want to support Linux, Windows was the only choice. Second day in, it won't log in to the system, rebooting to recovery mode is either excruciatingly slow or not working and I bet a virtual racoon died inside the Windows installation just for the hell of it.4 -
Well I'm back on this stupid project with this stupid Product Owner and I really hate this, it really demotivates me.
I was assigned to this project (data analytics) for like 6 months, working alone with this stupid PO that knows nothing about team management or project management.
The guy had a "methodology" where he established all task to be done daily and would not tell me what we have to do in the entire project but instead would tell me day by day all the tasks to be done in each day. This means that HE was the one making the time estimation which is plain wrong!.
Anyways, I talked to him and told him that I need to have a wide overview of the project in order to be able to make a good time estimation, and it kind of worked.
But the guy is a pain in the ass, calls me every 4 hours to "talk" about the project and texts me every hour to check "how are we doing?".
This project was killing me, I had no motivation to work on it, I hated every minute of it, I didn't like it at all to the point my boss (not him) talked to me and asked me what was wrong with me. I told him: This is not the project for me. He told me: Ok let's try to move you to another project.
After six months of agony, the project was stale (customer approval, paperwork, blah, blah) I was assigned to two other projects that I liked, more software architecture and development, not data analytics.
And last week my boss came back to me with "well, the project was approved so we need you back at it".
WHAT PART OF I'M NOT THE RIGHT GUY FOR THIS PROJECT DIDN'T YOU GET?
Now I'm again with this dude, calling me, texting me, sending me infinite emails, asking for minutely updates...
I really don't want to be working on this project. -
Fuck. I created a branch from beta instead of our production branch. This is why I always check my commits before pushing...2
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Sooo, I'm having a lecture now on JML (Java Markup Language), but it seems so retarded. Is this actually used anywhere? And if so, why?
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Brilliant rant from Redditor OK6502 in a thread about a "tech screen" being used to get free labor:
Usually when something like this uses the words complex tech stack it means you're going to have to deal with shitty server code distributed over a mix of Azure and AWS nodes and a lone Linux server running under someone's desk, an infuriating configuration hell with no safeguards for keeping dev and prod isolated, a hodge podge of different scripting languages (why not make scripts in pero that call power shell which then calls more perl? Should work right?) and random but critical shit checked into 3 different SVN, stuff stashed on people's shares that will never be checked even though you can't do your homework b without it, usually copied from someone else's share who left the company 3 years ago, no QA process to speak of (while claiming to be agile, somehow) and a front end that is maintained by one exhausted junior dev who inherited a mess of 20 different js frameworks that all load at the same time with every single click, somehow.
The full thread is really worth reading:
https://reddit.com/r/... -
Is anybody using Onesignal. It is free but their privacy statement is scary. Just read it and now I think I should stop using this service for my app.
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Me: let's focus on this aws developer - associate course and learn something new..
My Brain: hey look, Prince Harry just got engaged.. Let's read all about UK's monarchy!!!1