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I absolutely HATE "web developers" who call you in to fix their FooBar'd mess, yet can't stop themselves from dictating what you should and shouldn't do, especially when they have no idea what they're doing.
So I get called in to a job improving the performance of a Magento site (and let's just say I have no love for Magento for a number of reasons) because this "developer" enabled Redis and expected everything to be lightning fast. Maybe he thought "Redis" was the name of a magical sorcerer living in the server. A master conjurer capable of weaving mystical time-altering spells to inexplicably improve the performance. Who knows?
This guy claims he spent "months" trying to figure out why the website couldn't load faster than 7 seconds at best, and his employer is demanding a resolution so he stops losing conversions. I usually try to avoid Magento because of all the headaches that come with it, but I figured "sure, why not?" I mean, he built the website less than a year ago, so how bad can it really be? Well...let's see how fast you all can facepalm:
1.) The website was built brand new on Magento 1.9.2.4...what? I mean, if this were built a few years back, that would be a different story, but building a fresh Magento website in 2017 in 1.x? I asked him why he did that...his answer absolutely floored me: "because PHP 5.5 was the best choice at the time for speed and performance..." What?!
2.) The ONLY optimization done on the website was Redis cache being enabled. No merged CSS/JS, no use of a CDN, no image optimization, no gzip, no expires rules. Just Redis...
3.) Now to say the website was poorly coded was an understatement. This wasn't the worst coding I've seen, but it was far from acceptable. There was no organization whatsoever. Templates and skin assets are being called from across 12 different locations on the server, making tracking down and finding a snippet to fix downright annoying.
But not only that, the home page itself had 83 custom database queries to load the products on the page. He said this was so he could load products from several different categories and custom tables to show on the page. I asked him why he didn't just call a few join queries, and he had no idea what I was talking about.
4.) Almost every image on the website was a .PNG file, 2000x2000 px and lossless. The home page alone was 22MB just from images.
There were several other issues, but those 4 should be enough to paint a good picture. The client wanted this all done in a week for less than $500. We laughed. But we agreed on the price only because of a long relationship and because they have some referrals they got us in the door with. But we told them it would get done on our time, not theirs. So I copied the website to our server as a test bed and got to work.
After numerous hours of bug fixes, recoding queries, disabling Redis and opting for higher innodb cache (more on that later), image optimization, js/css/html combining, render-unblocking and minification, lazyloading images tweaking Magento to work with PHP7, installing OpCache and setting up basic htaccess optimizations, we smash the loading time down to 1.2 seconds total, and most of that time was for external JavaScript plugins deemed "necessary". Time to First Byte went from a staggering 2.2 seconds to about 45ms. Needless to say, we kicked its ass.
So I show their developer the changes and he's stunned. He says he'll tell the hosting provider create a new server set up to migrate the optimized site over and cut over to, because taking the live website down for maintenance for even an hour or two in the middle of the night is "unacceptable".
So trying to be cool about it, I tell him I'd be happy to configure the server to the exact specifications needed. He says "we can't do that". I look at him confused. "What do you mean we 'can't'?" He tells me that even though this is a dedicated server, the provider doesn't allow any access other than a jailed shell account and cPanel access. What?! This is a company averaging 3 million+ per year in revenue. Why don't they have an IT manager overseeing everything? Apparently for them, they're too cheap for that, so they went with a "managed dedicated server", "managed" apparently meaning "you only get to use it like a shared host".
So after countless phone calls arguing with the hosting provider, they agree to make our changes. Then the client's developer starts getting nasty out of nowhere. He says my optimizations are not acceptable because I'm not using Redis cache, and now the client is threatening to walk away without paying us.
So I guess the overall message from this rant is not so much about the situation, but the developer and countless others like him that are clueless, but try to speak from a position of authority.
If we as developers don't stop challenging each other in a measuring contest and learn to let go when we need help, we can get a lot more done and prevent losing clients. </rant>14 -
1. There are 10 types of people in the world: those who understand binary, and those who don't.
2. How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb?
None. It's a hardware problem.
3. A SEO couple had twins. For the first time they were happy with duplicate content.
4. Why is it that programmers always confuse Halloween with Christmas?
Because 31 OCT = 25 DEC
5. Why do they call it hyper text?
Too much JAVA.
6. Why was the JavaScript developer sad?
Because he didn't Node how to Express himself
7. In order to understand recursion you must first understand recursion.
8. Why do Java developers wear glasses? Because they can't C#
9. What do you call 8 hobbits?
A hobbyte
10. Why did the developer go broke?
Because he used up all his cache
11. Why did the geek add body { padding-top: 1000px; } to his Facebook profile?
He wanted to keep a low profile.
12. An SEO expert walks into a bar, bars, pub, tavern, public house, Irish pub, drinks, beer, alcohol
13. I would tell you a UDP joke, but you might not get it.
14. 8 bytes walk into a bar, the bartenders asks "What will it be?"
One of them says, "Make us a double."
15. Two bytes meet. The first byte asks, "Are you ill?"
The second byte replies, "No, just feeling a bit off."
16. These two strings walk into a bar and sit down. The bartender says, "So what'll it be?"
The first string says, "I think I'll have a beer quag fulk boorg jdk^CjfdLk jk3s d#f67howe%^U r89nvy~~owmc63^Dz x.xvcu"
"Please excuse my friend," the second string says, "He isn't null-terminated."
17. "Knock, knock. Who's there?"
very long pause...
"Java."
18. If you put a million monkeys on a million keyboards, one of them will eventually write a Java program. The rest of them will write Perl programs.
19. There's a band called 1023MB. They haven't had any gigs yet.
20. There are only two hard things in computer science: cache invalidation, naming things, and off-by-one errors.10 -
"Pre-Installed Malware Found On 5 Million Popular Android Phones"
"added somewhere along the supply chain"
See below how to check if it's installed
Sources:
- (new) https://thehackernews.com/2018/03/...
- (new) https://research.checkpoint.com/rot...
- (old relevant news) https://thehackernews.com/2017/03/...
---
"Rottensys" a malware which covers devices from: Honor, Huawei, Xiaomi, OPPO, Vivo, Samsung and GIONEE
---
"According to our findings, the RottenSys malware began propagating in September 2016. By March 12, 2018, 4,964,460 devices were infected by RottenSys," researchers said.
"At this moment, the massive malware campaign pushes an adware component to all infected devices that aggressively displays advertisements on the device’s home screen, as pop-up windows or full-screen ads to generate fraudulent ad-revenues."
---
If you have one of the affected devices, here's how I checked mine:
1. Install ADB (Windows: https://forum.xda-developers.com/sh...)
2. Connect your device in USB-debugging mode
3. execute "adb shell 'pm list packages -f' > output.txt" (On windows navigate to C:\adb and replace "adb" with ".\adb.exe")
4. open the now created output.txt
5. search for any of those:
com.android.yellowcalendarz (每日黄历)
com.changmi.launcher (畅米桌面)
com.android.services.securewifi (系统WIFI服务)
com.system.service.zdsgt
19 -
Three months into a new job, as a senior developer (12+ years experience) and updated an import application.
With one small update query that didn't account for a possible NULL value for a parameter, so it updated all 65 million records instead of the 15 that belonged to that user.
Took 3 people and 4 days to put all the data back to it's original state.
Went right back to using the old version of the apllication, still running 2 years later. It's spaghetti code from hell with sql jobs and multiple stored procedures creating dynamic SQL, but I'm never touching it again.5 -
Elon musk has shown himself to be a terrible person, a worse manager and someone who hasn't a clue of what a code review is. A summarily fires so many people that he can't find someone to open the doors for his big in person meeting or the vet the badges. He offers 3 months termination pay or you can work 12 hours a day 7 days a week hardcore. But none of the payroll people are around anymore either. Critical subsystems have not a single engineer left to work on them. He's paranoid that employees will sabotage the software. But I think he's doing such a good job it would be impossible to tell that anyone else was helping him.
An engineer wrote a prescient seven page report listing problems ahead including user verification. So Elon twit-fired him.
Also entirely predictable is the stress that the world cup will put on the system beginning today, I believe. He doesn't "like" microservices.
I work for the psychiatrist once who barely needed to sleep. Maybe Elon can function with 12-hour days week in week out. But it's cool to think you're going to squeeze substantially more work out of people by doubling their hours. More likely you will more than double their errors and what will that do to you budget? 50 years ago IBM determined that the best way to improve programmer productivity was to give each one their own office.
I can't believe he's whining over spending 13 million dollars a year on food. That is so far from being a strategic item. Soapbox out.28 -
the moment when you say fuck this functionality and let’s get rid of this 15 screens and replace them with simply point and click and they say but google did it like we wanted… Well google is valued trillion dollars and we are valued nothing. If you want this shit pay million to some developer so he would do one thing and deliver this…ok it’s not needed, fucking 12+ years making startups and delivering projects and still need to deal with morons who say google did it, yeah ask them to develop some functionality for you and fuck you too… I saved you year of work you morons and you fucking complain, dude you need to start selling your products and I want to enable it to you, if you don’t understand that shit then fuck you…3
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In the 90s most people had touched grass, but few touched a computer.
In the 2090s most people will have touched a computer, but not grass.
But at least we'll have fully sentient dildos armed with laser guns to mildly stimulate our mandatory attached cyber-clits, or alternatively annihilate thought criminals.
In other news my prime generator has exhaustively been checked against, all primes from 5 to 1 million. I used miller-rabin with k=40 to confirm the results.
The set the generator creates is the join of the quasi-lucas carmichael numbers, the carmichael numbers, and the primes. So after I generated a number I just had to treat those numbers as 'pollutants' and filter them out, which was dead simple.
Whats left after filtering, is strictly the primes.
I also tested it randomly on 50-55 bit primes, and it always returned true, but that range hasn't been fully tested so far because it takes 9-12 seconds per number at that point.
I was expecting maybe a few failures by my generator. So what I did was I wrote a function, genMillerTest(), and all it does is take some number n, returns the next prime after it (using my functions nextPrime() and isPrime()), and then tests it against miller-rabin. If miller returns false, then I add the result to a list. And then I check *those* results by hand (because miller can occasionally return false positives, though I'm not familiar enough with the math to know how often).
Well, imagine my surprise when I had zero false positives.
Which means either my code is generating the same exact set as miller (under some very large value of n), or the chance of miller (at k=40 tests) returning a false positive is vanishingly small.
My next steps should be to parallelize the checking process, and set up my other desktop to run those tests continuously.
Concurrently I should work on figuring out why my slowest primality tests (theres six of them, though I think I can eliminate two) are so slow and if I can better estimate or derive a pattern that allows faster results by better initialization of the variables used by these tests.
I already wrote some cases to output which tests most frequently succeeded (if any of them pass, then the number isn't prime), and therefore could cut short the primality test of a number. I rewrote the function to put those tests in order from most likely to least likely.
I'm also thinking that there may be some clues for faster computation in other bases, or perhaps in binary, or inspecting the patterns of values in the natural logs of non-primes versus primes. Or even looking into the *execution* time of numbers that successfully pass as prime versus ones that don't. Theres a bevy of possible approaches.
The entire process for the first 1_000_000 numbers, ran 1621.28 seconds, or just shy of a tenth of a second per test but I'm sure thats biased toward the head of the list.
If theres any other approach or ideas I may be overlooking, I wouldn't know where to begin.16 -
i was about to talk about golang - but it can wait.
snapchat's discover section is TERRIBLE. the amount of BULLSHIT, INCORRECT INFORMATION, AND PURE IDIOCY IS MAKING IT TERRIBLE.
now, usually, i rant about mashable when i say it's terrible. AT LEAST WHEN MASHABLE WROTE ABOUT THIS THEY WERE CORRECT. but no, alas, my faith in humanity is put to an all time end. a new evil has arose, by the name of "wired."
of course, and incredibly late to the party, a "tech" outlet wrote about bitcoin. the headline was "is bitcoin killing the planet?" IT HAS BEEN POSSIBLY THE STUPIDEST ARTICLE IVE READ OF ALL TIME. THEY CLEARLY HAVE NO IDEA ABOUT ANY SHIT THEYRE TALKING ABOUT.
let's take a look at the TWO facts they got wrong, and displayed to over a MILLION people.
now, instead of just GOOGLING TWO SIMPLE FACTS, THEY DECIDED TO JUST WRITE RANDOM SHIT.
ENOUGH WAITING - HERE THE THE TWO FACTS THEY GOT WRONG
picture 1: bitcoin up $900 in the last year? THE LAST MOTHER FUCKING, COCK SUCKING
.
.
.
YEAR?!?
WHY DO SUCH DUMBASSES HAVE ACCESS TO SOMETHING MILLIONS VIEW?
IT MAKES NO FUCKING SENSE
picture two: the actual fuck????
did i just read that?
b- bi- bitcoin will "run dry" BY 2032.
i think i finally figured it out.
these facts, they're literally just random number.
<thoughtBubble>
i can see it now:
wired employee 1: hey, guess what number im thinking of?
wired employee 2: 14?
wired employee 1: *screaming* BITCOIN WILL RUN DRY IN 14 YEARS
</thoughtBubble>
how do these people get hired. do they hire only hire 12 year old interns? im genuinely asking. does anyone know?
okay, end of rant. plz continue complaining about dumbasses who have power thru the media in tech8 -
Okay so I’ve been brought in on a 12 month contract as an external replacement integration architect, alongside a large IT consulting firm. Turns out, they don’t need an integration architect. So I fill my time coming up with useful tools around the project that deal with all the missing parts in their MVP: like monitoring tools, data mocking tools, you get the idea. Essentially doodling.
Client has woken up to fact that they’ve overspent by X million, employing 30+‘developers’, 20+ ‘testers’, n+ ‘managers’ on a ‘low-code’ project … result: project shuts 4 months early.
Q: Essentially client wants remaining four months work done in two weeks. Is there a German word for laughing, crying, and banging the forehead on the desk at the same time?
Supplementary: how cross will client be when they realise project can indeed be done, and that consultancy have been emperor’s-new-clothing them for most of the last two years?
(Feel free to perform substitution on quoted terms at your leisure)2 -
So I made a couple slight modifications to the formula in the previous post and got some pretty cool results.
The original post is here:
https://devrant.com/rants/5632235/...
The default transformation from p, to the new product (call it p2) leads to *very* large products (even for products of the first 100 primes).
Take for example
a = 6229, b = 10477, p = a*b = 65261233
While the new product the formula generates, has a factor tree that contains our factor (a), the product is huge.
How huge?
6489397687944607231601420206388875594346703505936926682969449167115933666916914363806993605...
and
So huge I put the whole number in a pastebin here:
https://pastebin.com/1bC5kqGH
Now, that number DOES contain our example factor 6229. I demonstrated that in the prior post.
But first, it's huge, 2972 digits long, and second, many of its factors are huge too.
Right from the get go I had hunch, and did (p2 mod p) and the result was surprisingly small, much closer to the original product. Then just to see what happens I subtracted this result from the original product.
The modification looks like this:
(p-(((abs(((((p)-(9**i)-9)+1))-((((9**i)-(p)-9)-2)))-p+1)-p)%p))
The result is '49856916'
Thats within the ballpark of our original product.
And then I factored it.
1, 2, 3, 4, 6, 12, 23, 29, 46, 58, 69, 87, 92, 116, 138, 174, 276, 348, 667, 1334, 2001, 2668, 4002, 6229, 8004, 12458, 18687, 24916, 37374, 74748, 143267, 180641, 286534, 361282, 429801, 541923, 573068, 722564, 859602, 1083846, 1719204, 2167692, 4154743, 8309486, 12464229, 16618972, 24928458, 49856916
Well damn. It's not a-smooth or b-smooth (where 'smoothness' is defined as 'all factors are beneath some number n')
but this is far more approachable than just factoring the original product.
It still requires a value of i equal to
i = floor(a/2)
But the results are actually factorable now if this works for other products.
I rewrote the script and tested on a couple million products and added decimal support, and I'm happy to report it works.
Script is posted here if you want to test it yourself:
https://pastebin.com/RNu1iiQ8
What I'll do next is probably add some basic factorization of trivial primes
(say the first 100), and then figure out the average number of factors in each derived product.
I'm also still working on getting to values of i < a/2, but only having sporadic success.
It also means *very* large numbers (either a subset of them or universally) with *lots* of factors may be reducible to unique products with just two non-trivial factors, but thats a big question mark for now.
@scor if you want to take a look.5 -
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After graduating with a degree in IT from Stanford University in the USA in May 2024, I began my job search, determined to build a successful career. I had been saving my student aid funds with a clear goal in mind, but the search was taking longer than expected. During this period, I met an HR representative from a company who seemed to be going through a tough time. He shared that he was unhappy with his job and even thought about quitting. He then introduced me to one of his friends, who he said was an investor. This friend mentioned an incredible business opportunity that seemed too good to ignore. According to him, there was a company based in Paris where you could invest $10,000 and earn $250,000 in just 12 days.At first, I was skeptical, but the promise of such high returns was tempting. After some thought, I decided to go ahead and invest. The investor shared a referral link to a platform, and without knowing much about it, I joined, eager for the financial gains that were promised. Unfortunately, just 10 days later, the platform disappeared. I quickly realized that I had fallen victim to a scam. The experience was devastating not just for me, but also for the HR representative and his friend, who had also invested in the platform. We all felt betrayed and unsure of what to do next.In my search for a solution, I came across an article online about Salvage Asset Recovery, a company that specialized in helping people recover lost investments. Desperate to get my money back, I decided to contact them. I shared all the details of my situation with their team, hoping they could offer a way out. They began working on my case, and I felt a glimmer of hope for the first time since the scam.To my relief, Salvage Asset Recovery was able to help all of us recover the funds we had lost, which totaled $1 million combined. Their team worked diligently to trace and reclaim our money, using their expertise and resources to track down the perpetrators. After several weeks of effort, we were able to get back every dollar that had been scammed from us. I am incredibly grateful for the professionalism and dedication of Salvage Asset Recovery, who turned our bad situation into a success story. Send a DM to Salvage Asset Recovery via below contact details.
WhatsApp-----.+ 1 8 4 7 6 5 4 7 0 9 6
Telegram-----@SalvageAsset
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USDT RECOVERY EXPERT YOU CAN TRUST HIRE ADWARE RECOVERY SPECIALIST
Two weeks after my birthday, I became a victim of a cryptocurrency scam that cost me over 5 million in my local currency. Most of the money I lost was a generous gift from friends and family from Europe and America. My intention was to multiply this money to secure funds for my son’s school fees, ensuring he had access to quality education. WhatsApp info: +12 (72332)—8343 Unfortunately, the experience turned out to be financially devastating and emotionally draining. I felt a profound sense of betrayal and helplessness, as the funds represented not just money, but the love and support of my loved ones.After realizing the extent of my loss, I promptly reported the crime to the authorities, hoping for a swift resolution. However, my frustration grew as I encountered a lack of results and communication. Website info: h t t p s:// adware recovery specialist. com
It felt like I was ensnared in a labyrinth with no exit, and the emotional toll was overwhelming. I was desperate for a solution and felt increasingly isolated in my struggle.I turned to friends for advice. One of them recommended a company called ADWARE RECOVERY SPECIALIST. I was hesitant; I had heard mixed reviews about recovery services and was concerned about falling victim to another scam. The fear of being duped again loomed large in my mind, but I decided to take a leap of faith after speaking with their team. Their professionalism and clarity regarding their recovery methods impressed me. ADWARE RECOVERY SPECIALIST was dedicated and responsive, providing regular updates on their progress. Email info: Adware recovery specialist @ auctioneer. net It was refreshing to collaborate with professionals who genuinely cared about my situation and were committed to helping me recover my lost funds. They took the time to elucidate the recovery process in detail, which helped alleviate some of my anxiety. Their transparency and willingness to address all my questions made me feel more secure in my decision to work with them. ADWARE RECOVERY SPECIALIST managed to recover most of my lost funds. This has imparted valuable lessons about the inherent risks associated with cryptocurrency investments and the importance of vigilance in the digital realm. I now understand the necessity for thorough research and caution when engaging in online transactions.If you find yourself in a similar predicament, I highly recommend reaching out to ADWARE RECOVERY SPECIALIST for assistance. They are true lifesavers, and their expertise can make a significant difference in your recovery journey. Don’t hesitate to seek help; you deserve to reclaim what you’ve lost.2

