"i need a break from all this coding--"

*orders delivery food online and as i go for a checkout, website gives a php error*

"why??????" 😭😭😭😭

Im hungry, bored, and cant find my desk

No work experience: I'm gonna be the best programmer in the world. My code is beautiful. This is my passion.

After 1-2 years experience: just f@#$!ng work pls so i can go home goddamit i hate my life im hungry f@$!% everyone.

As a senior dev with a house and a good salary im a bit afraid these young devs.

They are hungry, they are intelligent, they work hard, they want my comfort and my job!

I feel like im running naked through a forrest with a ham between my cheeks, chased by a pack of hungry wolves!

And im only 37...

Do you feel the same?

Co-employee in Slack: Let's get this bread

*1 hour later*

That guy: Bread has been acquired

Meanwhile me: *Forgot to eat breakfast and read the sentence wrong*

God I wish I was that guy

FUCK YOU MAGNETO!!!!!

what a backstabing cunt

imagine you're trying to prevent world war 3 from happening with someone you've been training for months.

out of nowhere, this FUCKING PICE OF SHIT decides to become a vilain.

in the midst of the event he tries to deflect a bullet that ricochets into my spine.
thanks asshole, now I can't walk

i thought we were friends man, we bonded over painful shit

like ok, they killed your mom and made experiments with you,

but it was just the NAZIS, LITERALLY EVERYBODY HATES THEM.
take it out on them, not the entire humanity bro

you unlocked your powers thanks to me, you couldn't even lift the toilet seat.

and you don't even give a fuck about mutants, you power hungry bitch

you only care about total domination

"oh no, someone save us from this mutant whose real name is eric"
im so scared right now

I have already done like 3 internships of 6 months now. And all the companies sucked!

Now the current company I work at is at least not a marketing company filled with cocaïne sniffing callcenter junkies. But why do they always lie so much. They promised free food and drinks and code reviews. What I get is a computer with an i5 and a fucking Jira account.

This is fucking annoying me, im hungry, thirsty and somebody should really check the code im about to push because it cant be good!!!

i hate you, you and you AHHHHHH

This doesnt have to make sense.
This is a freakin rant for god's sake, not a pull request. I'm not tryna be the best ranter?? Dont mind this rant. Just scroll. B if u can only hear my scream right now from the other side of the world, it sure can cause another big bang.

F u, this sht, (oh ya it's profanity, i got no better term for what im feelin, gahh please rip my head off) and that too, and this one too, all of u

I HATE ALL OF YOU. I BLAME ALL OF YOU FOR ALL MY INCONSISTENCIES. YE, IM TIRED OF TAKING ACCOUNTABILITY. F THAT SHT COZ IT JUST RAISES EXPECTATIONS. I CAN'T EVEN MEET THE DEADLINES I SET FOR MYSELF.

The hell are ambitions and all that "dream life" they tryna sell. Those won't even matter when I can barely get my sht together. UGH. I haven't even seen my friends, the SUN, trees and all normal people things. Dang, I want fried chicken. I haven't had one for a while. I guess I should end this rant here and order one.

I must just be hungry, no?

So I wanted to do a quick test before going to dinner and now I'm stuck on waiting for this f*cking cloud provider to start my container.

"Provisioning 20 minutes" WHAT THE HELL!? After 20 (TWENTY) minutes my container still hasn't started!?

Is it a joke? Is some sysadmin spying on me and making me wait on purpose? What the f*

My stomach is fucking me up every time i come to office to work. It is growling & growling & growling & growling & on & on on non FUCKING stop. FUCKING, STOP!!!! YOU PIECE OF FUCKING DHIT STOMACH. I CAN'T FOCUS ON WORKING. GET SO EMBARRASSED AMONG THESE 2 GIRLS IN MY OFFICE WITJ MY DIPSHIT STOMACH GROWWWLIINGGG. THEY MUST THINK IM SO POOR AS FUCK THAT I CANT AFFORD FOOD. AND WORST THING IS -- IM NOT EVEN HUNGRY!!!!! ITS GROWLING OUT OF BOREDOM AND I CAN'T CONTROL IT. I DONT WANT TO EAT, I HAVE TO WSTCH MY DIET AND NOT BE FAT ASSS GOOFBALL. HOW DO I STOP THIS PIECE OF FUCK TO STOP. FUCKING. GROWWLINGGG

The stress that hit me unprepared on june 9th was of such large magnitude that i just realized i havent eaten anything yesterday for the whole day. I also can't eat anything today. And most likely i wont be able to eat anything for the next several days. I tried eating by force but then i have a compulsion of puking, so i can't eat even forcefully. Just woke up with nightmares dreaming the stress that just happened to me on 9th june. And as soon as i woke up my head is decomposing of pain. Very large headache of exhaustion and stress. Can't even fucking have peace in the fucking dreams while sleeping. It's day 2 and I dont even feel like im hungry. it feels like this latest stress has deformed something in my organism either physically or mentally. What would happen if i dont eat for the next 5-7 days, can i survive? I feel no hunger at all so i can't tell if i should eat or not. I can only drink water as a replacement of eating food

I just realized being alive in this life is actually a punishment. Who enjoys this life if they are not rich? Wtf.

I have to spend thousands of dollars for my dogs treatment because hes sick. Those greedy vets are fucking disgusting. I dont have energy to talk about how money hungry they are and not actually helping.

Literally giving away my last dollars to help my dog. These doctors don't give a Fuck if hes gonna survive they are here just to milk as much money as they can from me. Im fuckijg sick of this life and world. I didnt sign up for this struggle.