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Search - "impatience"
Alright, so you are a dishwasher and you do your job just fine.
And great news, the restaurant you work in is becoming THE restaurant in town.
To handle the volume you need to clean each dish within 30 seconds.
The pressure causes you to clean only the dishes that are easy to clean. Soup bowls come before ramekins with half-eaten Crème brûlée. This works for a while but it's self-defeating because not everyone is going to order soup and there is a growing shortage of clean "hard" dishes because you can only scrub so many of them to keep the chefs supplied. Eventually you are moving about 70% of the dishes in inventory at any given time and rarely used dishes have to sit filthy with their contents caking on until they are needed.
But Good news! Meet Jeb. He's the new dishwasher here to help. Efficiency! Except you have to stop and explain which dishes are easy and why they should come first. You have to share the sink, so you get a good helping of Jeb's rants about how things should have never gotten to this state and how nice the faucet was at the sink at the other restaurant.
In the interests of not making a scene in the kitchen and in front of any customers looking in, you smile and feed him a line of bullshit about how you understand and appreciate his thoughtful feedback. You'd rather just walk away and let him learn why being right doesn't buy him anything, but then you'd just be reprimanded. You and Jeb clean more and more until your moods match at a dead zone of benign acceptance thinly disguising your cynicism.
Still, part of you DOES understand Jeb. This SHOULD be simple. You pick a dish up, you scrub it until it's clean, and then you dry it. If only you could do that. If only the boss knew how hard you have to fight to do your job.
You privately go back and think about how much better things would be with some adjustments. Like, another sink. A dedicated dryer, be it person or a machine. Things that require investment, sure, but would more than make up for the value lost. You then remember that doing your job more efficiently would only bring more volume to perpetuate the cycle, assuming that you can even justify interruptions or reduced dish output to your boss.
You know that the root cause of your rush is really the customer's impatience and the business' fear of losing customers to a more convenient competitor, but that's not your job to fix. You are a dishwasher. You aren't here for the politics, you are here to wash dishes. But still you stew in a dance of wanting the power to fix what is broken while knowing you have no power to fix the most stubborn force on Earth: people.
You here a chef yell out that he needs 4 plates NOW (and not with spots on them this time, dammit), and you briefly fantasize about staring blankly into space, walking stiffly into a corner, dropping your pants, bending over, rumbling your butt cheeks, and blasting a thundershit like a 6-gauge all over the sink, the chefs, the food, fucking Jeb, and the customer body at large.
It didn't matter if you acted like a four-year old on amphetamines. The news would repeat your name for years as the dishwasher that wouldn't stand for the human condition as it stood, because the world needs to know that EVERY dishwasher's, no, EVERY WORKER's job would be simpler if it weren't for impatient consumers. And then things would change.
Pffffft lol. You laugh off your fantasy as the naive and selfish daydream that it is, then pick up the next soup bowl.
Now imagine everyone thinking this way, the dishes are invisible, the sink bowls are made of cracked cement, and the big customers will panic and attempt to raid the kitchen if they stop seeing food come out of the kitchen the instant they ask for it. And the boss asks you about your status every day while promising that you'll have time to clean the hard dishes one day.
This is Enterprise-level Software Engineering.3
[Little perspective: For the last 7 months I'm working in a certain project.]
[The project is full of unimaginative, non-creative devs with 0 initiative and poor technical background.]
[And they're almost all from one country which you all can figure out.]
[But I'm not going to mention it here because I don't want to come up as a racist]
[So there's US (Europeans) and THEM. 3 of US and about 10 of THEM. And we're doing 90% of all the heavy lifting]
D (Dev from THEM): Hi S, I have a problem with my task
Me: (sighing) Ok let's have a call
* on the call with D we were checking some stuff loosely related to task *
* code wouldn't get invoked at all for some reason *
* suddenly I realize that even if the code would invoke, D's probably doing everything wrong in it anyway *
Me (thinking): I need to double check something.
Me: I can't help you now, I'll get back to you later.
* call ended *
Me: Hey J, I need your help, I need to clarify the work package in my mind, because I am no longer sure.
J (my European TL): Ok, fire away.
* call started *
Me: Is it true that [blahblahblah] and so D's task depends on me completing first my task, or am I losing my mind?
J: That is correct.
Me: Well she's trying to do this in [that] way, which is completely wrong.
J: You see, that's how it is in this project, you do refinements with them, split these work packages to tasks, mention specifically what depends on what and what order should things be taken in, and in some cases all tasks from given user stories should be done by one person entirely... But they do it their way anyway, assign different people to different interdependent tasks, and these people don't even understand the big picture and they try to do the things the way they think they understand them.
Me: It's a fire in a brothel.
Me: I fucking love this project.
J: (smiling silently)
* call ended *
Me: Ok D, you can't do your task because it's dependant on my task.
D: Oh... so what do I do?
Me: I don't know, do something else until I do my task.
A (THEIR TL) (Oh, did I forget to mention that there are 2 TLs in this project? THEY have their own. And there are 2 PMs as well.)
A: Hey S, I need to talk
Me: (sighing, getting distracted from work again) Ok let's have a call
* call started *
A: S, we need this entire work package done by Friday EOD.
Me: I can't promise, especially since there are several people working on its several tasks.
A: D's working on hers for 3 days already, and she's stuck. We want you to take over.
Me: (sighing, thinking "great"): Ok.
* call ended *
Me: Hey D, A instructed me to take over your task. This is actually going to be easier since you'd have to wait for mine after all.
D: Oh, ok.
* I switched the Assigned Person on D's task to myself on Azure *
This morning, email from D.
"Hey, I completed my task and it's on [this] branch, what do I do now?"
Me, hesitating between 2 ways to reply:
(and take note there are people in CC: A, J, P - the last one is THEIR PM)
1) "Hi, Unfortunately you'd still have to wait for my changes because your task is dependent on my task - the column to be changed is in the table that I am introducing and it's not merged to develop branch yet. By the way I already did your task locally, as I was instructed to do it, I'm wrapping things up now."
(y'know: the response which is kind, professional, understanding; without a slight bit of impatience)
2) WHAT FUCKING PART OF "DON'T DO THIS I WILL FUCKING DO IT MYSELF GO HOME JUST GO HOME" YOU DON'T FUCKING UNDERSTAND4
I feel like this is my first actual rant in that it's a monologue possibly showcasing my emotional baggage. No TL;DRs, so grab a coffee and enjoy.
Hey entrepreneurs and people who write about entrepreneurs, can you stop glorifying life-ending risk and workaholism? It's unhealthy and it goes to ridiculous lengths.
Going on about how you maxed out all of your credit cards, nearly lost your marriage, and still ended up rich should not be seen as inspiring. Impressive, sure, but not inspiring. In a fair world, your story should be seen as part of the self-congratulatory silicon valley gold rush culture where people actually believe that lottery tickets and following their own destiny should involve putting up their chance to ever find peace as collateral.
If you made it with hard work and at great risk, then fantastic! I'm still happy for you. I just wish your success didn't buy you the credibility that it does, because you still didn't discover a formula for success or life in general. You took a plunge and survived, which is fun to watch! It's like seeing someone skydive without a chute onto an unclaimed island and keeping that island. I'm just saying that if your story makes a whole bunch of people start skydiving without chutes because they think they'll land on their own island, then we went from hearing an amazing story to everyone just being retarded.
I'll avoid throwing the baby out with the bathwater: If you want financial health and a sense that you are not letting life pass you by, definitely maintain that course and accept risks along the way. Just be reasonable about risk!
I saw an article that started by saying "To start and support your own business, you’ll have to put your career, personal finances and even your mental health at stake." ...Yeah, maybe if you want exponential growth in 5 years because of some kind of cosmic terminal impatience or dysfunctional belief that your moral worth as a person equals the rewards you shoot for.
For people like me who are okay with using a steady paycheck to feed conservative growth and gigs for side income, putting all personal finances and mental health at stake is not an inferior life choice. I strive for flexibility in the event I lose income, and to me the ability to adapt and achieve financial independence is far more valuable than entering into all-or-nothing arrangements in the startup lottery. I won't be filthy rich or stupid famous, but that's okay. I don't need to be.
To those of you on the fence about entrepreneurship, my advice is not to focus on getting rich or famous or even feel the pressure to do so. And it's definitely not to take more risk than necessary. Ask real questions about what lifestyle would make you happy. If it's having a 9000 foot square house, a pool and worldwide admiration, then fine, make the leap. But if you think you're SUPPOSED to have the huge house and worldwide admiration, then I'm telling you that you don't. You are just as important and valuable as a person even while millions salivate over Elon Musk and walk around with inflated aspirations.
And if it helps, good budgeting, wise investments and careful risk management can still get you ahead on lower salaries. Someone making $30k a year but is cautious about savings and staying out of debt can end up just as free and flexible as someone making and blowing $800k a year on luxuries. As for acceptance, having just one person love you for the impact you make on their life is infinitely better than having millions adore you for the (possibly bullshit) image and dream you are forever expected to show them.
To close this out, I'll speak back to the entrepreneurs out there again again: I'm not judging you for making your own life choices. I AM judging your shitty, egotistical need to showcase how great you are for your success when what you did would probably bankrupt the next person to try the exact same thing. And I'm DEFINITELY judging telling people that working 100+ hours a week or risking everything is a necessary part of making dreams come true.
Entrepreneurship is great. Entrepreneurs are full of shit.28
Basically out of laziness, and impatience, though.
Still, go me.4
Ok, so I basically spent my weekend trying to work out why the fuck my python docker container would not connect to my mariadb docker container. Tried fucking everything, bridged network, host network, links (even though theyre deprecated), you name it. It would NOT WORK!
In my despair I finally turned to StackOverflow. There I was told 5min after posting the question that the reason was probably that mysql is a quite heavy service, which takes a bit to start up.
I thought to myself "Oh, get the fuck outta here, that can't be it, shit's way too easy to work!"
I tried it nevertheless by adding a 10sec delay before querying the database AND THE MOTHERFUCKING PIECE OF SHIT ACTUALLY WORKS!! So, I essentially just lost a weekend because I was too impatient... I think I'm gonna punch some trees now.4
Anyone else here with anxieties, depression or what-not? I feel this could get heavy, but I feel this is the only place I could write this. So...
My 18-month-long programming course is slowly coming to an end. Time has come for us to be sent out to job interviews at various companies.
Every single time an interview comes up, I feel the exact same mix of my inconfidence, constant anxiety, "I'm gonna throw up", impatience and whatever else is there in my head. I figured it would get easier with each consecutive interview but it hasn't.
The questions they ask make me sick. The atmosphere is unfathomable. Robots are more humane.
- Why do you want to work with us?
I need money for my meds and something to down them with? I willingly put myself through this shit to become a corporate slave, what else is there to say? I can only hope I'll be writing any code here.
- Where do you see yourself in 2-3 years?
Far away from anything remotely related to an HR department of any sort?
- Had you been a fruit, which one would you be? Whatever would come out of my tears blended with semen? What the fuck is even that question?
Of course those aren't my actual responses, but conjuring the IRL ones to finish the process is a serious burden. And those are only some HR ones. After this barrage of questions they want my lifeless, flaccid body to write code. I mean ok, it's a software dev gig, but I already gave all I had on self-clairvoyance.
We'll be in touch!
Is there a strategy you guys have when you go to an interview? Any tips for taming the acrid beast running around in your brain? Is it too much to talk with a human in a humane language without "15 buzzwords to make the recruiter moist"?5
I remember the first time I had a code block, I sat on my desk for up to 18 hours trying to fix it. In the end realizing that my impatience is not helping me. It was all in vain. A tired mind did not help.
I finally came to realise that I was lacking on knowledge and a tired brain did not help. I did it the next day but learnt a huge lesson. When it's just not your day, it's not you day. A fresh mind will help next day. Relax, do anything apart from code.
Too much of code can drain you of ideas and smartness. You need to let your mind breathe. Life away from the PC is important too.
If I had to name one of my weaknesses it would definitely be impatience.
When I'm working on a backlog issue I want it to be done, finished, pronto. In the real world that's ofcourse not always the case, I can't disturb my colleagues with every question or ask for feedback every minute. I also hate it to have to wait for someone else to do something for me if it's blocking me, like when I need to fix something on a server but don't have access or when I somehow don't have permission for something and have to wait for someone to come and fix it. Even worse: Slow programs that fuck me up when I _just a second ago_ figured out how to fix a bug or implement something.
I also have to wait for pull request reviews so I usually end up with a bunch of stacked PRs that all feature small changes but are dependent upon each other because I needed a change for a different change, never more than 2-level stacks though!
Obviously it's a bit childish to lack professional patience, but it's definitely something that I wanted to rant about and think I should grow in.
On one side I fucking hate waiting for the internet technician. I would've liked to go to work (especially as there is an event right now) and not sit here during "That-5-hour-window-because-scheduling-isn't-a-thing-the-german-Telekom-will-tell-you-about" and nurse my impatience.
On the other side, I have idle time and I like programming when everything's quiet in the house and only the heating and my PC cooling system are whirring quietly, so I've got that going for me which is nice.
Only too bad there's no internet right now.4
I hate when people say "thank you for your patience" because then I feel socially obligated to be patient when I really don't want to be 😠2
Just review and merge my PR already!!!
Damn is it frustrating to see PRs stagnating after finally finding an open source project I can actually bring something useful to :(4
When the client gets pissed that it looks like there is no progress on their site but everything has been back-end work and front-end is only 20%.
Then they demand a refund on a holiday... in 2014... and their domain is STILL a parked page even though they were 5 days from completion in 2014.
AI boffins. Get a move on with this conversational UI stuff. Typing is getting old now.
Then two years later, when I'm bored of that, I want to just *think* the text onto the screen.
Leave mention here when ready.
Into a bunch of open source hogging meat heads because no one likes paying for things their own peers toil days and nights creating and creating more under documented over expensive licensed stuff (because agile) while throwing buzzwords to clients just make business while simultaneously choking the life out of underpaid overworked devs and engineers with the skill of running away from responsibility trying to save their own skin with the inept ability to look like a hero/King at the end of the day with a single mail sent with psychic communication or the lack thereof with people who are slogging their asses off to fix a problem created to the vulnerabilities and bugs introduced due to the impatience of the same moron who couldn't afford to give his employees/subordinates more time to figure out an elegant solution to a non existent problem created in the confusion of improperly documenting unnecessary requirements of an ignorant or unknowing client who is way too eager to process way too much load with way too less resources all the while whining about lack of features theyre not gonna use.3
Update on the ACPI booting error - i attempted to install antergos onto the SWAP partition (to try to rescue my files and then reinstall antergos) which was 8gb, which is too small to install antergos, a DE, and the bootloader. i wiped everything. Impatience is a bitch. why am i like this.
i also decided on using xfce rather than kde - i feel like it runs faster. I can get the kde WM right? i miss my wobbly windows