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Search - "oh snap"
WHY THE FUCKIDY FUCK DO PEOPLE THINK THAT JUST BECAUSE YOU ARE A DEVELOPER THEN YOU CAN DO EVERY FUCKING THING IN A SNAP?!
THIS ENTIRE SUMMER I WORKED FOR THIS MIDGET OF A FUCK AND THE IDEA WAS TO MAINLY DEVELOP AN IOS APP FOR THEIR PRODUCT. THAT ONE APP TRANSLATED TO THREE SEPARATE APPS AND KEEP IN MIND THAT I AM THE ONLY DEVELOPER THEY HAVE SO I HAVE TO DEVELOP IT, TEST IT AND DOCUMENT IT!! AND WHAT'S EVEN WORSE IS HE KEEPS GIVING ME DESIGNS AT THE LAST MINUTE SO I ALWAYS END UP HAVING TO CREATE NEW PROJECTS ALL THE TIME. WHEN A WEEK PASSES BY WITHOUT ANY UPDATE HE AND HIS FUCKED UP BRAIN CELLS GATHER A MEETING WITH HIS 'DONALD TRUMP HANDS-SIZED' BALLS TO ASK ME, 'WHY ARE YOU TAKING SO LONG? THESE ARE JUST THREE BUTTONS ON THIS VIEW?' MOTHERFUCKING COCKSUCKER!! GO GET YOUR MOM TO DO THIS WORK THEN IF IT'S JUST THREE BUTTONS. TO HIM EVERYTHING IN IOS WHICH INCORPORATES A TAP IS A FUCKING BUTTON! BUTTON THIS! BUTTON THAT! AND IT'S NOT LIKE HE HAS SIMPLE DESIGNS..NO.NO.NO.NO. THIS ASSHOLE-SHAPED-HEAD MUGGET DESIGNS SHIT WHICH REQUIRES ME TO HAVE TO DRAW A UIVIEW AS THE SHAPE OF A HUMAN BODY AND HEART. THEN ASIDE FROM THAT, JUST BECAUSE MY RESUME SAYS I MINORED IN MATH AND APPLIED MATH, HE SENDS ME A PAPER THAT EXPLAINS MATHEMATICAL CONCEPTS OF DATA ANALYSIS THEN WANTS TO MEET WITH ME TO DISCUSS THE SUGGESTED METHODS THEN IMPLEMENT THEM. AT THIS POINT I HAD ALREADY IMPLEMENTED AN ALGO FOR COUNTING THE NUMBER OF STEPS THAT WAS WAY WAY WAY MORE ACCURATE THAN THE SHIT THEY HAD IN THEIR CONTROLLER..
SO AS I AM ABOUT TO FINISH IMPLEMENTING JUST THE INITIAL 5 VIEWS OF THIS 'FINAL' APP, HE SERIOUSLY WALKS IN AND TELLS ME, SO I'M STARTING TO WORRY THAT WE'LL NOT MEET THE AUGUST DEADLINE SO I'M THINKING MAYBE YOU SHOULD START SWITCHING BETWEEN DEVELOPMENT. WORK ON IOS FOR 4 HOURS THEN SWITCH TO ANDROID FOR THE REMAINDER OF THE TIME. OH AND UHH IF YOU FEEL LIKE TAKING THE IMAC WITH YOU TO WORK FROM HOME, THAT'S FINE AS WELL AND I'LL BE AVAILABLE IN THE WEEKENDS AS WELL. IT WAS AT THIS MOMENT THAT I REALLY REALLY HOPED I WERE GAY! LIKE 'NO LUBE' STYLE KINDA GAY!! OH BTW AT SOME POINT HE HAD ME PROGRAM ONE OF THEIR CONTROLLERS, AND WAS ASKING IF I COULD START RESEARCHING MEANS OF WRITING AN SDK FOR THEM.
KEEP IN MIND THAT I'M AN INTERN WITH ONE YEAR IOS DEV EXPERIENCE.. THEN HE WANTS ME TO ENTIRELY START LEARNING ANDROID AND GIVE HIM TWO VERSIONS OF THIS THIRD APP IN TWO WEEKS.
HE CAN GO SUCK HIS OWN DICK WHILE GETTING FINGER FUCKED BY A FORK WITH A BLUE WHALE'S 6FT LONG DICK UP HIS MOUTH.
*** that felt good ****36
Heroku: "You've used up your 550 free ours"
Me: "oh snap"
If your IDE found
and 47 warns
would you correct them
or let them slip.
His palms are sweaty
Knees weak, arms are heavy
The tests are failing already
But at his laptop he looks calm and ready
To squash bugs
But he keeps on forgetting
What he wrote down, the whole team goes so loud
He opens his file, but the code won't come out
He's chokin', how, everybody's jokin' now
The deadline run out, times up, over, blaow!
Snap back to reality, oh there goes file integrity
Oh, there goes documentation, he choked
He's so mad, but he won't give up that easy? No
He won't have it, he knows his whole header's code
It don't matter, he's dope, he knows that, but he's broke
He's so stacked that he knows, when he goes back to his mobile home, that's when its
Back to the office again yo, this whole rhapsody
He better go capture this moment and hope it don't pass him
Note: All credits to the original owners of these phrases.5
That moment when my boss and I were having a conversation (2 weeks into my new job) and she tells me her daughters name is "Amber" and I jump up with, "oh snap!! That's my dogs name too!!" 😑4
Hey, Microsoft! I refuse to spend hundreds or thousands of dollars to upgrade all 4 of the systems in my house running Windows 10 just to get a new coat of paint and features I WILL NEVER USE.
- Start menu in center. Who cares?
- New snap assistant controls. I don't use the old ones
- New Microsoft Store. I don't use the old one
- Widgets and Teams on the taskbar. I don't use Teams and I hate widgets. Waste of CPU and screen space.
- One big update a year. Great. Now you will add even more bugs and break more things with each update
- Rounded corners. Oh, please. Afraid we are going to cut ourselves on the square one or have you hired a Pierson's Puppeteer as a design specialist?
- Virtual desktops. Which I hardly use but, hey, you've finally gotten around to catching up to Linux and OSX and now allow different wallpapers!
For the love of all that is digital, can you please just make a fucking operating system and make all of the frills optional?18
The latest version of Chrome and Brave on OSX are throwing Aw, Snap! messages on pages like Gmail when left alone for several minutes.
So in 3D printing community prusa is just the best printer there is for the money. I cant argue with that.
But they are making their own filament. Prusament.
And all my friends with 3D printers are using it and saying how amazing it is and all.
So i bought 3kg of it just it was cheap at the moment. I bought only 1 type which was mistake from my side but oh well. (Galaxy black if you are wondering).
Started printing it. Nothing sticks to bed. Huh weird. Cleaned it. Nothing. Huh. Releveled. Nothing. Well shite this is not good.
By some fucking magic all the prints started sticking after second print. Nothing changed BTW.
It looks amazing when printed i must give it that. But i printed upgrade for my printer and there is a little stress on the part as can be expected. I thighten it and it literally snaps in half on me in the layers. WTFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF.
So i did a test. Printed 100% full cylinder. I could snap it in hands and the layer adhesion is basically shit for a PLA.
I tried printing higher temp (I used 215 normally) and still the same issue.
IDK if its just this specific filament type or all the colors are like that (I will buy different type as it still produces amazing prints that look amazing) and i will see if its any better but i had to use creality filament to get parts that actually dont snap in half on me.
Go to meetups and talk to people. Give presentations at meetups if you can. Get involved in community projects. Love coding. Use your downtime to study new stuff.
When talking to potential employers be positive and enthusiastic about your technology.
EDIT: Oh, a few more. Don't seem desperate for a job. Without saying anything, potential employers should feel like you have other offers and they're being evaluated by you. Ask questions about their company if you get an interview.
Try to give off an air of being in control and having a number of choices in your carreer (even if you're living off ramen every day).
The pressure should be on companies to hurry up and snap you up before another company does.
Be honest but a little spin won't hurt.
Random guy messages me on WhatsApp that he needs help, that his friend told him I'm good at blah blah blah.........
the issue: he paid for some random php bitcoin thingy blah blah, sent me a link to the site, pretty straightforward instructions on how to use it. I explained everything to him and he says he wants to tweak the php script before he puts it out.
me: then do it
him: how do I start?
me(in my head): did you not think of this before paying for the script?!
also me: oh well, download xampp, good for beginners, easy to setup.
him: not working! please help me
I knew from the onset that he was a windows user.
he started by running it without admin privileges
I had no idea and kept solving problems that didn't exist until I asked him to snap the log, after explaining how to run a software as administrator, we Solved it
port 80 was taken. had to go through the process of changing the ports, I had to validate every single change.
going through the procedure of reinstalling because he installed to some crappy directory. after all the headaches and then redoing all the processes stated above, it still doesn't work.
one final solution left and I am dropping him like a hot potato. I must have close to a hundred pictures of someone's screen on my phone.
little question: when he types localhost on his browser windows IIS page thingy pops up. I was thinking of changing the server name to localserver: new port address6
everytime when i meet with my friends and they ask me if what course i'm currently taking and of course i'm gonna answer back "IT"
(~) what i say in my mind
statements that will suddenly pop into conversation
-"can you (reformat, fix, update, etc.) my pc/laptop"
~oh stahp it, youuu
-"don't forget to treat us when you graduate, i heard jobs in your field have great salaries"
~gezzus i'm still a student and i am struggling, then you want me to treat you.
-"hey man, can you build me a website (for free)"
~yea dude, let me ask genie to snap that wish of yours
-"oh so you must be good with computers?"
~yea i treat them well, i tell them bedtime stories and feed them with milk and cookies
~the long silence makes this even more awkward
-"hey man, i code and design too, maybe we can work together"
-"how many coffee?"
~i truly found my mate.
these are some of the statements i've encountered, what's yours?