God bless codacy

This is the truth.

In salesforce, the baseclass of "Object" is SObject and the baseclass of an apex class is object.
Whoever named this smoked too much.

we're doomed!

Boss: I have really bad new
Me: What?
Boss: ....
Boss ... we have to clean your room tomorrow and remove all the Stallman posters, because marketing wants to film shit. But dont worry, we put them right up again when they are done

Spotify premium ad: "Subscribe to Spotify premium and you can skip any number of songs you want. We won't take it personally."

Actually you do!
What I skip and what I listen through tells your machine learning what I like and what not. That's how it builds my listening profile.
So your (software's) opinion of me directly depends on what and how much I skip.
(I expect that skips from people skipping often to have less value than from seldom skippers.)

That sounds like the definition of "taking it personally"!

Devrant algorithm on point......

Every language that has static_cast<T>(x) is bullshit

As to the request of two devRanters, I just did https://systemof.thedown.website

On my way to south Germany in the car and was bored and I've got two ssh clients on my phone ;P

Credits for the idea: @Codex404 and @xorith

Legends say, the God himself came down to code this up to guide mankind to truth.

Holy fucking shit. I just went to my first Java class at uni (3 1/2 hour long one at that) and I havent felt so damn irritated in a while.

Some background:
So first, I only had about an hour of sleep last night and a full day of work before this class so I was more cranky than normal.
Theres only 7 students in the class, 6 others plus me. I am the only one with any resemblence of programming experience. The teacher also claims to be a linux developer.
This is a three part course series. Java 1, 2, and 3. All taught by the same teacher.

The fuckery:
-teacher spends 48 minutes talking about text editors. Not even IDEs. Just talking in depth as fuck about notepad (notepad. Not notepad++ )and atom and textpad. Those three only though, nothing on vim or emacs or ACTUAL IDEs. 48 minutes.
- I briefly mentioned learning node.js on the side and am now the "javascript girl" to my teacher. I'm probably less experienced with js than any other thing i ever practised or studied.
-professor saw linux on laptop and asked what distro. When I said arch he said "oh no you shouldnt be using that Its not really for beginners" ... Uhh what makes you think I'm a beginner to linux? Or does he not think I should be using arch while learning java? Either way its really ridiculous and irritates me that he would discourage anyone from using any software/OS/anything, regardless of what it is or skill level.
-teacher moved a bunch of content out of the course because theyre either "concepts that are never implemented anymore" or "arent critical to know to master the language". These particular topics that were removed? Multi-dimensional arrays, scopes, and exception handling. EXCEPTION HANDLING.
-he writes a hello world program and displays it on the board, proof of it working and everything. He tells the class to write the same program, compile and run it. Never did I guess we would spend the remaining hour and ten minutes of class struggling with fucking hello world programs. Especially when the correct code is on the fucking projector.

And I get it guys, everyone starts somewhere. People have to learn from square one. But these kids have no fucking interest in this. One of them literally admitted to pursuing this degree for the "lavish life" that comes with the salary. Others just picked programming because they didnt know what else to choose to get into the school. It fucking saddens me. I hope that one or some of them end up caring and finding a passion in this field, otherwise I feel fucking sorry for them having to spaghetti code their way through life to get a paycheck cause they couldnt be bothered to put in the effort. I feel even more sorry for any devs they work with in the future too.

The other annoying bit is that I can't test out of this class!! so it looks like for either 7 hours a week ill be bored out of my fucking mind with these beginner concepts or ill be helping others fix really stupid shit in their code (like putting quotes around hello world so it would actually print the string).

Fucking hell. Waste of a semester class.

Jenkins knows what's up

1969 vs 2017

Your website looks great. I have told my secretary to send you your payment.

Wait, I forgot to check it on Internet Explorer. Give me a second let me check now.

Me: Sir, I suggest that you complete the payment before you proceed with any further tests!

,,,,*

Always remember: Every time you write a for loop like that: for (int i = 1; i <= n; i++) a cat dies!

You don't know how much knowledge in this picture...

Whenever I feel depressed in life.. I open my GMail inbox...I find:

1) 10 banks are giving me easy loans.

2) I have won GBP 10000000 and USD 500000 for unknown reasons.

3) 10 Job companies have best jobs for me.

4) 5 matrimonial sites have most suited matches for me.

5) Dr. Batra has claimed that he will cure my hair fall.

6) 3 universities are giving me degrees in random subjects.

Not work, but was very pissed off anyways.

So, today my C# lecturer was teaching about escape sequences in strings. Specifically, he's showing how to escape the single quotes character ( ' ) since we're learning about how to send SQL queries as well.
He started writing on the whiteboard the following and said that this was how to escape the single quotes character in a string:
\' "abc123" \'
Me and one of my classmates looked at this and started to ask questions, since this is definitely not how you do it. Somehow, the lecturer could not understand us. We tried to explain it the best we could, starting from verbally, then writing on the whiteboard, then even showing code on a laptop. For some unknown reason the lecturer still couldn't understand where he was wrong and both of us just gave up after 15 minutes of trying to explain it.
Mind you, most of the class had little to none prior programming experience, me and said classmate are one of the few that actually programmed before, so all my other classmates were just very confused as to what is right and what is wrong.
Now I'm really questioning my lecturer's abilities....

what's scarier than the red demon or pennywise? THE GRADLE DAEMON

I saw this yesterday and thought it's kind of nice. Probably not everybody will understand it as it's German. But the level of creativity is definitely gratifying

!rant
In javaScript there are three ways to interpret comments (this also works the same way in many other languages):

// This is a comment :)
/* This is also a comment :)) */
try {
    This is the third comment :)))
}catch(){}

Somehow I feel like I personally owe Linus for git.

17:50 Colleague whispers "fuck" and the entire project we've worked on for the last half year responds with 404.

17:55 A quick diagnosis shows that she wrote "rm - rf ../" instead of "./" when she threw out her staging dir an thereby deleted everything.

17:58 git pull, everything is back.

18:15 everything is configured and we're up and running again.

**Alternative Timeline without Version control **

17:58 We start looking through Backup folders

18:20 We're fairly confident to have found the most up to date Backup in /var/backup/newback/v2/june/new/released/ and start copying back into the project directory.

19:30 Some files are missing we start patching shit up.

19:40 I realize how much work went down the drain and start strangling my colleague. The Api seems to do the most important things again.

20:00 My colleagues dead body is hidden and I'm 80% confident that the tasks depending on us should run.

Next day: They didn't run. Every nightly build failed, nobody can do anything useful.

A week later : Shits starting to work again, all lost files are replaced. Replacement for dead colleague still missing though.

It's moments like this that make you really appreciate the luxurys we have nowadays...

Going live on Friday.
What could possibly go wrong?

🎉😄🔫

I code using Vim to avoid memory leaks.
Nothing leaks outside Vim. Nothing ever leaves.

"If you design something to be idiot proof, the universe will design a better idiot."

!false
It's funny cause it's true 😐

Ohhh helll nooooo

Here I am, 'Junior' in my title and on my paycheck, training my 'Senior' colleague on the concept of variable types.

// Hello world
~World(); // oups 😅

I'm sure it was already posted here, but I couldn't resist. 👌