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The moment you realize you're just good at googling and not an expert in programming...
That's when the internet connectivity is down!5 -
*Tries to pull down code changes*
*Repo is dead*
*Tries to load IDE*
*IDE is loaded via the cloud and it is down*
*Tries to contact help desk*
*Help desk is down*
*Sits in silence*
Guess I am done for the day.6 -
Wrote a script that calms the extreme use of exclamation/question marks and capslocked rants, do have to say, it makes it much easier to read many of the rants, it also adds small stats at the bottom of the rant
may sound like it takes the "fun" out of those rants, but it only triggers if the capslock is more than the lowercased letters
wish the devrant webapp was accessible from mobile, to use all them scripts on mobile too
25 -
Also a big “fuck you” to whoever decided under any circumstance holding the power button down on a computer case meant anything other than shut this mother fucker all the way down and try the fuck again.
Gahhh. When I hold the power button I don’t what you to sleep, I want you to die! I’m electronically smothering your bitch ass. When I’m holding down the power button to restart, the computer should feel like it’s being waterboarded! Like these may be it’s last moments on Earth if it doesn’t act right and get in compliance! No it’s not nap time, it’s time to shut up or shut down...forever!9 -
Had two choices: shut down and update, or shut down.
Clicked shut down.
Working on updates, 30% complete.
Cunts. Why did you even ask.10 -
I walked down a street where the houses were numbered 64K, 128K, 256K, 512K and 1MB
That was a trip down the memory lane5 -
I hope you will forgive me for a third hand story, but I'm one of those evil developers, not a support per se. But I thought you'd enjoy this story anyway. So this happened to a colleague of a colleague:
$Hero - our hero. $Cop - A representative of our hard worked law enforcement agency.
So $Hero is happily speeding along in his car, running a few yellow lights a bit late, etc. Finally, the law catches up to him and pulls him over. Here's how the conversation went:
$Cop: Can I see your driving license, please?
$Hero (with smug grin): Certainly. Here it is, officer.
$Cop takes license back to motorcycle and speaks into radio.
$Hero: It's not going to help you any, though.
$Cop (with no reaction): What do you mean?
$Hero (with wider grin): The server you have to check it against is down.
$Cop (still no reaction): And why do you say that?
$Hero: Because I'm the guy they called to get on site and get it up again.
Our hero did not get a fine this time. Instead he got a police escort to his workplace.
Source: reddit r/talesfromtechsupport3 -
Roommate's boyfriend visits just to work because his laptop can't connect via WiFi anymore.
Described the problem and fix attempts yesterday, he got two other tech savvy people involved, now suspects hardware problem.
I needed <1m to re-activate the WiFi adapter, now I'm seen as the local tech God as I deserve.3 -
Microsoft, if I click the "Update and shut down" button it means I want you to update and shut down, not do a third of the update, shut down then wait for me to turn the computer back on for you to finish! Why can't it just do the update, reboot as necessary then shut down once it's all done?3
-
I work for a company that is 100% remote. Slack just went down. We're doomed, on Halloween of all days.3
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When android starts updating an app thus shutting it down while I use it, I want to go and burn down Google7
-
--- UK Mobile carrier O2's data network vanishes like a fart in the wind ---
One of the largest mobile carriers in the UK; O2 has been having all manner of weird and wonderful problems this morning as bleary eyed susbcribers awoke to find their data services unavailable. What makes this particular outage interesting (more so than the annoyingly frequent wobblers some mobile masts have) is that the majority of the UK seems to be affected.
To further compound the hilarity/disaster (depending on which side of the fence you're on), Many smaller independent carriers such as GiffGaff and Tesco Mobile piggy-back off O2's network, meaning they're up the stinky creek without a paddle as well. Formal advice from the gaseous carrier is to reboot your device frequently to force a reconnect attempt, Which we're absolutely sure won't cause any issues at all with millions of devices screaming at the same network when it comes back up.
Issue reports began flooding DownDetector at around 5am (GMT), With PR minions formally acknowledging the issue 2 hours later at 7am (GMT) via the most official channel available - Twitter. After a few recent updates via the grapevine (companies involved seems to be keeping their heads down at the minute) Ericsson has been fingered for pushing out a wonky software update but there's been no official confirmation of this, so pitchforks away please folks.
If you're in need of a giggle while you wait for your 4G goodness to return, You can always hop on an open WiFi network and read the tales of distress the data-less masses are screaming into the void.3 -
tfw...
• dude chews you out for broken code
• wait patiently for dude to finish
• head on down to "git blame" town
• show him that _he_ was the author of said broken code
• tell dude to take a seat
🤫🤫🤫2 -
This is how I imagine the apocalypse is going to look like...
(All these website are down/experiencing issues because fastly is down)
14 -
Windows: You have low power (5% = like 5 mins)
Me: Goes to shit down
Windows: You can only shut down if you update
Me: I'm not risking that *holds power button down and smothers it to death*16 -
Clever that it is printed upside down, so you can look down and actually read it.
https://store.xkcd.com/collections/...
9 -
# 3 weeks ago
customer informed us that the app will get quite some load since the beginning of July
# this monday
last spare hdd on database's SAN died.
I told everyone another hdd is to follow it very soon eithet whether nothing is done at all or if anyone attempts to touch the san array [cuz that's what redundant raids do...]. No fucks given by anyone, no attempts to have maintenance and planned outage within 24 hrs....
# this morning
another hdd has failed and now 1tb of data is lost. No way to restore backups cuz there is no database to restore them to....
# 20 minutes later I head out to get some popcorn. It's gonna be a fun week!
So... The planned heavy load [and revenue along with it] is not gonna happen... I guess they are gonna ha a week long outage.
That's what happens when you ignore warning shots fired at your face.2 -
*wants to do some coding for once*
Stack Overflow: sorry, we're offline 😶
Classic 😑
Also it's Monday. Coincidence? Most certainly not!!5 -
What do Developers at Office do when the internet is down ?
(at mine, we play the dinosaurs game and compete for the highest score.)16 -
Windows: I have updates, please pick an option:
* Update and shut down
* Update and reboot
Me: Ok, update and shut down
Windows: Updates and reboots
9 -
A few years back, when I register for an account, I can easily find the year of my birth on top of the dropdown list. Now it's going down down down....1
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Seriously?! What the actual fuck?! O.o Dafaq were they thinking?! In our building, we have a lift..two buttons..one up, one down.. duh! How hard it is to actually program them properly?! I wanna go down, I press down..then the lift takes the guy from 4th floor who wants to go up to 5th down to second and I enter..then we go up to 5th then down to zero.. WTF?!
Am I missing something?! Am I going crazy?! Or did someone fuckup the comands badly.. WTF!!!!6 -
Was trying to be cool and wanted to delete all data on my USB stick using sudo rm - rf /*
Well, it deleted all data. But on my primary drive. So I ended up loosing all my work progress.5 -
Anybody uses Slack at work
My whole company freaked out today because Slack servers were down
It was hilarious 😂2 -
Internet went down at the office, was 10pm so probably time to stop working anyways.
Get home, Internet is down. Text friend, their Internet is down.
The isp for this entire area is offline.8 -
What happened to devrant? It has been showing the same rant after 5 or 10 posts and I have been on 3 different wifi places1
-
Nightmare came true..
Stackoverflow down..
I am not able to access it...
Checking if it's really down or VPN issues..
Update: VPN is not an issue. It's down.
6 -
if (down(KEY_LEFT) && down(KEY_UP) && down(KEY_DOWN)) {
calc.exe
}
/*
because why not..
src: https://fwupd.org/lvfs/devices/...
*/
6 -
*opens Eclipse to do some dev work*
*Pressed Ctrl + Alt + down arrow to duplicate code*
*sees screen upside down*
Thank you Intel. I needed that...
5 -
A personal memo to all developers on devRant:
* Assume every external line of code, (including every service you consume) is an unreliable crock of flaming shit. These services can and will fail in the most glorious ways. Write your code to be resilient, and ASSUME FAILURE of dependencies. Even if it's your own team writing the other service.
Heard in a meeting today: "Your team's service outage is going to cause my service to corrupt the database!"
Response I wanted to give: "No, you asshat, my service outage is a normal part of living with microservices. Your app should have been smart enough to recognize the failure."9 -
My GF found this on 9gag, though it'd be worth reposting :p
But oh damn I wish it was this easy...
5 -
So guys, for those of you that know what a burn down chart is, this is my teams, aka Front-end ONLY for end of March.
7 -
"SO is down, SO is down! Pray for our souls! "
Meh, not sure I use it once a month so..
"Pornhub is down! "
Yo wtf know we're talking about a plateform I use!9 -
A bit over a week ago a headhunter contacted me for a new opportunity.
I thought about it, but declined because I'm afraid to leave job certainly.
I regretted turning it down hours after I did, but didn't want to admit it so I kept quiet.
Today he send me an email that there would never be an easy time to make decisions, and that I had all the opportunities that were possible.
He has no idea how much motivation he just gave me.4 -
Not sure how other developers handle this but I just had a break down and do not want to see another piece of code for at least a week :/13
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Manager after google went down: Hey I don't want our project to go like google. Once one server went down, gmail went down, then youtube, then drive, and everything else with it. Could we separate all of our features into different servers so that if one thing goes down, the rest aren't affected?
NO9 -
TIL how to mess with your neighbors who steal your wifi.
Simple, just turn everything they request upside down.
http://ex-parrot.com/~pete/...5 -
Whenever you feel sad just remember that when Microsoft Visual Studio App Center is down, just like StackOverflow, nobody cares...
1 -
We had a major core router hardware failure in our LA datacenter today and every one of our services has been down since 6am, including all production servers. We have about 15,000 sites down across our entire platform. Our manager came over and told us to just go home because we need to replace the hardware and the process is expected to take all day, and we can't do any work until then because all the production servers are down. So you could say that it's been a pretty easy Friday so far! I'm headed home to play Spider-Man2
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For once I'm actually relieved Stackoverflow is down, when I opened this page I immediately started reading the code out of habit - for a few seconds I was like "holyshit what the fuck have you gotten yourself into this time!? I was googling syntax...".
The only reason I looked up in the end to realize I'm a few sandwiches short of a picnic is that after a few seconds the color scheme made my eyes bleed and I wanted to know wtf was going on with the font. I think I've had enough internet for one day...
HTTP/1.1 420 "Error: Programmer is too stoned to repsond."
3 -
Currently quadruple booked for meetings at this time slot. I'm picking the one where the most smack down needs to be laid down.3
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Driving to a family friend after work to check his wifi connection issues.
Turns out that she didn't knew about the hardware switch to turn it on and off again... 😏2 -
Oh, a big "Learn More" button on the hero of your webpage. Let me click that. Oh, it slightly scrolls down to the bottom. I didn't expect that. Thanks for saving me some mousewheel flings. I appreciate it. Really.
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Our main server that stores everything and that everyone uses has been down for about an hour now. It's okay though I get paid by the hour. Plus, I'm working remotely today.
Probably doesn't help that we let other people other than the IT department mess with what we put on the server.1 -
Just got stood down today.
The company I'm assigned to at the moment gave my employer a days notice that they are halting the project.
Time to hit the vodka.3 -
geek fun fact!
Did you know? Swiping down requires more calories than scrolling down on your mouse!3 -
pencil and paper.
kind of weird right? haha I just like writing down stuff, it helps me sort the details out when I write them down.5 -
Has anyone else thought, when the internet is down, that theoretically, the entire world's internet could be down, and you would never even know?5
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Today we updated PHP on our server. From 7.0 to 7.2
Promptly the whole server went down and none of the pages on it worked anymore. I guess we sort of forgot that there are other pages on the serve than the one we were working on...
Now everything is operational again.3 -
- the first time I have to touch a GO codebase
- it's the day GH goes down
come on, what's happening here! First dR, now GH? Tomorrow what - SO's turn?7 -
!dev
Ive been looking for a hobby for years but nothing is interesting enough.. i lose interest within a few hours (besides cars but thats expensive so i only work on it very once in a while).
But now everything changed.. I was looking for something that keeps my mind busy but I was soooo bored those last months that I went fishing just to get outside..
turns out my new hobby is the opposite of what i was looking for.. fishing and completely turn off my brain.. its so calming to just be alone in the nature and do a very simple task, thowing out and pulling in with a chamce of catching a nice dinner.. try-catch basically..
assembled my first custom rod today, i kept in mind what i liked about certain rods and then put the best of each of them into my own rod..
if youre stressed and and introvert you should try it..
havent been that calm in years..13 -
Instagram is down!
Anyone willing to post food pics here?
Sexy pics also appreciated
I need my dose25 -
Tommy: how much time do you spend on stackoverflow?
Jeff: *downvotes Tommy* you know alot actually1 -
Speedtest result for a network used by 20 employees:
14ms ping / 18.14Mbps down / 5.34Mbps up
Speedtest for my mobile phone:
25ms ping / 88.45Mbps down / 14.93Mbps up1 -
Just when I want to get inspirations for my personal site by looking at other websites by devranters the famous website of @alice is down :(
Any other websites I should check out as example?8 -
Someone asked "What's a sad reality for devs?"
Let me add one to that cuz I'm too lazy to find the actual thread.
A sad reality of devs is to be dependent on the management's mercy for them to be in the team/company. Your years of work can be thrown out the window just like that when management feels like it and there is almost nothing devs can do about it.
This sprung to mind cuz I experienced that today. My client cut my dev team in half to "make up for the recent losses the company faced". Obviously my team wasn't responsible for it.
This shit sucks man.1 -
DevSup channel:
Someone: FYI, Db is down(ticket link)
Otherone: Can anyone help me connecting
with db? I am having issues.
I am so happy I am leaving this place in 2 months.... 😂😂1 -
Lays down to go to sleep.
*beep* new urgent help request.
Hmm, bet it's something silly, better check anyway......
Whole servers down....
How fun 😔1 -
Whenever I get a notification on devrant, deep down I wish it to be a mention ☺️
Expectations always drags me down.9 -
Have you ever been interrupted because a marketing workmate had a friend on the phone who needed advice on a WordPress hosting, and wanted your advice right now?
Because I have.
When we had a massive server failure and our production environment was down.
Seriously, what the fuck is wrong with people nowadays.6 -
Apparently shutting down Windows doesn't mean shutting down Windows. Good to know that the apparently superior OS can't shut down properly
6 -
So couple of days ago a competitor ISP rep. came to our door, describing that people in the neighbourhood reported outtages to them from the competitor (thats already questionable, why would somebody report that to another ISP, instead of the actual ISP? like we always do) and they said they did their magical lines or whatever and that the old line we use is faulty etc. - the internet was actually stable for a good while now finally, now today it cut off, I suspect they want to force contract changes by "accidentally" fucking with the shit somewhere for sure, fucking shit gargling goblins, I was a client of that competitor ISP for a good portion of my life and each time I moved they left me without internet for atleast 5 months and that only because I threatened action, their general service also isn't more stable, literally fucking throwing a paperplane with my packets is more reliable than their bullshit alternative, their offer also would cut 90% of options I have with the current one, leaving me without telephone, tv, mobile and more - since all that would have to be contracted seperately, ending in roughly 450% actual raise per month, I fucking hate ISPs.
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Reach office early and you know what stack over flow is down god save me it's 15 minutes already some one please up it.
Bad start for monday.
1 -
When you have no work all week long because you finish 3x as fast as the estimates. You ask for more work, and due to "red tape" you can't even work on the back log.
Time to sit and look busy :).
Sadly, this is too common for me... I want to be buried in code and tasks! Not sit and twiddle my thumbs.7 -
It's going to be a long rant here and probably my fist rant ! And yes I am pissed up with a community growing in dev world .
There are so called framework experts who are so good that they can spin up a nodejs server with express and mongodb .
So to the people who bash on php , who bash down MySQL for no fuckig reason other than they have heard these are not so cool.fuck yourself incompetent piece of crap!!! I can hear all day about how algorithms and datsructure are not important form these people.fuck you because if you don't know /understand /want to understand the basics of computing how the fuck can your brain be trusted with anyting serious??If you can't write down proofs of basic / standard algorithms and till bash down on people who do those please fuck you because those are the people indirectly responsible for your Job so that u can work on fancy frameworks and cool IDE's .
Instead of whining down dedicate some time to your maturity and knowledge because that what we devs are all about.we like solving problems right?.
I repeat if you are anything like stating up it career in mid 20s maybe.leave everything if you can .Forget all fucking frameworks and technologies start with basics of computing, right at instruction level using assembly .Then move to a higher language when u know and reason about what your CPU is actually doing.
If you can't do that and keep on crying and bashing down things wihout proper explanations fuck yourself with a cactus .5 -
It's 8am and the server is down... Legit rant right? Sure, but it gets better. One of our buyers in purchasing printed out a 504 error and hand delivered it to my counterpart in our northern office.
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I started a short term contract job that requires access to company online resources. Only problem is the office I'm working in has really bad internet. The connection speed at best is comparable to dial up and at worse just non-existent. I tried tethering to my phone but this wasn't working either due to low signal. I mention this as an issue early on the week to the boss. Later in the week the boss asks how things are going at the same time that the network is down. I tell him the same problem. He then tells me his computer is fast and he has internet, so I show him the 2 computers I have access to and how they are too slow/no internet. He then tells me a bad workman blames his tools and he's not happy with me for having problems.
Don't even know what to say to that. I just told him this role wasn't working for me and clocked out.8 -
Ok people. I got a contract last year with a company, and I was their support for one year, which ended back in February. They still email me for all their problems. I don't know why. They emailed me today, for Christ's sake, on the Saturday of Easter, to tell me that their 3rd party software can't send them emails because the mailserver has that IP on greylist asking me to look into it and find a solution. AS IF I CARE! I'm with my family, taking a break for two days damn it. Panic attack came, my heartbeat rate problem kicked in and now I can't calm down. I'm trying to get into the "I don't give a fuck" mood but I can't, I'm too responsible for that, in the worst dramatic way (the world is gonna end etc).
Piece of advice:
Be very clear next time you come to terms with another company, be precise and don't let them have it their way.8 -
Well that's it folks,
Australia has started to shutdown and become the isolated island it once was again, even more so with states shutting down independently.
Atleast we have the intern -
fuck, got to reboot the modem... ... ... ... ... ... ... ...
where was i, oh yea -
internet right? It's not like the NBN wasn't designed to have every fucking Aussie using it at once or anything 🙄
https://abc.net.au/news/2020-03-22/...5 -
Got blames for 2 hours because our product went down.
Because the provider of license managment went down.
Well, now I put in place a "fuck you" work around. If licensing provider is down, people can still connect and use product (But not create new accounts).
So silly. -
I spend so much time developing, went to my parents and walkoutside. Cant believe i dont even remeber ever walking at the back part of this place. Actually looks nice. And they have been staying there for 5 years.
Anyhow. Back to the cave for me. Seems the internet is back up -
Ran the build today 4:30 and found out our grunt file is missing some pretty critical error checks without even logging a warning. A dependency was unavailable and it was pushed to production. The site was down for 30+ minutes.1
-
Second week sick I see how my life slowed down and how meaningless everything around is, everyone is rushing about some bullshit, name it new amazing job opportunity, black Friday great deal, super duper product idea or some most important bug on production that we need to fix asap.
All that can’t wait a week when I’m healthy?
Seriously, people lost their minds in today’s world to some bullshit.
I’m to old and to depressed to care about such idiotic things. Living my life as I want and on my own peace, don’t care everyone is running, I’m slowly walking and I like it.
It’s better to walk straight than run around like an idiot.1 -
An open office wouldn't be so bad if the same 3 people would actually sit the fuck down once in a while and do some actual work. Distracting as hell. It's gotten so bad that I've started writing logs of how many times they get up during the day.
// the most egregious offender
// down: 9:00
// up: 9:05
// down: 9:15
// up: 9:20
// down: 9:23
// up: 9:32
// down: 9:45
// up: 9:58
// down: 10:05
// this pattern continues the entire day
And what are they doing during these exoduses?
- Answering their personal cell phone from stay at home spouses
- Throwing trash away even though they have trash bins right NEXT to their desks.
- Pacing back and forth
- Checking the thermostat
- Checking the contents of the fridge over and over
- Being an absolute asshole!10 -
Today I had my first ever prod db fuckup due to too wide where clause in delete query. Spent 8 hours restoring service. It's 02.09 now and I'm finally home, going to bed.
Interestingly enough I've enjoyed this experience... -
Can we collectively as an industry just calm down a little and stop lying to ourselves in a misguided attempt to inflate our sense of purpose...
I just stumbled upon a job listing for a WordPress developer position that described it as "helping solve the big problems of the day". Seriously?! Let's stop and get real you're probably just building themes. Maybe a plugin or two. So just relax and accept you're just another web developer building yet another 💩site you're not solving "the big problems"...
... Then again it IS WordPress...4 -
When hosting company changes mysql host name from localhost to mysql. And you spend hour to see why your app does not connect to db because you don't wanna call support. &#-+_$&#&1
-
Why is it that people who can't do anything call the shots? Devs should call the shots and the fuckers should listen.3
-
So we have this fucking project that came straight out o Satan's anus managed by 3 fucking PMs that each of them seem to be on a different drug and none of them seem to talk to each other despite the fact that they don't shut the fuck up on meetings.
They end up asking for conflicting changes every fucking time... Like:
PM1: change this to red
PM2: change this ( same thing ) to blue
PM3: should be green
Every day I stray further away from sanity. Maybe I'll be the 4th PM in some months by this rate of craziness my mind is diving into. -
School decided to shut down their WiFi for "security" reasons (Everyone used a VPN and they were dumb fucks at networking, blocking sites like Google for having an invalid SSL certificate).
Now I'm forced to use my mobile data to keep using my Arch Linux laptop D:3 -
People wonder what would happen if internet went down while all it takes is npm repository and the dev world goes to shit xd
https://github.com/npm/cli/...2 -
porting a script that supports barewords to something that doesn't....
string up = "up", down = "down";
if(position === up)
its all well and good until you find someone copyies and pwastes that to have in every function
string up = "up", down = "down";
if(position === up)
string up = "up", down = "down";
if(position === up)
string up = "up", down = "down";
if(position === up)
then imagine a much larger dictionary. Also there was a spelling mistake, several in fact.
also who rewrote the parser to try to support keywords as variables? -
as most of you are aware of my internet issue (still not working), I came to know an amazing thing.
"there are many wonderful women live in my building. some are beautiful, some are tired, some are puzzled, some are young, some are old, some are sad...."
I didnt knew this untill I got disconnected.2 -
Didn't realize until lunch that it was Friday today. Programming really makes you lose track of time.1
-
There are days I like to pull my hair out and create a dynamic 4D map that holds a list of records. 🤯
Yes there's a valid reason to build this map, generally I'm against this kind of depth 2 or 3 is usually where I draw the line, but I need something searchable against multiple indexes that doesn't entail querying the database over and over again as it will be used against large dynamic datasets, and the only thing I could come up with was a tree to filter down on as required.6 -
Trying to install Centos7 onto my proliant g6, red screen, try a fix, red screen, try another fix, red screen, finally find a fix that seems like it is the exact problem, screen dies can't see bios... god damnit.18
-
When I say I'm a developer, it means that, in simpleton language, that I don't do your backups, I don't "repair" you PC because you're a baffon and I certainly do not edit company's logo which is in .png format deliver it in .cdr file and expect it as, as good and perfect as original, So fuck you, you impatient , imbecile , pompous prick I've ever met
> "Yeah take as much time as you want, but do it quickly"
I mean what the fuck does that even mean, if you want it done quickly then say so, be a man and face it and don't hide behind the excuse of "take as much time as you want"
Fucking idiots, little do they know when I'm in the zone I need time to think before act so I don't get blamed for "un-satisfied" product in the future.
So I've decided to leave loopholes in the current project I've been working on, deliver it, and leave the company and make their lives living hell, I know this is beneath anyone's standards but I have to do this to teach them how to treat a person properly,FUCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK,
This is going to be fun9 -
#whatsappDown in EU.
#telegramIsBetter.
maybe whatsapp servers have too (meta)data to analyze ;-)
i expect to see at least one comment with #signalIsBetter.
(10AM CET)4 -
The fun times, watching the little weenie down voting the guy who thinks vanilla js is better than jQuery. Here I thought devs were meant to be more intelligent, yet somehow a 30kb wrapper for js is better than js itself...
-
Thinking about writing a browser extension that automatically gives a thumb down to every Adam Sandler movie on Netflix. At the rate they are appearing, it's just too much manual labor.1
-
In my country, in almost any company, bank, even major telecommunication companies you'll find that their systems are down at least very frequently.
I'm currently standing in front of a Vodafone booth (they provide mobile communication and are an ISP), their system is down and the operator said to wait an hour.
What's more horrid about this is that these systems are built by fellow software engineers in my country. It sure says a lot about us, unfortunately.4 -
yo tester, I mentioned that I was off for half a day, WHY in the world are you trying to contact me to say that the test environment does not work??!!?!
There are more capable developers online that can fix that for you!!!
Stupid incompetent person!2 -
Working on production issue,
Kind of nervous checking logs and so on...
Ops manager and PO who were looking over my shoulder this whole time start shooting the breeze.
I know what they were trying to do. They are trying to create a relaxed environment.
But the issue is that the talk is very distracting. If you want to shoot the breeze please go somewhere else.
Anyway just did that, asked them to leave. They weren't happy about it. But I really needed the silence. -
Grrrr, at the end of the day just before weekend trying to arc land something so you can start fresh the next week. Boom phabricator server down. Unexpected reply.
-
anyone else get second thoughts about their bank when they see this kind of message after logging in?
"Online Banking is unavailable
We are really sorry we are preventing you from completing your banking today. Our technical teams are aware and actively investigating. Please know they are working hard to restore service as soon as possible.
Please call us at 123-456-7890 for banking assistance or information."
er... what?2 -
Writing down important things so you can say them at a meeting so people can write them down. Genius.1
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"Boss, we have a problem!"
"Don't say that, we call it -opportunity-"
"Boss, we have a lot of opportunities, the server is down."
"Ow..that's a problem"2 -
A non-relationship database system with drag and drop + business process flows. It was fun at first, but like my Android phone, it slowed the **** down so much that it affected business operations. Must have been their evil plan all along.
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Ok, so I've been down voting a few rants that I knew were reposts. But is there a way for people to find out before they post if the rant has already been posted?
The newcomers may not know if it has been posted before and down voting may not be a great idea to welcome them. :-)
cc: @dfox2 -
The day when you Plan an Alarm clock which will awake you when one of your server have trouble.
Hm I think that should look like this:
https://youtu.be/umtf9bx8cuo2 -
Am I the only one who always think in the "top-down" way to solve problems or anything since I've learned how to develop?1
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AT&T LTE broadband: 25Mbps down, 10Mbps up, $100/month
T-Mobile LTE broadband: 90Mbps down, 25Mbps up, $50/month
straight fucking upgrades out of nowhere11 -
My Instagram feed wasn't loading up, neither was the profile. I thought my app was acting up and neglected it. Apparently both FB and Instagram are down for some users around the world. Sad.
Now, even my WhatsApp is unable to send across images.
FML!2 -
I hate it whenever I wanted to leave office and shut down my PC, it shows only 'update & shut down'. Everytime!6
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Github Down - This is just another rant about Github being down.
[Imagine Github's Rainbow Unicorn Here] -
You know it's all good and well but compiling and building opensource software is like falling down a stairway and getting fucked by dependencies and quirky configurations on each step.
Forever...Down one step and down again.1 -
Yeah, it's Friday morning and guess what I left my laptop work yesterday and who just got a text saying that the server is on their ass.. yeah you are right ME. And my team who can do the same job as me on restarting the application don't ever take action on this kind of thing... Well I hope they will in a few weeks because I will be gone then2
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I'm expecting my StackOverflow questiion to get shut down and some mod to want to piss on my corpse ( https://stackoverflow.com/questions... ) so I'll ask this here too. Anyone set up the open source Jenkin in a DR environment? I'd like an Active/active hosting solution but everything I read points to Cloudbee's... Post your answer on SO if you want, I'll vote up whatever looks good, but in case it does get shut down by the assholes with a god complex, please @ me :)5
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I sadly don't remember who set this up and posted it on devRant (give me a distro) but it seems to be down :/
Would be glad to host it again if needed, I think it is a great idea. ^^
2 -
So after the CIO pretty much does a table flip to the division about causing near daily customer impact we now have seven business day cool period for Changes and 13 cross functional teams stood up with 1, 15, 30, 60, and 90 day deliverables to an executive audience.
Guess what my team did today?
Offline a major Production database during the middle of the day, thinking they were in Development. Didn’t notice for 40 minutes. -
3rd day back into work after xmas break and I still haven't had laser focus yet, and I have so many projects to do :-/
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They once shared a romantic evening on the waterfront, discussing their preferences in Middle Eastern cuisine and enjoying the serene atmosphere.
LINEBREAK
This event occurred after an ((__orgy__)) at the Tower of Dawn, where the extravagance of their many geminous epigrams culminated in the temporary abolition of common etiquette due to serendipitous fuckenstance.3 -
That moment when you explain to your manager what the term "full-stack" means and next thing you know you've gone from being a "backend c#" to azure migration expert/dba/designer/api architect/network engineer/php wordpress developer... let's go back to when you'd never heard of full-stack
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What do you guys do at work when you have no tasks, or when you are waiting for something and you know it'll take an hour or more of waiting?8
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Who else uses "Down, Left, Ctrl + V" instead of "Down, Left, [specific character]".
Because the distance from Down, Left, to the specific character is way far and slower. -
Can someone explain the future of PHP? (Serious question). I was under the impression learning php is mainly for the current job market. Otherwise the future is nodeJS, ruby, python etc.
I’m asking because I see a lot of leading development and courses on laravel for modern development and I’m wondering how relevant it is to the future.1 -
The day I'm fucking around with Kafka Streams API and had to work with Java after swearing it off 5 years ago for JS bae...
Is the day that Apache's everything is down. Can't even hit their fucking website. I just want a fat jar. Just one. -
Looking at the dev world this month like.. gitlab is down.. s3 is down.. isitdown down.. looks like devrant is using s3 as well, so no meme on this rant :/
And for the first time in a long time it's not my problem..
No job, no bugs 😖😭 -
if your dev skills are blockd ny stack overflow & want to let us know. please know that this status is overwhelmedly posted here. thanks
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