Why are apple so fucking back assward and stubborn when it comes to their app review process?

So, at work I made an app. It's a simple one, but it's an app.
It makes it so that the user doesn't have to enter their credentials to sign in to a system developed on our platform.
If you give it a hard oded config it will only connect to that server, if not, it fetches a list of available servers and the user has to select which they want to connect to.

I've uploaded basically the same fucking app thrice, twice with and once without a config.
Two of them when somewhat smoothly through the review, but the last one has been stuck for almost two fucking months! And guess what it's one of the ones with a config!?!

How is that in any way consistent?
They fill us with shit like "your screenshots aren't representative", so I update them.
They go "this is not an AP for the public", I tell them I give less than a steaming pile of fresh dung from a retarded donkey, the intended users are freelancers, so just fucking greenlight it.
Then they go "your screenshots aren't representative", so I tell them to pound sand or specify which screenshot is wrong or what they think is missing.

How are they so fucking inconsistent with their process? Isn't is this process that they used as of defence for their shittastic monopoly, that they don't want to call a monopoly?
I'm so fucking tired.

Scouting.
I've been a scout since I was 7 and been happy for it.

So I just got the brand spanking new MacBook Pro M2, primarily because the MacBook Air shitbox from 2014 started crashing when I started VSCode...

So now that I have a "proper" laptop, I should be able to work remote, right?... Right?!

Nope! Because our IDE of choice is (I fucking kid you not): Netbeans 7.4!, maybe 8.2... And we use SVN.
And apparently Netbeans 14 just shits the bed when I try to open our projects. Intellij is also no help, because our build scripts require Netbeans...

So the workaround? Parsec, of course!
So now I'll be able to work remote, by remoting into my windows desktop at work.

What a lovely connected world we live in!

Decided to start using my smart watch again, mainly to track steps and pulse.

It has this weird "body battery" measurement, supposedly it shows how much energy you have left out of 100.

My problem is that I'm apparently in a sleep like state when I'm coding (low pulse, no movement and low breath count), so it charges my "body battery"... But I'm actually working...
Thus the watch is like: "no way you need to sleep now, you slept all day", when I head for bed...
Fuck me.

Reason #69 why I'm considering nuking windows on my main pc.

I had to print something... (I know, why would I want a document to exist in the physical world?)
1. The pc couldn't see the printer, that was connected via USB... Replugging the cable fixed it... How?
2. I had to print images, so I had pre-opened the 9 files. After printing 4 images windows decided to update the imageviewer, closing all the instances and not open them again... Wtf?

So that's how my evening was fucked, how was yours?

So apparently all you have to do to get mad kudos from a DocuSign API dev, is to implement an integration without contacting them for help...
Guess they don't trust their own documentation and I don't blame them, it is kinda bad. Tho it is a whole lot better than the other systems I've been working with lately...
Those have been nonexistent at best, completely wrong at other times...

After debugging this shit Java program for 2 days fucking straight, finally this shit works! Hallelujah!

Turns out, if you want to enable local DCOM/COM+ on windows, you have to not tell the piece of shit firewall that it should consider the network "public"...
WHY?!?
IT'S FUCKING LOCAL! NOT A SINGLE FUCKING NETWORK PACKET IS SEND! WHY?!?

Finally done implementing this fuck shit API...

As pr my last rant, I had to implement an API that prints a document twice using "Microsoft Print to PDF"... Turns out that's a shit task, who would have thunk 😑
This is one big ass Calvinball game and I'm not a fan, but if that's the shit you have to do, then I guess I'll try to make it resilient...

So after 5 days of trying to figure out why the fuck nemID (danish online id) is a piece of shit and doesn't want to show the pdfs I'm sending, so that they can be fucking signed, I've finally found a way to produce pdfs that it doesn't choke the fuck out on.
Just fucking open the fucking pdf in fucking Acrobat and fucking print it to a fucking pdf using fucking Microdick print to pdf... TWICE! WTAF?
So guess what I'll be creating an API for today...

Also fucking give me a proper error code when your shit doesn't work! Why the fuck are you sending me an error code stating that the checksum doesn't match, when 1) I didn't fucking send you one in the first place and 2) it doesn't work because you fucks didn't implement the entire fucking pdf spec! So when my fucking pdf contains some fucking pdf-element that you decided was to hard to implement a web view for, tell me that!

Today I finally smashed/carefully took apart an old piece of furniture.
Kept all the big pieces of wood, because I'm gonna turn them into cutting boards.
The furniture has been with my scout group for 15 years, so it has some sentimental value to some people, but to most it was just a useless piece of shit.

Reduce-reuse-recycle I guess.

Sitting down for an entire weekend with a couple of friends, just to work on a side project.
No deadline, just fun. And beer, lots of beer 😅

Yay😊
The company I'm working at (as student developer) just told me that they would love to hire me full-time, when I'm done!
Love working here, so totally gonna take them up on that 😊

Yay, I have to rewrite + design a 15-20 year old website 🎉

Originally written in, God knows what version of php, HTML and JS by a Java dev, and patched every other year when something broke or a new feature was needed, every time by someone new...
Some years ago the system was moved from a Windows host to Ubuntu and that was a nightmare in its own, because of all the hard-coded paths...

Welp, at least some fucker found another fucker who is willing to create a new design for the site, so that's off my plate...

Just spend the entire weekend preparing for, execution and cleaning up after a live stream.
When we'll, but holy shitfuck was it a stressful experience.

The guy in charge and with the vision pulled this one out of his ass, 12 hours before going live:
By the way, that system I talked about, where a moderator can pick comments from the YouTube chat, so that the hosts can look at the useful ones and choose to have them shown on the stream. Yeah, it doesn't work and you are better at programming than me, so you fix it.

Good bye sleep 😔

So DTU just decided to update one of the central systems, they project that the system will be offline for about 12 hours.

Just so happens that IT'S THE FUCKING SYSTEM THAT ALL STUDENTS NEED TO USE RIGHT FUCKING NOW.
Just about everyone has to hand in assignments tonight! 🙄

Well, I guess it's better than deploying on a Friday... (it's Wednesday) IF IT WASN'T BECAUSE THE STUDENTS ARE ON FUCKING VACATION FOR THE ENTIRE NEXT WEEK!
AARGH!

I force myself to start and in preparation I've made sure to have at least one case of beer in the fridge.
Then just try to stay on the infamous Balmer peak until I fall asleep or run out of beer 😅

"All that shines ain't gold and all that is shit ain't brown" - Malk de Koijn

Got mixed feelings about dart/flutter 😕

On one hand, I find it very easy to work with and very fast for prototyping. Everything is smooth once you compile it.

On the other hand, I keep running into weird as shit bugs and missing functionality. The bugs are primarily related to iOS, so that might not entirely be their fault. Last one required me to delete the entire project and rebuild it, the clean command didn't work shit.
It's quite annoying that so many features are missing, but I guess that's life, when you try to work with a multi platform language...

Did I every tell you about that time I scared a boss (not mine, he was in the room) so much, that he was to scared to enter my office for the next couple of weeks? 😅
Good times 😊

Tl;dr: He was the reason I was working at max capacity and then he started complaining that shit wasn't working.

Full story:
I was out of office, building up a new site. I was the only IT working that day, others were out on vacation.
Suddenly I start getting flooded with calls from other sites, that nothing works. It is so bad, that my boss can't reach me on the company phone, so he calls me on my private phone.
Apparently all the servers are down.
So me into a taxi, heading for the main office.
When I get there I just start booting the servers on by one, because they didn't like that they had lost power. While I'm working, my boss is standing there, ready to help.
Another boss enters the office and goes: "I can't access Navision". To which I quickly reply something like: "Well everything is down, I'm the only one who can fix it and I'm working as fast as I can".
Two weeks later, another employee tells me, that the other boss has been running all his equipment off a battery backup, since the failure, because his power cord failed. He spilled a cup of coffee on it and therefore was the reason, that all the servers lost power (bad setup, I know). And apparently I was so frightening that he didn't have the courage to ask for a new power cord 😂
Best thing was that my boss never stopped me or told me that I did something wrong.

Two days ago...

I was happy, building out the network in a new lokation.

Suddenly my phone just doesn't want to stop ringing, from all the other lokation calling in that they can't connect to HQ.
Then HQ calls, we don't have internet, nothing works. The one guy on location who has access to the server room enters and finds all the servers offline and a couple of breakers blown.
Turn on breakers, servers won't boot properly.
Me in a taxi and hurry to HQ, to help boot the servers.

Afterwards I find out that one of the bosses spilled a cup of coffee on his desk, shorting the circuit.
Apparently he is on the same breaker group as the servers!?! What the actual fuck!

At least now the other bosses are like; yeah, we need to do something about that

The Chrome plugin "Darkness" (I might have mentioned it before 😅)

Yes I know "Stylish" was a thing and it has been replaced, but by then I was way to invested in "Darkness" and it has some features that the others are missing; the styles are tested and maintained and it has themes to choose from.

And it has been a nice experience working with scss 😄

Yes, it's in a basement, but I'm close to my servers 😅

Woo hoo, how I just love having to develop an extension to a system that the company bought 😍
Especially when there is an API that is completely undocumented, not even mentioned on their site 😍
Even more when it's a feature you expected to be there when you bought the system, because it's a reasonable thing to expect 😍

Fucking Ubiquity Unifi Video 😭

Once I had a stupid idea, on a Wednesday, started coding, found the buzz, found the booze, got in the groove, realized that it was 7am and had to to work 😭

At least I was almost done, but damn that was a long Thursday

There is nothing better than working on internal systems, that only you and a group of friends will be using.

Yeah, they aren't the most tech savvy, but boy oh boy can you have fun with the content on the site.

For example, the login button says "open sesame" (in danish) and some of the errors are like "dude, really? Why would you do that?" followed by the actual error.

I freaking love it 😄

Last week all the sites I'm hosting started acting real strange... Nothing made sense.

One site gave an error telling me that the database couldn't write to disk "insufficient space"...

What? Are you fucking kidding me?

Turns out indexing 14TB of data kinda makes mlocate use a lot of space...

Excluded one folder, optimized the db and voila, from 17GB to less than 1GB...

That one time I answered a question on a forum and another guy was like: "Damn son, I wish I had thought of that! Wanna hang at this code-LAN next weekend?" 😅

Being a scout.
It allows me to practice leadership, patience and explaining and it forces me to be outside and active every now and then.
The fresh air really helps, and I always bring a notebook 🤓

I was drunk at a party and so was this guy, that I knew from scouting and who knew that I was capable of programming, even tho he very clearly disagreed with my choice in language.
We started talking about this new system that we (all scouts in Denmark) have to use and he told me how his work was affected by the fact that this systems API is the purest of shit.
He told me that he would really like someone to help him with his work, cause right now he was alone. They were looking for someone new, but for some reason the boss wanted a new guy to have 5 years of experience in Java... Which they don't use.
So he got my information and would put in a good word for me

Dat feel when you have to threaten your laptop with a reinstall, before it starts working...

Literally happened to me yesterday.
And to ad to the drama I didn't have a bootable USB ready, so I forced the laptop to create the installer, that would ultimately be its own demise 😅
Suddenly, halfway through the setup of the USB, everything began working 😜