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I find it funny how, whenever I'm tipsy or drunk, my typing speed increases as fuck and the amount of typing errors I make decreases a lot!
I guess it'd because the part of my brain which thinks very consciously gets turned off...?17 -
#include <rant>
So, in my class I have this one dude who also code, "Awesome" I thought when I first saw that he codes, he codes in c# and claims to know JavaScript.
So I hung out with him a bit on recess/break time, and I eventually found out that he is a d*ckhead
First of all, he claims that he can code ANYTHING, I mean triple A games, the machine that can find pi in 10 seconds. And I know that this isn't true, because he "can't bother" with showing me it.. whatever I think.
I also mentioned that he is a d*ck, why am i saying that? Because if you make an error he would just go, "there is supposed to be *insert random bullshit here* instead of *a typo that I made*, retard. You are honestly fucking stupid" Listen, I love when people point errors out, it really helps. But when you say it like that, it honestly makes me sad. One day, I was messing around with classes in python and he went "hey idiot! That's wrong! There is supposed to be a *random word* instead of *working code*". The funny thing is, HE DOESNT KNOW WHAT PYTHON IS. So I comment out the working code and puts in his c# bs there instead. And he just says, "it isn't working because there's a private class instead of a public class. Ehmm, excuse me? This is python, ok.
Oh and he told me I was a retard because I can't develop triple a games using pure JavaScript.
Any tips on dealing with the guy?23 -
Manager: Hey software engineer, how's the project going?
Software Engineer: Good, just debugging my code.
Manager: Debugging? What kind of bug are you trying to fix?
Software Engineer: The ones that make my computer turn into a lava lamp.
Manager: Ha ha, very funny. But seriously, how can I help?
Software Engineer: Well, I need a bigger monitor. My current one doesn't have enough real estate to display all the errors.
Manager: How about a second monitor?
Software Engineer: No, I need a bigger universe.
Manager: I'll see what I can do. In the meantime, keep coding. We have a deadline to meet.
Software Engineer: No problem, I have all the time in the world. I just need to find a way to slow down time.
Manager: I wish I had your optimism. Just let me know if you need anything else.
Software Engineer: How about a unicorn? I heard they're good at coding.
Manager: I'll see what I can do, but in the meantime, stick to using a keyboard.3 -
Hi lil puppies what's your problem?
*proxy vomits*
Have you eaten something wrong....
*proxy happily eats requests and answers correctly*
Hm... Seems like you are...
*proxy vomits dozen of requests at once*
... Not okay.
Ok.... What did u you get fed you lil hellspawn.
TLS handshake error.
Thousands. Of. TLS. Handshake. Errors.
*checking autonomous system information*
Yeah... Requests come from same IP or AS. Someone is actively bombing TLS requests on the TLS terminator.
Wrong / outdated TLS requests.
Let's block the IP addresses....
*Pats HAProxy on the head*
*Gets more vomit as a thank you no sir*
I've now added a list of roughly 320 IP adresses in 4 h to an actively running HAProxy in INet as some Chinese fuckers seemingly find it funny to DDOS with TLS 1.0... or Invalid HTTP Requests... Or Upgrade Headers...
Seriously. I want a fucking weekend you bastards. Shove your communism up your arse if you wanna have some illegal fun. ;)11 -
Oh man, it's so funny when people try to install npm via cmd and they can't understand, what fuck all errors they are getting.2
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Funny story...
Got a small college assignment based on Java and Cassandra(database). The database shell was running fine. Spent 5 days removing the random java exceptions and working on the basic connectivity, searched everywhere on Stack overflow and other forums for solutions and still no help.
So, I decided to write a program that would print only the output as I knew what would be the output when it will run. Took a screenshot of it and made up a cover story to tell my professor that I did it on a friend's computer.
But while I was taking a screenshot of the Eclipse with code window and output window, some random syntax errors popped up.(but they weren't syntax error).
So I created a new project and copied the pom.xml file and the code into the new one(I tried this one before and it didn't work). And there were no errors. So I took a screenshot of it with output of different file and opened a different file.
But then, don't know what came across my mind and I clicked on run just to see if this works, and it worked fine. And now I'm like.. WTF JUST HAPPENED!! -
So, we are having a SaaS service for people where they can build X stuff. It is all fine as long as you are using basic things there, no complex cases and so on. Even on some complex - it does work just fine.
Here's the rant itself:
The production server throws us errors every 5-10 minutes that something broke and fails to do job X. At first we were all hands on deck fixing it ASAP to make it stable to later realise that most of these cases were users doing stupid shit. Then we began to fix the core issues rather than chasing every single issue there is (costs are important you know) - funny enough, we get few support requests a week and our 1h response time + 24h fix time usually buys us that customer and allows t o leave a great impression.
So all in all, bugles production is good but great support - is way better. Users can deal with issues especially if they are experimenting there but when they need answers - you'd better give it to them.1 -
I've always found it funny when sql errors "at or near" a character. I don't know enough about sql to understand why it does that (although I'm sure there a reason!)....but it just sounds like it's not trying hard enough 😂
Maybe someone smarter can explain?1 -
For some weeks now I've been having strange compilation issues with Android Studio on Windows 10. Some of my builds fail with funny errors that have only 1-3 StackOverflow entries. When I switch to Linux (Pop!OS) it complies without errors apk gets installed on device. At some point I was frustrated where I spent a whole day trying to figure what's wrong only at night to code using Linux and it compiled. What's up with Android Dev on Windows?3
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Tldr:
Can't fucking figure out why I'm the only one who can't solve a DP problem in code, when me and friends use the same idea and no one knows why only mine doesn't work...
We are given a task to solve a problem using DP. My friends write their code with the same idea as a solution. Copying the code is not allowed. I follow the same idea but my code won't work. Others look into it, in case they find errors. They can't find any.
The problem (for reference):
Given a fixed list of int's a = (a_1,a_2,...,a_n) and b = (b_1,b_2,...,b_n), a_i and b_i >= 0, a.length == b.length
We want to maximize the sum of a_i's chosen. Every a_i is connected with the b_i at the same index. b_i tells us how many indexes of a we have to skip if choosing the corresponding a_i, so list index of b_i + b_i's value + 1 would be the position of the next a_i available.
The idea:
Create a new list c with same length as a (or b).
Begin at the end of c and save a_n at the same position in c. Iterate backwards through c and at each position add the max value of all previously saved values of c (with regards to the b_i-restriction) with the current a_i, else a_i + 0 if the b_i-resctriction goes beyond the list.
Return the max value of c.
How does that not work for me but for the others?? Funny enough, a few given samples work with my code. I'm questioning my coding ability...7 -
There is nothing better than working on internal systems, that only you and a group of friends will be using.
Yeah, they aren't the most tech savvy, but boy oh boy can you have fun with the content on the site.
For example, the login button says "open sesame" (in danish) and some of the errors are like "dude, really? Why would you do that?" followed by the actual error.
I freaking love it 😄 -
I ranted about my new laptop and linux mint on it https://devrant.com/rants/1919501 and I said there will be a rant about the OSs I tried
So my new laptop is the Xiaomi notebook pro, with the highest config: i7/16g/256g/mx150 gpu/alu body/10h battery/perfect keyboard/great screen. Its Chinese, but Xiaomi... you kinda expect flaws, problems, but i watched all the reviews and knew about all the things, and the price was 35% down (836 + taxes = 997EUR) for a macbook pro clone? its a no brainer.. but i had a rattling vent (fixed with shoe glue lol) now its just loud in windows but not in linux, strange
I changed the Chinese windows on it to EN... worked perfect... but... It has 2 slots for NVMe ssd so i bought a 500gb one for the second slot, I put windows on that (because games, occasional insta story video edit, big files, anyway...) and put Ubuntu on the 256gb original ssd.. (to develop on that) and it was slow as fuck, I got errors all over the places, problems I never had before with ubuntu.. and mind you Windows had over 3000 MB/s for read and almost 2000 MB/s for write speeds on that disk... I was disappointed af. MIND YOU all my life I had Ubuntu on secondary old/slow laptops/pcs working JUST FINE... I still don't know what the fuck happened.. the ui was choppy to say the least and I just was not ready to accept that on this HW while windows worked like a charm (yuck)
Then I went with Manjaro (based on arch, here on devrant people like that stuff, must be great)... well after I installed it, it booted up to the login page and black screen... something with the MX150 GPU according to the interwebs... by this time I was so frustrated and in time stress because of my flight home for xmas that I decided not to fix Manjaro but to go with another flavour
Linux Mint it is... everything kinda works out of the box, like they say... it has dark mode everywhere in the settings without downloading some bloated theme or plugin like on other flavours. So I sticked with Linux Mint. Im not saying its perfect, but I have it for like a month now and all its flaws are these small irrelevant settings not working, utilities like the battery showing funny numbers in the post I linked in the beginning.
Other than this I want to ask you guys. In all 3 distros I tried, they all had text scaling issues everywhere (os, apps, web). I think I have a regular fullHD display, its sharp, but I mean... I never expected resolution or scaling issues or things like that. On Windows I never had those scaling issues... other than the famous win10 "blurry apps"3
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