Maybe not as much a question as a request for advice.

What I'm looking for is a free website hosting service that preferably lets you import your own source code. If it's got paid services for access to things like your own custom url and such, that's just fine. :) It's a for a hobby group project with people that aren't necessarily programmers in any way.

What we've checked so far is just Svenska Domäner, which have a site builder tool, but the custom source code feature is a paid service.

Since there's so much to choose from in this field I thought I'd check with some of the people I trust the most in these kinds of things. :) Any good suggestions?

I hired a woman for senior quality assurance two weeks ago. Impressive resume, great interview, but I was met with some pseudo-sexist puzzled looks in the dev team.

Meeting today. Boss: "Why is the database cluster not working properly?"

Team devs: "We've tried diagnosing the problem, but we can't really find it. It keeps being under high load."

New QA: "It might have something to do with the way you developers write queries".

She pulls up a bunch of code examples with dozens of joins and orderings on unindexed columns, explains that you shouldn't call queries from within looping constructs, that it's smart to limit the data with constraints and aggregations, hints at where to actually place indexes, how not to drag the whole DB to the frontend and process it in VueJS, etc...

New QA: "I've already put the tasks for refactoring the queries in Asana"

I'm grinning, because finally... finally I'm not alone in my crusade anymore.

Boss: "Yeah but that's just that code quality nonsense Bittersweet always keeps nagging about. Why is the database not working? Can't we just add more thingies to the cluster? That would be easier than rewriting the code, right?"

Dev team: "Yes... yes. We could try a few more of these aws rds db.m4.10xlarge thingies. That will solve it."

QA looks pissed off, stands up: "No. These queries... they touch the database in so many places, and so violently, that it has to go to therapy. That's why it's down. It just can't take the abuse anymore. You could add more little brothers and sisters to the equation, but damn that would be cruel right? Not to mention that therapy isn't exactly cheap!"

Dev team looks annoyed at me. My boss looks even more annoyed at me. "You hired this one?"

I keep grinning, and I nod.

"I might have offered her a permanent contract"

"A good programmer is someone who always looks both ways before crossing a one-way street." - Doug Linder

Another dev on my team just got a new machine. Before he came in today I made two separate USB installers and left him these notes.

Client: We have a HUGE security problem.

Me: *thinks about any possible vulnerabilities* What is it?

Client: A user can take a picture of our website and steal our content.

I’m done for today.

Professor : Explain deadlock and I will give you full marks.

Me:- You give me full marks and I'll explain deadlock.

This made me laugh hard

At the top of a 2000+ line source file

Support in the nutshell.

HTTP response code cheat sheet
(From /r/Programmer humor)

The ability to choose a superpower daily.

I'd replace the '+' in this week's question with '&'

"Are you familiar with uploading your code to Google Drive?"

I left the building at that exact moment.

Answer: Very Slowly!

devRanters, meet Gia85
Gia85, meet the devRanters

@Gia85 be like...

I gave several of you fellow ranters a little gift of "mass ++" tonight and I bet you're wondering why. I'm new to this rant and everyone has been very kind and open. Anyone that commented or ++ any of my rants received a "serial liking." @Letmecode is still my favorite ranter =)

I put an Easter egg into a product, that if you enter the string "final countdown" into the stock code search field, it plays a YouTube vid of Europe's "The Final Countdown", in a hidden div. It's an in-joke for a few people in the company.

A well meaning maintainer with no sense of humour or judgement takes over and goes on the warpath against any hardcoded strings. The secret code gets moved into a config file.

A third developer changes the deployment script so that it clears any configs that aren't explicitly set in the deployment settings.

So the secret code is now "".

Literally every PC in the stock buying department is now blaring out "The Final Countdown" at top volume.

...Except none of them have speakers, so it remains this way for over a year and two more changes of maintainer.

I just noticed this afternoon and quietly re-hardcoded the string. The buying dept.'s PCs will silently sing no more.

THERE IS ACTUALLY A REPOSITORY ON HOW TO ANNOY DEVELOPERS.
WOW. JUST WOW.

https://github.com/omidfi/...

http://howtoannoyawebdeveloper.com

Walking on water and developing software from a specification are easy if both are frozen.

General advice: If you're the smartest person in the room, you're in the wrong room.

Me: I need a Windows PC to test my code on.
Server dude: We don't have any free, but I can setup an old server for you.
Me: 🤔 .. I'll take it!

Let's be honest ... we are rock stars!

Co-incidence??

Finally a keyboard made for waffling on about how your indentation character choice is strictly superior to the other option

Co Worker: "Your computer is missing a mouse!"
Me: "I require less dependencies to use a computer"

BBUUUURRRRNN

404 romance not found

My boss caught me out the other day. He asked which browser do we test on. In our documentation it's ff chrome and ie10. In reality it's not ie.

I opened ie for the first time in a long time the other day to find a crap load of bugs. Including the attached.

Don't you just hate it when you are writing up a report and this happens.. ugh,the frustration!

😂😂😂😂😂

When the team isn't holding anymore