Details
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Skillshtml, css, js, php, sql and so...
Joined devRant on 12/4/2019
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Me: So, let me clear this out. On ship course detail page is main header fixed to the top. Phone number fixed to the left side and subnavigation fixed under the main header when it reaches the top. From start it is fixed to the bottom.
Designer: Yes.
Me: Client also want chat icon on right bottom corner and usual cookie bar on the bottom. Both elements has fixed position.
Designer: Is this problem?
Me: Do YOU think this is problem? -
He: Hi Lexter, our client made a website on WIX.
Me: And he wants to remake the website due to SEO, shit code, design and all other aspects.
He: How do you know?
Me: Realy?3 -
I've been healthy since spring. I follow all precautions. Now I've been diagnosed with covid, at Christmas and I feel like shit. I hope I don't lose my taste.
Realy, fuck me...8 -
I: I see, this web contain user functions, like registrations, product adding, details editing and many other stuff. Can i ask one question?
Client: Sure.
I: Why designer did not designed those elements?
Client: You can do it better directly from the code.
Should i be mad or delighted? I have no idea. -
Whenever client say to me, Honzo, you are magician. How can you do this job?
My respond is: https://youtube.com/watch/....
They all feel a bit disappointed. -
It was actualy funny when normal wordpress developer look into my Login page template and see what is in attachment.
He: Where the fuck is template? -
When grafic designer design a list of products where on top of the page is header with title, category description, big fucking image, big fucking category navigation and on second screen list of the products.
Just why? Why put the important stuff (products) on second screen? Just why? You have three asses of space, you fucker. You can put category list on fucking SIDE. How many time you did this shit?
What about multilevel categories when menu just show current category children? I need to go fucking back or what? FUCK YOU! Stick this stupid boxes into your ass and design real navigation.
What is so fucking great to having big ass monitors and design more and more one column websites, just why you fucking retard?4 -
Honzo, can we make this website responzive?
Looking ito code:
position:absolute; position:absolute; position:absolute; position:absolute; position:absolute; position:absolute; position:absolute; position:absolute;
Response: Sure.
Client: Cost?
Me: Much.4 -
I thinking about new PC with around 1500 USD budget.
1) I don't play new games, so there si no need for more powerfull PC.
2) I'm mainly coder, PHP developer and sometimes graphic designer, so there is no need for more powerfull PC.
3) PC is also used as multimedia centrum, so there is no need for more powerfull PC.
Sometimes i have wierd thoughs.24 -
Just, just don't be an ass and wear a mask and wear it in right way, ok? I'm fine, my work is not really affected by Covid, but many others are in deep fuck. It not cost much, just sacrifice a little comfort. Please.
Czech republic9 -
Designer:
Responzivity looks little off:
I:
1) Yep, by default all elements are excesively large, so i need to do many breaks to fit all scenarios and keep important informations in first few screens.
2) Sometimes you follow 1280 max-width, sometimes 1440, sometimes others. It is hard to achieve some consistent look on smaller devices than your biiig monitor.
3) Design is heavily dependent on large and various images with text overlay. In some scenarios text become unreadable.
4) You did not design a responzive version in first place, so FUCK OFF! I just trying to do my best to fix your shit because you suck as hell!
Escaled quickly, but i'm so tired of this idiot.5 -
I bet you, this time will fucking come.
Minimum requirements for access this website:
CPU - 1.8 GHz Intel Core 2 Duo
RAM - 1 GB of ram
Hard Drive - 500 MB of free space
Video - 1 GB RAM
Recommended requirements for access this website:
CPU - 2.4 GHz Intel Quad Core
RAM - 2 GB
Hard Drive - 500 MB of free space
Video - 4 GB RAM
<requirements></requirements>8 -
Do you prefer:
$order->getShippingAddressCountry();
or
$order->getShippingCountry();
Fuck me, being a perfectionist slows me down.
Beign stuck on: Save that shit as address_shipping_country or shipping_country is purely stupid, i know.6 -
Hm, is **website** progressive enhancement still a thing?
Please be welcome into slaughter discussion. I just read some articles today and i'm realy curious what your thoughts are.18 -
I just animating third type of button. Now i have.
.link.type-button - standard button with default, primary and destruct color, small, default and large size, animation on it's back, selectable icon.
.link.type-roll - wierd type of button, with only icon visible and text on hover with some wierd shit animation, selectable icon ofcourse. Various sizes and colors as well.
.link.type-more - More or less static link with right arrow and ofcourse animation on hover.
So one site has three types of buttons with various properties.
And thinking about how overengeneered JS world is.
Fuck you JS world.6 -
Damn, why you don't want integrate twig in your framework? Why you using latte?
{% if blah %}
<div>{{blah}}</div>
{% endif %}
<div n:ifcontent>{$blah}</div>
Fuck TWIG. Give me break already you TWIG suckboy.
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Sorry guys, i just want to send this to some ass publicly.19 -
My disciple: Hi, i want to learn JS, can you provide me some good resource?
I: I'm not absolute-expert on JS, but i can provide you something you can study.
My disciple: What is it?
I: alert(9999999999999999);
Let me know when you figure it out, i'll give you another resource.
---
This will take a looong time.2 -
1) Read the ticket.
2) Create a branch with ticket number in name.
3) Move ticket to Working now section.
4) Make some changes according to the ticket.
5) Commit changes to branch. Than pull it.
6) Create pull request and submit it.
7) Move ticket into In review section.
8) Move to another ticket.
Tickets:
#7 - Change background size in product item.
#8 - Add icon to info flash message.
#9 - Add adaptiveHeight parameter to the slick slider.
Done, now another 30 tickets...
Yep, this is my workflow i'm forced to now.2 -
Devrant avatar builder is cool, like geek tool for geeks with no real value. They are all the same and not helping with personalization of posts or comments. Is there any chance to upload real image?
Or will be?
Haha, kill me.5 -
He: Honzo, you are great coder, but can you please stop using those sexy anime chicks as placeholder images in your templates?
I: Ups, i forgot replace them.
He: Don't worry, client also enjoy it, but he maybe is only one. He also want to know where you found them.
I: Konachan.com
What can i say, i have exciting work.24 -
Guys, seriously, i dying from writing documentation. I'm frustrated and bored to the hell. But i need it for others. How to keep my mind fresh and excited? Just looking inside Leximo and see how much i need to write. https://repository.cartio.dev/lexim...
I need a coffee.16 -
I hate this trend. Take up the whole screen for one big nothing. Yep, 1920x1080 is apparently not enough to show me more than motto, one link and freaking big image nobody care about.
Fuck, i must code it. Oh damn, there is 8 same sections on the whole page. Don't worry, not a single one of them worth reading! FUCK YOU designers!15 -
I: Sure i can code this event calendar. We have two options. Adjust design and use plugin like fullcalendar. I can adjust the look pretty fast and cheap. Second option is code this from scratch. It will look and act exactly the same as design but will be bit expensive. You know, whole javascript, CSS, HTML and so. Basicaly like entire new calendar plugin or so.
He: Client already saw the design and we do not have high budget.
I: Ok, no problem, let's use fullcalendar.
He: Designer promised to him to be exactly like design.
I: Without asking developer for solution in available price range and time frame?
He: Hm...
I: Good luck.
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It's just funny.1 -
There are many issues with designers. Let's skip hamburger fuckups, navigations on bottom or other stuff. What pisses me of most are tables. Simple tables. As many times as i remember i told them: plaease, design this table with full borders around cells. Your design will make problems with rowspans a cellspans. Why you keep doing that? This is not like tables list in your fucking IS, where you tracking your shitty designers tasks.
How to talk with them? Blow their dicks off before discussion so they feel happy?
But you know, i'm just coder... I have no main word on design things.10 -
When another "front-end developer" appends the entire bootstrap CSS file to your templates because it needs to align two elements. To templates that never included any css framework cuz i hate them... Then he asked me for help because it did not work... I fixed an invalid CSS file reference.
FUCK HIS LIFE9 -
So i wrote complex, great WP framework using parts of nette, latte template engin, shit tons of my code, has many usefull features. Is fast, puting barier between me and WP shit. You have no idea how fast my development is now.
Now, i writing eshop component, looking good, working great, is extendable, fast and so.
Reason 1: WP is piece of shit, woocommerce too, CMB has no fucking sense, fuck ACF and many other WP tools.
Reason 2: I'm too lazy to read.
Question: I spent months of coding, looking for ideas, and make tenths implemenations because:
1: WP is piece of shit, woocommerce too, CMB has no fucking sense, fuck ACF and many other WP tools.
2: I'm too lazy to read.
Please decide, i honestly don't know.1 -
Designer: The web design muset be beautiful, clean and follow modern trends.
Me: Actualy no, design should be just functional part of website. There is no need to be beautiful, clean and has nothing to do with modern graphic trends. Sad truth is almost nobody, besides css galleries, cares.
Designer:2