I think I'll never going to get a devRant stress ball, so i made this instead with my pretty low budget (0.5$).

client: i want to make an e-commerce site.
.
.
developer: how much are you willing to spend?
client: i'm on a tight budget, as cheap/low as possible.
.
.
web development on a budget y'all :------)

Boss: "I looked at a testing suite. It is $2,500 a license and I'm buying 60 licenses. You should probably get familiar with it."
LeadDev: "Um, we already use NUnit, and it's free."
Boss: "Hmm...I'd better add Pluralsight training in the budget so you can learn about the new program."
LeadDev: "Oh, no...we need new laptops more than we need software."
Boss:"New laptops? Not my budget. When we buy this new software, everyone is going to use it"
LeadDev: "Everyone? How will you monitor it's usage?"
Boss: "I'll have networking send me captures of all the running tasks on the dev machines. The test suite better be running. Writing good tests will be our #1 priority."
LeadDev: "Um, we already write tests using NUnit."
Boss: "I don't understand what you are saying. I need something I can visualize. This UI testing suite is exactly what I need."
LeadDev: "Maybe the testing suite would be better suited for you and QA?"
<click..click>
Boss: "Submitted the budget. There will be a test server available for you to configure. This whole project costs over $100,000, so don't screw it up. Any questions?"
LeadDev: "Oh...well...what server ..."
Boss: "Dang...sorry, I'm taking off the rest of the afternoon. We'll talk about this more on Monday. Get started on those Pluralsight videos. I'll expect a full training and deployments by next week. Have a great weekend!"

Client: I want a mobile game with Leaderboards, Social media sign-ins, In-game store, Ads, IAP etc in 2 months

Me: Cool, what’s your budget?

Client: $50

Client: We want a mobile shooting game with multiplayer, In-app purchases, leaderboard and stuff and you should also help us in publishing it.

Me: Cool what’s you budget?

Client: max $100.

I never replied again.

Boss: Hey build me a server.
Me: OK. How much storage.
Boss: IDK.
Me: How many processors?
Boss: IDK.
Me: How much RAM?
Boss: IDK.
Me: 1U or 2U or bigger?
Boss: IDK
Me: What’s it for.
Boss: [Program]
Me: How many concurrent connections?
Boss: IDK.
Me: Budget?
Boss: IDK.
Me: *eye twitch* oooooookkkkkk

Client: Can you build a Snapchat clone but better?

Me: I’m going to say probably not logical given the resources they have and what we have, but for curiosity, what kind of budget do you have?

Client: $2500.

Me: Get out.

My boyfriend is in dental school and I am, of course, a dev. So we often swap analogies to help each other better understand what we are talking (or usually complaining) about. My favorite one so far is when I was explaining to him how the sales team undersells websites without consulting developers and we are constantly over budget. So he goes, "That's like the receptionist telling the patient they have 2 cavities just by looking at them and having them pay immediately. And when the dentist takes a look, the patient actually needs 4 crowns and a root canal... but they already paid for just the 2 cavities."

Client expectation vs client budget

Clients be like

Not a dev post, just wanted to share :) just for your viewing pleasure - My first pics taken using a low budget camera and ‘scope.

*only developer at firm and client comes in to discuss building a website on a 4k budget*

"Ok but eBay does it, cant you just do it like eBay?"

Oh eBay who has teams of developers....and a huge budget to afford these developers.....that eBay?

Client's expectations VS Client's budget

Sometimes it just feels really good to see recruiters getting burned. A stupid one recently posted:

"When you find the candidate that has 15 years of experience in AWS, has a PhD in Artificial Intelligence, speaks 6 languages and is under budget... "

The comments immediately mentioned that AWS was formed 12 years ago.

Haha, what a stupid fuck!

Freelancing website be like: I need a Rolls Royce with high-quality leather and with perfect temperature control. I will also need a mini fridge for my champagne bottle and two wine glass holders. I don't think there's a lot of work to be done in it. It's an easy job.

Budget: $30

Client: You can develop a e-commerce system for me right?

Me: Yeah sure, whats your budget?

Client: 100$ and I want a really good vps included in the price.

** FManzi left the conversation **

No more work for inexperienced

So my company is hiring only amateur developers, Including me.So that they can save on budget . So we have no one to guide us and ambitious deadlines are set .

Me, a 19 year old student at a meeting with a "potential new project" today:

Her: So, we would like a website where people could rent a conference room, and pay for it on the website. After they have paid, we want automated emails to go out to us and the person that rents the room. We basically want an automated rental system.
Me: Sounds fair, what kind of budget do you have in mind?
Her: Well because you are a student and you still live at home, we have a budget of about €200 (~$220). We thought it'd be fair because you don't really need an income yet.

At that point I slowly tried to fade away from the meeting... Please help me 😭

I wonder what the budget was to just increase the border width of the ghost.

Client brief vs Client Budget

Here is the equivalent of every single mid sized "php" project listed on freelancer now:

I'd like a custom designed electric car.
Budget: $750.

And in 1999:

I need a literal pile of dog poop.
Budget: $10,000

yeeeah, seems legit xD

EDIT: programs like internet xD I'm dying

high expectations on low budget.

A client asked me to work on a new website for them. They setup a WordPress site with a basic theme and asked for the following additions:

- Job application system
- Employee management
- Employee scheduling/holidays
- Online clock-in/out and pay calculation
- Training videos/modules for employees with progress tracking

And their budget... $75

😄🔫

Few phrases you should not say at Job:

1. That's not my job
2. We've tried that before
3. There's no budget for that
4. I told you so
5. That doesn't follow procedure

Comment if you have more.

PM: Guys, we have to upgrade Java 8

Me: hey check out all these cool functional programming stuff (lambdas)in Java 8.

PM: Sorry you can't do that. Our automated testing software isn't up to date to test Java 8. So you have to code it "vanilla"

Me: Erm, upgrade it?

PM: we didn't budget it for that.

Me: *thinks to me miself* brilliant

Client: Could you build me a clone of this app? *Link to an app that probably took a full team of developers a year to build*

Me: What's your budget look like for this?

Client: About 500 bucks.

Pretty much a daily conversation.

"Why does the search take so long?" maybe because it searches through2 dbs with 20 tables with 5.000.000 objects on an 6 year old server with hdds and apparently there is no budget for a new server, but there is money for an 40.000€ art piece.

"I need you to reduce the budget on this project you have already delivered."
- Actual client.

Newest additions to my 3rd country, high school student, under-budget working....er....station? I'll just call this my "computer bed" from now on.

Fuck my fucking life. Laptop of about 6 years is finally giving up on life and I don't have a big budget right now..

Anyone advice on a new pc? I want a desktop one this time. 16gb ram minimal.

😥

covid

Suddenly it hits me.
It’s 01:20 here but i get it.
It’s ALL a budget thing.

No dedicated tester means less expenses.

No personal parkspot?
No expenses!

And no good staging or testing environment? Less expenses!

Meanwhile every developer can setup, work on, and maintain about 20 websites on their shitty local Windows machine, that doesn’t even have a proper SSD installed, and we are setting impossible deadlines to figure out who will sink and who will swim.

Ow, here is a SSD.. Figure out the installation yourself because we have no IT knowledge or budget for people that do.

You want a challenge? How about 40 other people that are distracting you all day long.

Meanwhile everybody has to improve their skills in js, react, html5, ccs3, angular, .net and razor so money can made faster.

It would be nice if you could build apps as well.

You had a question? Sorry, no time. Expect some feedback 14 days later.

You finished the site?
Great!

But here are 101 bugs to solve before next week.

All hail their crazy company!

Client: Can you build a Webshop and make it SEO,SEM and advertising-friendly?
Me: I COULD TRY. Whats your budget?
Client: Up to 400€
At this point I slowly faded away.

Client: "I'd like something like eBay..."

Do you answer:

A) Use eBay
B) You'll need more than the £250 budget you've set
C) Please leave and never bother me again

I have colleagues that enjoy only drinking, nothing wrong so far but those guys are ordering a lot of crates monthly on the company budget.

You can see it as part of the fun or making the workplace enjoyable, what's wrong with having some relaxed atmosphere?

The funny fact that each developer has an education budget and guess what? you can't even claim it, the manager said no to conferences, if you want to get a book or training he will come up with 1000 excuses.

So when the company priority is spending thousands on drinks and ignore education and growth don't expect the motivated developers to stick longer.

"Are you going to finish this part or am I going to need to hire someone else?"

~ Asked by a client less than a week into cleaning up and upgrading his Drupal 6 site to Drupal 7 which hadn't been touched in 8 years... Right after pleading with me about how he had no budget and couldn't afford any hours of development.

My IT team installed Antivirus on my 5 year old Mac Mini due to company security policy after the recent Ransomware attacks.
Now my Mac is slow as fuck. They are not even providing me new Mac, due to budget constraints. Totally fucked.
Fuck Ransomware. Fuck security policies. Fuck my company. Fuck everyone. Fuck everything. 😤

Juste design a new algorithm to evaluate the chance of a project (any kind of project) will exceed the budget (time of cost). This algorithm been proven to be right almost all the time.

Client be like: I need a simple app. Should take only one week.
App: I need a Facebook clone will all functionality. :)
Estimated budget: 20$

Client (big company selling luxury vehicles):
- "We need to replace analytics system on our website"
- "Since it is almost useless"
- "Our company deserve something better, google analytics is not simply enough"
- "Can you program it for us?"
- "We have already arranged budget for that project"
- "Like 200 euros, that must be enough"

Lol

my employers' budget and my wallet for job :((

What client wants vs client budget

Budget: $2000

Not awkward, just annoying. Had a recruiter call me out of nowhere and then try to pressure me into immediately declaring my salary expectations straight up saying "so we know you're not wasting our time". You're the one calling me, asshole; I tell him to state his budget so I know he's not wasting my fucking time. He named a sum that was laughable, especially knowing this company offered much more in their own listing.

When client want a huge project with low budget

Need advice;
Build a server or a gaming pc?
Budget: $2000

Hahahahahahahahahha I'm not going to do anymore of your "quick" projects that result in shit pay and drain me out. I got actual fulfilling projects I enjoy working on hahahahah not again "friend". The audacity of this guy to ask me to handle a big project alone while he sits on his ass and gets a 50% cut. He should have paid attention in school if he wanted to be a programmer. All he does is lie to clients that he can code yet runs to me to do all the work. Hahahah let's see how he gets out of this one. Not gonna help you today "friend".

I get handed an API spec that has no naming convention followed for any of the JSON properties. Different for both GET and POST. I request fixes and get a "no budget" answer.

"Why does my app have so many bugs!?"
"Why does literally nothing work!?"
"How come you cant fix these problems soon enough?"
...
Me: "remember how you didnt account for testing in the budget or development plan?"
"No"
Me: "thats why."

Client asks for website and budget very low and wants a form with dB. Think WordPress site is a solution. Build site.
Deliver site.
Client's IT team unable to deploy on server. They blame me for bad "code".
I have to go to their office and help them deploy on local machine using WAMP.
2 days and 100s of calls later, website installed on test server. Works fine.
All is well

I was given a 1700 nzd budget to make my own computer.

The mouse i threw in with my own money. I went 150nzd above budget and the rest is coming during the week.

Its going to be my first custom computer. And im fucking excited like its christmas back when i was 7 years old!!!

That's so true.. when those who will actually perform the work are excluded from the estimating process !

What do you think about it?

When the client asks you to build him a website "like" booking.com but his budget doesn't even pay a weekend on a cheap hotel...

Why is it so damn hard to get publicity for an open-source project? I mean it's almost impossible to get anyone to even notice you. I've been trying to promote my project in every kind of social media imaginable and still I can't reliably get 50-100 unique visitors to my Github repo in a day. I thought writing the code was the difficult part, but clearly the no-budget marketing is what will be my demise.

Bought a macbook air last day with available budget i had - my first apple machine. I find it funny that, I learned cool trackpad gestures on my old Windows laptop that i didn't even know existed! - only because i spend few hrs with this macbook.

Thanks apple.

Client : I have a big budget for this Project

*delivers price*

Client : We have to go lower with the Price or I see myself forced to hire an indian developer

background : Client wasted over 70.000£ in the last 10 years on his Logistics Website. Why ? Kept hiring cheap "global leading it companies" from India

Hello World!

Migrating to my first Thinkpad (E585), something that I've wanted to do for a long time. I've heard a lot of great things and I wanted that sweeeet performance boost over my budget craptop (partially pictured).

> Ryzen 5 2500U
> RX Vega 8 integrated
> 8GB DDR4
> 256GB NVMe
> It's a thinkpad
> Runs Gentoo Linux and I swear I've spent the entire weekend learning and configuring it (my first time)

Asking to deliver a project in a week which should have all the functionalities of Airbnb. Best part is to do that with 200$ budget 😡😡😡

"I have the best idea in the world" Starts defining reddit with paid content curators. Says that after we develop this "nobody will need to use Google again". Arranges a team of +20 people. Budget is 5000 €.

My JetBrain studient licence is over ... :'( RIP i dont have budget to buy good IDE.

welcome back VScode

"Could you make me a nice logo really quick? I have no budget"

.. sure, just let me press the "make Logo"-Button in Illustrator

Freelancing sucks. "A good developer told me this should take a couple hours." Or "I need an Uber like app with built in payment and social integration. We have a $50 budget and it shouldn't take more than a day or two to build." Or "I need a simple game built. Should work on Apple and Android. No budget but we could work out a share of profits." Really wish I had a real job...

Upwork Job post:
I want a small website where you can post product images with title, price and descriptions. It should have a search functionality like amazon. The users must be able to add products it in their cart, post reviews and buy from there. I want it to integrate with PayPal and other payment methods. And yes, i want to be able to write blog post too.

Budget; $50

XD

Worst part of being a dev...working for a company that doesn't understand your potential. Knowing that you can do so much more than they are but being limited due to a myriad of excuses, budget, time, user base, etc.

Finally got approved to bring on a second developer for a three month project. Our vendor provided 12 of their "best" candidates, and we picked the only three that actually knew the programming language required to interview. Two did not speak sufficient English and the last one sounded perfect. Two weeks in, he quits and doesn't answer the vendor or us. No money in the budget to try again and I end up developing the entire thing myself. Five months later and I have finally finished.

man fuck miners. I;m trying to build an budget pc build for my cousin, and every singe meh card is fucking overpriced thanks to miners. I hope they get fucked over in the ass

So, the company I’m working for is finally merging with its sister company. That means budget for upgrading our infrastructure. And guess who volunteered to be in charge of it, and future sysops. That’s me.

Previously we haven’t had anything close to a sysops, and our servers has been neglected and never updated nor upgraded since 2012. We even had a Windows Server 2012 running with rdp wide open...

Just in time. This is my small home setup

The other month i went into work, excited to actually get something done. On top of that it was yearly bonus day. Quick check on adp to see the bonus and nothing there. Email my boss and ask whats up. Ten minutes later i am unemployed after two years because of a cultural fit. No warnings, nothing bd said about my work, made all the deadlines. Guess they didnt want to say budget cut. Haven't replaced me yet.

Got this in my mail, so I placed a bid to deliver for $10 in 24 hours. Wish I could insert a smaller amount.

Client wanted a website to offer rentals for her collection of student rental properties. She was adamant and stipulated that it had to be the Rightmove of student lets. I asked her if she had a £million plus budget for the marketing and then some for the infrastructure and mobile app development. She disapeared. Months later I checked the URL she had purchased and it had been done as a free site on wix.com and was a dreadful piece of shit. You just know instinctively that a client is going to be worthless.

I had to let go of the two people working under me today because somebody fucked up the budget. That sucked.

Company President: No one needs to worry about losing their job due to COVID. We’re an essential business and won’t be effected.

48 hours later

IT Director: There have been severe budget cuts and we are letting go of the two highest salaried employees from every department. You are no longer employed.

Before new years eve I prepared a sheet on google sheets that allowed people to add drink recipes and order drinks (specify how many of each drink they want), calculated part of budget each person had to cover and generated shopping list of drink components with exact amounts needed.
It was more fun to make that thing than to attend the party.

I do IT work along side my dev work. I had a Dr come up to me and ask me if I had time to help him pick out a personal computer... (Mother fucker I am on lunch break) "Sure" I say... "What's your budget, what will you be doing with the computer?" Dr - "I don't mind spending $6,000 and I want it for minor gaming..."

MUST BE FUCKING NICE!

Being sick absolutely deleted what bullshit I can tolerate

- Searching through feed of jobs
- See 999$ Job with description "*platform* forced me to put a budget, but it's not fixed, tell me your quote and what's fair"
- Quote X$ with Y$ interview cost
- Get a message, write and then get the budget "I got offered 10$, 40$, .. if you can do it for 75$ it's a deal!"

ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME, THAT'S WHAT THE FUCKING BUDGET IS FOR, WHY PUT 999 IF YOU KNOW YOU CAN'T SPEND MORE THAN 75 WTF?

Every appraisal meeting ever...

Just changed jobs and learned that this client, a big international company, spent a whooping 2.000.000,- USD on a WordPress that does not work.
My job: clean up the mess they made.
Annual budget: 200.000,- USD
FML.

I told my colleagues that I use excel to budget and they've been roasting me about it ever since.

A Client wanted a Webshop, SEO etc... i was like "sure mate". After a while of talking he said his Budget is around 250€. GG.
Move on, nothing to see here.

TLDR: Don't ask for free support a year after I redesign your site.

Background: Last year I got ask to redesign a non-profit website, they say they had a set budget (note to future self: If someone has a set budget than walk away). I redesigned their (and got it done 5 weeks early). Their happy and only ask for support once.

2018 comes around and someone from the non-profit (a different person since I guess they changes volunteers every year) calls me and basically asks for help on how to change something on the site, I decide to be nice and tell them how to do it, then they contact me a week later with a different question and I decide to just give them the answer (while offering a monthly support contract).

Sometimes I'm just too nice but I guess if you own the business you have to be nice to everyone.

I got my promotion by forcing it. I work at a fairly large gov organization and have done so for 2.5 years. I had been asking for a pay rise for years but was always told there’s no budget. I was doing work way beyond my pay grade as many senior devs had left. Eventually I got really sick of it so applied to another company, took 5 interview rounds but I had an offer that was a 30% raise on my salary at that time.

I submitted my resignation fully thinking that i’m going to leave, but what do you know, my division not only found the budget but did so in 2 days to come back with a counter offer. It’s funny how when push comes to shove, money that previously didn’t exist just appears out of no where

Reasons why I hate the hospital I work for...

1. NO fucking budget, for fuck sakes our telecom system is still running Merlin Magix. (I’ve been working on getting the trunk and everything to at least push FreePBX out... Configuration configuration.) but, that requires a decent server to host said system... But guess what? We’ve still got a few servers online that are running server 2012 r2. NO FUCKING BUDGET.

2. Training. They don’t have the budget to send me to training, but the doctors here are rolling in Mercedes... Must be fucking nice.

3. I have 5 f-I-v-e job descriptions. I’m a bio medical technician, network admin, system admin, programmer, and help desk... I fucked up allowing them to know I program.

4. On call 365 days a year. That’s nice and all, but when I’ve got shit to do and the nearest Walmart is an hour away I don’t want a call from Louis “oh the printer has a jam” FUCK OFF LOUIS! Get the paper out, we’ve been over this, I believe in you!

5. Some of the FUCKING (l)users.... You wouldn’t imagine some of the calls I receive, some of my favorite being late late “Hey *anonyops* I know it’s late but we’re needing a chair moved from one room to the other.” FUCK YOU YOU CHEEKY FUCKING CUNT.

The only reason I’m still here is my direct supervisor and a hand full of people that I’ve grown to love. Also, because any computer related job here is either outsourced or filled by a YouTubing god. - reason 1 why I started my own business. Supply and demand.

Rural Kansas Hospitals = shit, inb4 thanks —insert president to blame—

😂😂😂

Sooooo I got new RAM for my low-budget server today.

Now introducing: 24 GB DDR2 RAM

XD yes I know DDR 2 is slow but very, very cheap ECC memory.

(still not enough for Chrome)

A client just asked to reduce the budget on a project, which I have already delivered. fml. Also, I had a look at wakatime, and realised that I've spent over 100 hours on this project.

Oh LinkedIn.

You were ok back in the day. But after the fifth recruiter in as many days sending a message about "fantastic opportunities for the senior codings with the great salary in a relocation budget friendly area", and the only other messages asking me to celebrate someone's "work anniversary", it may be time to say goodbye.

Finally found a client who thinks TTD and unit tests are useful ways to spend development budget.
Still expecting to wake up.

My company makes us take "courses" such as 'Maintaining a positive attitude towards your company' and 'the downer'(my personal super low budget skit)

FMDL

That awesome moment when a fiverr client wants you to develop a cross platform mobile application that would share your battery charge(actual battery electricity power) via Wifi/Bluetooth. That too for a budget of $5. 🙄

When your website is worth 75 billion and you still can't get your fucking app to work properly...

(Youtube app playing a video in the image)

I had to set up a Raspberry Pi just to display a webpage since it is inexpensive and I didn't have enough budget to get a case for it so I present my homemade case. Lol. It's zip tied to the box within another box.

Potential client: "We need this project done, but don't have much of a budget. But, if it's successful, could result in a lot more work."

If you want me to invest in your company, offer stock.

FFS.

Yea 5$ for this is awesome!
Why dont u offer less for this?

If your client doesn't know what the fuck he wants to see on his website even with all text and images included - don't take this fucking job.

They will let you choose a template and you end up switching it 5 times. "Oh we don't like it. What else do you have? Oh, this looks better." Next day "We don't like this theme anymore. We want to switch to what we had before."

If people can't draw their home page on a paper I tell them go fuck yourself straight in a face. I always put these people on my reference list so my future clients know I'm straightforward, not lazy, not low skilled, but honest with dumbasses like some of my previous clients.

You are asking for a basic website with 5 pages, you have a shitty budget and then I have to customize the entire theme and tweak every fucking possible element in CSS, HTML and PHP. Go fuck yourself. All you get for your money is WordPress with 15 min consultation how to copy paste your shit and save it. Never do fixed budgets, never work on projects like this if it's under $500-1000. Meet with the client to understand him/her better and see if he is a jackass-perfectionist or a chill person who won't be picky.

That's my memories of being a freelancer, trying to get any job for any budget just to build my portfolio. Never going back to this, at least not for small businesses with less than $5,000 budget. Reading people before you start working with them is a good thing.

2 in 1

How I fucking hate people that are over apologetic, but don't actually learn anything out of it, maybe next time you do the same fucking mistake again, I'll shove a fucking spiked metal rod up your ass and twist it, so next time you sit down you seemingly still fucking feel it and remember to check beforehand to avoid the fucking issue, you fucking buffoon.

--

Another thing I'd stick a rusty crackneedle pipe up somebodys internals is "for each day late we will penalize 500$ from the budget" while the budget is like 2k, go fuck yourself and eat your cash, with your "30 day challenge" job, you fucking cumstain.

Client: We are in a tight budget, but you'll get a lot of exposure
Me: NO! I have enough exposure on my camera.. 😉😜

Hey devs, what kind of headphones would you recommend?

I'm looking for high end, but not completely audiophile grade.
My budget is in the $300-$400 range.
Wireless is preferred but not required.

And please, nothing that completely drowns me in bass :P

"we have add a lot of cost partly due to currency exchange rate, but we also added some services and servers, we'll have a meeting and see what we can cancel or re-arrange."

So now....
- JIRA is gone
- SEO tools are gone
- budget for site security & SSL undecided
- Servers are too expensive.
$800 for twelve 2-24gb ram servers with backup, I call that bargain

Can't wait to see the websites falling apart. Now where are my popcorns?

{ “dow”: “10000001,10000002” }

Me: So what does this mean in the JSON response and why isn’t it a JSON collection?
Dynamics guys: that represents the days of the week. Because that is how it comes out of Microsoft Dynamics.

I’m thinking that they are either bad rest API programmers MS is bad at JSON. I can’t see the code so I don’t know which. No fixes because budget.

The shortcut to search solution explorer in Visual Studio is probably a choise made by PM after exceeding the project budget for the functionality.

When requirements and budget do not match

The meeting where your boss over promises a ton of features that are not only completely out of budget, but also completely out of our abilities - so that he can get the sale to pay his 2 month behind office rent...

A site like moonpig.com with a < £350/$430 budget.

100,000$ budget for a website that mixes all YouTube, Facebook and Twitter features as per today.

The guy has a lot money to loose. I don't have enough time for this shit.

Which online trainings or certifications are you willing to pay money for? I'm just trying to get rid of the budget they gave me for training because I can't convert it to cash.

Budget setup! Third monitor on the left is waiting for a cable. The bigger monitor is a 27'' that i got for 15€, the vertical one I got for free. Mini itx ryzen setup behind the monitors. Chinese mechanical keyboard with outemu blue switches

I really don't like billing time for things I am not really sure how to do and need time to educate myself on. This happens more often than my wallet is comfortable with and I spend more time learning than making money. How do you go about staying in an estimate or fixed budget when something comes up that you don't know anything about?

When graphic design agency hands over inconsistent, partly done "desktop" A4-layout made in 2 days in InDesign. "Okey developer guy, make it responsive, magically. Oh, and pixel perfect!!" Design agency takes 40% of the budget. Never again.

!rant

I appreciate the aws budget alert.

Macbook or Microsoft Notebook?
I have a budget of 1600€.
I need it for developing mainly c# and web-dev.

Top devs, massive budget, ultimate teachers... And the guys from MIT came up with this

How you look when your customer tells you that you can not pay the rest of the budget accepted and completed, within two weeks because he has to change the four wheels of his BMW 4x4 :O

Concierge shopping service in 2001. You input what you want and your budget and a human concierge will research and get you the best deal with coupons, rebates, etc. The idea was good before e-commerce algorithms got better. Before that you had to find good prices across numerous sites on your own and it was super tedious, hence my idea. Also, it wasn’t scalable as it depended on humans way too much.

"I am the code of my program
HTML is my body and CSS my blood
I have created over a thousand websites
Unknown to Google,
Nor to hosters.
Have withstood sleep to create many websites
Yet those hands will never earn anything
So as I pray, limited budget works"

Fuck, I did not know it was possible to wait this long for something to boot up. Too scared to even install Visual Studio.

Downgrading from my own i7 pc with 16GB ram and an ssd to a company i3 budget laptop with 4GB ram and 5400rpm HDD.

Could never understand all this bitching about Windows 10 and how it is shit slow, but I have come to realize what everybody has been complaining about.

My foolishness of giving into an almost impossible dream seems to be finally setting in.

So the client, who is also my relative is launching an hotel. He wanted a website for the hotel with booking facility. The budget was plenty for that requirement and I was okay. In my calculations 20% of the proposed budget seemed fair to charge.

Few months in, it turns out he now wants a hotel booking platform where other hotels can also be listed. The reasoning was he wants to avoid the commissions charged by popular booking sites and also feature his own hotel in the booking platform that was about to be build.

I was skeptical about his intentions and my skills in developing it. I was also concerned whether he understood the responsibilities and overhead costs of running such a platform. He talked like it'll be fine. I calculated my billing to about 50% of the budget. I left the other 50% intentionally because I knew it would need for keeping up the site.

Time goes by, i am now 90% into completion of the new requirement.

Few weeks ago, i had informed about server pricing and I quoted a starting price of $15 per month. He seemed quite shocked. His reaction shocked me too and I got concerned whether I would even get rest of the payment ( already got 10% of proposed budget ) as advance.

Just few days ago, he now has a new requirement. He wants to show the hotel pricing from the booking site in Google Maps search. I tried to understand him that those are Ads and I was pretty sure price of running those ads are beyond his budget and probably negate any savings he is trying to make by competing popular booking platforms. Signing up for Hotel Ads as a booking platform is quite challenging. I don't think it'll happen.

I am now concerned he might bail on the project, so I have not informed yet. I just hope I get paid for the work I done and I'll inform then. :P

Anyways, the journey of it's development was quite insightful and challenging experience. I fell in love with a language I knew existed but never really bothered about and a framework whose only thing I knew was that it's name sounded cool to say.

Just got my first paycheck. Felt amazing tbh. Proceeded to make a little Python project to help me with high precision budgeting and budget analysis. So, any grad students here who invest and/or save half of their paycheck and use their own code to help them do it?

Got this in Slack from the owner of the firm I work for...

I mean, you already pay me half of the average salary I should be making, but yeah, let me get right on that...

To be fair, I work with this guy because he is a really good guy to work for, is very hands-off (no micro-managing), doesn't expect me to work on the clock or any overtime and lets me make all the calls with our directions in development. Plus he pays me all he can afford, so it's not like he's trying to screw me (he shares the books with me to prove it).

But still, the dude has to realize you get what you pay for. You don't go to McDonalds if you want a gourmet burger...

Been working a year and a half on an offer for a client to plan their new system. Today they wanted us to construct the whole system and call it a beta only to pay 10% of the total costs. They said it is our responsibility to make the budget work as they are merely the "end users and not tech people". I am considering to tell them to go f**k themselves tomorrow.

Why? Just why?

If I have $100000 budget for a Steelcase chair, which one should I buy?

Never include freelance as a budget source in daily expenses. Think of it as a reward only! Now, plans are cancelled T_T

So I still get occasional email from my former employer’s ecommerce mailing list. The budget for live model shoots is nonexistent, so we had to make do with photoshopping products into different scenes. Not ideal but done right it was ok. I’m looking at the latest ad emailed to me and realized something...was...off.

Saving to buy a Mac.

I'm a full stack developer: I do Web Development, Backend Development.

Not a graphic designer but I use Photoshop and Illustrator to modify assets that I receive clients.

What is a good budget Mac Laptop that I can hang on for most of my work ?

tech debt is a b!+ch you can only pay if your client somehow approves the budget for something they will never notice.

Asked my manager at apple what my odds of going from contract to perm looked like. Pretty much said the budget wasn’t originally there and I’d have to compete with the other few contractors and move to Austin and that’s only if a spot even becomes available. I’m pretty beat up over it. I love this position. It’s perfect for me long term. I need this.

- Am a junior dev in an awesome team & exciting project after my apprenticeship and while having just started my part time studies
- Have restructure in company so I land in an other value stream
- Get laid off by new value stream 6 months later (now) because they have a serious budget cut
- Take time to come to terms with situation. I could finally work more on my side projects or focus a bit more on my studies. Hey actually I will have 5 months time to look for something while being paid by the company and they help me brush up my CV. Pretty neat!
- Now my former boss wants me back because of my experience in the project, but only as a production support and not as dev (because budget and they're bleeding with tickets)

Not sure if I should take the offer as it feels safe to have an income and the team is cool. However, it feels a bit like a degradation as prod support sucks in that project and I'd like to code (which wouldn't be possible then).
And as this is still my first company I'm working in, it would make sense to look for something else...

Grrr need to sleep about it... Decision-making isn't exactly my strength.

Guys, serious question.

I work in a startup as a cto. We have a very low budget and considering hiring people offshore.

Does anyone have some experience in hiring and piloting a remote team? Would you recommend it?

Loving my new Mi A1. Budget smartphone king I tell you!

Client approved a design 2 months ago. I follow the design and build functionality based on the design and on budget.

What does client do... Doesn't want the site built says it doesn't follow their paper catalog. What paper catalog? I never got a paper catalog from design to follow. Three additional weeks later rebuilt the core of the site's functionality. And the final cost is 2.5 times over budget. Screw you Unnamed attorney search engine.

Enterprise that "doesn't have training budget".

Meeting #1: We need to cut the budget and can't guarantee anyone will still have their job next fiscal.

Meeting #2: Hey you all need to read this book. It's mandatory and we will have a follow up meeting to talk about it.

All contractors: okay, but just so you know reading this book is billable and is subject to overtime pay.

Director:👍👍Here you go 💰💰💰

All of the FTEs that are salaried: 😶

Android development is so frustrating. Seriously, Android studio is such a bloated piece of... I found that is easier to make apps in open source game engines rather than that headache of a software. On the other end, most of these engines are not supported by my budget laptop because it doesn't have OpenGL...

I just want to give up sometimes.

Client: can you build a website like that for the MissWorld competition and it should have a payment gateway.
Me: what other requirements do you have?
Client: hmmn..just something to showcase our agency.
Me: what's ur budget?
Client: around $100
Me: ** you must be kidding **

I may be getting evicted due to landlord stupidity but at least I survived budget cuts and get to keep my job after internship. The full-time job offer will be emailed tomorrow

Two interns got cut but at least I and another intern survived.
But sadly now I have to go over my friends work and learn what they were doing well enough to continue it with the other survivor

Boss says to give budget for a job. I give budget by associated cost of materials that we use. Simple math device cost x amont, we need y number of x. I give budget of $25k. Boss says that's great, he gave a cost of $10k to customer. We need to work on getting it closer to that.
WTF do you need me for?

We don't call it budget, we(developers) call it poverty 😎😎

Motorola:
It was the only company which used to provide great budget android smartphone with stock android and regular updates. (ranting this on my Moto G3) But from moto G3, they fucked up with promised android OS upgrade (shitty Lenovo)

Microsoft (for fucking with windows 10):
Still remember that first stable build of windows 10 released in 2015. After the first update they never stopped fucking with user's computer with different bugs. Still I haven't seen any build as stable as first one.

Product Owner: Hey, can you guys own this incredibly fragile legacy app built with Grails, Angular and Mongo?

Me: No

PO: Go on. You can rebuild it!

Me: Sigh.. ok

- 6 months later -

Me: When can we rebuild this bloody app??

PO: lol sry no budget lmao!

Arduino project going off the budget and teacher asking for more functionality because "it can be made within 30 mins". We are working for 3 days and only things we are getting to know is new components that we need to add. That too in summer holidays... Fml

friend : bro which phone may I buy?
me : mi / honor

next day
f : bro are you sure?
m : yup pretty sure ,in your budget this 2 are best phone

after 3-4 day
*call*
f : bro I buy phone.
m : congo , which pne ?
f : oppo f9

o(╥﹏╥)o

in the freelance marketplaces, some people write, "Need a freelance developer for SMALL TASK". who the hell defines those tasks as SMALL task? if you knew this is a SMALL task, why don't you just do it yourself? if its so small, why don't you just ignore it? if its a small task, why don't you just spend five-ten minutes of your "precious" time to learn how to fix it?
& then when it comes to paying, they say, "My budget is 5$, because its a small task"
Seriously? in 5$ my electricity bill wouldn't be covered.
& Then comes to the marketplace commission! Most of the times, its about 20%
So, I get 4$
Then it comes to the bank tax and blah blah!
So, now I get around 2$ or 3$
Now, I don't know whom should I kill first -_-
The clients or the marketplace owner or the government or the bank owner or myself :}

Client had this great idea for a business where he would kennel dogs at his house and have a premium upgrade to the service where he would sell dog treats and other items as well as have a private members only area where they could view their dog.
My first question was "Is there any demand from your customers for such things and what type of budget do you have?"
His response was "I don't have much of a budget but I can give you some hockey tickets and give you a stake in the profit."

I politely declined. He didn't even have any cameras in his house to pull off such a thing, either let alone he didn't have a boarding license. Oh clients.

"... and these are all the software specs. But we have no budget"

I need to buy a laptop to replace my 5 year old one. My work is mostly in data science. My budget is really flexible. Any suggestions?

When you decide to create a startup and then look for someone on freelancer.com to create your Million Dollar product with a budget of 750-1500

Are there people here who actually unit/integration/end-to-end/stress test (almost) everything? Or is it a common fact that nobody has time/budget and/or needs to do so?

I like to think I test all the code I write, but to be honest, I think it's closer to 1 to 5%

I set my workspace with accepting the challenge in low budget, simple and gain the comfortness. I wanna listen to ur suggestion in order to improve this lovely workspace? Senpai, guru or master are called !! 🙏🙏

Three years ago I started developing a platformer game on Unity. Really low budget if you consider $0 as funding. I had six levels and it looked really well, the problem though was I got bored

So our sales rep got this email from some random dude yesterday (jan 12) saying he wants a simple webpage with a video background and some shit and that it's upmost important that it's done by jan 21.
Ignoring the fact that we are busy af, i thought well yeah it's doable. A simple onepager with some nice elements and some shit, ez pz.
In the email he also sent a link to a website simmilar to what he wants (as an example i presume) and it turned out to be a fully functional blog, a medium sized webshop (by the looks of it) and a whole lot of other stuff.
He didn't state a budget but seeing his demands I'd say his budget isn't much more than a couple of hundred €.

Where is the best place to pick up freelance work that actually pays a realistic amount?

I’ve been on sites like o-desk where there are folks looking for pretty big jobs and they have a budget of $100.

Fuck you aws.
I forgot to stop extra ec2 and you changed 500 bucks.
Although it is my fault, still aws didn't notify me even after i had set up budget.
Fucking jeff bezos

Dear client. Your web development project budget has no room in it for me to help you fix your broken POP3 mail settings. May the odds be ever in your favor.

Agencies... Just hate when people are given only time enough for doig crap code, because "there is no budget". Hate even more to work on changes on top of it, because people just dont get why you take so long to do changes that supposed to be simple, ignoring the fact that previously they asked for some slap-dash shit. What do they think, that with time the code cleanup and tidy up itself?

I want to buy an oscilloscope, any recommendations? My budget is on the 600 dollars range.

I have spent 5 days in Microsoft Excel trying to do my budget planner. I struggled a lot and too much Googling. Google started to show reCaptcha whenever I search for something after that.

Yesterday, I spent 3 hours and got my fully functionality web based budget planner done.

I don't know if I did the right thing or not but am really happy and I have the full control.

@linuxxx I'm about to found a start-up.

In fact me and my buddy with some freelancing contracts. And we are in need of a dedicated server.

Our plan is to host the clients inside docket container.

Technology would be dotnet core and either react/angular/Vue.js, if that matters.

The host will run on arch, because I feel in love with it! 😍

Do you have any suggestions for a provider for us?

Budget between 100-125€
Location: Germany.

Thanks in advance!

So tired of clients wasting time with "features or changes we absolutely have to have" but after researching planning and estimates "it's just not in the budget right now"

Got fed up of waiting for the carrot on the stick that is 'budget approval' and decided to start using trials of IntelliJ and JRebel rather than eclipse and restarting my server everytime I make a change. Now Ive become so accustomed to it that it feels awful knowing that in 30 days I'm back in the dark ages.

Some people are fucking cheap.
Their web requirements are top tier (3d model e-commerce) but their budget can only get them a whip from satan's dick.

I'm surprised how well Dell laptops are made. I'm using 2011 Dell Latitude E6320 and it really works like more modern models. Of course it would be lovely if I had new XPS 15, but it's really not bad for this budget. It just needs SSD drive and it's ready to roll.

A person asked me to look for parts to build a computer for her. She has a tiny budget and wants to play games. I asked what kind of games and she won't tell me more than "games from steam". She won't even give me an example. Also, she doesn't want to buy parts like the psu and housing used, but I already have problems fiting anything better than onboard graphics into this rediculous budget. Why are many people so ignorant?

Seems the rtx 2060 is the "budget" raytrace gpu at $349

Story time;

Major project, multi million budget, huge business and IT coordination, board level status updates, meeting started back in March 2018 for a Go Live of Aug 2019.

Based on draft requirements (and experience) I request the test environment be built for half of the work. Turns out that no one told Server Eng and they are out of space in both dev and prod until Q2 of 2019. We went from Green to Red because a Service Request.

Release:
1. with all features
2. on time
3. on budget (budgeted resources)

Choose two. Maybe just one. If you try to do all, you may not get any.

Whenever I'm asked if something is possible, I've resorted to responding "With infinite time and resources, anything is possible"

How many sh*t days does it need to make me down?
3 ...

I hate my company, for making everything overcomplicated and annoying.... I have to discuss with 3 peoples for 3 days to getting some gitlab premium licenses (20$ per month for 10 licenses)... Why do you need it? Why we can't use the free version? Why Why Why... It's not enough to tell them it will save us much times and improves the quality of development.....

Also I wanted to ask if we can to Jaxb or another Dev Conference this year... Then I got the information that we have about 2000 Euro for 10 people for training.......... What should we do if everyone buys a book this budget is out .... f*ck company....

Second day, half of the day was taken for fixing the live db on the fly cause of a bad structure of tables... at least fixed some other inconsistence too... later the day fixed a freaking shitty bug with Spring Devtools and 2 Classloader to make the product that I'm presenting in 2 days running.

Today next shitty day with discussion that everything I did last half year (introducing Microservices, Kubernetes, Kafka and other DevOps things) could be maybe useless when the external company will say that they use another ecosystem -..- for their microservices...

Someone looking for a disappointed java developer? I just want to develop the best product ever... I'm happy with every area... Frontend, Backend, DevOps, Fullstack, Architect in some kinds depends on the wishes and technologies.

I'm working in a really really small start up company (I'm the only developer here with the owner being a programming professor in the local uni).
It's my first job after leaving uni and I knew it was a risky decision that I've made but it was my hometown and I could save some extra money by saving on rent and food, also I've always loved a good challenge.
But the challenge isn't working as excepted. It's been a year since I've started here and there was no planning for almost nothing, it's a "do as you think it's best but I'll probably won't like so you have to it again" kind of methodology. Also I've been hire to do an hybrid mobile app and I've ended up doing a full e-commerce website with shitty outdated technology that I've had no experience in using.
So for me I'm more than done. I'm tired of having my suggestions being completely ignored, of the lack of planning and instruction and the fact that I'm being underpaid for what I do.
Fuck it, I'm looking for a new job.

I was discussing scope and budget with a potential client for a side project. It involved a good bit of complex postgresql and subsequent aggregations and creation of reports. He was hiring because the last guy's work was so poorly documented, they couldn't verify its accuracy.

Me: "So, what are your thoughts on a budget?"
Him: "We were thinking something like $15/hour."
Me: "Um...ok. If I can ask, where did you get that number?"
Him: "That's what we paid the last guy."
😑😑😑😑😑😑

Client called, they have enough budget to tap into a new audience 🤔 WHAT?!?!?!?!

Guys help me choose
I need to buy a laptop for development

Dell XPS 13
Thinkpad X1 Carbon
MacBook pro 13" without touch pad
Or something else?

Which one should I go for?
Budget: 1.3L INR (~2000usd)

Advice in building muy first custom PC/workstation.

So the main aim of this computer would be installing Linux, of course! And learning bash.

The second objective is learning Dask and doing some machine learning.

Budget, I dont want the must expensive stuff, because it usually costs double and doesnt perform double.. Second or third tier would be ok.

*this is not a gaming pc

Somewhere on upwork post online.
1. Require backend architecting done for Twitter like app. <more details on app >
2. Client budget: fixed price, 200$

Aye folks, im looking for a 3d printer and i saw some people with one on here, so ill ask, is there like a model that is universally good? Or a manufacturer or something. Budget is 350$ tops.

I just saw some loan/bank ad that read something around the line "when the budget goes negative, the minus becomes plus" ("Când bugetul dă cu minus, minusul se face plus")

NO, this isn't a feature, it's a bug and it's called "underflow"

Client: we would like a fully featured web app with a companion mobile app. Here's what we want it to do

Us: ok nice. What's your budget for this?

Client: $5k

Us: ...

A good way to avoid working for a bad company is that you can spot major problems in the interview and pre-employment phase. There are a number of things that indicate a bad culture that you can ask about right off the bat. Dress code, blocked websites, and work from home policy(or a lack thereof) can all indicate what kind of work environment to expect.

But the biggest one of all is a request for your salary history. If a recruiter or hiring manager wants to know how much you are or were making at a previous job, and will not allow the process to continue without the information, run.

Every job opening has a budget associated with it. The employer already knows what they want to spend on the position. They want to know what your current or previous compensation is or was, so they can perhaps save some money of that budget by offering you a very small amount more than the amount you tell them.

If they ask the question, I get suspicious, but then say, "I'd prefer not to disclose that. What is the budget for the requirement?"

If the person who asks you relents and tells you the budget, then all is well, in my opinion. But if they stick to the subject and insist on getting your salary history, then it indicates a culture of arbitrary subordination, which is not a healthy work environment. If it ever goes this way, I politely tell them that I'm not comfortable disclosing that information, and that I would like to withdraw my interest in the position.

Hey everyone!
I am looking for a decent VPS provider with adequete privacy settings, but most importantly, u guys like and is cheap.
I looked at hetzner (but it rejected my id proof for some reason) and contabo (but it has a one time setup fee which i am reluctant to pay, but will pay if there r no other options).
I'll probably go with the cheapest plan depending on specs.
Budget is $5 😅

thanks ❤️❤️

Two months in my new job, no task assigned to me yet. Not even one. There's been a budget reallocation, and the team just got dissolved. Will probably be moved to a new team (or not?). Part of me enjoys the free time I'm getting (I get to work on my side projects) but it's kind of depressing that I can't prove to the company how much I love building things while at the same time helping the company. 😔

I have two potential client meetings next week. The first one now knows she needs a website (but I have no clue what her budget is), I think she wants me to host the site as well as do site maintenance. The second potential client I'm working using the barter system (but I think she will end up owing me some money at the end). We will see how they both go.

When there's "no budget" to spend time on writing unit tests...

Guys, I'm planning to buy a new laptop for Dev purpose. My budget is under 45K INR. Need a laptop with 8GB RAM and I'm confused about the processor (i5 or i3 or AMD). Please suggest the processor I should choose and some laptop models meeting the above criteria.

Google c'mon.
It's time to release backdrop-filters. Please. Pretty please.

You already support the feature (although a little glitchy) with experimental flags enabled. Can't you finish it? Is it that difficult with your so very limited personal and budget (sarcasm)? At least that could be an excuse for Firefox.

It is not a rant!!!!!

I want to build my own pc for gaming on budget.
Like Under $1000

Please if anyone can recommend the components, write in the comments.

PS: I want a monitor too, outside the specified budget, shall I go for 144hz or a normal monitor.

I am convinced that after this years-over-timeline millions-over-budget website goes live we will all be fired because it is dog shit.

Hi all - mind if I get some advice?

Are coworking spaces worth it? I currently work from home but I'd like the opportunity to network, get out of the house more and build a better work-life separation. The options I'm looking at are in the region of £200-£250 in the city centre (Manchester, UK), which is easily within my budget.

When you set up SonarQube for a project that uses your companies homegrown framework.

Hey Game Developers,
I know this is the worst place to ask this question but still...

Is it possible that a game developer will make an online multiplayer game at a really low budget for me?
If yes then where can I find them?

Budget

There is nothing more beautiful than having to embed legacy shit into an new website because the customer is a cheap arse and doesn't want to budget the whole pissing redesign package of his website.
I hope you choke on the next meal your stinky gullet has to swallow!