No proble

So are we wasting our times getting CS degrees?

Screw Emojis!!

Client asks how many days will it take to implement feature XYZ.

I say 3 days. But Skype had other plans.

- Knock, knock

- An async function

- Who's there?

Software Engineering Matrix

; -) i hope that this is not a repost.

How to vertically center in css..

Am I the only one who's bothered by the fact that in CSS, "!important" doesn't mean "not important" ?

devRant should have a character limit of 1024 instead of 1000...

Just got this slack from our server admin.

All the cheesiness 😂

So true.

I fucking got the job. 😬

The one i am working on in my spare time.

A roomba vaccum that senses when there's cat poop on the carpet and goes around it.

Manager: The thing you working on. We need this now! Like end of the week.

Me: Desirability is not do-ability.

Manager: く( ・◇・)ヾ？

Me: I am still in the middle of figuring out how to do things in the first place, so there are some technologies to research and some problems I yet need to solve. I am in no state to just write down my solution. I don't even have enough information to even estimate how long it is going to take. I am getting there. And yes, I can rush things, but need I remind you that you want solid data as a result that actually means something? As this is *why* this whole project was started. We have some old project doing the exact same thing, but whose output we don't trust. I wonder how that came to be. Additionally, this whole project was on hold for months until I took over. So I neither understand nor accept this sudden sense of urgency. And by the way, you recently added manpower to this project. And adding manpower almost always decreases the productivity in the beginning due to on-boarding and communication overhead. Last Monday, I didn't write a single line of code due to that. So no, this week will not do, as I am also on vacation starting on Thursday that was requested and was approved by you at the beginning of the year. See you in January.

Travelling salesman problem. 😂😂

When you've gotten too used to Jetbrains IDEs that you start pressing enter before finishing any word in Sublime and everyone looks at you like you're a retard when you type

This one py2 lib when the rest of the project py3

Programming in a nutshell

Der, Das, Die.

The lack of ++. Seriously, what the hell?

PHP's lack of consistence in naming conventions with built-in functions. For example, str_split() and strlen().

There are two main versions of Python.

When you want to have it work with both of them, things can get really ugly. :(

Resize a image in a document in Microsoft word................ 500 lines realign, border width changes, 4 graphs deleted, tsunami in ur city, earth's orbit shift by 2 meters.u want to die.

Present for my new flat ;)
There is no place like ...

Devrant is getting more boring day by day. Everytime the same shit. Some people see things that are already rated, and just rerant it. Boring.

*Now that's what I call a Hacker*

MOTHER OF ALL AUTOMATIONS

This seems a long post. but you will definitely +1 the post after reading this.

xxx: OK, so, our build engineer has left for another company. The dude was literally living inside the terminal. You know, that type of a guy who loves Vim, creates diagrams in Dot and writes wiki-posts in Markdown... If something - anything - requires more than 90 seconds of his time, he writes a script to automate that.

xxx: So we're sitting here, looking through his, uhm, "legacy"

xxx: You're gonna love this

xxx: smack-my-bitch-up.sh - sends a text message "late at work" to his wife (apparently). Automatically picks reasons from an array of strings, randomly. Runs inside a cron-job. The job fires if there are active SSH-sessions on the server after 9pm with his login.

xxx: kumar-asshole.sh - scans the inbox for emails from "Kumar" (a DBA at our clients). Looks for keywords like "help", "trouble", "sorry" etc. If keywords are found - the script SSHes into the clients server and rolls back the staging database to the latest backup. Then sends a reply "no worries mate, be careful next time".

xxx: hangover.sh - another cron-job that is set to specific dates. Sends automated emails like "not feeling well/gonna work from home" etc. Adds a random "reason" from another predefined array of strings. Fires if there are no interactive sessions on the server at 8:45am.

xxx: (and the oscar goes to) fuckingcoffee.sh - this one waits exactly 17 seconds (!), then opens an SSH session to our coffee-machine (we had no frikin idea the coffee machine is on the network, runs linux and has SSHD up and running) and sends some weird gibberish to it. Looks binary. Turns out this thing starts brewing a mid-sized half-caf latte and waits another 24 (!) seconds before pouring it into a cup. The timing is exactly how long it takes to walk to the machine from the dudes desk.

xxx: holy sh*t I'm keeping those

Credit: http://bit.ly/1jcTuTT

The bash scripts weren't bogus, you can find his scripts on the this github URL:
https://github.com/narkoz/...

I wish we could branch out our lives like in git. Just fork at critical decision points, try out both/ multiple outcomes simultaneously, then reconcile and merge back into master.

How my day went making a magento exstension, with their shitty documentation