Pretty accurate

When the technically inept PM wants to be included on every single email thread. So then you have to waste even more time explaining.

Bae: come over
Me: can't, tests are failing
Bae: Flatmates aren't home
Me:

Hahaha

trying to auto complete git commands be like: git checkout f..TAB...TAB...WTF!

Hey another issue created, but no steps to reproduce the bug

Press any key to continue..

Fixing bugs like:

40 commits updating the readme.md. I don't feel bad about it

Just wow...

Nothing like staying late at work to finish other people's work that they can't get done in time because they were doing side projects. Nevermind that I have two huge deadlines myself. Getting really tired of cleaning up other people's messes.

A customer was complaining that the twitter feed on their homepage was listing strange tweets containing curses. somehow a JavaScript variable was not assigned correctly and got a value of 'undefined'. because @undefined is an existing twitter handle the code did not crash and went on displaying the wrong tweets.

ctrl+xzcvXZsSawqefddrf

You can keep telling me how to code it, and I can read about how to code it, but until I've successfully coded it in a production environment 5-10 times it's all just theoretical to me.

carbon monoxide sensor was triggered when someone farted.

is this a bug or a feature?

Me on the inside whenever I hear the PM say quick and dirty

Me: " Good morning"
PM: "Why do we need it? Is it in the backlog?"

#3am #realization #truth_hurts

True......

This is way too true.

when can i say " learning is finish and i know anything to make an APP"
every time i open a door i see another closed door. always there is a closed door

A woman in hot air balloon realized she is lost...

She reduced altitude & shouted to a man below: Excuse me, can you help me? I promised a friend to meet him an hour ago but I don't know where I am.

Man below replied: You are in hot air balloon 30 feet above the ground. You are at 41 degree North latitude & 59 degree West longitude.

Lady: You must be an engineer.

Man: How do you know?

Lady: Everything you told me is technically correct but useless & the fact is I'm still lost.

Engineer: You must be in Top Management.

Lady: Ya. How do you know?

Engineer: You don't know where you are or where you're going, you have no technical knowledge.
You made a promise, which you've no idea how to keep & you expect people beneath you to solve your problems..!!
😀😀😀😀😀😀😀

classes

Old times.

An old conversation with a former Team Lead (TL)

TL: The client has requested for a feature. Can you provide an effort estimation.

(gives estimation with task breakdown)

TL: 2 weeks? They wants it in 3 days!

Me:

I forgot that I've installed the Cloud to Butt on Chrome

Command executed..