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I cannot spell for shit, so my coworker keeps commenting on my pull requests with spelling fixes...
Decided to buy this for him today...
12 -
Got semi drunk and thought "Now would be a good time to implement this feature"
*Codes for 2 hours straight without compiling once*
"Done. Good night"
The next morning:
Gets up and tries out feature
*Fixes 2 syntax errors/typos*
*Tries again*
*Feature works*7 -
*alright,let's go to bed now*
*finally in bed and about to sleep*
*figured bug out in head*
*gets out of bed, fixes the bug*
*gets back into bed*
.
.
.
*heeeey wait, if I do it like this.... *
*gets out to fix second bug*
*back to bed*
.
.
*Hoooold on... *fixes third bug while laying in bed**
*really has to go to bed now 😩*24 -
2 years ago: Connection goes down at the office
Boss: -"Damnit, you are responsible to ensure uptime. Fix a redundant connection asap."
Me: Fixes redundant connection
Today: Connection goes down at the office, failover connection does not work.
Me: Calls ISP and asks what's happened.
ISP: -"Your boss cancelled the account 3 months ago"
...15 -
Me - "Has anyone changed the password on the print computer"
Him - "It's the same one."
Me - "Carrots99?"
Him - "Yeah, what's the message that comes up?
Me - "Password is incorrect."
The dumbest conversation I've ever had in my fucking life. You little shit, I know you changed the password just to fuck with people. You've been reading too many books on elevating yourself, tried to be important for something. It means fuck all if you can't remember what you changed it to. So you held up two hours of my work, not to mention everyone else, because you can't help but stick your beak in shit. You dont think people can't see what youre doing? Watching you scurry over to the computer with a big smile, only a to fuck off silent as a mouse not to be seen mumbling some shit about a system administrator. Yeah you forgot it you prick.
Stop sucking up to the boss, and commanding people on what to do, when you're as junior as junior gets. Don't change our fucking passwords, just so you can have the whole team approach you the next day asking for you, then not remember them. You cunt.13 -
1 - Programmer produces code he believes is bug-free.
2 - Product is tested. 20 bugs are found.
3- Programmer fixes 10 of the bugs and explains to the testing department that the other 10 aren’t really bugs.
4 - Testing department finds that five of the fixes didn’t work and discovers 15 new bugs.
5 - Due to marketing pressure and an extremely premature product announcement based on overly-optimistic programming schedule, the product is released.
6 - Users find 137 new bugs.
7 - Newly-assembled programming team fixes almost all of the 137 bugs, but introduce 456 new ones.
8 - Entire testing department gets fired.
9 - Company is bought in a hostile takeover by competitor using profits from their latest release, which had 783 bugs.
10 - New CEO is brought in by board of directors. He raises the programming team's salary to redo the program from scratch.
11 - Programmer produces code he believes is bug-free.
12 - fml9 -
*trying to find bug*
Me: Hmm, let's do grocery shopping.
*getting ready, locking everything up*
*standing outside for three seconds*
*realizes what the bug must be*
*opens everything again and fixes bug*
*locks everything up for the second time*
*Goes grocery shopping*
So that just happened.5 -
Start coding for work this morning, immediately notice a ui bug, ugh. Want to get cracking with another bug I'm supposed to fix.
Fix the bug, and it incidentally fixes the other bug. Two in one.
*Suspicious*4 -
Marketing: it's not working...
Me: *fixes bug and pushes changes in less than 5 mins*
Me: Well it's working for me
Marketing: strange... it wasn't working 5 minutes ago...
I love their faces of confusion haha11 -
We should create
a `make` command
that auto-fixes building problems
by recursively trying solutions
found on stackoverflow.17 -
Fresh out of college?
Entry-level?
Apply Here!
Junior Web Intern: 16k A Year!
Basic Requirements: HTML, CSS, JavaScript, Node, Angular, JQuery, Bootstrap, Backbone, Handlebars, D3, p3, CMS (WordPress, Wixx), PHP, Java (Android), C++(iOS), openframeworks, openGLSL, Cinder, failed at least two startups, 8086 assembly language.
Recommended requirements:
Git version control
Agile development
Must be able to display example of each requirement.16 -
When so called developers "fixes" things by setting 777 on directories...
Please do not call yourself a dev26 -
Opened my laptop this morning to see that the touchpad wasn't working
Restarted my computer to see both my touchpad and wifi adapter not working.
Restarted again and then the wifi adapter wasn't working, but the touchpad was.
And now the wifi adapter magically fixes itself.
ಠ_ಠ9 -
Developers that write commit messages that literally say "Changes", "Fixes", etc. Please act like a professional and write proper messages ffs5
-
The code you write is your child.
When it misbehaves(bugs) you disciplines(fixes) it.
You are ecstatic when it achieve something(into production).
You want them to be at par with the world(adapting to new libraries).
So, to all the developers out there happy father's day.6 -
Me: Damn it guys, you broke the master branch again.
*Fixes master branch*
*15 minutes later*
Coworker: Bro, master branch is broken again.
Me: Oh for fuck's sake, who did it this time?
Coworker: You did.
Me: I have become the very thing I've swore to destroy.1 -
There should be a TV show where junior programmers make a software and then one famous senior programmer finds bugs, yell at them and fixes it. The name of the show will be "Coding nightmares".15
-
Today I got told to stop using a repo and work directly from the FTP server.
Today sucked. That is all12 -
So I found a bug in Bootstrap 4 today that was causing responsive tables to break. I looked at it for a while and threw a bunch of potential fixes at it, to no avail.
I was about to open a bug report when I stumbled upon the cause...
I spelled “table-responsive” wrong 🤦♂️5 -
Boss: Hey funny guy, It's your First Work anniversary. Congratulations and now share your thought on completing a year with us.
Me: Thanks Lady, All I wanted to say is Life was good and then I joined this project.
Boss: Told you, Funny guy. Now get back to work and I want those fixes by EOD.
Me: 😑4 -
Me visiting home for easter:
Me: tries to find some good assets for adventurejam
Me: fixes a bug on the prodserver
Me: redesigns a gui of an app
Me: applies for a bunch of new jobs
Mom: "you are always computer-ing, do something productive"3 -
🎶 On the sixth day of debugging my program gave to me ...
6 failed tests
5 help forums
4 broken dependencies
3 edge cases
2 moving specs
And 1 keyboard smashed in rage 🎶
This little carol is dedicated to the buggy-as-fuck nodejs project I was given for fixes and updates.
Happy holidays everyone6 -
So someone posted
"Hello! I need very minor work. Just some bug fixes and debugging"
So I read on and the first requirement is
"There is no admin panel. Make an admin panel for my website"
Like seriously WTF.7 -
Sometimes the best solution is the simplest
But sometimes it takes 20 hours of debugging to figure that out
😧1 -
Definitely feel thankful when apps do provide update with fixes but then some release note are like this... 🤔
4 -
When you don't have new feature to add to the app but need to keep updates.
"General bug fixes and performance improvements."3 -
April fools day prank idea:
1. Replace all semicolons with Greek question marks
2. Add a Gradle task that automatically fixes the semicolons, but only when run on the build servers
3. Watch as people get confused because the code builds in the server but not locally3 -
Congratulations? For fucking what. So you built a wix website. Now youre a web developer and the whole world knows it, my services aren't needed anymore.
Congratulations you bypassed half a decade in 50 hours a week of coding, then you have the bone and fucking marrow of emailing me because your like buttons are causing users to create a new instagran account. Good one kid.3 -
I get handed an API spec that has no naming convention followed for any of the JSON properties. Different for both GET and POST. I request fixes and get a "no budget" answer.
-
Me : I found this code issue, I think we need to fix it
PO: does it affect the user?
Me: not really but we can make it better
PO: do you have a defect for it in *insert issue tracker here*
Me: no, I just noticed it
PO: is there an IM ticket for it?
Me: I don't think so
PO: is this issue already in production?
Me: possibly. Yes. That's why I was wondering if we should fix it.
PO: okay then we will fix it in the 3rd release from now if you still remember it by then.5 -
Me - "I need to find the children"
CTO- "Okay. How many?"
It takes about 10 minutes to realize the conversation you just had1 -
Project Manager: "Let's put this temporary site up that the sales guys can use until the app is released in a few months"
A year later it's still used more than the app.
// bandaids are forever1 -
I know it's not trending anymore but talking about poor products - the Pokemon GO app! I mean, that shit is the Windows Vista of apps. Never before have I seen a product that crashes on the simplest gui tasks.
And after a month they finally roll an update which consists of.. "Minor text fixes"! $#%!2 -
I wonder how programmers make money. And found this answer
One creates Bugs and other fixes it.
Love this programming world 🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩2 -
Cnc v0.5 done.
Still needs a few fixes but I can engrave my DevRant Hello World.
Needs a bigger table (and Visor), new spindle (fried the one I bough, using a very old scarvanged for now)
You guys like?
25 -
Do you ever have those weeks where you have to fix a bug, then uncover another bug then another then another. Then you realise some functionality is completely missing. You write tests to cover your bug fixes and new functionality. Then you realise tests are broken with your fixes and you have no idea why. Then you get so frustrated you start making silly mistakes. Then your debugger starts playing up.... Yeah that's been my week.5
-
I'm soooo glad that the Google Drive team isn't one of those that always puts "But fixes and performance improvements." 😒
4 -
If coding was a thing 100+ years ago, we'd have quotes by great men like "You won't have space for new ideas unless you shit out the old ones in the toilet." which would be an alternative for "the toilet is the best place to think of algorithms and fixes."
-
Why do my colleagues insist on HOURLY messages like "any update on X?" or "did you fix Y yet?"
REST ASSURED, WHEN IT IS DONE AND READY TO BE DEMOED, I WILL MESSAGE YOU, AS I HAVE FOR ALL PAST FEATURES AND BUG FIXES.
sheesh talk about too much time on your hands...6 -
My job in a nutshell:
*fixes app, so it's working 99% bug free*
*Chrome update*
*app is full of bugs*
*fixes bugs*
*iOS 10 comes out*
*app is full of bugs*
*fixes bugs*
"we can now remove iOS7 support"
*removes code*
*app is full of bugs*
For fucks sake!!2 -
So a little story about finding your way. I worked at an IoT software firm, very well established. I had a hard time with the on boarding process due to some factors, and I must have lagged behind their mental schedule for my growth. It was clear nonetheless that I was a quality coder and had made some friends there.
It wasn’t enough for the ensuing corporate bullying. It went by and I took it. I became the yes man just so I don’t frustrate anyone enough to turn away my ask for help. This made things worse and before long, I a grown man went to visit my mum and all but cry at how small I felt, after all my hard work getting to the company.
I felt sick with failure but I knew I couldn’t go back. I emailed my resignation and dropped off my company laptop.
4 months later I am working at a medical startup with my own projects, that I have 100% control over. And the quality of my work and ethic is pleasing upper management in all the right ways. I’ve never been happier, and there are barely any perks on paper. No free lunches on Thursdays or discounts at the local high street. I’m the happiest I’ve ever been in my life because I said NO to feeling or being treated any less than I worked and progressed to be.
Don’t let other people stop your potential for their own ego, or any other reason. 😊 -
I started interning at a non IT Company, first thing I did was fix the printer 😂
I guess this is our destiny2 -
I just don't get my coworkers. They tweak designs, they tweak functionality, but no task is made.
They just simply update designs in Figma, without notifying anyone or just msg me on Slack what to change...
How the fuck do you guarantee that all those tweaks will get reflected to the app? How do you guarantee I won't forget? How do you guarantee QA will test your stupid tweaks?2 -
> barges in
> slams massive unintelligible PR on the table
> fixes a bunch of tickets all at once
> won't explain how tf it works, it just does
> refuses to elaborate further
> leaves
9 -
How I want my Git history to look like:
New Feature - Step 1
New Feature - Step 2
Adjustments
...
How my history looks instead:
Super massive Mega Feature
Fixes
Fixes
... -
If Android phone has a bug and doesn’t receive fix: nobody cares
If iPhone has a bug and Apple fixes it after 2 days: WOLOLOLOLO, APPLE SUCKS! THE END OF APPLE IS NEAR!11 -
Proud moment this week. Have been making my first contribution to Open Source software. And a huge project too. I hope it will long continue :)2
-
It's killing me.
This senior keeps doing all his fixes in the the same branch (named "develop-copy-{hisname}") and keeps merging it directly into develop and deployment branches. He has a lot of experience and therefore the manager gave him direct access to the branch.
The problem will arise when the QA team sends back one of the issues in the release back for changes. This never happened till date (his fixes are early and we vet all in-team changes, therefore he gets time to clean up his mess before the release date) but someday this will bite us in the ass.
I'm really unsure about ratting him out to the manager but I couldn't convince him to use separate branches (or separate commits) for different fixes. I couldn't convince him to add JIRA links/numbers into the commit messages either.
And, the junior devs I manage are getting inspired by him, and won't listen to me when I try to enforce separate branches, creating a political mess (probably I'm kinda like a contractor and they are permanent employees).
Sucks.6 -
After two weeks with Ubuntu - I'm done with this. I'm going back to Windows.
Why? Well, it fixes some Windows problems, but at the same time new ones are popping and they are even bloody worse.10 -
Google: The all mighty bug fixes for Android Studio are now live, see version 3.4
Android Studio: But I still freeze when I need to format xml files tho, but who cares...
** Days later
Google: Android Studio 3.4.1 is now live! Smash those bugs!
Android Studio: lool I still freeze when formatting an xml file ¯\_(ツ)_/¯1 -
Yesterday my docker build started failing for my .NET core project, but it worked on Windows!
Today I found a Github issue, 4 hours old, what fixes it? Downgrading my kernel, which I upgraded a few days ago to v5
I would never have discovered that on my own, what the hell1 -
When you snap at the other Developer because you SWEAR your bug fix push corrected the issue, to then be put back in your place...realizing the other Developer was right...humble yourself4
-
When an application has tons of security holes and fixes never make it into sprint prioritization because "they're not new features"4
-
git commit -m 'some fixes. FTR I hate Torvalds and I am NEVER using any piece of software built by him!'
// inspired by someone's rants a while ago2 -
Just been hired as a mid level developer for an IoT company. With considerable benefits and pay increase!
YES!! -
That moment when rerunning the code fixes the error that the IDE has been throwing, after not finding what could be the issue for said error.
-
CI came up with 265 errors. (deploying to an old server to bring it back).
I make some very clever fixes and run it again.
Now we have 269 errors.
-_-2 -
Imagine if libraries and framework you were using started making chabgelogs like the one they make in the mobiles apps.
*We've made some new features and some buh fixes 💫*3 -
If you don't know, there are 2 types of bug fixes:
Hot Fix - Patch files directly on the production
Quick Fix - Deploy fix on production and then test it4 -
When I write “grid-template-columns: repeat(auto-fill, minmax(max(15rem, (100% - (var(--columns) - 1) * 1rem) / var(--columns)), 1fr));” in my coworker’s code and it fixes the CSS grid
7 -
I threw an error into my code to find where the code was having trouble but instead of raising and error it fixes the problem and runs flawlessly
At this point I can't tell if python loves me or hates me2 -
That feeling when a backend dev (me) fixes frontend at night!
Feeling so happy this footer stays down there!!!!!!
3 -
CEO announced a bug bounty programme for devs to do stuff in their free time for additional cash.
Cash is decided by business people based on their idea of how complex the given problem is.
And it's not for bugs one could just find and fix. Only some fixes/features decided by them.
Like second shift.4 -
Why do I feel like developers at Zoom don't have a life: They release a list of over hundreds of new updates and bug fixes almost everyday. As much as I give them credits I also still feel sorry for them.
4 -
When your company lays off an architect responsible for building a dozen very important components, and then everyone is left in a panic trying to figure out how to fulfill support requests / bug fixes in a timely manner 😑1
-
+++ Microsoft Genuine Snake Oil: The purest snake oil on the market now contains even less remote code execution vulnerabilities! +++
https://zdnet.com/article/... -
I got my first gig as an android developer a couple of months back.
Today, my changes got merged into candidate, soon to be released.
Although they are mostly bug fixes, I feel proud that code written by me will be rolled out to 400000 users. :')3 -
Just finished writing some code.
Got one error.
"Alright" I said, "almost done!"
*fixes the error*
"2589 errors"
I guess someone up there really hates me...1 -
PM: can we fix listed changes today?
Me: hmm, let me check the list out.
PM: because I told the client it would be ready tomorrow morning.
The end. -
When a project manager has 'fixes' written on paper and wants to sit with you while you make them.1
-
Yeah these fucking assholes lost a 300 pound gaming chair at my local depot for 3 weeks where I eventually got a refund from Amazon. I ordered a USB desk fan for the heat off ebay, yeah these fucking cunts delivered it to my workplace at 9pm.
Guess who is building my companies new ecommerce platform, where I am currently integrating the shipping options. Fuck off Yodel.7 -
It's been so long without an update on my little encryption project so...
We accomplished the following:
- big fixes and bug fixes
- drag and drop in files and folders
- screwed over many times
... And finally ...
- THEME SUPPORT!! WUHUUU
(Look attached screenshot)
Currently I just implemented two themes but a theme explorer will follow.
I'll create 3 themes for this project, normal, dark and Alice themed.
Stay tuned ✌️
5 -
My latest attempt to improve myself as a dev has been learning front end technologies, or as I prefer to call it, throwing heaps of shit at a wall and seeing what sticks and calling it modern design. Fuckers.
Otherwise I usually try to implement small manageable side projects to learn new tools enough to know what they are good for so if I ever do need them I know what to choose.1 -
That feeling when you have found an impossible to find bug after digging in and you attempt a fix as soon as you find it and the first 1 fixes everything
-
Bug-report:
Fastly pressing 2 different items in the bottombar results into a disabled content.
Pressing an item again fixes it, but still...
Correction: Pressing a different item and then the previous item causes it
13 -
When someone asks you to test something before pushing a release...releases anyway and tells you any fixes can just go in the next minor release 😫4
-
If your “solution” fixes the test case which is failing, it does NOT guarantee that it is the correct fix. You don’t just blindly change whatever piece of code you like to make just the test case pass. You actually also need to analyse the code and ensure that the rest of the intended functionality is still intact.3
-
Accidentally mistyped Bug Fixes as Big Fixes and people think there was something very wrong with the application all this while.1
-
Ever have a bug that *only* occurs in your production environment? How do you test potential fixes? 😜5
-
I propose the brand new, AI-powered debugger.
When your program returns an error, like this one:
“x is undefined”,
…you convert it to SpongeBob case and add a clown emoji, like this:
“x iS uNdEfInEd 🤡”
and the program fixes itself and apologizes.1 -
My boss is never gonna fucking understand scrum...
Even though I have explained him countless times he still creates user stories named "fixes" and puts all tasks in it...
Dude, are you having a seizure? -
Today I spilt a glass of water onto my palm. As I was shaking the hand of a senior executive. He looked at me in disgust as our hands squelched together.
-
It's a real nice feeling when you figure out the answer to your own stackoverflow question as you're typing it out.
Not gonna make myself look like an idiot this time! No-sir-ee.4 -
Stupid pipeline bullshit.
Yeah i get it, it speeds up development/deployment time, but debugging this shit with secret variables/generated config and only viewable inside kubernetes after everything has been entered into the helm charts through Key Vaults in the pipeline just to see the docker image fail with "no such file found" or similar errors...
This means, a new commit, a new commit message, waiting for the docker build and push to finish, waiting for the release pipeline to trigger, a new helm chart release, waiting for kubernetes deployment and taking a look at the logs...
And another error which shouldn't happen.
Docker, fixes "it runs on my machine"
Kubernetes, fixes "it runs on my docker image"
Helm, fixes "it runs in my kubernetes cluster"
Why is this stuff always so unnecessarily hard to debug?!
I sure hope the devs appreciate my struggle with this... well guess what, they won't.
Anyways, weekend is near and my last day in this company is only four months away.2 -
Omfg... Fixed 3 LifeRay 6.1.1 ce security bugs in less than a day. I should be proud, but I am actualy fucking worried I've been with this project for too long if I can already make liferay fixes THAT fast...
Am I becoming a legacy...? Shit5 -
Ok I'm officially losing my fucking mind!
I've been trying to solve a connection bug that only occurs in production which is cool if THIS FUCKING APP DIDN'T TAKE 30 MINUTES TO DEPLOY!!!
Been busy for 4 hours and I've only been able to test 4 minor fixes. -
Constraint Layout is the best thing Google has ever made for responsive Android design, when it works.
Half the time it suddenly stops finding any elements I want to attach my selected one to, so it can't constrain what I want it to constrain.
A restart fixes it though...1 -
Ah demonstration day. The day when everything that does not need to break, will break. The day when you give birth to the nastiest "temporary" quick fixes. I need a smoke and a coffee, gonna be a long day.1
-
Me: "Oh right I still had to fix that"
Me: *fixes thing*
Me: *checks on staging to make sure it all works*
Thing: *works absolutely fine*
Me: "Cool, let's promote it"
Me: *updates production stack*
Me: *checks on production to make sure it works*
Thing: *still broken*
dsfhjh dsaghdsaupot nvhudfot vnhgue6 -
Push a PR that fixes 7 bugs...
Feel like a pro :)
Trying to get the 2 required approvals for my PR on a Friday after lunch...
Feels like pulling teeth :( -
I have a dream that someone will write completely free linux driver for AMD videocards
and for Nvidia too
and fixes OpenGL7 -
Temporarily in an apartment while my landlord fixes a potentially disastrous foundation problem and my flooding room. Having my battle station on a folding table finally paid off, super portable. My laptop is on a union break here
3 -
Dear Colleagues. Stop saying iOS (i-oohs). It's (i-oh-es). You don't call it fucking windows ooohs. You sound like fucking idiots to our clients1
-
When updating + restarting your Windows PC fixes the random exception being thrown in your controller when you were worried your frontend code broke the site. 😲
-
Till now, my best project is a DOS based ping pong game programmed in C++
It was like 3 hrs of main game followed by many bug fixes and features.
https://youtu.be/2S0F8ZIN3SY have a look at the video.1 -
principle software developer who does not code, design, or architect,
instead, do random eslint fixes which create conflict with everyone's branches.
1 line of code "fix" per commit.
there goes 26 commits1 -
Dev Goal : Fix the bugs you said you will solve in 2015, but are still open,
Because you know what fix to do,
And you are too lazy to do it.
And too busy, creating half baked, hacky fixes for new exciting problems.
:D -
Say “bug fixes and performance improvements” one more time! I dare you! I double dare you, motherfucker! Say “bug fixes and performance improvements” one more time!2
-
Sometimes I commit fixes for issues on my crypto exchange api repos without testing them and tell the issue author to test it themselves because "I don't have api keys for the respective api" to test it.
I'm fully registered on every exchange from here to Japan. 🙄 -
After a few days of debugging why sessions where getting lost in some versions of IE11 when all the other browsers where working just fine.
I found the solution in giving IE a potato.
Solution:
header ('P3P: CP='Potato')1 -
I have a demo meeting tmr but the web app written by the junior dev is in crap state. Forget about new features and bug fixes, I probably won't even be able to correct and clear all the spaghetti codes. So instead of working on it, I am trying to encourage myself by creating quotes images.
-
Our Other it team asked me to create a new repository instead of a new branch in my project just cuz they thought branching would be more time consuming than maintaining a separate repo for emergency bug fixes.
-
It booted, after months of working on a god damn simulation with various BIOSs revisions and fixes, with millions of kernel builds and a million of fixes of recipes. It booted from a first try. I almost fainted :D3
-
when the client sends you a long and very detailled/structured .xlsx to explain fixes... and it turns out it's just a typo in the footer.
-
when a dev fixes a memory leek issue but rebooting the server, and when ask why the production application crashes he casualty replies "I don't know but I restarted the server and its fine now..."7
-
How to impress PM:
1. Prepare a critical bug, that makes the frontend crash
2. Prepare a hotfix, that fixes the bug
3. Deploy bug on Friday afternoon
4. Wait until PM starts panicking
5. Deploy hotfix after 5 min
6. Get praise from PM5 -
My colleagues: "We should fail for scalastyle issues! Warnings will get ignored! Nobody fixes them! We should enforce a clean code style!"
Also my colleagues: Create PR with loads of `// scalastyle:off` flags comments.
¯\_(ツ)_/¯1 -
No offense to anyone who uses it, but I can't stand ASP.net web forms. It just feels so wrong. Then to add the unexplainable behaviour that fixes it's self after creating a new file and pasting in the previous contents without changes.
Asdfdhfjjdsha
Sorry needed that off my chest :) -
And finally my favorite OS on my favorite laptop.
Had trouble in the past with wifi and straight up not booting.
But Loki fixes everything, except the screenshot button but ok fine. I can at least use linux normally. Till now I was using bash on windows and tbh it was good.
1 -
/**
* @fixme Properly escape this input, but for now str_replace(); will do.
*/
Ah, the good permanent temporary solutions.
fyi. The file in question has been untouched for 3-4 years. -
Being the sole contributor to a project is such an experience. After endless nights of bug fixes and brainstorming, I have breleased my app to play store.
Currently it is Alpha phase . I'm getting some positive feedback as well as some great comments from my friends . Really looking forward to release the project in production soon15 -
A new update was just released to AltRant!
This update features:
- Massive UI responsiveness fixes and enhancements, including many fixes for UI bugs, fixes and things that needed tweaking
- A COMPLETE overhaul of all devRant API methods (a switch to my new library, SwiftRant)
- Progress with Android compatibility (replaced incompatible libraries for compliance with Mutata)
- Enhanced security with the Keychain
Here’s the link to join again:
https://testflight.apple.com/join/...7 -
Hate those bugs, where you stumble upon a fix but have no idea why it fixes it or what is causing the bug!2
-
I have made a lot of small changes in my app like minor bug fixes, Animation, optimizations, better database management, new options, overall interface improvements, ... to give the application a better overall appearance. Then I decide to show it to my Client.
"From what I can tell, you haven't done much since last time"1 -
My family thinks me as
- the guy who fixes computers
- the guy who fixed mobile devices
- the guy who knows (must know) about mobile phones (which I personally can care less)1 -
Management fixes our slow running buggy code problem by exactly copying every file into separate version control depots so that Dept A does have to deal with Dept B bugs and Dept B does have to deal with Dept A bugs to the same files.1
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One of my commits today:
“Corrected a file path for view as it’s causing issues within the live environment”
What I actually wanted to put:
“Changed letter to uppercase in file path for view because live is being a fucking bitch about it”
Why do my Dev and Live environments have to differ 😞, I kept my cool though, which is a first for me 🙂4 -
Gotta stop providing better code solutions to crap that's not my business, roped into so much crap and now I have to put all these bad code fixes into some intern training scenarios or something...fml
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@dfox. Please make links to devRant open in the app.
For example: https://www.devrant.io/rants/243831
^opens in web browser7 -
Some days I feel like I’m a very slow developer. Spend a lot of time doing small fixes and building features that in my mind should be fast. Don’t know if I just have unreal expectations or not3
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Wow I'm first!! Uhm... 8... I forgot to take lunch break cuz I was really busy or the code was really interesting...
If within 24 hrs... Maybe 12... I had to login at night a few times to finish urgent work (bug fixes) -
Not dev related but got offered to work at the Champions league final.
The tickets sold out within ten minutes and there's me making money!3 -
The best coworker I've had always wanted to fix everything! And most times he did. But sometimes his fixes created more bugs. Needless to say his name is Paul Ness so it made it even better hearing people say "PNesswhat did you do now!?" , that never got old. 😂
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!rant
Adding those final touches (basically last minute bug fixes) before releasing my app to the store. Aiming for the weekend if everything goes as expected...
Right now, adding analytics...
Sooooo close now 😁👍1 -
So we pushed some quick fixes management required to the system before going home to sleep. We warned them that we don’t have much time to check and test them. Because ordinarily such fixes go fine, they insisted.
What do you know, while we slept some smartasses within users drained our system money through the new hole we did not notice.
Manager responsible for this just gone dark, never ever picked up his phone. Just disappeared.
We don’t do such fixes anymore 🤗2 -
I'm in love with Webpack but jeeeeeesus when it breaks in obscure ways maaaaan
Like, I got it working earlier, no errors, everything looks great... aaaaand website is blank. No page, no source, not even anything in the console, just blank. Over an hour later... turns out removing the output target fixes it. Why? No idea. Nothing.2 -
3 hours debugging for one colon. Welcome to the shadow bugs in Go. This was one of the most satisfying fixes. And a great introduction about shadowbugs.
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Android Java came a long way since I've stopped programming for it 5 years ago. Now you've got nice dependency injection, storage helpers and good hybrid solutions. So, curious as I am, I asked to work on some bug fixes in the Android application at work. Bad choice.
"Welcome back!" said the nullpointers, "We've missed you!"2 -
Anybody else got this weird little glitch?
Steps to reproduce:
1. Scroll down until the header darkens
2. Hover over any of the header options
3. Scroll up until the header becomes transparent but not fully
Notes:
- Can't use a screenshotting tool, the refresh fixes the glitch
- Can't select the element in devtools, glitch disappears
8 -
Weblogic Server won't start, broken build was auto-deployed. How does a broken build even get deployed? 🙄
Told "till the server is fixed work on your next-release bugs". Sure, can investigate, maybe even code fixes, but with a broken dev environment how do we test anything?
" Hmm..Oh yeah, right" 🤔 -
Oh you have a pull request that fixes a bug impacting customers atm? This is a perfect opportunity to write a novel that debates optimal coding practices in the review
Smiling eye twitch2 -
> Finally write some wicked code that fixes a weird race condition bug we’ve had for two weeks now
> xCode breaks for absolutely no reason on a build so we can’t release a new version
🤦♀️1 -
I have some really satisfying bug fixes in one particular project but it's under NDA.
So I'm not allowed to tell you guys any of them :(1 -
I'm working on a very-customized web player at work.
I filled my code with a plenty of comments, many to justify those functions / fixes.
For those comments, Safari is depicted as worse than Edge.
Is it even possible?
The next dev, which will take my code in his hands, must know how much we suffered to build it.4 -
When my Firefox window is too narrow devRant completely shits all over itself and glitches so hard that rants cannot be scrolled anymore unless I make the window larger and go apeshit on the scrollbar until it fixes itself again.
I thought my mouse broke.2 -
Has anyone else installed Ubuntu 18.04 and have their themes not working (I'm using arc thenes), and the top bar menu options like file, edit, etc not appearing? I can't find fixes.
AND WHY IS 18.04 SLOWER WITH GNOME?!
This better all be fixed by the final release. Also by slower, I mean animations, opening certain apps, like wth.6 -
Screw you Chrome and your security fixes. You wasted 3 hours of my life.
Hate cross-origin and the fact that requests to http://cdn.example.com from http://example.com are considered cross-origin.
https://developers.google.com/web/...1 -
Quick Java question.
Does spending £200 on Oracle certification raise your job market value?
Or is it just a pointless money maker for Oracle.3 -
The best part about working on Someone else's UI bug fixes is that you get to look like a hero when you fix the bugs and make all their work look like a sham - asshole 101
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!rant
The joys of returning from my annual leave..
My contributions after just being back from a 7-day leave.. 27 in total.. PR's, issues, bug fixes, feature fixes, requested features,..
Feels good tho.. It was a productive day today and we made the weekly update! :D
( Yes, I pushed commits while on vacation :D )
2 -
DRC Hide & Seek
Me: runs DRC on finished layout
KiCAD: Unconnected nets found.
Me: fixes unconnected and runs DRC again
KiCAD: Different unconnected nets found
Me: fixes unconnected and runs DRC again
KiCAD: Differen unconnected nets found
Me: srsly?! Why can't you tell me all of them at once?2 -
(defn rant []
(go
(let [feature-pool (atom [:ui-fixes])]
(loop []
(<! wait-for-release-week)
(->>
shit-load-of-features
(reset! feature-pool)
develop-features
ask-for-feature-status
deploy-in-last-minute
find-a-bug-and-rollback release
(recur))))
(rant)13 -
The bipolar nature of leading a startup tech team:
It's either no one needs you, or the problem is big enough to have you push 5 fundamental fixes from abyss to upstream.2 -
"Oh just promote the fixes already! Don't worry, it won't break other stuff."
Not the worst advice maybe but certainly something that got me doing a lot of rework. I freakin' hate rework.2 -
me: *opens dev env using Docker*
me: *makes changes*
project: *permission error*
me: *fixes permissions*
Git: *Can't find a compatible repo*
asdf -
Alright! So this is my issue. It’s supposed to do this but it does that. Alright, see. Firstly I do this, then that. Afterwards I have this loop though ... ohhhh now I get it.
*fixes three lines of code*
Thanks! -
A lazy sunday night with Monday coming up next day. This week will be busy with all those client requests and defect fixes.
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Q) What's the bravest action ever?
a) Sky diving
b) Rock climbing
c) Underwater diving
d) Doing fixes in Production
Correct Answer: Option (d)2 -
How is it that an error fixes itself and a new error pops up where there should be no error?
Just when I thought I was getting the hang of it..
🤔 -
I hate this type of Developer who always asks to add everything as requirement for every single detail. Company is paying you for thinking, or at least asking BA, not only coding requirements in Java/C#/whatever and denying fixes because it was not in requirements.3
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everytime i turn on my computer to complete my freelancing job i end up playing games.
any fixes? :/12 -
App Update changelog: "Bug fixes and performance improvements."
What the update is actually about: "Well. We've added some cool intrusive Ads that will screw up your entire app experience. But we don't care."2 -
Freeze time with the computer I am sat on.
So when somebody says something can be done in an hour, they're usually correct -
<rant>
FFS
Windows is the worst garbage ever...
First I get a virus becouse the antivirus didn't fucking work, then I try and do a system reset WICH FAILS, them u have to get into the uefi and do a system reset back to Windows 8, Windows 8..
So I go to the windows insider program and download the media creator thing and
.
.
IT DOESN'T WORK
It just stops at "searching for updates"and now I'm stuck with Windows 8
I can't even get the Nvidia drivers so i can't play games anymore
A big fuck you to Microsoft and merry Christmas
Btw any fixes? Thank you
</rant>9 -
You can be very good at writing algorithms and good quality code, but if your architecture is garbage, you'll be doing hacky fixes and end up with a spaghetti code.3
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So in my current job and the current projects that I was a founding member of, there have been a bunch things that have been done that has made the management of projects a complete nightmare. An example would be the vendor directory being submitted into the repository. This was not my decision as I was against it at the time.
So for the past 3 years I've been bitching about fixing it and have always been denied because they wanted me to work on other things. But with me leaving at the end of the month, they suddenly want me to fix everything. Guess they want to get every drop of work out of me as once I'm gone, there'll be no one left who understands the core of all the applications. -
How can I contribute coding or any fixes or issues of Devrant .. want to be part of Devrant devs😎😎😎2
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GitHub defaults to only allow squash merging feature branches, and suggests that it is "safe" to delete the feature branch that contains all the detailed commit messages at the place where they belong. Losing history, plus creating unnecessary "conflicts" after continuing to work and adding fixes to the same feature branches later.3
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the place my friends and I were previously interning at offered to pay us for some freelance work once we started school, "it'll only take one month, the backend is ready!", they said.
We finished on time, and delivered fixes throughout UAT. 9 months and counting only paid half the promised amount.... -
The wonderful feeling when project was finally relesed and deployed, you have no chance for any more last minute fixes and you can finally merge into master and break everything :-)
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Today we finally launched Keycloak to secure our spring cloud microservice architecture!
Great feeling after 4 month of tailoring open source software, bug fixes and so much pain 😄 -
Really hate it when a project is switching focus every month or so. You start focusing and committing a lot of time to make things work. Taking initiative to enhance things. Then some weeks later management is switching focus and you have to port all fixes in the new code base. Then some weeks later you have to work on the things you did before but with some adjustments that result in the old code not being possible to use and you have to port fixes again. When complaining you sometimes get the question "how hard can it be, it's just some code". Some motivation is lost every time. And repeat this like a "while true" loop.
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Goverment just confirmed 2nd January as National holiday (work free day)...scheduled Nationwide production on 1st January, 2nd January for bug fixes (no holiday for me)
FML! -
"Bug fixes and performance improvements" - what I actually mean is that I shipped some dodgy code & this patch covers my humongous arse...sort of.1
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Out of NOwhere, VSCode moves the cursor instead of scrolling horizontally when I use the two-fingers sideways gesture on the touchpad.
Very angry, very sad, I hope it fixes itself just as spontaneously as it happened.5 -
Please install PostCSS 8 or above
postcss --version
8.3.1
googling and trying incompatibility fixes instead of actually building a seemingly simple react app with tailwind css -
How is this for competence...
To push new features or fixes on one of our clients production sites that runs on AWS with auto scaling instances, we have to manually change the files in each instance that is running by ftp, and the template in S3. -
Finally release the next version of my own asocial (*) medium, wegurus, which will feature SEO friendly urls, responsive layout, and a lot of minor and major fixes under the bonnett.
(* Asocial because it's basically just me and my mum using it atm ;))1 -
Hey Postman,
Please fucking stop downloading minor updates and bug fixes automatically. Even if you do it, give the users an option to cancel the fucking download so that they can, you know, peacefully use the app for what it was built for.7 -
Occasionally I'll make a commit with a message such as 'a' or 'nope' or 'fix' when a few fixes haven't worked when pushing to the test build... I always look back and hate it...
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Using nano on the server for quick fixes because I'm too lazy to setup the project. And using 'git checkout -- [filename]' when shit goes wrong.
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Used XSLT for the first time at work. It seems like it can be a pretty powerful tool in the right situation, but I'm not too happy that I have to use it in the first place.2
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Damn.. I'm filling in a web form on my mobile, and when I got to 'phone' field I tried to submit this3
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So many occasions to choose from! Probably the most pissed I've been is when I'd been assigned to work on (and completed fixes for) the same bug as another developer twice in the same week after already having spent 4 days working on a new enhancement that's requirements changed literally an hour after I'd saved the code!
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Work load, bug fixes, plenty of errors, back and neck pain and eye strain does not irritate me as much as HRs not responding to your emails.
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My code works....
...turns on MySQL strict
...my code doesn’t work
...fixes
...turns on Notice errors...
...My code doesn’t work :-/ -
Version 1 of any software is full of bugs. Version 2 fixes all the bugs and is great. Version 3 adds all the things users ask for, but hides all the great stuff in Version 2.
;) -
In those learning days the universal solution to all systems issues -
'restart and see if that fixes' -
Hello all, recently I have been doing alot of front end work in web forms and lead generation. I would love to learn more about marketing and how it can be applied as a dev.
Does anyone recommend any good books atall?
Thanks!2 -
What is the the best job title if you work in a company and does everything related to Software Development. Planning, documentation, architecture, network, full stack coding, testing, bug fixes etc. Full stack engineer? Or... ?7
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!Rant
Add the function below to your .bashrc
function doGit() {
git add .
git commit -a -m ".."
git push
}
Next time just use doGit "bug fixes" ☺
What will you name your function?? -
Wow. Setting ReSharper -> Options -> Code Inspection -> Value analysis mode to Disable nullability analysis fixes pretty much all of the ReSharper typing lag for me.
Wish I had known this years ago. I love ReSharper, but the typing lag was always annoying. -
@dfox you may have a layering problem. I can see the "algo - new - ..." under the posts when i first start the app. I'm on a galaxy s4 mini. Hiding/Showing the bar fixes it.
2 -
Okay, I will just send a fix version this week... Umm 2 crashes and a small UX improvement, should take 10 minutes...
Android Studio says something needs updating, well okay I have time...
*Codes the fixes*
*Tests the fixes*
WTF the backup functionality is broken.
*Debugs*
Silly Google drive lib, why don't you like when the user selects an account?
*Fires up another computer, doesn't let it update, compiles and it works!*
Fuck you google -
The community has multiple fixes to 3.0, but it looks like the whole team has been allocated elsewhere in Apollo, this is not the first time.
Good job, Peggy. Keep poaching for community hype and let us down, it will backfire.2
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