🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔

Two unit tests, no integration tests.

The aCalendar app let's you choose vibration pattern, it's one of the better settings I've seen.

One of our clients deploy their own server app. So this happened after a prod deployment. (4am)

*Cellphone rings while sleeping*

Client : we need you on the conference call now. URGENT!

*Gets on conference call*
*Client explain the problem*
*Explaining to the client that the problem is in their side (https connection not working, either network or certificate problem)*
*Client doesn't believe it and pushes me for a fix that I have no control on*
*4 hours later in a heated conversation*

Client : ok problem is on our side. We used our SSL certificate from staging with production and thought it would work.

Me :

You vs the guy she tells you not to worry about

Undefusable Unix Bomb

Life of an IT guy

1.Born
2.Study
3.Job
4.Shall I share my screen?.
5.Are you able to see my screen?
6.Am I audible ?
7.Correct me if I'm wrong
8.Sorry I was on mute
9.Ok.. I am sending that email.
10.Did you receive my email?
11.I am on a sick leave.
12.Death

Pretty much it!

This should be the cable management standard it would take so long but keep it tidy.

Excuse me boss!

During increment time
Boss : There are 50 bricks on an Plane. If u drop 1 outside. How many
are left?

Employee : That's easy, 49.

Boss : What are the three steps to put an elephant into a fridge?

Employee : Open the fridge. Put the elephant in. Close the fridge

Boss : What are the four steps to put a deer into the fridge?

Employee : Open the fridge. Take the elephant out. Put the deer in. Close the fridge.

Boss : It's lion's birthday, all animals are there except one, why?

Employee : Because the deer is in the fridge.

Boss : How does an old woman cross a swamp filled with crocodiles?

Employee : She crosses it because the crocodiles are at the lion's birthday

Boss : Last question. In the end the old lady still died. Why?

Employee : Er....I guess she drowned....err...

Boss : No! She was hit by the brick fallen from the Plane that's the problem, you are not focused on your job....You may leave now!!!

Moral: If your boss has decided to screw u, no matter How much u prepare u will be screwed.

Slow Internet connection and people who don't follow the Headphones Rules

Still deciding where to stick these bad boys. Thanks David&Tim, keep up the good work!

This is what our university recommends as reading material for databases. I'm still in denial that this exists.

How I think my code is running in production.

Data Structures...

HTTP response code cheat sheet
(From /r/Programmer humor)

Need a dark theme for eclipse?

WinKey +
Ctrl Alt i

Thank me later

Use profanity labelled variables... like the $penis I just used in my code... (makes coding fun, until u get "undefined variable: cannot find $penis on line 31")

Omg....😦

Finally got my hands on this awesome and beautiful game <3

My algorithm for errors

I deem myself well versed in this subject

Developer grandma

I need to to be exorcised

I heard you guys like stress balls

How a web application works

Found this in my office door this morning...

Found this on the Github trending list

"I'm just trying to replicate {ticket-1234} so I can write a quick hotfix."

- "Oh, it doesn't work on dev."

- "So... I have to test on stage?"

- "It doesn't work on stage either."

- "Uh, on prod?"

*office laughs*

We're doing it live folks.

Source /r/ProgrammerHumor

But they did not know