Details
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AboutProbably making a bot or some shiet
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SkillsPython, JS, C#
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LocationSweden
Joined devRant on 8/9/2017
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I did an assessment for a company and passed the tests. A Microsoft teams interview with the lead developer and 2 other developers is in 2 hours! Fingers crossed boys!!!! I hope I get my first developer job!!!4
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I wasn’t even looking for a job, I just went out for drinks with friends and I met this random dude. I complained to him about work wanting us to go back to the office, to which he replied that I should go work for them because they’re remote and looking for people. I had a look at their openings and they had a role with fewer responsibilities and a lot more money, so I applied. It’s been 3 months and I’m so glad I switched.11
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One of our internal apis returns an array in which the first element is metadata about the request.
Why would anyone want to punish their users like that6 -
I guess some one saw the future at 1923
But didn't took the mute functionality into consideration🧐5 -
My code review nightmare?
All of the reviews that consisted of a group of devs+managers in a conference room and a big screen micro-analyzing every line of code.
"Why did you call the variable that? Wouldn't be be more efficient to use XYZ components? You should switch everything to use ServiceBus."
and/or using the 18+ page coding standard document as a weapon.
PHB:"On page 5, paragraph 9, sub-section A-123, the standards dictate to select all the necessary data from the database. Your query is only selecting 5 fields from the 15 field field table. You might need to access more data in the future and this approach reduces the amount of code change."
Me: "Um, if the data requirements change, wouldn't we have change code anyway?"
PHB: "Application requirements are determined by our users, not you. That's why we have standards."
Me: "Um, that's not what I ..."
PHB: "Next file, oh boy, this one is a mess. On page 9, paragraph 2, sub-section Z-987, the standards dictate to only select the absolute minimum amount of the data from the database. Your query is selecting 3 fields, but the application is only using 2."
Me: "Yes, the application not using the field right now, but the user stated they might need the data for additional review."
PHB: "Did they fill out the proper change request form?"
Me: "No, they ...wait...Aren't the standards on page 9 contradictory to the standards on page 5?"
PHB: "NO! You'll never break your cowboy-coding mindset if you continue to violate standards. You see, standards are our promise to customers to ensure quality. You don't want to break our promises...do you?"7 -
Multi-factor authentication does not mean I have a password to your site AND have to login with Google. Also, I logged in with Google, you should have my email address now.
Oh, a user with that address already exists? No shit, it's me.
Your fucking login flow is broken.5 -
Bruh this memes relates to me so much cause I do a lot of open source and I need to debug and rewrite codes so many times and finally for the love of god, it runs1
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I got accepted for a Master's Degree Program in Software Engineering!
I'm super excited about this.
Course start next week! I'm freaking out a little, but I know this will lead to more exciting things in my life.11 -
What the actual fuck is a "Happiness Engineer"? A client asked me to add a line of code on wp-config.php (WordPress) so that Jetpack will work:
define("OPTION", "setting for this option");
I added it at the top just after <?php. Somehow, the service isn't working so I asked the client to get in touch with Jetpack. Jetpack Happiness Engineer replies back that the location of the code is wrong and should be above:
/* That's all, stop editing! Happy publishing. */
and informed the client that Jetpack is working flawlessly.
I put back the line where I originally placed it and Jetpack is still working. Motherfu3 -
I had a developer connect to my machine remotely to fix a flutter issue opened in vscode. I had given him full access on anydesk but complains he could not type anything. He kept reconnecting and me giving full access. After about 30 minutes I realized I had a vim extension on it. I couldn't bring myself to tell him. I just asked him to reconnect one more time while I disable the plugin and restart vscode.
Oopsie1 -
I previously ranted about oauth being unapproachable and incomprehensible. Well, here’s the diagram that allowed me to finally understand it.9
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Tldr: got trolled really hard in a meeting yesterday
So currently, our website has some control elements which are ambiguous to texts posted by users. So I was tasked wi... [read more]5 -
YELLED AT FOR 45 FUCKING MINUTES OVER OTHER PEOPLE’S FUCKUPS
IF YOU PIECES OF SHIT WANT ME TO DO SOMETHING, FUCKING SAY IT. WRITE IT THE FUCK DOWN IN THE FUCKING TICKET.
AND IF YOU WANT A FUCKING DEMO, SCHEDULE THE FUCKING THING, AND STOP FUCKING CANCELING THEM. DON’T BLAME ME WHEN IT’S YOUR FUCKING FINGER ON THE FUCKING CANCEL BUTTON EVERY. FUCKING. WEEK.
AND SERIOUSLY, DON’T FUCKING EXPECT ME TO DROP MY LAST FUCKING TICKET THE AFTERNOON BEFORE VACATION FOR SOME LOW-PRIOIRTY CRAP BECAUSE SUDDENLY IT’S ALL THE RAGE INSIDE YOUR TINY DUMBASS HEAD. BUT OH BOO FUCKING HOO, @ROOT DIDN’T DO WHAT I ASKED WHEN I WAS BEING A FUCKING MORON! GO FUCK YOURSELF YOU FUCKING STUCK-UP IDIOT
AND FUCK BOZO THE CLOWN BOSS FOR BLAMING ME FOR THE FUCKING IDIOT’S BRUISED FUCKING EGO
FUCK THE LOT OF YOU39 -
Perfect my script to automate YouTube videos to tiktok. The script would take a YouTube url as input and then split the video into 3 minute long pieces ( the longest time allowed for tiktok ) and post it to tiktok. I’ve gotten it before but I had to do some fucked shit bc I couldn’t get puppeteer to bypass tiktok’s bot security so it’s super inconsistent1
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1. I join a company.
2. I get deeply involved in "how to run the company", and get nice compliments from both coworkers & management about my skills in conveying startup/scaleup advice & necessities to upper management.
3. With my ego inflated through all the sweet talk, I think "ah, what the hell, let's do this again", and I accept a Lead/CTO promotion. I have to join board meetings, write reports on quarterly plans and progress.
4. I get unhappy/stressed/burned-out because I really just want to be a developer, not a manager/executive.
5. Upper management understands, I give up my lead position, lock myself back into my coding cave.
6. I get annoyed because the requirements I receive become more and more disconnected from reality, half of the teams seem to have decided to stop using agile/scrum, the testing pipeline breaks all the time, I get an updated labor contract from HR by mail which smells like charred flesh, etc
7. The annoyances become too much to do ANY work. I yell at the other devs outside of the entrance of my cave. There is no answer, only a few painful moans and sighs.
8. I emerge from my cave. The city has turned into a desolate wasteland. The office is a burning ruin, the air sharp and heavy with black soot. Disemboweled corpses of developers litter the poisoned soil.
Product Managers dressed in stained ripped suits scream at each other while they try to reinforce concrete barricades with scotch tape and post-its. *THUMP* Something enormous is trying to break through. "Thank God, bittersweet, you're still alive! The stakeholders! They have mutated! We couldn't meet the promised deadlines! We've lost the whole mobile app department, and that kid there is the last of the backenders and he's only an intern! You're here to save us, right? RIGHT?".
In the corner, between the overflowing coffee machine and a withered cactus, a young boy has collapsed onto the floor. His face is covered in moldy coffee grounds, clasping on to his closed macbook for dear life, wide-open eyes staring into the void, mumbling: "didn't backup the database, and It's all gone" over and over.
A severely dented black Tesla with a dragging loose bumper breaks through the dried up vertical herb garden and the smoothiebar, and comes to a halt against the beanbags in a big cloud of styrofoam balls.
The CEO limps out, leaking blood all over the upholstery. He yells to the COO: "The datacenter is completely flooded with sewage! I saved the backup tapes though", holding a large nest of tangled black magnetic tape mixed with clumps of mud above his head.
9. I collect my outstanding salary and sell any rewarded options/shares for a low dumping price, take a 5 month holiday, and ask a recruiter about opportunities in a different city.14 -
Some1: Can I call you?
Me: Any issue?
Some1: Yeah, need some clarifications.
Me: On, What?
C'mon, why on earth ppl can't provide some context before jumping into a call2 -
Don’t work from exact place you eat everyday or sleep or entertain.
If you can’t focus set timer from 15 minutes to 1 hour and do something else that is not engaging your brain the same way your work does.
Go for a walk.
Take a break from electronic devices.
Take a shower.
Take a nap.
Take a dump.
Make a list of things todo before you eat.
Make groceries.
Clean your house a little.
Make a laundry.
Any manual labor helps if you need brain muscles for thinking.7 -
!rant
Yes! finally 4588 people got fed. I am targeting 10k of people. Get free food from my food bank. Previously people dont know where to get it , now they know it from my platform.
It is so satisfying to see people help the needy get food and groceries.
All of us can do this, as Malaysian government fuck themselves, the rest of us citizens can help each other...4