I sent a professional letter to my boss telling him that i will leave after 15 days. He replied saying :
" stop that bullshit "

The moment an other team couldn't deliver for a deadline. CEO came to me, gave me 50 bucks told me to get a pizza and some hash and just work the night and deliver the damn app. So I did. Got a week holiday for free in return. One of the best guys I worked for.

Worst dev advice?

My first manager said, "You're young and single. You don't have a family. You should spend all of your waking hours on work."

Me thinking, "I understand the importance of extra effort the first few years but I do have a life. One that I intend to enjoy."

Welcome to the team...

Dat ass

Living in the middle east be like

How to get fired (no pun intended)

What do you think ?

Schrödinger’s semicolon

Source: reddit r/programming

Spaces or tabs? - Semicolons!

</2016>
<2017>

Me: This is totally gonna work

Compiler: u tried

Angry programmer:
YOU WANT A PUBLIC KEY?
YOU WANT A PUBLIC KEY?
*smashes keyboard*
THERE'S YOUR PUBLIC KEY

CAPS LOCK – Preventing Login Since 1980.

did

you

just

put

our

entire

kernel

source

code

in

a

pastebin

?

😎 = me, 💩 = client

💩: "I must emphasize that I'm on a tight schedule. I need this done in 2 weeks."
😎: I cut some features and take the job.
As agreed, I send a progress report at the end of the week to get feedback.
💩: *nothing*
😎: He must be busy... I'll call him if he doesn't reply in a few days.
💩: *doesn't answer call*
😎: Time running out, still no feedback, I assume everything is fine and finish it a day before the deadline. Suddenly:
💩: "Hi, how's the project going?"
😎: "...good... WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN???"
💩: "Oh, I went on a quick vacation"
😎: *wants to die a quick and painless death*
"There's only like a day left..."
💩: "Right... Soo, here's the feedback you asked for"
*dumps 4 paragraphs of stupid nitpicking on me (rants following)*
😎: *wants client to die a slow and painful death*

I charmed the graphic designer and we "hung out" a lot at my place during lunch.

The graphic designer was the boss' daughter.

Why human language is inferior to code

Parents with computer problems

This is gold. This developer has a bold captcha solution.