Scary AF!!!

You want comments in my code. ;)

My buddy developer sitting beside me turns away for a discussion. I quickly grabbed his laptop, changed the IDE theme to dark and places it just like it was before.

It took him 15 mins to realize what I have done :P.

This is simple proof of how comfortable a dark theme is.

Award for best survey 2019 goes to...

Realizing...

me: *tries to find a file in system*
Ubuntu: No problem bud, here's a thing which you're looking for
macOS: Sure thing chief, here's your stuff.
Windows 10: Here's a random thing I found on the Internet which is totally irrelavent. By the way, I see you're using Chrome, would you like to start Microsoft Edge instead? 🙃

A group of wolves is called a pack.

A group of crows is called a murder.

A group of developers is called a merge conflict.

A young guy I work with burst into tears today, I had no idea what happened so I tried to comfort him and ask what was up.

It appears his main client had gone nuts with him because they wanted him to make an internet toolbar (think Ask.com) and he politely informed them toolbars doesn't really exist anymore and it wouldn't work on things like modern browsers or mobile devices.

Being given a polite but honest opinion was obviously something the client wasn't used to and knowing the guy was a young and fairly inexperienced, they started throwing very personal insults and asking him exactly what he knows about things (a lot more than them).

So being the big, bold, handsome senior developer I am, I immediately phoned the client back and told them to either come speak to me face-to-face and apologise to him in person or we'd terminate there contract with immediate effect. They're coming down tomorrow...

So part my rant, part a rant on behalf of a young developer who did nothing wrong and was treated like shit, I think we've all been there.

We'll see how this goes! Who the hell wants a toolbar anyway?!

Me after i make a project!! 😅😅😅

Irony is, the person who put this is on his seat is German 🙂 🇩🇪

Reading books, lots of books... Mostly sci-fi or fantasy (I'm in love with Lem) but generally any type of books. 🙃 Currently on the table:
Lem: Master's Voice
James S.A. Corey: Leviathan Wakes

Amateur astronomy, even if I'm no longer doing astrophotography. This is an old photo, I made this in 2010 (it's the Andromeda galaxy, an easy subject).

I like to fold origami mostly following instructions from youtube-videos. It really helps to calm down and relax and it's a great feeling being able to fold figures without instructions after a couple of times.

Here's the little Yoda I've made as a christmas present

Mechanical Keyboards.
I mean, just look at this beauty.

When your boss codes well

Where is the LAN cable and why the hell does my chair not...

Oh.

Meanwhile at NSA:

Alice: Uhm... Bob? I lost my SSH key...
Bob: *facepalms*
Alice: ... but i still have the public key! Could you please recalculate the private one for me?
Bob: Sure, give me a second. I'll fax it to you when it's ready.

Me: *wakes up from nightmare*

Le monday morning after a commit on sunday evening...

PM: BLAAAH!!!! Your commit broke the site, nothing is working!!!!!!
Me: What? All of tests passed (coverage 95%), no issues were found.
PM: NOO!!!! Site is broken, we can't use it no more!!!
Me: Ok, what's the problem?
PM: I've tried to enter -10021 into this field on that page and it gived me an error.
Me: Ok? So, that single page is broken?
PM: No, whole site!!!! This is important
Me: Sure... Let me take a look

* PM tried to enter a negative value into an unsigned field that I've mutated yesterday after checking LIVE database if there was no records with negative value. Reason: we've hit an int limit and there was no chance that the value would be negative. Validation? Well, yes.... Except that page was added by him this morning without even checking everything else *

Me: Here, this is the issue, *gives explanation*
PM: Well.... You shouldn't do this. This is unacceptable. You must never leave int fields without negative values. Didn't they teach you in school that integers can be negative?!
Me: What? *consufed as hell*
PM: *More morale... blah blah blah....* Revert it back!
Me: Ok but if anything else breaks, copy of this slack conversation will be kept.
PM: Don't care! Fix it!
Me: * Reverts the fix, saves chat copy * - Done.
PM: Great.

* 5 wild minutes later *
PM: BLAAAH!!!! Site is down, service is not working, what have you done?
Me: Reverted the change needed for it to work. Todays schedule is full with other important tasks. * pastes a screenshot as a proof that he asked me to do this *
PM: FIX IT NOW! Apply your fix.
Me: You're the PM. - Done.
PM: Great, now I'll fix my code. You should be more careful next time.
Me: * YOU DENSE MATHA...KER * Sure.

How's your morning going? :)