Friend: Hey! How do you uh... alt tab out of the game?

Me: *wtf* Uhhh... You press alt tab.

Friend: *after 10 seconds* Oh! That’s why it is called alt tab.

Me: *crying laugh emoji*

Oh you a computer engineer, can you fix my tv and fridge? :/
Jeez

"Why do you think we should delay launching the new site?"

Because it's late afternoon on a Friday.

"So? What does it matter?"

Here's a bunch of good reasons.

"Nah let's do it today anyways."

In a Skype meeting with a possible new employer.

Unlocks door after meeting and opens door. There stands my current CEO.

"You're locking your door?"
"Yep." *runs away*

Almost shit myself 😂

print ("Hello World") # prints hello world

True!!!!!

Do not waste your time...

Tech Dept set all company phones to the same iCloud account and didn't turn off iMessage..

Boss + HR + random works all just realised they'd been sharing messages.

🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉

When back-end engineers get excited about something.

That moment when your building crashes...!!!

One can measure how well you are doing right now just by counting the number of open StackOverflow tabs.

How does a front-end developer get away with murder?

$('body').hide();

//I'll see myself out

This is why I leave bugs name as features 😉😉😉😝

Boss be like:
Me: Hello Boss I will be unable to come to work tomorrow,due to heavy rains.I am literally living on an island now.
Boss: In your job application you mentioned swimming as your hobby.
See you at work @7am....

Happy Birthday to Me!! A wonderful 17 years on earth.

Wrote for-loop without learning it in school-lesson.

Teacher says I have a gift...

Sad, but true.

This is how my day started.

I was trying to get some cash from an ATM. Instead of vending bank notes as it should, this happened...

I still need that cash...

My father got a iphone 6 last week and has been raving about how much easier it is to use than his galaxy (doesn't understand what "android" is). Just found today that he's been using his previous phone for the alarm clock because he can't find it on his new phone.

Guys I think I found the ideal client

(This was messaged in the groupchat with all 3 devs working on his project)

That awkward moment when you're out and there are so many people around and you have nothing to do. So you take out your phone and browse through the app list and settings... Just browsing and doing nothing. I do that so much. Anyone else like me? 🙈

Happy 25th birthday Linux!

It always throws back ;)

>Dev: How many eggs do you put in the cake?
>GF: 3 or 4
>Dev: Ok, I'll put 7.

I am not a smart man.

Successfully extracted Toyota.

Has anyone ever felt frustrated of being on a computer and having nothing to code?

Boss: Are you busy?
Me: *Schrödinger's silence*.

That time of the week.