Happy new year!
If you feel alone tonight, read your firewall logs.

Girl: we need to talk

Me: OK

Girl: you seem to have more time for your computer than me. I want to know how important I am to you.

Me: You are the number 1 in my life.

Girl: *smiles and hugs me*

Me: (thinking)...Just that I start counting from 0

- Sir, you must put away your laptop before the flight takes off.
- Is a tablet okay?
- Yes
- *Uncouples keyboard from Surface*
- ಠ_ಠ
- (⌐■_■)

Fucking hate it when a website asks for feedback when I just fucking went to their homepage. Fuck you.

She said yes!!!

"Whenever I see a door that says push I pull first to prevent conflicts"

Called into my bosses office one day.
He takes a big swig of mouth wash. I stare at him while he swishes it around in his mouth. He straight up swallows it and tells me he gets a buzz from it.

This is true.

Today we interviewed a _very_ good Angular1 Dev, by chance we showed him the forked ngRouter module we use, after some debate he explained that we were using it incorrectly.. I asked if he'd used it before to which he responded:

"Yeah, I'm the guy who built it"

😅

To all new devs:
- Your language of choice is fine.
- There is no superior way to indent, yours is fine.
- Your IDE is fine.
- Your OS is fine.

Unless you work in my team, of course.

Today I saw a stupid kid at a hardware Facebook group saying that the Core i7 is for laptop and the Core i5 is for desktop...and the worst part is that he thinks he's right. OMG what this kids have in their heads this days...

Programming in a dead pool onesie. I swear I'm an adult

The question of life

"This is a temporary solution" really means "This is a permanent solution"

Certain developers allocated memory before it was cool. they where called heapsters.

Today I figured out how to remotely control my student's computers and how to send them messages when they're not doing the right thing

Interviewer: "What's your greatest weakness?"

Me: "I'd say my greatest strength are my listening skills"

First laugh then comment 😂😂😂

Made me laugh so hard thinking about how often a semi-colon has been my source of depression & self injury

Every time someone posts their multi monitor setup I'm looking at my setup and be like: "Will this community accept me?"

I just had a nightmare.

I never became a developer. Instead I had a normal 9-5, didn't do work at home, slept well and spent my free time on social activities.

It was horrible.

I am more thankful to StackOverFlow and Google than I am to my university.

Life when you didn't know about browsers developer tools

Until i get myself an actual sticker this will have to do...

coincidence?

When you have a super annoying problem that Google has been unable to help with... But you stumble upon a link with the exact title matching your issue... And clicking on it gives you a 404.

void walks into a cave
doesn't return

Amen :p

Have you ever wondered we programmers have so many strong communities.... Stackoverflow, devRant, Reditt, etc...
No other profession has such communities... Why? Why?
Because, we haven't built one for them.... 😂😁

just nope..