No, thank you.😆

"Junior Java developer"
"5+ years experience required"
hmm

One day I am going to open a bar called 'foo'

Are you fucking retarded?

This is a real review for dR

Been programmed to write the loop this way

Favorite stickers are definitely the double-take-inducing stickers I made myself. Here's an AMD in Intel style sticker. I also made AMD Radeon in Nvidia GTX style, and vice versa of both of those. Plus an Intel Potato Inside, and Intel HD Graphics in Nvidia style.

They hold up better than the actual Nvidia stickers, although the color is a little off.

I just had a developer tell me “I’m switching the language of the project from React to HTML”...................... ok.

Pro tip: If you are a junior, or senior but new at the company, don't start your conversations with:

"We're doing X wrong. At my previous company we did / at school I learned /in this book I read / according to this talk I watched, the right way to do X is ..."

Instead try:

"I'm curious why were doing X this way. I'm used to doing it differently."

I love flat-hierarchy teams, and people who think about flaws in procedures and proactively try to improve the tools we use are awesome, but the next kid walking up to me yelling we use git flow "wrong" will be smacked in the face with a keyboard.

If you come to me with curiosity and an open mind, I'll explain, and even return the favor by behaving the same way when I'm baffled by your seemingly retarded implementations.

Maybe we can learn from each other, maybe discover that "how I learned it" is sometimes good, sometimes bad.

But let's start with some social skills, not kicking off into every debate with a stretched leg and a red face.

Now I know why I failed the employment exam

My bird fell asleep on the laptop while licking the shiny LENOVO logo.

I hate that my bios take twice as long as Linux, to start. It is only 15 seconds, but still.

Ok......

I did it, I took the plunge and deleted all my social media. Never felt so liberated

The spam denier
_____

An old phone conversation with a client:

Me : Hello

Client : My website and server are suspended? why is that?

Me : Your server sends spam messages.

Client : We do not send spam messages, we are on vacation, there is none in the office.

Me : Yes, but it is not necessarily you, according to our logs, your server sent spam messages in Chinese and Russian, so someone from Russia or China....etc.

Client : I do not believe you, we do not speak russian or chinese, how could we then write spam messages in those languages?

Me : I told you, maybe someone exploited some vulnerability in your website or server firewall. And if you want to activate your services, please check with your webmaster and sysadmin to secure your ....

Client: I tell you my son, because I am old and I have more life experience than you ... I am 60 years old and I tell you, spam does not exist, and YOU suspended my website and server, and created issues to sell me more of your solutions and services.

I won't check my server, I won't hire a webmaster or a sysadmin, AND YOU WILL ACTIVATE MY SERVER NOW !

(I suddenly realized that I am talking to a wall, so I switched to a robotic tone).

Me : Please resolve the issue to activate your services..

Client : YOU WILL ACTIVATE MY S...

Me : Please resolve the issue to activate your services...

Client : WHAT IS THIS SPAM STORY ANYWAY, I DO NOT BELIEVE YOU ...

Me : Please google that word and you will understand what is spam is...

Client : YOU ARE F**ING LIARS, SPAM DOES NOT EXIST... ACTIVATE MY WEBSITE N.... Beeeep !

I hang up.

Well, I thought about configuring an automatic response for this client, or a for-loop.

His voice was really unpleasant, as if he is a heavy smoker.

got it working!

#easterTechSupport

They lack inventory management

Days and days, 5+ hours later I finally figured out the issue.

The client is just fucking retarded, that's all.

5+ hours of my life wasted, much awesome!

There is someone in our building who urinates like a watering can.; all over the place. Do you think I will get caught if I try to get a DNA match, or install a CCTV to catch the culprit?

Struggle is real

Pretty accurate I would say

Source: https://skillprogramming.com/top-ra...

When optimizing becomes ur curse...

Pulled two hard disks out of a QNAP NAS, and the whole RAID10 died on my. Put one back, and the array came back to life. Pulled another one out, and the array died again. WTF is wrong with you QNAP?

Shower Thought :
I wonder, in the future, since people is easily offended by everything, variable naming would be such a concern it'll be seriously implemented in the compiler, and be like
"Error at 16:1 NamingConventionError : 'fuckThis' is not linear with our guidelines"

Found that a bit funny.

Holy shit I bought some 'entry-level' audiophile earphones, and I never knew you could experience so much joy from music alone 😮

++ contributions in the last year

Devs can hardly stand testers but both of them are an integral part of the development process...

the truth about python...

Wont happen