>Building advertising platform
>Life is good
>Fire up the dev server and open in browser
>No assets
>What the fuck
>Check code and config for like an hour it's all good
>What the fuck
>Try incognito browser, it works.
>What the fuck
>Oh yeah. Adblock. Fuck.

After months and months of unrealistic deadlines, pulling late night shifts coupled with an insane commute and two very small children at home I had a total burnout. Turned up to work one morning, and stared at the Java code I had been writing for the past couple of days and it might as well have been written in Martian. The more I stared, and the more I tried to keep things together internally the less I was able to make sense of anything - just a random jumble of characters on screen that were as intelligible as the green scrolling lines from The Matrix.

My office manager saw that I was obviously in some distress and took me into a meeting room to have a quick chat - and there I was, a grown man of 35 bawling my eyes out like a two year old. Not the most edifying moment of my life.

However, the company couldn't have been more supportive afterwards; one of my colleagues drove the 100 miles to get me home in my car and took a train back up to the office; my GP signed me off work for six months and treated me for severe depression; the office instituted stricter working policies - not on the developers, but the sales/PM teams that were handing down ridiculous timescales simply so they could get a sale.

For my part, I've learnt to push back and say "NO!" - work is not your life, it's an important part of your life, but my no means everything. Don't feel beholden to a company to meet unrealistic targets that you haven't agreed to. Talk.

Make sure your clients are never also your neighbors...

Sure. Just unplug my ethernet cable without asking. Not like I'm trying to work or anything, right?

Obviously!

I accidentally terminated both a client's website and my own in a single click

So I got this as a first step of an interview process.

Oh, thanks, webpack.

:/

Why ask a question if you're just gonna cut me off

So a prospective client told me I look like an addict for asking for a retainer

I thought it'd be a good idea to move my AppData folder

Totally fucked up my laptop

So my client thinks he knows how to code and is freaking out that I won't give him FTP access to the server.

Someone asked me to make a "public and open private communication network for spy agencies"

I love when you stare at a problem for like an hour, then go eat a burrito, ten come back and instantly realise the solution

> Am writing code
> Life is good
> Add debugger keyword
> Script pauses
> Type in var name... Undefined.
> ...What?
> Check out local scope. It's there. What the fuck?
> Add console.log(myVariable)
> Refresh
> Logs variable no problem. Cool.
> Type in my var name
> Undefined

FFFUUUUUUU-

1. Explain how a martian vending machine (wtf?) should look like and how it works.
2. Write a program to change the currency of the machine and price of martian D.
(other tasks irrelevant)

Congratulations for that recruiter guy for coming up with such a creative task *clap*clap*

Gotta love when recruiters try telling me they have a front end role that requires 5+ years experience in Java and Spring.

Get your technologies right

Wtf why do some people create tutorials and start speaking Martian in between?

So I started a new on prem contract. No coffee machine in the office and the kitchen has no utensils. Wtf

Rebuilding instead of refactoring

Hey all, just wondering what it was like for you when starting out your career.

I'm a newish dev, been full time for about a year hired right after my internship. My role has a bunch of hats ranging from DevOps/sys admin to software engineering, sort of a weird mashup of skills so it's not pure software engineering. I mainly work with python, Ansible, and some terraform.

However I still just want to say I'm sorely disappointed in my undergrad classes.

I have a "concentration" in software engineering. I did struggle in classes as I was working full time to pay for classes without taking out loans, but I don't really remember learning a whole lot that was useful in industry.

Overall I just feel like just paid money for a degree that didn't teach me very much useful stuff. Maybe I'm just lacking experience? Maybe what I learned I just don't notice myself applying because it's subconscious?
My coworkers have taught me so much, and I'm very thankful they invested that time into me. I still get ripped to shreds during code reviews lmao (definitely not as much compared to when I first started but I'm also still learning and will always be)
Plus our company docs are pretty good so I can always read through them or search our codebase for examples on how to utilize in house tools etc.

I definitely hit the jackpot with this job, just feeling like I should have been prepared more.

When you have to call the priority line of your hosting provider because the site went down and they're only available between 9.00 and 18.00.

They must be joking...

My Martian Debugger Friend!

So I started a new job. The software is totally proprietary, and honestly pretty outside of my specialty.

And I fucking hate how every time I ask a question someone laughs.

I'm sure they're trying to keep the tone light but after a while it just pisses me off.

Don't make me feel guilty for trying to get assimilated.

When you're on the phone with a support agent who asks you to spell out a URL letter by letter...

...only to finally spell out google.com

Neopets

Just migrated my WHM instance from one server to another and it was actually way easier than expected
✌️

I skip work a lot and I bring my laptop to friends places

😅🙃

"I'll have to jump over the code..."
The Martian