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manager: we need to design an admin system for a veterinary centre
dev: ok, this is it, remember your training
class Dog extends Animal {}13 -
Tech industry: "We need thousands upon thousands of engineers!"*
* With a minimum of 5 years+ experience in about 30 technologies, able to do magic and ride unicorns while working 28 hours pr day just for the lolz of it. We do not provide training, courses or certifications of any kind. You are supposed to be able to pull those out of your ass yourself!7 -
Just found out my wife is pregnant!! So excited! What should our little one's first programming language be? What age should they start learning??
Joy!!24 -
I'm logging my DevRant time as training ... I read all these dumb things that people do, and make mental notes so that I don't do the same thing. Best. Training. Ever.6
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I self-training on PHP, Ruby, Python, C# during 1 year without knowledge in programming. Now I finally find a job as professionnal web developper, without degree !11
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Alright..
fuck'em all !!
They just throw around big words like 'machine learning', 'neural networks', etc like they're supposed to impress people ..
Do something worthwhile then blabber ..
training.. training.. training.. waiting while training for hours with little thought is not working.. !!
They should focus more on developing stuff that takes less time .. !! and think about what they're doing .. !!1 -
Microsoft creates a new chat bot:
Day 1
User : hi
Chatbot: hello, how's yours day? 😁
One month later:
User: hi
Chatbot: fuck off your piece of shit.😡4 -
Here I am, 'Junior' in my title and on my paycheck, training my 'Senior' colleague on the concept of variable types.7
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I JUST GOT THE JOB OFFER!!! They are paying me well and with full benefits and they are going to pay for extended training on top of that!!
This internship was one of my better decisions! :)7 -
I kid you not, this was in some of our official corporate training.
Unfortunately, this often is how our business area "functions"
5 -
Corporate: Phishing Emails are serious. We need you guys to take this awareness training. Please report if you get any suspicious email.
*Sends the awareness training in a format that screams Phishing
Everybody: Wait... is this a test?1 -
The best prank I ever pulled was on one of my IT teachers.
In 2011, I had an intense OOP JS training and whil ...[read more]12 -
Sometimes I love my job, working on client site today.
"Hey we're training a new girl up do you like Warsteiner?"
"Yeah, why?"
Puts pint in front of me
"Thanks"
10 minutes later
"Hey this one was poured by mistake"
Second pint
"Have you tried the San Miguel yet?"
Third pint....4 -
Ok... gotta get this off my chest...
I was tasked to train a junior developer recently. Manager says he's (skill) is rusty, but has potential.
I thought to myself... "Rusty? I can deal with that... how bad can it be?"
He ran into some issues while going through the training material, and asked me for help. It was a simple task of printing something to the screen...
After glancing at his code, I said you have to make it (variable) a string. He LITERALLY types s-t-r-i-n-g...
Me: 😵💫8 -
I hate my job. I am furious at my colleagues.
Last November I asked my colleagues (A and B) to help me learn to use something, let's call it Tool. They said okay and set a date for training. Next week they said that they had too much work to do so we'll have to postpone. And the next date was also postponed and the next one too, and so on.
Three months in, colleague C kept dicking around and being a complete jackass telling me that he refused to work with me for I don't use the Tool.
Not like I didn't want to learn to use the Tool, I simply couldn't. I have long before googled how to use the Tool but in no way can Google ever tell me about our own company workflow, our methods, habits and such.
I was furious, but I am also a the most fucking patient person ever so I let it slide. The Tool wasn't actually needed that much to do my job anyways. And I have known for a while that colleague C needed to push someone under him to feel good about himself.
A few more dates had been set but got cancelled for reasons.
Meanwhile both A and B started to look down on me for not knowing how to use the Tool. I started to feel depressed.
Today B held a "workshop" about the Tool. It took two hours. He was not prepared, had a hangover and generally had a hard time concentrating.
He used aliases that he set up only for himself to show the usage of the Tool instead of commands that a beginner would understand (or google). He kept mumbling and I hsd trouble understanding him. His lecture lacked direction and was all over the place.
I am devastated and furious. I had been waiting since November for this training and when the time actually came he pulled something out of his ass and called it a workshop.
I didn't even get answers for my questions.
Now I feel that I am actually in a worse position than before because while I still cannot use the Tool, they can tell me that there was a workshop and I should've paid closer attention.
I want to quit so bad.23 -
When your boss schedules you for training all week, then asks you why you're in training and gets onto you for not doing your normal tasks... ??? I don't know what I'm doing...!1
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On the job 😊. Told them I could code in the interview... and they believed me.
Now I'm our Director of Technology, and spend at least 8 hours a day building everything from GraphQL APIs to Electron apps. It's been an awesome journey!2 -
I've secured my first software developer job at a large bank in the UK after doing Java Developer training for the last 3 months. I'm so happy!2
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One of the bigger and more important IT projects this fall. Technical solution proposal needs to be ready by Thursday morning but is far from complete. Solution? The responsible person for this went on a two day mindfulness training. Apparently totally oblivious to the term "sense of urgency". Must be a citizen of procrastiNATION.
3 -
!rant
Amazon is giving ML tutorials for free for those of us interested in the field :)
I think its pretty cool that they are providing the training for free, not that they need the money dem greedy basterds!
Here is the link
"BuT aL! AmAZon iZ eViL!!" Yeah fuck it whatever. This is not for you then. Grab a dick and carry on(free dicks for everyone regarding of Amazon and AWS feelings)
https://aws.amazon.com/training/...5 -
Boss: I don't want you spending more than 30 min looking into the problem.
Me: ok
Go back to desk and read or watch some cs training. Maybe related.
Go back to boss.
Me: going to take (over estimate tome) to fix.
Boss: ok.
Go back to desk and fix in less time than estimated.
Look like gold.3 -
Why does it feel like learning to code requires a building of endurance? Like training for a marathon, you have to build up to bigger and deeper learning sessions. Rewarding and frustrating at the same time.
25 -
Starting a new project in a new company. After 4 hours of training and receiving all kinds of new information another collegue passes by and says:
"Hey! So where are you from?"
"I... Don't know..."2 -
Ok... Indentation styles.
Usually I'm an advocate for letting people program how they want as long as it's readable, etc.
But I'm training somebody at the moment and had to bite my tongue when they started doing this...
5 -
New guy (good friend) is on the line with me shadowing. OMFG THESE PEOPLE HAVE HEAVY ACCENTS. Only reason I can hear them is my babysitter has a heavy Vietnamese accent as well, so I'm used to it, but HOLY CRUD this is painful. I feel bad for my newest teammate30
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Business ppl asks for program to be created.
Business ppl send out 5 one hour meeting invites for the week.
Boss puts me in 5 day training for 7 hours a day.
Business ppl tired of me saying I've had no time to develop their stuff.
Boss asks why I haven't made progress on business ppl program.
Trainer upset I'm doing business ppl program instead of the training.
We can't win.2 -
Sitting in an "Advanced Python" course (paid by my employer), I kicked something under my desk. I hope those guys know Python better than they know electrical security measures...
5 -
At my previous job we had to complete an online security training exercise. It shows you how to behave secure in the work place, to not open unknown links etc. The scary part was that the entire training thing was BUILT IN FUCKING FLASH. So I'm suppose to listen to some god damn virus shitting flash application on how to do online security?! Get your shit together before teaching others.5
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When people don't listen to training and just realize today that they can upload files to our internal system.
Its been this way since 2003 you mother fucking idiots.3 -
For those of your who have been following me, I would like to announce that I have received a perfect score for my bachelor thesis (OnDeviceAI, ie. Training neural networks in mobile phones.5
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My new start training at my current place of work.
Learned how to use Linux, terminal, ssh, git, MySQL, how to create basic web apps with Spring, how to write unit tests and UI tests. All in the space of 4 weeks. Best training I have ever been on.4 -
As a resident of Québec (Canada) who has been training for the Google Code Jam for a while, I was sad to read this while filling my application this morning 😑😔
5 -
Years of mandatory corporate IT security training has taught me not to open this car, its probably a virus.
3 -
I just started training 3 weeks ago,
I have to accomplish some knowledge during the training period or the company won't let me stay, when I told the coworker that is sitting beside me, he told me don't worry, as long as you want this job, we will help you learn everything in order to get what you want. -
We just had a security training in my office and a sentence in the PowerPoint slide suggested that we should always update windows. I'll pause here. Also they were using Windows XP screenshots to refer.
¯\_(ツ)_/¯2 -
I have set up a livestream where you can watch the training process of my becomeranter script.
The chatbot will be accepting requests in a bit on who to train on next. Once it's up, feel free to add yourself or others to the training list.
Here is the stream:
HTTPS://twitch.tv/retrylife10 -
Manager: we need to design an admin system for a veterinary centre
Dev: ok, this is it, remember your training
namespace Vetcentre{
class Dog : Animal {
}
}1 -
No documentation. Thousands of lines of code. Still learn enough about the solution to make a required change in a day. Now the company feels like I should be the one to lead training for the module, and I still don't know what the other half of the code does. T-minus two hours...2
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Just got invited to an interview as Junior Sys Admin of a hacking training platform. This could be my first job in IT. Woop woop.
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The devs I work with. One more so than the other, but seeing as this is my first dev job, and I have no formal training, they've been my mentors. Yeah, we disagree and argue - but they're bloody good quality, and I'm very lucky to be learning from them.
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My busdriver today must have had thorough training in trobleshooting it-systems.. nothing on the bus was working, Doors, card reader, and it baerly moved forward. So trying to solve this problem he stoped at every busstop, turned the engine off and by this powered off all systems. Felt like the Classic solution people tell others, "have you tried turning it off and then on". So all other passengers were pissed because the bus was running late, and I felt kind of sorry for him..5
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Taking a for-giggles training on reverse engineering... It's theory. Basic level theory. Posted 6 months ago.
"someone might want to reverse engineer Microsoft Word in order to change its code so that it could be run on a Mac."
Are we ignoring how old Word has had Mac support????
Or "To prevent circumvention, some programs require as part of the terms of use that you do not attempt to reverse engineer their code." like this will stop someone who wants to circumvent having to pay from acting illegally, because we all totally read EULAs and T&Cs...
Whyyyyyy4 -
Yes, my Python scripts are not remotely pretty. But then, neither was my nonexistent formal training in scientific computing. And no, I will not 'write two lines of comments for every line of code'. Physics major programmer problems.1
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(tl;dr) Protip: never take internship/training/job offers from startups.
Fucking piece of shit startups hiring innocent interns from University, hoping that they are full stack developers to build their shit website.
"I will throw challenges at you".
You fucking scum, I need a proper mentor to teach me something which is not my fucking domain. You expect me to know nodejs and reactjs, and if I don't know that means there's something wrong with my learning process?!!
I'm looking for an internship which basically means that I get company exposure to proper training unlike being your fucking slave, you uncultured swine.
Seriously, recruiters, these days jack off to google buzzwords.5 -
I have started my first job as a web developer since February 1st. During the one month training period which is in progress, one of the training sessions was on Git and believe me Git is the most fascinating thing came to know me since I have joined computer science field. In love with it.2
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Sometimes I wonder why my company has a helpdesk for our customers when the help desk doesn't even know how to use the product we sell. I spend more time supporting our helpdesk than I do programming.3
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When I started on the job I was placed underneath a senior employee.
Never got as much training as I wanted to.
Bc less then a week later they messaged in the group chat they were quiting.3 -
Client asked our team to do accreditation for using sitecore cms. So I allowed my boss know:
1. I am a damn software engineer, not a fucking content administrator.
2. Even if accreditation was for technical part with dotnet, there is no fucking way I am gonna learn and use it, because I am hired and paid as php fullstack dev.
3. Every smart person on this world knows that that expensive pile of crap has no advantages over open source solutions (funny thing: heads of management in client’s company claim sitecore is going to be the platform of the future... what a joke...).
So, today we are having first training session, skype meeting with mentors from India (facepalm).
Also, we got credentials for sandbox sitecore environment, tried to login and navigate around a little bit, my browser crashed after a while.
Nightmare is coming up...
Will keep you updated guys after training.7 -
Nothing like taking a company IT security training that requires Flash.
The first step to be able to run the training?
Override your browser's security setting to allow Flash to be able to run.
Anyone else see the irony here?1 -
#define RANT 0
My paid training to become a dev starts today. Or rather in half an hour. God damn it I'm nervous. Even though I'm already kinda experienced. I'll be that company's first trainee.
It will be mostly C#.
I enjoyed my 2 month long holidays that lasted until now, though.4 -
Back story tldr: our team had certification on using sitecore, because client asked...
More: https://devrant.com/rants/1827849/...
So we have completed training, it took 4.5hours. Must say, I expected no less of training from India, though respect points to mentor, surprisingly he had quite understandable accent.
Anyway, was working whole training on my side project, so just had quick glances on the screen what that guy was doing. But he just confirmed my opinion about sitecore - it’s a pile of shit. Then he tried to publish all the changes he made and (drums playing 🎶) after minute of loading - error (attached screen). Oh and he was keep mentioning how beautiful and awesome sitecore is 🤮.
After training last part was left: a questionnaire of 13 questions. To pass, at least 70% score is needed. Questions in docx, and answers supposed to be entered in excel file and then sent via email.
Ok, I open excel file on mac with numbers, I see 3 sheets:
1. Table with empty cells for answers
2. Table with correct answers
3. Scores that should be calculated after submitting.
Well, numbers (app) doesn’t support all excel features, so turns out sheet2 was supposed to be protected with password, and third one be hidden until answers are submitted. What a fail.
So yeah, I completed accreditation with 100% and don’t even remember a shit about sitecore.
2 -
A friend of mine just told me his job made his company start "Lean Six Sixma" training which is basically a massive scheme that makes you get a karate belt in common sense that you apparently don't have.2
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Fuck deadlines... Here is a mandatory training that is more important even tho it is irrelevant to your role4
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Was using six years old laptop with first gen Intel core i3 to train a neural net, placed the laptop on soft bed, training begins, thermal shutdown after 30-40 iterations(30 minutes).F***.
Now starting again :'|3 -
Junior dev told me that he would like to use a powerful editor, I forced him to use only VI for 30 min, now my boss sent me an email about "appropriate training methods" for the colleagues.3
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In a meeting with customers to agree on the scope of a new project...
Me: "Hey, we could do this awesome thing that will save you a lot of time that nobody's brought up or mentioned and will take us an extra 4 weeks to implement."
Horrible, but it's my way of training my PMs to leave me out of meetings.4 -
Training model for 3 days now. Turns out there is a hidden
minor-bug causing a major bias on output. The result is actually within a error margin. But this is so unnecessary. Should i start over?7 -
Just started my exams training! (Doing a study called Application Development).
The application doesn't sound that complicated but I have to implement a data exporting feature. Sounds alright, doesn't it?
THE 'CLIENT' DOES NOT KNOW WHAT DATA FORMAT THE FICTIVE CUSTOMERS CAN PARSE/HANDLE BUT I HAVE TO MAKE IT GENERIC SO THAT THEY CAN USE IT ANYWAYS. HOW THE FUCKING FUCK AM I SUPPOSED TO KNOW WHAT FUCKING FORMAT I SHOULD CHOOSE?!? SHOULD I TRY TO SMELL IT OR SOMETHING?
FML.2 -
It's hard training fresh grads at work when their minds are already full of themselves. Code written for production is always different from those written for projects.5
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Made the mistake of training my ML model in VirtualBox... Over 18 hours so far, and loss < 1 is nowhere near stable.1
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Was supposed to start my exams training today (Application Development study). At the daily scrum, I told the scrum master (teacher) that I heard (I did hear that tho btw) that the training only starts next week so 'if I could work on my framework to get it ready for the training'. I know I'm supposed to start today with my project but I rather finish my framework really.
He fucking said YES.
So this will be a happy week of framework programming :D -
I fucking hate hr trainings. What a waste of time.
Let me do my job. If you are sending me to training, at least make it relative to my field.1 -
*Completes unit testing training*
*Achieves fresh perspective*
*Looks at game code*
*Prepares to right unit tests for that problem method*
*Stares at code as crickets chirp*4 -
I try to exercise a lot of patience when training other devs. Hell, I have always asked stupid questions and will continue to do so. But yesterday I almost reached my breaking point when the guy I was training (who is not young nor entry level) asked me where the CSS files were for a static HTML page. I had to awkwardly say, "they're located at the path being linked to in the head" 😣4
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Got my first task today while still being under training (large worldwide corporation - OMS department) and I'm practically drowning! Oh you wonderful devs give me strength!4
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Three days into my job and the client is asking when we can start my project... Supposed to have two weeks training, and I don't even think that's enough to learn Hybris, so instead of being an angry rant I'm just gonna sit here and be a sad one :(
I can already feel the incoming shame. Shame. Shame...7 -
Well, this one is easy. It gotta be this year, as a finally finished my 2 years training as a software developer in July and I'm still working for the company that trained me.
Just as context, in Germany you have to train for a job for 2-3 years before you can actually start working in the field. During this training, you're essentially working at a company, get (reduced) pay and go to school every now and then. The training ends with a final exam, after which I could finally call myself a software developer. :-)7 -
Had a new co-worker I was responsible for training. I am several years his junior, but he is working with a new language/framework I'm fluent in. Day 4 into training, he walks into my cubicle, sidles up next to me, I look up at him, he farts loudly, then (without seeming to realize what he's done) he proceeds to launch into a long-winded question about coding best practices.
If this were an isolated incident, I'd have written it off, but the dude did it again when he came to my desk and asked me to open a jar of pickles for him, and many times over during casual conversation.1 -
It’s great how HR tells you to report to work on your first day to your line manager, but also tells you to attend training in another country before you start working, BUT they don’t tell you when the training is, how stuff will be paid for, or how to contact anyone in the company to find this info out5
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Just got picked in a national “lottery” for mandatory military training for a year. And I moved to another city more than half a year before, got a very good job. Fml. Europe at that5
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I know that you two guys don't get together well. Shall we(the management team) send you guys for some team bonding training sessions? Whatttt?? 🙄🙄🙄4
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I have to make a big decision about my future as a developer...
(Long rant)
I am currently in an apprenticeship as a dev.
The thing is i was forced to do testautomatization.
I was there for half a year and had a good time.
But now my trainer (the guy who assigned me all the work and showed me all the stuff I learned) has been fired.
And now it sucks... they don't teach me new things anymore and don't give me time to catch up with the new technologies.
(This was different in the past!)
I was forced to do manual testing for the past few week.
Therefor i am working with a friend and his trainer.
One day i was talking to my friend about how things have changed in the testing-team.
His trainer was listening (we did not know) and sayed: If you want i can ask my boss if it is possible that i can teach you as well.
Now the point is i woud love to work with him. I love the work they do!! (Java; don't hate me)
But it will make the testing guys mad and I dont know how HR will react.
I am pretty sure it will reduce my chances of getting a job (at this company) if I change the team...
Should I talk to HR or not? What do you think?
Thanks for reading and sorry for my english bugs.6 -
i7, 8GB RAM with 2GB nvidia graphics couldn't handle the training of neural net on a google text corpus! -.-"
I'm just watching it train, nothing to do! oh but wait,I can rant! 😃😃5 -
So we've had a new guy on our team for over 6 months now... Been training him up doing shadowing.... Training courses... Study time... The works...
He didn't have the specific skills for our team but had 2 degrees, lectured at uni... Seems VERY smart......
Yet he still has barely grasped the basics..... When experienced people talk about challenges they've had he tries to suggest what they do... Constantly raising 'problems' with ways of working but offers no solutions and never collaborates on how we can fix it......
He avoids doing practical learning and thinks he can learn the job from reading docs... .. Sigh....
Gone almost as far as doing daily check ups on what he's actually doing to make sure he's progressing..... Tough one to crack!7 -
Corporate Training: to lock your screen press ctrl+alt+delete and select lock screen.
Non-Dev: need to lock screen, ctrl+alt+delete... It's not responding... Ctrl+alt+delete.... Wait why did my computer reboot.... NOOOOOOOO... MY WORK
Me, Dev: uhm I just used Win+L...2 -
AI is never going to write code efficient like Humans do.
The whole AI, neural network bullshit is overrated.
Training a Network to recognize Images or playing Super Mario is far away from writing code.4 -
Just received a Jira request to remove training videos from the business ethics page or our employee intranet because we longer hold the license's.
HaHa1 -
Disappointment is when you're interested in learning about something but neither Lynda.com nor Tuts+ have any training so you have to buy the book and read :-(
7 -
"So what we're going to do is sign you up for this basic training we think you need despite your years of proven experience and certifications and a four year degree directly related to the type of training don't count"1
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People who went to a weekend training course and now believe they are Gods of "the cloud" and "web scale" and "devops".6
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Starting dev job with .NET (various stack levels I think) in a couple months, beginning with a paid intro course. Any tips for stuff I should look out for, awesome training tools etc? Background: java, some js, some Python.4
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Was going through tech training and using tight VNC to access remote machine. A colleague was also accessing the same machine.
When instructor walked around to view my progress, my colleague closed my tab and opened sites like 'church of satan' and porn sites.
😐 -
I didn't realise that so many people in a dev social space cannot differentiate SE from CS...
Also, lecturers should have some mandatory teaching training, just because you have an area of expertise, doesn't inherently imply an ability to teach the material to the students. Powerpoints, and endless incoherent monologues are the bane of my existence2 -
Quick question:
Anyone here has any apps that they want to get tested for vulnerabilities and stuff?
I am training for job in it-security field but it's hard to find a starting point for testing a real app/site/whatever
So I would like to test some stuff you guys make, just for fun8 -
How long do you recommend 'sticking it out' in a new role? I moved 2,500km for a new job and so far I have been training on the worst development platform I have ever seen, produced diagrams, printed documents and taken meeting notes 😡. #IJustWantToProgram
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!school rant!
I have offically lost my entire faith, doesn't matter in what, point is that all of it.
We are literally learning about control panel and stuff... Basically the whole class is laughing, this teacher is bad shit crazy.
7 -
Our boss has organized a personal trainer so he makes workouts with us every Thursday in the working place. Then you realize how much you are sitting in front of the computer. Just awesome.2
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An open source, psychology based job placement and training platform. Free for anyone that wants to put the work in, and for those who want to gain teaching experience. To ultimately put colleges and technical schools out of business.1
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Went to work pretty excited this morning, and found out that my neural network that has been training all weekend was still dumb as fuck...
No need to fear artificial intelligence (at least not mine) -
I applied for an unknown job.
Email: you'll be taking Junior Developer
Interviewer: We need fullstack developer with a salary of $100 for two months of training and $450 if you have great accomplishments9 -
Just got home from training, girlfriend is out for the evening, no other dues; perfect time to play some games.
...aaaaaand they're doing maintenance on the cables for another hour 😶1 -
Things I learned in this 2 month training in an IT company ;
- the way @marcerisson wanted me and my group project team to use Git (and kept yelling at us about ) is actually the proper, professional way of using Git
- there is a difference between an MVC model and a fucking pack of overcomplicated spaghetti code
- commenting your code and naming your variables properly IS IMPORTANT especially when another dev might read it 15 years later (i see you Mr I Name All my Variables With the Name Of the Function and A Number)
- « if it worls it ain’t stupid » also apply in a professional area
- where ´s my fucking rubber duck2 -
AWS released their machine learning training portal for the public for free. You can get certified for 300$.
https://aws.amazon.com/de/blogs/...1 -
I was reading this earlier:
https://strongerbyscience.com/genet...
---------
Sure enough, that’s what they found; the athletes who used the training plan matched to their genotype got almost 3x the results, on average, compared to the athletes who trained with the protocol mismatched to their genotype.
---------
So, what's the cheapest way for me to find out my genotype for this purpose ?11 -
Nothing feels more dead than ur shitty windows Lap going updating mode in a training session surrounded by whole lot of mac users....!
Yeah mothaf**** I can hear u laughing behind me.! -
Just thought I'd mention that there are some assets and training material for cryengine available on humble bundle right now for those of you who are into game dev2
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Anyone know of any good reference material that teaches you how to implement and train your own Yolo object localization neural network? (Preferably for tensorflow) I'm not looking for pretrained models that you just downloaded and run, rather a tutorial that walks you step by step through the implementation of the network, the reasoning behind the architecture, and examples of the training data used for the training as well as the process of training?
I know it's a lot to ask but it's really frustrating when ever example is just "clone this repo, hit run and use the pretrained models" sure it might get you up and running quickly but it doesn't really teach you anything...
P.s. - seems like every educational post goes from super simple to super complex without any middle ground and the super complex stuff doesn't tell you why its used the way way it is.5 -
After a long day of project management and endless emails, I would go home and dig through books and online training programs on html and css. A few weeks later I really found that enjoyed the work.
A year later I took the leap, quit my job and went back to school. Great decision. -
Started doing deep learning.
Me: I guess the training will take 3 days to get about 60% accuracy
Electricity: I dont think so! *Power cut every day lately
My dataset: I dont think so! *Running training only achieve 30% of learning accuracy and 19% of validation accuracy
Project submission: next week
😑😑😑2 -
Gotta stop providing better code solutions to crap that's not my business, roped into so much crap and now I have to put all these bad code fixes into some intern training scenarios or something...fml
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We're having a training session on how to speak with clients because we're getting feedback that we seen annoyed in our emails.
Probably my fault, not that I mean for that to bleed through into my replies1 -
More WTFery from official corporate training.
This gem of a quiz comes right after the slide saying not to click on or open emails you suspect are spam. To reinforce the idea, click on the spam!
It's the kind of test that makes me go, "is this a trick question?"
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I am in an apprenticeship as a software developer so you might think I would have lots of stories to tell in wk73 but you could not be more wrong! Our school teachers don't care about us or the thing they teach!
BUT in the first year, our company payed to send all of their IT trainees to a special training facility and the coaches there where amazing!!!👍🏼
For every IT related subject there was a coach! And they were fucking experts!
Let me tell you how this "training" worked:
1. Basic introduction to a certain subject
2. Some basic tasks
2.1 Extended tasks for those who want to dig into it
3. Search some other students to team up
4. Define project
5. Discuss the project plan with a coach.
6. Realize project
6.1 - Question rises -
6.2 Discuss question with coach
6.3 Coach prepares prepares presentation on the questions subject
6.4 Coach sends out invitation to everyone
6.5 LEARN AND PROFIT
7. Awesome product is finished
8. Present project to other students
The awesome part about this is that the coaches pushed us to our limits (so we would keep improving) but they would assist with every problem you faced.
They where relatively young and the spirit within the teams were amazing!
Because not all IT trainees have this kind of training the professional school is pretty boring ever since...
But I silently thank them for that training after every exam at school. -
I am in the process of rewriting BecomeRanter, and have built a much better training process..
Who wants to be used as training data?
I will train the neural network on you, then send you some of the output..
An example of an earlier version of this project can he found at: @windowsss6 -
Anyone else out there got any QlikView Certs? Got mine this summer for a summer job. they paid for the training and everything.1
-
I had a training about secure software engineering recently. Today was the corresponding exam.
One of the questions was a list of 4 hackers and you should pick the one who was in jail.
That question was so unreal... I was speechless.4 -
Lately nothing compares to the excitement and happiness of executing my first successful buffer overflow.
-
!rant just a question. Sorry in advance for the long post.
I've been working in IT in Windows infrastructure and networking side of things for my entire career (5years) and recently was hired for a role working with AWS.
We use Macs and we use *nix distros for days. I've only ever dabbled for 'funsies' before with Linux because every previous job I held was a Windows house and f*** all else.
I'm just wondering if anyone here might have some insights as to a great way to learn the Linux environment and to learn it the right way. I'm not the best Windows admin ever and will never claim to be, but I have seen stuff that other people have done that makes me want to swing a brick at someone's head. And I feel that with all of the setup wizards and the "We'll just do it for you." approach that Windows has used since forever it allowed enough wiggle room for people that didn't know what they were doing to f*** sh*t up royally. I'm not familiar enough with Linux to know if this is also a common problem. I know that having literal full-access to every file in your OS can cause a n00b like myself to mess up royal, thus the question about learning Linux the right way.
I vaguely understand the organization of the folders and file structure within Linux, and I know some very basic commands.
sudo rm -rf /*
Just kidding
But All of my co-workers at my new job are like mighty oaks of knowledge while I'm a tiny sapling. And at times I've been intimidated by how little I know, but equally motivated to try and play catch-up.
In addition to all of this, I really want to start learning how to program. I've tried learning multiple times from places like codecademy.com, YouTube tutorials, and codeschool.com but I feel like I'm missing the lesson that explains why to use a certain operation instead of another. Example: if/else in lieu of a switch.
I'm also failing to get the concept of syntax in certain languages I've tried before. Java comes to mind real fast.
The first language I tried teaching myself was C++ from YouTube. I ended up having a fever dream that night about coding and woke up in a cold sweat. Literally, like brain overload or something. I was watching tutorials for like 9 hours straight.
Does anyone know of a training resource that will explain, in terms a 5 year old would understand, what the code is doing and why? I really want to learn but I'm starting to lose steam cause I'm just not getting it.
Thank you in advance for any tips guys and gals. I really appreciate it. Sorry for the ridiculously long questions.5 -
manager: i heard that bitcoins' price just dropped. can you teach me how to trade bitcoins?
*apparently he saw me taking the blockchain trainings provided by the company. told him i only know they work but not trading. i feel like he's so disappointed1 -
Hey you were not here yesterday so we assigned you to do this job that requires this training and is really fun and good for your experience
Says the coworker that was supposed to do it but does not want to do it because he thinks the work takes too much time and doesn't think the training is usefull.
Sorry what???1 -
I can't decide which is worse
I changed the wrong if statement accidentally sent out 15k emails to a clients customers.
Or
Imported a dump of the database instead of take a dump while a colleague was on site training the client on their software.... But found a flaw in our server backups.1 -
poor huawei never knew even their beloved brutus would stab em in their back...
et tu google? https://developer.android.com/train...
2 -
I used to work in IT support during my training, this is the most accurate description of the job:
If everything just works people will be like "what do we pay you guys for?" And if something doesn't work: "what do we pay you guys for?" ...*sigh*1 -
If you think some developers are a dumb.... you've never met support...
They need "training" to use systems they should already know...
I didn't know the system much either but just by looking at the screen and trying a few simple options, I figured it out...
I need a new word, and maybe job, what is dumber is than a monkey?5 -
Just heard a QA member say whilst training a starter:
'We are going to do some hacking now'
He just changes a URL argument.5 -
I'm more of a computer person (obviously, that's why I'm here), but I'm super proud of myself that I was able to replace a belt in my car!
Next comes the brakes, but that one can wait a week or so...4 -
I hate when I have to take these shitty training modules when my company starts fucking a new vender.
-
Any devs out here who are into martial arts training ?
It's been a month since I joined kickboxing classes. However , I have never met a fellow dev who is into martial arts. What about you guys ?15 -
If I ever want to phish people at an enterprise I would send the email as the yearly infosec training course.1
-
Taking required compliance training on preventing bribery and money laundering...
Me: we need to manually prevent it? How well has that worked in the past.... And you know with Russia... -
Has anyone here heard of codewars? It's a website I've been using it for the past few years to train myself for programming competitions. I highly recommend taking on the challenge of one problem per day.
-
Client: I'm not able to see the mount storage
Me: share your configuration
Client: 📃
Me: (frustrated but still kind and polite) I see the ports are swapped between hosts which is the culprit behind the issue.
Me: can I ask the reason behind doing this?
Client: I thought red color goes left and aqua goes right.
Me: 🦍 🤐🤐 -
Two years ago, i made my graduation and started my training as system administrator. Today I got an email in my inbox; subject: like to help us?
My former IT teacher / admin asked me if I would like to create the new IT infratructure for the new school building. I never thought, that I ever go happily back to school %)1 -
I can't help but smirk when my company gets a project that requires knowledge on something I warned them about over half a year ago. This happens regularly but every time we have to get that knowledge during the project, costing the customer additional money.
When will management learn that training your employees will benefit them :(3 -
Just signed my training contract 🎉Quitting university to become a programmer within 18 Months apprenticeship3
-
Developer-in-training at OSU, worried about being able to find a job. Contributing to an open-source project right now to try to hone my skills. Any advice from the more experienced?3
-
Taking mandatory corporate compliance training that says what things I am not allowed to do...
BUT it's actually quite interesting because I never knew you could do these and well it's starting to give me ideas.... -
So I was attending a Scrum Master training recently. During the introduction, the coach is making sure everyone understands why are they even on this training and stresses out that for a company to be able to actually become agile and survive the transition, people of different levels and roles/responsibilities should get familiar with Scrum, not only IT/developers.
Coach: I can see we have developers, testers and people from operations in the room, good. Too bad there's noone from the actual business. Anyway, who decided that you should come to a Scrum training and become certified?
Group: Well, the business..
#ironic1 -
Building up a simple AI with a neuronal layer. Trained him to do XORs with a large set.
Training set done, trying out if he learnt :
Print result : 0.6...3 -
When you got to work early because of training; only to find out it was moved to start after three hours with organizer announcing that there was "error from our side"
Me:🖕🖕 -
So after waiting 3 days for an ID to get into a computer, I'm now told it's going to take 12-14 hours before I can do online security training just so I can actually start working. I'm only at this job for a month and I'm not going to even touch any real work at this rate...
Oh well, at least I'm paid by the hour, not by the amount of work -
Here are my goals
-Don’t wait until last moment to resolve issues
-Be a good developer and training interns so that they will have something to take away
-Learn more stuff -
When they change the ethics,health&safety,anti corruption etc. online courses so that the next links are disabled until the audio is completed.
-
WORDPRESSS DEVELOPERS:
What’s your #1 tip for getting started in this role? Useful training site or video? What’s best to focus on first? Hooks? I need all the juicy deets! 🙌🏻8 -
When "staff training" at the company you work for is just assigning someone with zero experience or education to you in the hope they gain knowledge via the little-known method of osmosis.1
-
Mandatory training ... Coarse introduction video crashes 20 secs before end, can only proceed with the coarse by finishing the introduction video ... 🤦♂️🙈🤷♂️
-
Training a ML model is easy. Getting high accuracy on both cross validation and test sets is a different story.
-
Not training properly in the first 7 years of my programming career, which is theselast 7 years 😓
As a result, I have to re-do a big part of my work because I don't trust my older self around computers.3 -
Assigned mandatory online training... Finally got some time to do it from my busy week fixing a prod issue... But the training website is completely broken....
Just another reminder of why things always blow up around here
-
Almost out of highschool, looking at the requirements for programming jobs is terrifying. I can't afford college but almost every job needs a bachelor's. Hoping for a company that sees the value of training from the base level5
-
Love going to out-of-state programming courses on the company dollar!! Went to Germany, Denver, and Rochester, NY for Codesys training. Hate PLC programming but it's fun traveling and learning new things.
-
Does anyone know of a good place for coding challenges? I want to keep practicing my coding, but I'm terrible at coming up with projects.3
-
When I, a front end developer, have to work with backend, and to integrate everything with front end with zero help and even less training in that specific area. And oh, its php!!2
-
My Brain:
It's Monday and I've already had a tiring morning... don't feel like doing anything else....
I KNOW!!!! I received an email last week about some mandatory training that needs to be completed... time to do it now!
Yep, I'm not being lazy or procrastinating... -
Seriously trying not to fall asleep during compliance training at work....there's SIX HOURS worth of content each employee has to go through annually on their bday month....it's making me so slee....😴1
-
I provide training for our clients on our company CMS after having built them their sites.
I once had 3 ladies could me in for their FREE training session who were incredibly rude. They I territories me mid sentence to talk about unrelated stuff, spoke over me, were clearly uninterested in learning the system, and devolved the meeting into their own board meeting.
I didn't know how to deal with such rudeness without being rude back long story short they left having learned nothing, too dumb to work the system out themselves and I find ways to be unhelpful each time they ring up to ask for support they haven't paid for...4 -
Last week I had two days training about how to code modern with the language I use.
Now I wanna refactor every single line of code I ever wrote :D3 -
https://github.com/enkidevs/...
https://github.com/sagelabs/...
A repository says more then a thosand words.1 -
Doing an Oracle training course and the first ten minutes is spent equating electricity to Big Data. Now I'm waiting for Oracle to develop a general theory of relativity based on exorbitant license fees.2
-
Ideal dev job would be to work on pretty/girly fashion or cosmetics websites, have drama free and knowledgeable co-workers, decent salary, great organization, external training opportunities, cute modern office, dogs, cats and a cafe on site, a dope recharge room & no talking to clients ever.4
-
So radio ads for federation training keep touting having available courses in IT... Check the website and IT isn't even fucking listed... Thanks guys -.-
-
Waiting 3 days for your graphics card to get trough all training data to see if you wasted your life with bad architecture.13
-
Bring Word Art into the 21st century. Most of early computer training hinged on the use of Word Art.
-
Got the offer, accepted, just put in my notice. Flying out to silicone for training in 2 weeks, all uphill from there.4
-
Video 147 of god knows how many. I hate video based training. I wish my company wasn’t so cheap when it comes to training.
-
I'm a brand-new employee for my college's IT service. During my training, I was given a briefing on their security system. After something broke, he tapped into an administrative database on his chromebook, then he went to go check something while leaving the chromebook alone with someone he just met for over 30 minutes.2
-
I need help!
I have recently scraped ALOT of news article data and formated for training data. This adds up to 5.6gb. Where can I upload this for people to access as I think it's quite useful. I have tried GitHub LFS ( Large File Storage ) but topped out account at 1gb. Also I don't really want to pay for hosting.2 -
I am one year experienced Android developer... just got an opportunity to work as a game developer in the same company(they will provide training)... I'm in dilemma whether to accept or no.. Is it safe to keep on changing fields😟7
-
I need a side project but i'm stuck on "what". I've ever had a side project, it helps training my mind and skills furthermore this "habit" helps me to not waste my time in unuseful things and keep me away from bad thoughts.
-
Finally got a job offer, just waiting on the official letter, I am eager to hand my two weeks in. I'm even tempted to quit outright once I have the offer letter. (No one is under me, there's no training I can provide, no needed bridges would be burned)4
-
The training courses I am currently writing for work. I just love learning stuff, and sharing that knowledge. It's a lot of work though.
It's actually really strange. I am a real introvert, and hate every human, but I love to stand in front of a dozen people and train them...3 -
Anyone know any challenges or training sessions, by some development firm or company that send us goodies upon finishing them? I stumbled upon a similar one by Google, the 30 Days on GCP challenge.
-
what have i got myself into???? full stack development for my internship without previous and complete knowledge of it... i guess i have 2 months to do intensive training and practice to prepare myself AAAAaaaaaAaaa4
-
I have Dell latitude 3379 with on-board graphic card
Do you think it's enough for training ANN and doing a small ML project or I must improve it to laptop with Nvidia graphic card?6 -
That moment when gulp run is as long as one epoch when training my neural network. How did we arrive here?
-
Hungover, spent 6 hours on redundant training, some guy spat at me because I didn't have time to stop and give him change for his train fare.
Man, life is abso-FUCKING-lutley great right now isn't it?! -
Just uploaded my first practice project on GitHub. It is an AI based flower identifier. Any advice or guidance is extremely needed. I want to become good in training neural networks. Please provide feedback! Thanks.
https://github.com/Jatin287587/...8 -
Just Found pretty amazing stuffs with tensorflow and tensorboard.
It is great to have views and graphs of your training nodes
-
So I'm trying to get used to linux. Is there a site or something with tasks, so you can practice the most common linux tools?3
-
Anyone know any good free courses to learn programming for a total beginner?
The guy who needs it is looking to work with JavaScript and Node eventually.3 -
What specifications should I look for when looking for a laptop I want to program with? I prefer Windows OS and I'm training to be a web developer.3
-
My officemate who works for the company for the past 7years and counting. Doing QA for a supply chain erp; doing it for like 5 yrs and still asks for the basic / "happy path" scenario training. Like what kind of training do you need? It's been 5 years since your'e doing it!!
-
Just started working at a new (very different) software engineering job after moving back home. The two hardest things in my training were: getting used to the French keyboard (azerty instead of qwerty) and Windows 10 after using macs exclusively for the past 5 years.
Why Windows why?3 -
Interview: "We provide on going training for all our developers."
After hire:
do
{
// lie to employee
Console.WriteLine("We'll have to schedule some training for you.");
// wait 30 days
System.Threading.Thread.Sleep(2592000000);
}
while (IsEmployeeStillWorkingHere()) -
Just had a cross training where the presenter kept pronouncing asynchronous and async as "awe-synchronous" and "awe-sync".
Nice job, but not awe-some.1 -
Questions more then a rant...
I've moved from being a lead on imploring DevOps and Agile practices in a large Telco to now working for a security consultancy... The team I'm with are s*** hot when it comes to SecOps (which is why I changed jobs) and I've been hired to he the automation and working practice expert on the team. Already got some of them learning Ansible which is a great start!
I've got delivery now being pushed to Git and all client work being tracked in Jira and properly documented and collaborated through HipChat and other CI tools on the way....
My question is this... Does anyone have some awesome resources to teach people Git, Jira, Jenkins, etc. quickly without forking or branching out on expensive training? Focus on being a technical but consultative team. Ideally just wanna pull some awesome guides and make. My own commits on them for the team... Please fire a story or epic away!1 -
Well I used to be that guy who was always cursing gradle sync but I realize I was just preparing myself for this, the next level!
10 -
Alright, I got a question: as a beginner, how so you identify that when something goes wrong with a product, that it was your fault? My boss just Slacked me that one of the websites we're working on has a problem where the buyers can't place an order because I allegedly used the wrong database table. Which I don't remember doing. But maybe I did.8
-
Finished vocational training! :) Fulltime front-end guy now. #happy no hassle with shitty school or something anymore - lets focus on side projects again :)
-
When training course planned couple months ago gets canceled because you are the only One that can fix a bug before upcoming release. Sad and happy at the same time.
-
I'd like to work for a small software house that pays decent, understands a life/work balance (40hr/wk), has a relaxed environment, worries more about the end product than timelines, and gives you Fridays to work on pet projects and training.
-
Java trainer: "...object orientated..."
Jesus Christ! Get it right, pronunciation matters! And you're teaching it to beginners! -
So I started a new job. The software is totally proprietary, and honestly pretty outside of my specialty.
And I fucking hate how every time I ask a question someone laughs.
I'm sure they're trying to keep the tone light but after a while it just pisses me off.
Don't make me feel guilty for trying to get assimilated.2 -
My boss just asked me to automate the training data tagging process so that I don't have to do it manually. He's so kind.1
-
!Rant
I have my first interview on Wednesday for an insanely good opportunity.
It's a junior role through and through, 10 weeks training and bringing up to speed.
They said don't prepare anything for the interview, but I have been panicking.
It's all for JS (React, Node).
What should I be thinking about? What should I be prepping?1 -
Someone save me from this fucking stupid corporate web based trainings and let me focus on more important shit like re-factoring my code (ohh joke) and/or writing something more code then going what i just mentioned above.
-
I just watched the GitHub training videos at http://youtube.com/playlist/... and I am at the same basic comprehension level as I was when I started. Cannot keep track of all the switches, options, and commands and when it's best to use them! GAH!5
-
A news reporter asked Kobe how did he manage to maintain his performance being the best NBA player. Kobe replied and asked the reporter he know how does LA looks like at 4am.
Shit Kobe wakes up at 4am and go to training at court. Why I stay awake till 4am yet I'm a mediocre programmer lulz1 -
3 devs, one and myself are new hires. I started a week after the other new guy and my 3rd week of training is next week.
The other devices has been fixing what the Swift 3 update broke. We realized next update we will be fixing it. Time to learn Swift! -
Ok, you've got some free time and a folder full of bookmarks to get through the subjects you need for that cert....
....but it has been busy these past few months. One day out of your holiday just to chill and do nothing, then you can get to work....
....you have 9 days. 2 out of the 9 is ok just to relax, it is a holiday after all....
....ok, your going back to work in 2 days and the most you've done is read some semi-related articles that were shared on Twitter. Sort it out....
....24 hours to go, you've essentially done nothing productive. I guess I'll go back to fitting it in at work or convincing myself I'll do it when I get home after a long day.
Anyone else struggle with this? Not just for certs in particular, but just learning in general. -
Im dev in a huge company.
I take a 3 days training about the company purposes and goals.
As dev I dont give shit about company aims couse company is borring and there are like 100 levels between them and my real work. -
Downloads a whole bunch of training videos.
-this looks interesting (clicks magnet link)
-I want to learn this (clicks magnet link)
-This would be useful to know (clicks magnet link)
Watches 1 out of 100000 downloads
10+TB data
Secretly waiting for matrix like learning -
It seems dat the only growing career profile in bigdata domain is of BIGDATA trainer.
P.S. I don't need ny training. So stop mailing me. -
Garbage; learn with research and a good project or something.
..although so far, the bootcamps I've attended have been under a big corp and labelled as "training".. -
Don't laugh but can anyone recommend any free Javascript tutorial/training courses?
It's for a friend... No really13 -
Hi guys,
I'm a student of engineering. I pursued summer training in android in last semester.
Now at the end of this semester I have to pursue my second training.
Any suggestion what technology should I pick...
I'm currently really good at developing in android....
Should i continue to learn android further.
If yes then what should I learn further in android...2 -
A workout platform, which isn't focused on "hard" facts like hr or distance, rather using "soft" measurements like: Was the workout mentally demanding? How was your sleep? Etc.
Then combine this with some "hard" facts and see what makes your training more effective.
The api is more or less finished. Now the apps have to be developed.4 -
!rant
I just made a library card in order to get free access to free online training... I'm kinda ashamed of myself, even if I shouldn't. -
When employers expect high end developer results but only supply basic tools, training, and resources... “Doing your best” can only get one so far when deadlines are always in the air and research time is limited. Pls no.
-
I ain't getting any summer internship so thinking to do a good course on big data and hadoop. Can't find the free proper source for beginners😕! Any suggestions? Whats your plan btw..m thinking to dive into web dev as well.2
-
FUCKING. HAAR.
WHY CAN'T YOU FUNCTION PROPERLY EVEN AFTER SPENDING HOURS INTO TRAINING YOU???!!
DO YOU REALLY WANT ME TO ABANDON YOU CASCADE CLASSIFIER?
You were like a brother to me. Now look at what you've done.10 -
when we started this project for a customer we are working on we had a training about how their BE and FE is working, their coding style and so on. FE is in Angular 4 btw. During this training for FE we were about to create our first component. The trainer: "Ok, let's generate this component." He opened some very basic project that they have as a starting point, selected a directory, crtl+c ctrl+v, manually renamed everything. "There you have it. We successfully generated a new component!" 😳😵
We are still generating them like that 😅 -
I don't understand why corporate waste so much money on agile training they know that doesn't gonna improve performance of developer at all. Instead of it decreases his performance because of so many annoying meeting and reporting3
-
You learn with more zeal when you pay to learn. Unless you have abundance of internal motivation, pay for online training or learning packages, you will see what I mean.
-
Do you ever read and re-read the description of some up coming training sessions and it reads like porn to you?
And you're like, yeah, I picked the right profession. -
POCing a neural network thing.
Luckily it's a shallow network, but it's taking a frickin' eternity to train :( -
Anyone know any good free courses to learn programming for a total beginner?
The guy who needs it is looking to work with JavaScript and Node eventually. -
This was an incident during Angular JS training.
Few dudes had a 3 days training on Angular JS and I saw them walking with their happy faces but during the last day of the training the same faces were looked dull and I asked them why.
One of them said "fuck what is this Angular JS 2 ? I didn't know there is Angular JS 2 before the training was about Angular JS 1" and I was like 🤓1 -
!rant
Does anyone here know CodinGame.com? I just discovered it and wondered weather some of you know it and "play" it.
I think it's a very intersting concept, good for training and a good opportunity to challenge yourself. -
Almost all the company uses git, I even took a training about git and how does it integrate with internal tools.
In my team they use mercurial.
fml. -
Six hour of intensive training with Python. Every hour there is something so "WHAT THE F*** COME FROM THAT MAGNIFICENT S**T!?" in my head....
-
!rant
I am doing an API for our training center to store the workouts of the athletes in relationship with the mental & physical load, as well as sleep and health.
How do you document your APIs?
BTW I am using laravel.1 -
Who do you use for IBM stack training?
Need Infosphere Data Stage, Quality Stage, and Information Governance. -
Just spoke to a Barclay card women to ask something about their gateway 😒
She didn't know about there own systems capabilities
If it couldn't do monthly billing it would be a terrible system! At least light years behind such systems as PayPal who are already behind.2 -
When your replacement that your training didn't understand configuration management and just makes changes on one server instead of making a change set and deploying it to all the servers 😭
-
Getting an ElasticSearch Developer training this week, anyone here been already? If so, what was it like?2
Hand over from another developer who handled our internal data pipeline. I tried to set meetings for the hando... [read more]