I lost my sanity and googled ”FUCK YOU XCODE YOU FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT”...

That's how I found devRant.

Search history 😃

So frustrating when this happens.

chrome loves ram...

Reminded me of the good ol' days while moving house

I just applied for a job in Australia.
I live in Europe....

I'm on vacation.

Leave me the fuck alone.

added two .mp4 files in commit while testing!
I feel stupid.

Deleted those files before push

Do you still charge your clients extra for HTTPS being it’s practically a requirement now for SEO purposes?

What the hell YouTube

watching my model training...

You start new job and take over huge codebase without tests and documentation.

It turns out programming language is custom language made by previous developer who was the only one maintaining project.

There is no source version control.

Language runs in vm developed in Fortran.

No one cared to this day cause everything was working.

Project is critical for multi billion dollar corporation that sells medical equipment that keep people alive.

You can’t test your code on real devices only on virtual ones that were made using same custom language but you can’t find source code for it.

Previous developer accidentally died before you were hired.

You signed contract with penalties that will ruin your life.

Your first task is to add “small” feature.

Good luck !

“Debugging” is like being the detective in a crime drama where you are also the murderer.

How to boost profits

When you've been getting lots of comments on your pull request and have to keep asking for approval.

Wow. THE CEO JUST DID AN EMPATHIC SPEECH BECAUSE OUR PAYROLL GOT DELAYED.

He ran out of money. Begging for us to be pressured and bear his child that's even dead by now(his projects).

I guess someone said that it's already a sinking ship. I have to row my own boat and find a new course.

When I'm bored in a useless meeting, I try to guess how much that meeting just cost the company for nothing.
Today I got to 2000€ for 1hour meeting

"Let's create a docker-swarm cluster thingy for this application with horizontal scaling to learn docker and run this application better!"

This stuff is so overwhelming and I don't understand half of how to possibly set this up 😅

Explained rubber duck debugging to my girlfriend and a week later she got me this little guy 🤓

Every other day....

There’s somewhat of a magical moment when you teach the interns how to turn their huge switch statement into a function Pinter branch table....

Eliminating shotgun surgery as the project advances and new features are added to a module.

Colleges definitely don’t teach students certain things... and when I end up teaching them... the excitement and ideas they come up with are always great.. and they always end up with a stronger understanding of things.

(Embedded company .. all software here is C or C++) yes we use the optimizer.... sometimes you gotta do seemingly complex things to improve readability and maintainability.

Got two interviews today. Wish me luck. I'm nervous, but I think the candidates are probably more nervous.

I currently have the best problem ever:

Our client applications and APIs are so fast, users are complaining they don't notice that the UI changed in between the time they clicked a button and their eye drifts to the adjacent component. So now we're having to build visual cues to account for that.

#KillingIt

Failed!

Me: spends 2 hours on a script that converts graphs into colorblind friendly mode
Friend: why didnt you just grayscale the image
Me:
Me: uh

How to regex ?

I just remembered the first time I set up a Linux-Server. It was a simple Apache webserver at my first internship anf I didnt have a clue about literally anything.

My mentor guided me through and gave me literal step-by-step instructions (alright, now type... and now type...).

At the end he told me "OK, now run 'sudo rm -rf /*' to finish setting up". Me, being the naive and clueless motherfucker I am, happily nuked the everloving shit out of my newly setup server. I was like "Alright, WTF just happened??" He then told me "Now that you know how it works, do the entire thing again all by yourself. And you just learned an important lesson: NEVER exexute commands you dont know what theyre doing". I really did learn a lot on that day and still follow that lesson :D

Happens every single time... 😂

They have no idea.

So, I've been following a tutorial and explanatory series on YouTube about procedural terrain generation.

I dare saying it's going quite well!