A group of wolves is called a pack.

A group of crows is called a murder.

A group of developers is called a merge conflict.

When your repo gets forked on github for the first time

Friend used me as a rubber duck;
I did listen, but answered just with:
"Quack quack!".

I just saw the largest lan port kek

So my boss copied a code from stackoverflow and thought "foo" was a function or something... It was just an alias to a SQL select...

"A software Engineer? Why don't you do a real job instead of fixing people's computers?"

- ex gf 2011

"I'm proud you do something you love"

- wife 2016

hope this isnt a repeat. have a great weekend guys!!!!!

Programmers of today are like the monks of the middle ages. We use a language that people don't understand, we spend all our time sitting in a room reading, and people constantly ask us for advice but never really listens to the answer.

Pushed a month of work to production and left the office. Cool guys don't look at explosions

Have you ever wondered we programmers have so many strong communities.... Stackoverflow, devRant, Reditt, etc...
No other profession has such communities... Why? Why?
Because, we haven't built one for them.... 😂😁

iPhone app riddled with memory leaks from a team of interns. Big series of demos coming up. Managements solution?

Send instructions to the person giving the demo to kill the app every 20 mins or so.

So someone wants me to sign a NDA so they can use my open source software (MIT licence) in there software.

They also NEED to minify there php to save on storage and to boost performance. 😂

Best possible week 13 rant... 😑

Check out this superb website that I made..

http://localhost:8080

I am more thankful to StackOverFlow and Google than I am to my university.

Why the hell OS X doesn't have a developer friendly dark theme? :@ Puts so much strain on the eyes.

Our CTO has been told, this morning by management, that our development department is "too quiet" and that it's spoiling "the atmosphere" of the office space.

So we've ordered mechanical keyboards.

You know you're getting old when you have to increase the font size of your editor... 😫

Got this notification. Someone is testing on production environment.

Spaces or tabs? - Semicolons!

Calls himself web guru... all he does is WordPress

My current situation.

Hello, mister Boss man. If you'd please stop referring to me and my colleges as "resources". K, thx.

They said I needed to keep my commit messages "PG13".

What they failed to realize is every PG13 movie is allowed 1 instance of "fuck".

"I don't need math!
I'll just make videogames when I grow up!"
[Myself as a child]

SSH is the most basic thing a web developer should know.

Some people are just lazy to learn something and all they do is give hard time to other people.

!rant

What are people thinking when they are building datepickers (or any type of angular/jQuery plugin for that matter)?

Lets put all of the code in one file, place everything that should be dynamic and optimizable in constants, provide no localization support, finish it all up, publish it to bower and npm (so poor devs won't have to struggle) and last but not least don't accept pull requests with useful features for months!

the feeling when you have typed up ans signed a resignation letter and still need to turn it in and "the talk" with your boss.

made all the better by the fact that we are opening a new location in the time span of the 2 weeks notice I'm about to give.

oh and the boss will be going on vacation just after that.

Everytime I want to use a well recommended library which last commit was two years ago or longer i get suspicious

Forgetting/not bothering to bring your laptop to a long, boring meeting.