My latest post about my mother made me finally realize the whole picture.

Five minutes ago, I send her a long message that describes how I feel. This message will be the very last act of communication that will happen between us.

This felt like a bullet coming one inch away from my head. Like SWAT team rescuing me from a predator's basement where I spent the last ten years. Part of me already realized what happened and is serene, part of me still can't get used to an idea that this was, in fact, the end, and no further harm will be done.

My future is bright. It's so nice to feel that she doesn't know where I live.

I want a horror movie with some undergraduate IT student watching coding tutorials, ending up really liking videos of a specific youtube channel.

Then, the student send a message to that creator, and they start knowing each other. After a year, the channel author invites the student to come over.

That youtube channel is called Carl H.